13. Goodnight
13
GOODNIGHT
Diana
I’d hit my limit.
I wasn’t proud of it, but it couldn’t be denied.
This was why I was lying curled up on my bed.
I told myself I was giving time to Madison , Elias and Emmylou , who were out in the living room, re-bonding.
But really, I just needed space from all the crap I’d learned that day.
Emmylou might have given every indication she day-to-day steamrolled her family in her role as matriarch of the O’Keefe clan, but Maddy exhibited some Emmylou Mini - Me characteristics when she put her foot down she didn’t want either of her parents there when she was interviewed.
She wanted me.
So she got me.
We weren’t in a room with a table and chairs like you see on all the true crime shows.
Detective Scott put us in a room with a couch and some armchairs. They were utilitarian, but more welcoming and comfortable.
Though , that was the only thing that was comfortable.
Hugger had phoned in the midst of this, and I couldn’t pick up the call, so he texted that they weren’t going to be able to escort us back home, but he was making other arrangements.
When it was all done, we had an Aces High escort, including Ink , Driver , Cruise , Gash and a police escort.
Whatever the boys were talking about was taking some time, because the interviews (yes, plural) took hours, and Hugger and Big Petey weren’t back yet.
On this thought, I heard the door open, lifted my head and saw Hugger coming in.
I wasn’t prepared for the wave of relief that hit me just seeing him.
But I couldn’t deny a wave of relief hit me, or how huge it was.
I started to push up on an arm, but he took one look at me and ordered stonily, “ Don’t fuckin’ move.”
Surprised at his tone, I didn’t fucking move.
I watched as he walked to the end of my bed and then I watched as he toed off his boots, put a knee to the bed, and last, I watched as he crawled up it.
I was in no mood for anything as hot as that.
Still , watching Hugger prowl toward me on my bed like a big cat was so good, a miracle happened, and I got in the mood.
He settled behind me, assumed the position of the big spoon and commanded, “ Relax .”
I lay back down, and with his arm around me, he pulled me close.
He then kept being bossy.
“ Talk to me.”
Okay , now I got his tone, and indications were I shouldn’t play poker.
One could say I dug a spoon, and I’d just discovered Hugger did it better than any other.
I still squiggled around so we were in our position of the night before, face to face, legs slightly tangled, and I tipped my head back to look at him.
The instant our eyes met, he smoothed a large hand up my spine and whispered, “ Baby .”
Nope .
Shouldn’t play poker.
“ I’ve felt the urge to murder,” I replied. “ Genuinely . I’m being serious.”
“ Fuck ,” he muttered.
I drew in a breath and let it out speaking. “ So , this is what the police are putting together. Esad Babi? went rogue from his daddy’s nefarious dealings. He decided to set up his own. He works with recruiters, like the one who located Madison online, in order to lure young women into their clutches and sell them to people like Esad . After they were…done with her?—”
Hugger pulled me closer.
I skipped forward in the story.
“ They thought she was unconscious and left her where she was. Madison , who seems to have made an art of hiding how strong and smart she is, pretended to be that way in the hope they’d do just what they did and she’d be able to get away. After all they did to her, Harlan , she had the presence of mind?—”
I gulped.
“ Di , honey, maybe we shouldn’t go over this,” Hugger murmured, now stroking my back.
“ No , I need to get it out, if you’ll listen.”
“’ Course I’ll listen, baby. That’s why I’m right here.”
How in this shitty, shitty world, where such hideous things happened to such good people, did Harlan “ Hugger ” McCain corner me in an elevator, and in doing so, become a part of my life?
I shouldn’t question it.
I should savor it.
I did that as I went back to sharing.
“ As we know, her ploy worked, she grabbed Esad’s phone and got the hell out of there. A good Samaritan picked her up and took her to the nearest emergency room.”
“ Right ,” Hugger said.
