Chapter 48
Having already been on the Good Morning Show sofa once before, you might imagine Kate would feel less overwhelmed at the prospect of doing it again.
You’d be wrong. She was a bag of nerves by the time the car eased to a stop beside the river embankment outside the studios, shivering inside her cap-sleeved, full-skirted black dress.
It was an old favorite, one of those pieces you reach for when you need something that makes you feel ready for anything.
Charlie was waiting for her and opened the car door, scanning her face. “Okay?”
She half nodded, half shrugged, not feeling okay at all. She’d stayed over at a hotel nearby last night and left the shop closed up, aware she’d probably return to a sour mess congealing in the summer heat.
“I think so,” she said. “I mean, I’m terrified, I just want to get it over with.”
She touched the small pendant around her neck, a delicate silver oyster shell and pearl she’d found in one of the harbor shops near Pink Cottage. It was her only jewelry beside her bangle. Just one bangle today, although she felt badly in need of two for good luck.
“Let’s go inside,” she said, anxious to get the ball rolling.
She appreciated the light you’ve-got-this touch of Charlie’s palm against the base of her back as she walked a step or two ahead of him.
He hadn’t faltered when she’d asked him to book her onto the show, pulling all the necessary strings to make it happen.
It hadn’t been all that difficult in actual fact: the promise of an exclusive reveal had had the bookers juggling guests like oranges.
—
Forty minutes later, Kate found herself being quickly hugged by Ruby and Niall during the ad break, neither of them hiding their interest in what she was going to say.
They knew she wanted to set the record straight; social-media-fueled drama was the show’s bread and butter, they were gagging for the scoop.
“Ready?” Niall said, as the floor manager began to count them down. Kate caught Charlie’s eye from his spot behind the camera, drawing strength from his steady presence. Ruby gave Kate’s hand a quick squeeze beside her on the sofa, and then they were live to the nation.
“As promised before the break, novelist Kate Darrowby is here with us again, this time to set the record straight about the ongoing saga surrounding her debut book, The Power of Love, ” Niall said.
“Let’s take a look back at the story so far.
” Ruby smiled, breezy, and the feed cut to a whistle-stop VT montage of the book’s release, a snippet of Kate’s previous sofa interview, the bestseller delisting scandal, snapshots of some of the avalanche of damning social media posts and speculation, all set to dramatic music.
It played out like a soap opera, complete with stand-up rows and trifle-slinging.
Kate kept her eyes focused on her laced fingers in her lap, not wanting to see the negativity right before she spoke up for herself.
“That all looks like quite the tumultuous ride,” Niall said, as Ruby nodded and gazed at Kate.
“That’s one way to put it,” Kate said.
“Do you feel you’ve been treated unfairly?” Ruby said.
Kate shook her head. “No, no, I don’t. People have reacted to what they’ve seen, and I haven’t responded or defended myself up to now on the advice of the team around me, which I totally understand and agree with.
But circumstances have changed recently and I need to at least try to explain myself so people can understand, if not forgive me. ”
“Go on,” Niall said, clearly being told by the producer in his ear to say as little as possible.
Kate forced her shoulders down and her chin up.
“My name isn’t Kate Darrowby, and I’m not an author,” she said.
“I’m Kate Elliott, a divorcée who needed a job, and the only job I’d ever done outside of my husband’s company was act on a soap when I was nineteen.
I’d had a couple of glasses of wine one night and wrote to my old agent, and that was how I came to be in the right place at the right time—or my letter did, anyway.
I was invited in to read an as-yet-unpublished novel, and if I loved it, they were looking for an unknown actor to stand in for the actual author who wasn’t able to publish it under their own name. ”
“And do you know who that author is?” Ruby leaned toward her, straight in with the question the nation really wanted the answer to.
Kate paused, feeling pressure on H’s behalf. “I genuinely don’t,” she said. “I wanted to, at the beginning, but given how things have turned out, I’m glad I don’t.”
“In case one of your family accidentally revealed that too?” Niall softened his smart aside with a rueful smile, but Kate wasn’t ready to let the dig slide.
“No,” she said. “My family has been dragged into this through no fault of their own.”
“The speculation around who the real author is has been feverish, though, hasn’t it?” Ruby said, refocusing the conversation back where she wanted it to be.
Kate nodded. “It has, and although I honestly don’t know who they are, they’ve sent me kind, supportive messages and I know that writing this story was a personal catharsis for them, never intended for public eyes.
They were brave enough to allow their publisher to share it with the public under certain conditions, and I know they’ve followed the fallout since with utter dismay.
Does it matter who the author is, really?
I was in tears on the train the first time I read it, because it’s soul-baring, and vulnerable, and ultimately redeeming.
I’d come through a horrible divorce and lost any faith in love, and reading that fragile, lionhearted love story made me believe again.
I felt the power of the words actually superglue my heart back together. ”
She straightened her shoulders, and imagined Liv straightening her crown.
“Did I expect it to snowball into such a success that I’d end up on TV and national radio and at events signing readers’ books? No, I absolutely didn’t.”
“And would you have refused the job if you’d known what it was going to lead to?” Niall said.
Kate took a breath. “I don’t honestly know. I’ll never be sorry that the book is out there. It’s been my honor and privilege to help it on its way into readers’ hands, but if I’d had the benefit of a crystal ball, there are some things I’d have done differently to protect the people I love.”
