Chapter 9
Danica
T he women immediately rushed to comfort me. I was embarrassed to be losing it in front of them, but there was no holding back the tears.
“Please don’t cry,” Seek requested, her own voice sounding suspiciously husky.
“If you keep this up, you’re going to have most of us joining you,” Kit told me. There was a softness to her voice that told me she was smiling despite her words.
My face was buried in my hands, but I lifted it when I heard the door open yet again.
“Maybe I’ll make a lasagna… Or a meatloaf. Oh…” Jenny stopped in her tracks, Gwen and Jordan on her heels.
All three of their arms were loaded up with plastic grocery bags, and they stood there staring at the group of us with concern written all over their faces.
“Are you okay?” Jordan asked, dropping her arms and placing the bags lightly on the ground. She hurried over to us, the other two right on her heels.
“What happened?” Gwen asked.
“Nothing,” I said, the word catching on a little sob. “Everyone has just been so…amazing.” I didn’t deserve all of this.
Smiles bloomed over the faces surrounding me and I saw the tension bleed out of their shoulders. They were worried that they’d done something wrong, when in reality I was sitting here crying because of how welcoming they’d been.
“So-sorry,” I gasped through the tears that I couldn’t seem to stop. “No one other than my own family has ever been so…helpful and kind.”
“Well, you’re part of our family now,” Kit pointed over to the picture that was hanging on the fridge.
I wiped the tears from my face. “Those girls are so sweet. The last thing I want to do is break their hearts if Smokehouse and I don’t end up being together.”
The women all cast glances at each other, but it was Kit who spoke up. “What makes you think you won’t?” There was no judgment in her tone, just curiosity. Like questioning why I thought the sky might not be blue.
“We didn’t exactly plan this,” I said, motioning to my still flat belly. “We don’t even know each other. And…I have…things that are going on right now that make it hard for us to even consider moving forward.”
“Is that why he brought you here?” Seek asked. She gave me a sheepish look. “Not that we mind having you. It was just a bit abrupt.”
“The club has some things going on, too,” Susie said. “We can’t explain it all yet, that’s for Smokehouse when he’s ready, but the guys are being a little overprotective.”
“Hopefully my brother gave you the option of coming here and didn’t force the issue,” Kit said with a scowl on her face.
“Oh. He didn’t make me come, though it wasn’t exactly my first choice.
It really was my only option, though. And now I’m glad, really, really glad to be here with all of you.
I…” Sighing, I told them about being married to Eli.
It would be better if they knew to look out for him in case he figured out where I was and tried to come here.
Another set of glances were exchanged and everyone’s worried gazes landed on Gwen. I looked around in confusion and Jordan finally took pity on me and explained. “Gwen had some trouble with her ex recently.”
I looked at the woman, but she was busy looking down at the ground. The way her shoulders rolled forward told me that whatever had happened had affected her in more than one way. “I’m so sorry.”
“Is your douche ex violent?” Seek asked, anger on her face.
“Oh…well, I don’t know. He’s never hurt me, physically, but I was also sort of…obedient, so he didn’t have a reason to,” I admitted, shame filling me at the realization.
“Understandable,” Gwen said, her eyes locking onto mine.
“Sometimes it’s just easier to let them have their way to keep the peace.
That’s what I did when I was married to Trent.
He wasn’t ever violent until recently. It’s best that Smoke brought you here.
You never know how men like your ex are going to react once they lose that control. ”
I nodded. “There’s something else… He’s not exactly my ex.”
“What does that mean?” Daisha asked, cocking her head.
“I’ve been trying to get him to sign the divorce papers for well over a month.
He refuses to do it. For some reason he thinks he’s going to win me back, even though I caught him cheating on me.
And then he had the nerve to tell me he’d been cheating our whole marriage.
” I shook my head and was happy to see the disbelief on the women’s faces.
“He assumed I knew since he’d been doing it for so long.
Acting like I’m the one being unreasonable. ”
“He sounds like a complete narcissist,” Sloane stated softly.
“If anyone knows about narcissists, it’s Sloane,” Tori said, rubbing a hand over the woman’s back in a soothing manner.
“Some of us have our own stories to tell you,” Sloane told me with a small smile, “but not tonight. We need to get you moved in and get out of your way so you can start getting comfortable.”