“ They’re surmising Esad found her and his phone missing, and knew his ass was in a sling, so he came clean to Daddy so Daddy could cover for him. Daddy went into action, calling Maddy on his son’s phone the next morning, giving her instructions. Tell the police it was him who did the deed. If she didn’t, he would not rest until he hunted her down and shared his displeasure. He advised Maddy she wouldn’t end that episode breathing, and she wouldn’t be the only one. He’d go after everyone she loved. Unsurprisingly , that threat worked and that was what Madison did.”
Hugger appeared confused.
This was my reaction too.
Hugger voiced his confusion.
“ Why didn’t he just threaten her to keep quiet? Why would he put himself in that spot?”
“ Rayne talked to me after,” I began to explain. “ He said they think that the senior Babi? did this because none of the DNA would come back to him. He’d be exonerated, she’d be discredited. After falsely reporting, even if she did eventually point the finger at Esad and his boys, a good defense attorney would have a field day with her on the stand. And according to Rayne , that’s one way Babi? gets his giggles. Messing with the police. And if he can make them and a witness appear incompetent, all the better. So it was a twofer for ole Imran . He gets his son off, and he gets to play with the cops. Win -win for him.”
“ And now?” Hugger asked.
“ Now , the Feds are pursuing this network of recruiters and their buyers. I guess they’re transporting these girls everywhere. So they’ve got an arrest warrant for Esad , and from mugshots, Madison has identified the two guys that were with him, so they have warrants for them as well. And the Feds sat down with her. She couldn’t give them much, though she was very thorough with her description of the man who groomed her and was able to identify him from a photo array too. She was scared sick at the time, so she didn’t pay a lot of attention, but she did say she saw other girls there. Though she didn’t know how many, she just saw two. And between Maddy , who doesn’t know Phoenix at all but gave a description of where she was taken, and the good Samaritan , who gave a thorough report at the hospital, they’ve got a vicinity of where this place is.”
“ Some good news.”
I nodded. “ And there’s more. Esad’s phone was a huge get. It’s been a treasure trove for them. And if they can pull in Esad and his boys, and they can get one of them to talk, they think this is going to be huge and the pins of that organization will start toppling.”
“ Okay , yeah. That’s good too.”
It was.
“ They took her phone,” I noted. “ Esad and his assholes took it, and her purse, so she had no identifying information. But she packed a bag before she took off on her folks, that bag remained with her, and she grabbed that too when she escaped. I get why they took her phone and purse. But I think it’s weird that they wouldn’t take her belongings from her.”
“ Don’t know how these clowns work, babe. But at least she had her own shit with her when she got away from them. Maybe that was a comfort?” he suggested.
I hoped so.
Now , for the rough part.
“ They’re taking them,” I whispered.
“ What ?”
“ Maddy , Elias and Emmylou . They’re getting everything sorted, and tomorrow morning, they’re taking them into protective custody, at the very least until this Babi? situation is sorted. But maybe even longer, if Maddy has to go into WITSEC . Either way, I’ll lose contact since she can’t talk to me. That might just be for the interim, or it might be forever.”
“ Di ,” he murmured tenderly.
I shoved my face in his throat and burrowed into him.
“ I know it’s better for her,” I said to his skin. “ I know it. But I don’t want her to go. And WITSEC ? Her entire life was turned upside down, now it’s gonna be turned upside down again?”
“ It’s what’s best for her, what’s safest.”
“ Yeah ,” I grumbled.
He was right, of course.
I just hated that she’d been through so much, and now she had to go through more.
“ Scott was seriously forthcoming about shit,” Hugger observed.
I pulled my face out of his throat. “ He was. But I also sat in on the interviews because Maddy wanted me to.”
He stopped stroking my back in order to hold me tight, whispering, “ Babe .”
“ It’s okay. I’m okay. I was honored she asked.”
He got a funny look on his face before he said, “ We’re gonna have to talk about your bent to sacrifice yourself to be all you need to be for other people.”
“ I survived, Harlan .”
“ Never forget the look of your face, and of you, curled up in here, hiding away so no one will see you lick your wounds. Yeah , you’re a survivor, but how much you gonna make yourself take before you realize how much it’s taking out of you?”
Instead of answering, I shoved my face in his throat again.
