Chapter 10 #3
I took my drink from the little table beside me and swallowed some before answering. “Denisha’s pregnant.” That shut everybody the fuck up.
Mike frowned. “Your Denisha?”
“She ain’t my shit.”
“You know what I mean.”
Shawn looked at me, scratching his head. “It’s on you?”
“Might be.”
“Damn.”
I folded my arms across my chest. “It’s between me and another nigga.”
Mike nodded. “She gon’ test?”
“Yeah.”
Nobody said anything for a few seconds, then Shawn asked, “You fucked up ‘bout it?” I looked at him, and he lifted both hands before taking the blunt from Mike. “Aight. Dumb question.”
Darius started laughing, and I shook my head. “I had to tell Lacey, and that shit went exactly how you think it went.”
Mike took what Darius passed him. “Ohhh. Makes sense why her ass was standin’ outside Loretta’s earlier, lookin’ like she wanted to snap on somebody.”
I took another pull when it came back around and leaned against the railing. “She’s leavin’ after the festival.”
Darius looked over at me. “Again?”
“She live in L.A., nigga. Where the fuck else she ‘posed to go?”
“I’m just sayin’,” Shawn said. “Y’all been up under each other damn near every day since she got back.”
“And?”
Mike laughed. “You definitely actin’ like you don’t give a fuck.”
“I ain’t say I don’t give a fuck.”
“So what y’all doin’?” Shawn asked as u passed him the blunt.
I looked at him. “Fuck you mean?”
“I mean after she leaves. Y’all gon’ figure that shit out or nah?”
I rubbed my hand over my beard and looked out toward the parking lot. Between Solace leaving and this shit with Denisha hanging over my head, I didn’t have a fucking answer for him. “Man, I don’t wanna talk about this shit no more. I need another drink.”
Darius looked at me for a second. “You sure you ain’t pushin’ Lace away before that test can even tell you if you got somethin’ to be scared of?”
“I ain’t scared of no baby. If it’s mine, it’s mine. I’m gon’ love my child and handle everything I’m ‘posed to handle. Ain’t shit gon’ change wit’ me and Lace though. She ain’t seein’ it that way.”
Mike blew out smoke. “Bro, you gotta stop sayin’ the baby don’t change nothin’.”
I looked at him. “It don’t change how I feel ‘bout Solace.”
“That ain’t the same thing.”
“He’s right, bro,” Shawn shrugged. “A baby wit’ a woman who you ain’t wit’ could change a lot of shit. Denisha gon’ be ‘round ‘cause that’s yo’ baby mama. Solace gotta decide if she can live wit’ that shit. You can’t decide it for her, nigga.”
I took the blunt when it was passed and hit that shit, looking away from these niggas. I didn’t have shit to say to that.
Darius sucked his teeth. “That’s what I tried to tell his hardheaded ass yesterday.”
Shawn laughed, but me and Mike didn’t. “Ain’t nobody sayin’ give up on yo’ woman,” Mike added. “I’m sayin’ don’t act like she crazy ‘cause that shit hit her hard.”
“I ain’t say she crazy.”
“You ain’t gotta say it. Yo’ ass probably yelled it in twelve different ways.”
Darius damn near choked laughing as I glared at Mike. “You gettin’ real comfortable, mahfucka.”
“Nigga, me and Allison been married eleven years and got three kids. I’m tryna help yo’ grumpy ass.”
“Didn’t nobody ask you.”
“Then keep fuckin’ up.”
I shook my head and took another pull of the blunt.
The worst part was I already knew the nigga was right.
Denisha hadn’t done shit wrong. She came back and told me the truth as soon as she could.
Solace hadn’t done shit wrong by wanting the promotion she earned or needing time to figure out how she felt about possibly stepping into a life that included me raising a child with another woman. The situation was just fucked up.
We stayed out there smoking and talking shit until the cold finally drove us back inside the bar to keep drinking. After that, the conversation moved on. Mike started talking about his wife spending too much money on designer shit.
Shawn disappeared for almost twenty minutes with the same woman he had been talking about earlier, then came back acting like nobody noticed. Darius kept stealing fries off everybody’s plates after claiming he wasn’t hungry. I laughed more than I expected to, and honestly, I needed that shit.
By the time we left, I had enough liquor and weed in me to be relaxed without being too fucked up.
The house was quiet when I walked in. Keyana had left the light over the stove on like she always did when she went upstairs before I got home.
I checked the locks, turned it off, and went up to my room.
“Fuck,” I exhaled, staring at the empty ass bed. I stripped down and got in bed, reaching for a roach in the ashtray.
Mike was right about some shit I hadn’t wanted to hear.
If Denisha’s baby was carrying my baby, shit was gon’ change.
That didn’t mean I wanted Solace any less, and it damn sure didn’t mean I was lettin’ one bad night convince me that everything between us was over.
I wanted my woman, and if that was my child, I wanted my child too.
I just needed Lace to decide whether she could live with the shit.