5. Elouise Age 18
“Holy shit, have you seriously gotten that far?”
Maddie’s question breaks my concentration. I look up to find her trying to peek over my shoulder, but she’s too short to see anything.
Joking, I slap my hand down over the assignment I have on the counter in front of me. “No cheating, you… cheater!”
“Good one,” she rolls her eyes, “But for real, how are you almost done?”
I shrug, “It’s not like we’ve been busy.”
We both glance around the empty coffee shop, as if to confirm that things haven’t suddenly changed.
Maddie sighs, “Yeah, what a boring ass day. I thought people would be out shopping today.”
It’s my turn to roll my eyes, “That’s the day after Thanksgiving, not the day before.
Plus it’s not like people will come out to Darling Lake to shop.
Even the people that live here go into The Cities.
” I pause, gesturing to the empty street outside the shop.
“And I doubt the antique shops around here do Black Friday sales.”
“Touché,” she snorts, before letting out an exaggerated groan.
“Fine. If you’re going to be all productive and shit I guess I’ll do my Psych homework, too.
” Maddie backs away from the counter with a smirk and a nod toward the door.
“Guess that means you’ll have to help the hottie that’s about to walk in. ”
My cheeks start to heat just at the mention of hottie .
We’re halfway through our senior year and I’m still awkward as hell when it comes to guys. At this rate I’ll die a virgin. Thankfully, Maddie’s just as bad, if not worse, so I won’t die alone.
I’m sliding my homework down to the shelf below when the front door opens and the attached rain stick flips over, filling the space with the soft sound of coffee beans tumbling through a wooden tube.
“Wel-” I start to form the standard greeting – my lungs full of the air needed to form the words – but my eyes lock on the face approaching me and my brain skids to a stop.
The early evening sun is streaming in through the wall of windows across from me, framing the guy – the man – like an angel walking out of the clouds.
Tall. Broad. Unruly locks of hair. Penetrating gaze.
Oh.
Oh, holy shit!
Beckett.
In all his adult glory.
His chin dips down, just an inch, in the coolest gesture I’ve ever seen.
“Hey,” his voice is… deep.
Is it possible that it’s gotten even deeper? Does that happen?
There’s a sparkle in his eyes and I know it’s recognition.
“Hi!” my word cracks halfway through, sounding more like a squeak than English.
He stops directly across the counter from me, a smile tugging at his perfect lips.
I can’t keep my eyes on his. It’s too much. Too direct. So I let them jump around, taking in his height and the shape of his shoulders.
How many muscles does he have? Did he get taller?
I stopped growing when I was like 14 but maybe guys are different.
Remembering that I’m the one who actually works here, I clear my throat and try again.
“Hi there, um, can I, I mean, what can I get you? ”
Ohmygod, I sound ridiculous.
I force my eyes back up and catch him staring at my face. Which of course makes my cheeks darken even more.
This is too close.
I haven’t checked my makeup in hours! And I have that pimple. Oh shit the pimple!
My smile startsto falter, but I will it to stay in place.
I look good. Okay, I at least look decent.
It’s been three years since he’s seen me, and I know I look older.
I’ve learned how to tame my hair. I’ve toned down the body shimmer.
I’ve… well I still have that adolescent weight around my hips.
And thighs. And ass. And it’s probably not even adolescent weight, just regular weight, but I look okay.
At least BeanBag doesn’t make us wear uniforms. And I’m wearing my good jeans today.
Beckett shifts his weight, pulling his wallet free from his jeans. “I’ll take a large black coffee.”
Ugh, even his drink order is cool.
“Sounds good!” I tap the correct keys on the register and tell him the total, but he’s already holding out a Five.
My fingers tremble a little and I have to make two attempts before I get the cash register open.
Get it together, Lou. I scold myself, before reaching out, handing him back his change. Proud that the paper doesn’t flutter in my grip. “Just one sec while I get that for you.”
He makes a sound that I take to be understanding and I catch a glimpse of him putting the change into the tip jar as I spin away.
Out of the corner of my eye I see Maddie creeping at the doorway to the backroom, no doubt enjoying the show I’ve been putting on so far. I can’t even look at her when I grab the wrong size cup and have to put it back then pick up the Large one.