He returned to stroking my back.
So I guessed I answered him.
I decided a change of subject was in order.
“ Emmylou is taking over. I’ve learned in the Texan way of doing things, there are gender differences in making sandwiches. The boys got ones with three inches of lunchmeat. Me and Maddy only had two inches.”
Hugger chuckled.
I pulled my face out of his throat again in order to look at him. “ Two inches is a lot of meat, Hugger .”
He got a certain look on his face and kept chuckling.
And he said, “ Not really.”
During this awful day, was I really going to laugh?
I couldn’t help it.
I laughed, even as I bossed, “ Get your mind out of the gutter.”
“ Right ,” he pushed out through his continuing amusement.
“ Ink , Driver , Cruise and Gash did their manly best, but I feared a wafer-thin-mint moment was going to happen.”
Hugger’s brows drew together. “ Wafer -thin-mint?”
“ That scene in the Monty Python movie where the guy eats so much, he explodes.”
“ Haven’t seen it.”
“ You must. It’s a classic.”
He slid a hand over my hip (nice). “ Maybe we’ll do that our next movie night.”
Our next movie night .
Nicer .
“ Also , you’ll probably be pleased to know, Emmylou is using the cubed beef we bought so I could craft my fabulous shredded-beef tacos to make beef and noodles tonight. She needs numbers of who’s coming to dinner.”
“ I’ll get those for her,” he replied.
“ Your turn,” I said.
He sighed before he dropped to his back and pulled me on top of him.
This wasn’t a better or worse position with Hugger .
They were all just right .
His big, long, burly frame was just so snuggly .
“ I need to report all this shit to them,” he shared. “ But even when I do, I don’t think their mission will change. Aces and Chaos are out, Resurrection is gonna deal with the Babi?s .”
“ As a law-abiding citizen, I see why this is concerning. As a person who likes you, and they’re your friends, I see why this is concerning. As a person who likes them, again with the concern. After all I heard today, I don’t have enough left in me to give a shit about the Angels of Death going after these assholes.” I tipped my head to the side and asked, “ Where are you with that?”
“ Goal is to defeat the enemy. Better goal is to defeat them and humiliate them,” Hugger replied. “ I don’t think they’ll like what Resurrection has planned. I think they’d hate it more, rotting in a prison for the rest of their lives.”
I saw his point.
“ That means?” I queried.
“ That means we hope the cops pick up Esad and his bros. Also that they nab Imran , for whatever they can pin on him, and do this before Resurrection gets messy. But when they do that, we’re always out. After learning what was done to Maddy , they refuse to back down. When they find out there’s a racket going on, they’re gonna go all in until they dismantle it. So bottom line, no matter what we think of their intent, we’re out.”
An unhappy thought occurred to me right then.
“ With Maddy going, and Resurrection taking over, does that mean you’re leaving?” I asked.
He shook his head, and the tension that had begun winding through my body subsided.
“ The last few days, Buck’s been trying to reach out to Imran for a parlay. He’s not responding. Part of what Buck wanted to talk about was to be certain you and your dad were off their radar. Since Imran isn’t gonna sit down for a chat so we can get some shit straight and set some ground rules, we gotta keep you and your dad covered until we know neither of you is in play.”
“ So you and Big Petey are staying?”
This time, he nodded. “ And Dutch , Jag and Coe . Eight , Muzzle and Linus are going under.”
I hoped those boys were safe after they went “under.”
“ What about Core ?”
“ Core has a woman. He’s heading back to Denver . Once a brother of Resurrection claims a woman, Wash assigns them duties that won’t get their asses arrested or dead.”
Eep !
“ Okay ,” I forced out, deciding to sidestep that particular discussion.
“ Though , just sayin’, you and me are doin’ this, so even if things were copacetic with you and your dad when it comes to the Babi?s , I’d be staying so we could see to this.”
On his this , he gave me a squeeze.
My mood shifted immediately, I smiled big and repeated, “ Okay .”
“ Now we need to talk about the sleeping arrangements for tonight.”