“Just know that we’re here for you if you need anything,” Kit said. “We’re all living in the clubhouse right now, thanks to that trouble we mentioned, so we’ll be around.”
“Thank you,” I told them, giving them all heartfelt looks of gratitude. “It’s been a long time since I’ve had a group of friends I could count on.”
“You’re stuck with us now,” Seek said, her tone cheerful.
“We’ll introduce you to all the kids tomorrow,” Tori told me.
“That sounds great. I love kids.”
“Sean is going to be so excited to see you,” Gwen said with a laugh. “He’s always going on about you.”
“Aw, that’s so nice. He’s one of my best students.”
We all chatted as we got up and began organizing the apartment together.
They told me about their families and a little about the club, but we didn’t dive deep into any topics.
Everything was kept light and fun for now.
Even mentioning Eli had cast a dark shadow over the place and I wasn’t eager to think about him anyway.
It seemed like whatever had happened with Gwen and Trent had been relatively recent and upsetting for all of them.
I didn’t want to be the one to ruin the mood with questions.
A couple hours flew past and by the time the women were calling out goodbyes as they left my apartment, I was smiling and at ease.
I was grateful that Smokehouse hadn’t seen me crying.
I didn’t want him to think that I didn’t want to be here.
I was so thankful he was letting me stay.
That I was getting the opportunity to get to know him and everyone else.
As though thinking of him conjured him forth, he walked through the door. His gorgeous green eyes latched on to me. “Smells good in here.”
“Thank Jenny—or Taz—for that,” I told him. “She made a lasagna.” The girls had told me about the nicknames the guys gave to them. Some used them, others still went by their first names, but it was cute that they each got their own.
“One of my favorites.”
“I’ll remember that.” I hurried over to the kitchen and pulled out some plates. Taking a salad from the fridge, I quickly dished both plates with the food that Jenny had left for us. When I turned, I found Smoke a few steps behind me watching me with an unreadable expression on his face.
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” I replied. Feeling shy, I scooted around him and brought both plates to the table.
“You don’t have to make my plate, Dani.”
I looked over my shoulder, realizing he was still standing in the same spot, though he’d turned in order to keep his eyes on me. Looking down at the plates on the table, I inwardly flinched. “I’m sorry.”
“Habit?”
Nodding, I sank down into my chair. It was a win against the routines I’d built over the years, though I doubted he knew that. Eli was always seated first while I brought over our plates and drinks. I watched as Smoke walked over to the fridge. “What would you like to drink?”
I swallowed back the insistence that I’d get it for myself. “Ice water, please.”
He searched the cabinets, and filled a glass with ice and water from the fridge. Then he grabbed a bottle of beer and came toward me.
It was impossible not to watch him. His muscles rippled under his t-shirt and cut as he worked. The veins in his forearms popped out as he gripped my glass and his bottle. His light brown hair was a little too long and was standing in spikes, as though he’d been raking his fingers through it.
My fingers twitched with the urge to do just that.
Instead, I clenched my hands into fists in my lap to keep them still.
He’d already offered to have me sleep in his bed and I’d declined.
I didn’t want to confuse him. It wasn’t that I didn’t want him.
I just knew that if I slept next to him we’d end up having sex.
There was no way I’d be able to refuse this gorgeous man.
And I didn’t want a relationship with him that was only sex.
That would just confuse us both. For our sake, and our baby’s sake, we needed something real.
We’d get to know one another and at some point we’d have to decide if we were going to be together, or just be friends.
If we chose the latter, I didn’t want months of regular sex gumming up the process.
That would make it hard to stay friends with him.
Just the thought of seeing him with another woman as I dropped our child off to spend time with him made anger simmer in my chest. It was a completely unreasonable reaction, but that's how strong my attraction was to him.
He sat down across from me, flashing me a grin as he picked up his fork. “Do you like to cook?”
“I do. Not as much as I like to read, but it’s a close second,” I responded.
“What do you read?”
“Romances,” I answered, giving him a guilty look. “I can’t get enough of them. I read pretty much whatever I can get my hands on, historical, shifter, vampires, dark, sci-fi-”
He tilted his head, a smile quirking his lips. “Sci-fi, is that like…aliens?”
I nodded and laughed. “Yeah,” I admitted.