Reaching for the coffee spout, I realize I didn’t ask him which type of coffee he wanted. There’s a moment of paralysis before I decide to just pick for him.
I know Beckett. I used to be in love with him.
Used to. Not anymore. That’d be crazy.
My eyes move between the options before I settle on the dark roast. Rich, bold, robust. The perfect blend for Beckett .
I pull the lever down and watch the dark liquid pour into the cup.
“Hey, you around for dinner tonight?” Beckett’s voice vibrates the air and time slows while his question wraps around me like magic from a Fairy Godmother’s wand.
After all this time…
Spinning to face him, I breathe out the only answer I could ever give. “Yes!” My voice is full of breathy excitement and my mouth is pulled in the widest smile.
He asked me! Beckett just asked-
The spell pops as several things happen at once.
My spin comes to a stop with me facing Beckett. Beckett, who has a small silver cell phone pressed to his ear.
My heart also stops.
But what doesn’t stop –the hot as hell coffee inside the unlidded cup in my hand.
Hot liquid splashes over my knuckles.
My mouth drops open in shock. Whether from the burning of my skin or the scorching embarrassment, I’ll never know.
With a small noise of pain, I hurriedly switch hands and set the coffee on the counter, shaking out my right hand.
Maddie’s feet slap against the floor as she rushes out towards me, “Elouise!”
Beckett flips his phone shut and is shoving it back in his pocket when Maddie says my name. And right when I thought my life couldn’t get any worse, I watch his eyes widen before they drop to the name tag affixed to my shirt.
My hand throbs as my heart deflates.
He doesn’t remember me.
“Elouise?” he asks, understanding dawning in his expression. Then he looks back down to the hand I’m clutching to my chest, “Are you alright?”
Laugh or cry, bitch. Time to laugh or cry.
A slightly manic laugh bubbles out of me, “I’m fine. Not the first time I’ve spilled on myself.”
“She’s not lying,” Maddie agrees, handing me a cold wet towel to wrap around my fingers .
I’m sure she’s ready to laugh her ass off at me, but being a true best friend, she waits.
Maddie makes quick work pouring Beckett’s coffee into a clean cup and putting a lid on it before handing it to him.
Beckett takes it but keeps his worried gaze on me. “You sure you’re alright?”
I bite my lip and nod, because that line between laugh and cry is still very thin.
“Thanks so much for coming!” Maddie chirps, moving slightly in front of me.
And the bestest best friend award goes to…
Beckett looks like he wants to say more but thinks better of it and takes a step back. Then with another dip of his chin, he’s gone.
I wait until the door closes behind him, then I let out a muffled scream and sink to the floor.
My head drops back against the cupboards and I close my eyes.
I can feel Maddie slide down to sit next to me. “So…” she starts, “is your hand really okay?”
“Feels better already.” I hold it up. “Thanks for the towel.”
“Good.” Humor enters her tone, “Umm, want to tell me why you thought that grown ass man was asking you out?!” She barely gets the question out before she’s bent over her knees in hysterics.
Slitting my eyes open, I squeeze the towel above the back of her neck, letting cold water droplets fall onto her exposed skin.
She shrieks but keeps laughing. “Seriously Lou, that guy was so old. I mean he was hot. But old .”
“He’s only 26.”
She cocks an eyebrow at me. “One, that’s basically 30 and everyone knows your life ispretty much over by then. And two, how do you know his exact age?”
When I sigh, Maddie sits up straighter.
“Wait… do you know that guy?” She pries.
I slowly nod.
Maddie glances back over her shoulder, like she can see through the counter to where he’d been standing just minutes ago.
“That was Beckett. ”
“Beckett?” her head snaps back to look at me. “THE BECKETT?!” she shouts. “As in the man you’ve been planning to marry since the second grade?”
This over-the-top reaction is exactly what I need to tip me back towards laughter.
Shaking my head at myself, I confirm, “The one and only.”
Maddie fans herself. “Okay, I get it now. The obsession makes total sense.”
Chuckling I give her a shove. “I’m not obsessed.” She scoffs. “Okay, fine. I’m not obsessed anymore.”
Maddie picks up the wet towel from where I set it on the floor and tosses it towards the sink, missing it completely. “Well… you’re 18 now. Technically, you could date him if you wanted to.”
I close my eyes, settling my head back against the hard surface. “Never gonna happen.”