Another mood shift. “ Harlan? —”
“ Babe , we’re not there.”
“ No , but you need some good sleep and the situation at my place demands you do it here, and you’re not going to do it on the floor when there’s a bed in this room big enough for two. I talked with the boys, and both Ink and Cruise have air mattresses. They’re delivering one for Elias .”
I took a chance with his no-touch policy (that still included a great deal of touching, which reminded me I needed a new list, one of things to talk to Hugger about) and stroked his beard.
It felt great, and he didn’t quibble, so I kept doing it and returned to speaking.
“ It’ll be hard, I know, but I figure we can keep our hands off each other for one night.”
“ Hard enough getting sleep knowin’ you’re down the hall. Probably impossible with you right beside me in a big, soft bed.”
I really didn’t want to do it, but the situation warranted it.
I smirked.
Hugger moved his hands to my waist and squeezed.
“ You getting off on knowing what you do to my dick isn’t helping matters, babe,” he noted.
“ Sorry ,” I lied.
He sifted his long fingers into the side of my hair, tucking it behind my ear, adding a nuance to the touch he’d given me last night, which I liked, making it better, which I loved.
“ I don’t want you thinkin’ I’m taking advantage,” he said softly.
I blinked.
I stared.
I shoved my face in his neck and did it hard.
Who was this man and what did I do in this life to deserve being cornered in an elevator by him?
“ It’s Big Petey’s idea,” he went on. “ Not yours. And you got a heart the size of Alaska , and it’s so golden, it’s blinding. You want me to get good sleep. And you constantly put everyone else in front of yourself and?—”
I lifted my head at the same time I rested my fingers on his bearded lips.
“ I wanted to offer it to you last night,” I told him. “ I was ecstatic when Big Petey made that suggestion. And yes, that’s about you, and me wanting you to get good rest. But it’s also about me, because I like you, I’m attracted to you, I’m loving getting to know you, and I foresee, eventually, you being here anyway.”
This time, he pulled a bunch of my hair over my shoulder and started twirling it.
Reluctantly , I shifted my fingers from his lips.
“ And it’ll be nice, not having to be alone on the last night we have Maddy with us,” I whispered.
With my hair still in his fingers, he stroked my jaw. “ Then I’m in here with you in your bed tonight.”
How did I know that was what he’d say?
Seemed I wasn’t the only one with the bent of putting others before myself.
“ Can you take tomorrow off too?” he asked. “ Give yourself some time to deal with losing her.”
My boss was a hands-off person in the sense that she pretty much didn’t notice anything going on except what she was in the middle of doing.
Annie would notice if I didn’t get work done.
She wouldn’t notice if I didn’t show up for three days, and when I returned, she’d say something like, “ I thought something seemed off at the workshop.”
It was good she wasn’t a professor, or she’d be the example that proved the stereotype.
“ My boss is pretty cool. I’ll call her, because that’s a good idea.”
“ How ’bout doin’ that now, getting it out of the way, and we’ll go out and spend some time with Maddy so you got that before she has to go away.”
This was a good plan, so I moved carefully to reach for my phone without losing much contact with him.
I then hit go on her number.
She answered probably half a second before it went to voicemail.
“ Yes ?”
“ Hi , Annie . It’s Di again.”
“ Hello , dear.”
“ Listen , I’m sorry. I need to take tomorrow off too.”
“ You’re not here?”
See what I mean?
“ Yeah . Remember ? I called you this morning asking for a personal day.”
“ Yes , yes. I forgot,” she mumbled.
“ So is it okay if I take tomorrow off? I’ll explain when I come into the office on Wednesday .”
“ Of course, Di . Whatever you need. Wait . Where are you with the Galligan’s painting?”
“ Still working on it. But I’ll have it done by the time you promised it to them.”
“ And the Harris’s icon?”
“ That’s up next.”
“ Fine then,” she said distractedly. “ See you Wednesday .”
And then she proved how distracted she was by hanging up on me so she could get on with whatever she was doing.
I tossed my phone aside and announced, “ I’m good at work.”