Ruby nodded. “It’s fair to say your family have become quite involved in the whole drama.”
Kate swallowed hard, because Ruby had unwittingly cued her up perfectly.
“Yes,” she said. “Readers have had their trust broken, something I didn’t reckon on, and I’m sorry to my bones for that because I’m a reader too, first and foremost—books are in my blood.
I accepted the job because love stories gave me somewhere to turn to when my daughter was tiny and didn’t sleep through the night, and when my husband didn’t come home at all, some nights.
They’ve made me feel seen and safe, so as of today I’d like to just be Kate Elliott again, part of the reading community. If they’ll have me.”
Ruby and Niall nodded in unison, and she plowed on before they could ask her any questions.
“I know many people have seen the video online of my sister defending me,” she said.
“Trifle-gate,” Niall interjected, with an ironic raised brow. He really did play up to the camera.
“She reacted in the heat of the moment,” Kate said.
“We lost our mum when we were little girls. Liv’s the eldest and has always felt responsible for me.
She’s the kindest, funniest, most loyal person you could ever wish to have in your corner, and I’d really appreciate it if people could leave her alone now, please?
She’s recently found out she’s expecting a baby, and all of this stress is too much on her.
She’s spent the last ten years building her fancydress shop up, she makes all the costumes herself by hand, and every morning for the last week someone has been throwing trifle at the windows. ”
Kate saw the way Niall and Ruby sat to attention at this turn of events, and she didn’t dare even look at Charlie.
“And I know it may sound harmless—my sister’s away at the moment, thankfully, so I’m clearing up the mess—but actually it’s become quite sinister.
I went out the other day to try to see who’s doing it, and a guy in a balaclava appeared and threw trifle right in my face.
In my hair, in my mouth, in my eyes. I was alone in the street at half past six in the morning, and I’m honestly not telling you all this out of self-pity, but because it needs to stop before my sister comes home. ”
Ruby looked horrified. “You poor thing, Kate, that’s horrible.”
Kate swallowed hard, relieved she’d made it through the interview. They’d allowed her to speak for longer than her allotted time slot, and she could see the floor manager urgently gesturing for Niall and Kate to wind it up.
Niall took his cue and delivered his endpiece to the camera, then the familiar jingle sounded to signal the show was off-air for the day. Ruby pulled Kate into a quick hug as they stood.
“I hope they catch him and force-feed him trifle until he fucking chokes,” she said into Kate’s ear, completely different to the mild-mannered persona she portrayed on TV.
Kate gulped back tears, because it was such a Liv thing to say, and then she found herself jostled around and being de-mic’d until she was finally back across the studio with Charlie.
He was subdued as they left the building, steering her across to a quiet bench in the shade of a willow tree on the embankment.
“I just hope that going public will be enough to stop him,” she said.
“And what if it isn’t?”
She sighed. “Then I’ll have no choice but to involve the police. I messaged Nish this morning to fill him in on everything, asked him to make sure Liv sticks to her social media ban for the next few days. He said she’s the new queen of Zen, which I can hardly imagine, but thank God right now.”
“You know it’s going to go nuclear online,” he said.
She pulled her mobile from her bag and turned it back on. It had been switched off in the studio and now burst into noisy life.
“Can I suggest something radical?” Charlie said. “A self-imposed social media ban might not be such a bad idea for you either, even if it’s just for the rest of today.”
She looked at her mobile, the furious torrent of alerts and messages stacking up, missed calls from journalists, and she closed her eyes, exhausted by the whole thing.
“If it wasn’t for my family, I’d chuck it in the river,” she said, and in that moment she meant it. So much of her life had been taken over by Kate Darrowby’s social media.
Charlie reached across and flicked it on to silent. “Better?”
She nodded, dropping her mobile in the bottom of her bag as if it was burning her fingers. If Liv could do it, maybe she could too; a day-detox at least. She’d done just about as much as she could manage for today.
“Stay in the hotel again tonight,” he said.
Kate had expected this. It had been Charlie’s idea for her to stay at the hotel last night. He’d made the reservation and billed Francisco Kate had almost insisted on paying for herself and then didn’t, because there was a certain justice to Fiona footing the bill.
“We’ve been over this,” she said. Last night had been necessary to ensure she didn’t miss her TV slot, but it was time for her to go home.
“Are you going to open the shop this afternoon?”
“Just for a couple of hours,” she said. “I feel bad closing all day—you never know when someone’s going to need an emergency Spider-Man mask.”
“Or you could just take the rest of the day off,” he said. “Get some rest?”
“I’m fine, really,” she said. “It’ll help take my mind off everything if I’m busy.”
“I could take the train back with you, keep you company?”
“He’s not going to come in the middle of the afternoon, Charlie, I’m not in danger. In fact, I doubt I’ll ever see him again now I’ve outed him on national TV.”
He didn’t look convinced.
“It’s important to me to do this on my own,” she said, more softly.
“Going in there today, doing that…it felt good, like reclaiming my old self. I’m not scared.
I’m not running away. It was my way of sticking my fingers up at the camera and telling him to piss off, and it feels amazing.
If I avoid going home now, or let you escort me and keep guard, then it unpicks all of that hard work.
I’m going to go home and open the shop, and then tonight when I go to bed I won’t lie there worrying about the morning. Bring it on.”