“ All right. So are you good to go out there and get some time in with Maddy before she goes?”
I was, absolutely, and I wasn’t, also absolutely, but the latter bit was only because we’d have that time knowing she was going.
“ Let’s go out.”
Hugger cupped the back of my head so he could bring it down to his for a bristly lip brush and then he rolled us both out of bed.
“ You think Emmylou will make me a man sandwich?” he asked as we walked hand in hand to the door. “ I didn’t get lunch.”
“ I think Emmylou would craft an entire Thanksgiving dinner in half an hour if one of the men who looked after her girl asked for it.”
His deep voice held humor when he agreed, “ I think you’re right.”
He opened the door and the scent of sugary goodness wafted down the hall.
“ See ?” I asked Hugger upon being assaulted by that smell.
He smiled down at me.
Damn , but he had a great smile.
We hit the living room to see Big Petey gabbing with Elias in the living room, and Emmylou and Madison in my kitchen, making cookies.
And sandwiches.
“ Pete says you two didn’t have lunch, Hugger ,” Emmylou called. “ Dinner is only a couple of hours away, but I’m making you boys something to tide you over.”
“ Obliged ,” Hugger replied on a beard twitch.
“ What kind of cookies are those?” I asked.
“ Mama’s famous almond cookies,” Maddy answered.
“ Oh my God , I love almond,” I told Emmylou .
“ I aim to please,” Emmylou murmured as she carted two plates weighed down by massive sandwiches and such big piles of chips they covered the sandwiches, which I suspected would “tide over” Hugger and Big Petey quite nicely.
Hugger sat with Pete and Elias in the living room to eat his sandwich.
I went to the kitchen to help with cookies.
* * *
“ What’s a yurt?” Emmylou asked Jagger .
Bit of news: Jagger was, indeed, as handsome as his older brother. A little less intense, but no less good-looking.
Roscoe was also cute, if bikers could be overtly cute, though Roscoe proved they could, and he wore big, black-framed Buddy Holly glasses, which made him cuter.
We were all sitting around the dinner table, munching on cookies after scarfing down Emmylou’s insanely good beef and noodles.
I needed to get her recipes before she left.
“ It’s a round tent that doesn’t have a center support,” Jagger told Emmylou . “ And I only know that because my wife has an adventurous spirit. She had a hankering to stay in a yurt. I got her to one and I can’t say it sucked.”
“ Where all have you been?” Elias asked.
“ Better to ask where they haven’t,” Big Petey butted in. “ The weather’s good, they’re off somewhere all the time.”
“ Only young once,” Emmylou stated. “ Get the wanderlust out of you, hunker down and create your family.”
“ Think when we have ’em, Arch is gonna strap our kids to her and me and get us on the road anyway, Miss Emmylou ,” Jagger replied.
“ To each their own,” Emmylou stated. “ Children need stability, but that comes in the form of their parents, and the rest doesn’t matter.”
I looked to Maddy to see how she was dealing with all of this.
She was biting into a cookie with a little smile on her face aimed at her mother.
There it was, more healing.
She had a long row to hoe, but at least now she had the people she needed around her to do it.
Eight pushed his chair back.
“ Best get goin’,” he declared.
The rest of the boys followed suit, so we all got up.
There were handshakes, claps on the back, murmurs of farewell, lower murmurs of gratitude from the two older O’Keefes , and I got hugs too, particularly long ones from Eight and Muzzle .
But like they’d been doing since they showed days ago, they kept their distance from Maddy .
Until they were at the door and Eight had it open, ready to walk out.
That was when Maddy cried, “ Wait ! That’s it?”
All the men stopped and looked back at her.
No one said anything.
Then Maddy burst forth, hit Eight on the run and wrapped her arms around him.
I knew, by the look on his face as he curved his tall body over hers and returned her hug, that whatever he was going to get up to, if you agreed with it or not, it was his calling.
“ Thank you,” I heard her whisper the first words she said to him.
And the new look on Eight’s face both gutted me and restored my faith in humanity.
“ My honor, little one,” he muttered.
Oh shit, it was happening again.
I was going to cry.
I jumped when Hugger slung an arm around my shoulders and tucked me to his side.
We watched as she did the same with Muzzle but with Linus , Core , Dutch , Jagger and Roscoe , who she didn’t know as well, she just waved.
Muzzle was the last out the door, but he left his head inside it and said to Maddy , “ Every second you live good and strong, babe, you beat them. Keep kicking their asses, Maddy . You got this.”
Maddy emitted a soft sob.
Elias wrapped his arms around his girl.
Muzzle disappeared from the door.
* * *
Hugger and I were at our respective sinks in the bathroom, each of us brushing our teeth.
Why did I love looking in the mirror and seeing Hugger at my side with toothpaste foam in his beard?
“ Di ?”
At Maddy calling my name from the bedroom, I turned to look at Hugger in person, before I spit, rinsed, wiped, and left the bathroom.
Maddy was standing just inside the door.
“ All good?” I asked, going to her.
“ Can I ask you to do something?”
“ Anything .”
When I said that, something washed over her face, something warm and wonderful, and sad and sorrowful, before she reached out and took my hand.
She fiddled with my fingers while she watched.
But she didn’t say anything.
“ Maddy , you okay?” I asked.
She lifted her head. “ Don’t get up and say goodbye to us in the morning.”
I felt like I’d been punched in the sternum.
“ Maddy ,” I whispered.
“ I can’t say goodbye to you, Di .”
Damn it!
I’d managed to hold them at bay when the guys left, but I wasn’t sure I could do it this time.
“ We go to sleep, like normal, except Mama and Daddy are here,” she stated. “ Then you wake up, and I’m gone.”
“ Honey ,” I pushed out.
She latched onto my hand hard. “ Don’t make me say goodbye to you. Just say goodnight and we’ll pretend I’m not going away.”
My voice was croaky and my throat hurt like crazy when I asked, “ Can our goodnight include a hug?”
Her answer was to walk right into me.
We held on to each other for what was a long time but felt like seconds.
A million words came to my mind when she broke free, but I couldn’t get any of them out of my mouth.
She stopped at the door, looked back at me, and I committed to memory her peaches and cream skin, her pretty blonde hair and her beautiful blue eyes.
“ Goodnight , Di ,” she said.
I was losing it, but I managed to get out, “ Goodnight , Maddy .”
She shot me one of her little smiles and disappeared behind the door.
I dropped my head in my hands and almost went to my knees.
What stopped me from doing the last was Hugger swinging me up in his arms and carrying me to bed.
Once we were there, I burrowed again and used all the rest of my energy to stop myself from breaking down.
“ Let them go,” he whispered.
“ Tomorrow ,” I choked out.
“ Okay , baby,” he agreed.
He kept hold on me as he rolled side to side to turn out the lights on the nightstands.
I belatedly realized his chest was bare, and hairy.
I didn’t have it in me to process this. I just had it in me to feel Hugger yank the covers from under us and pull them over us.
“ I’m never gonna get to sleep tonight,” I told him.
“ Good you got the day off tomorrow, then,” he replied.
“ Yeah ,” I mumbled.
Hugger twined his long legs with my shorter ones and held on.
I listened hard for signs of life in my house.
There weren’t any.
I kept listening.
And , held safe in Hugger’s arms, I fell asleep doing it.
* * *
When I woke, Hugger was the big spoon again.
I knew he knew I was awake when his arm around me pulled me deeper into his body.
And I knew he knew I heard the noises beyond my bedroom door when he kept holding tight.
Eventually , there was silence, and my body, tense from toes to top of my head, remained that way.
There was a quiet knock on the door.
I didn’t move.
I felt Hugger lift his head before he called, “ Yeah ?”
“ They got our girl. She’s all good,” I heard Big Petey say quietly.
“ Thanks , brother,” Hugger replied.
The door snicked shut.
I turned in Hugger’s arms, pressed close and let the tears go.
Hugger tangled his fingers in my hair, held me tight with his other arm, and let me.