14. Parker
14
PARKER
I t feels like it takes an hour for my body to finally calm after Danny climbs off my bed and leaves. Despite the two orgasms he gave me, I feel hyped and agitated because he didn’t just hold a toy or watch me tonight. He pulled my fingers out of my pussy and replaced them with his own.
I came around his fingers. I came all over his hand. I had an orgasm because he touched me, and even if he didn’t realize when he did it, tonight changes everything. Last night when he didn’t come to me, I thought whatever we were sharing in the darkness was finished. It’s why I didn’t bother getting any good toys out tonight and decided to give myself what I expected to be a disappointing orgasm by my own hand and my little clit sucker.
I’m not sure about other women, but I find using my own fingers generally disappointing and frustrating. My fingers aren’t long enough, the angle is odd, and no matter how many I push into my body, they never feel as thick or satisfying as when a man pushes his fingers into me.
I wasn’t expecting him to come to me tonight, and when he did, I was so happy it changed me. When he breached my body with his fingers, he branded me in a way I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to erase. Whether he meant to or not, he claimed me tonight, and I have no idea how I’m going to cope with his nonchalance in the daylight.
When the pleasure of my orgasm slowly fades, a melancholy takes its place, and silent tears slip from my eyes. I don’t try to stop them, what would be the point? They belong to him just as much as I do now.
I wonder if he knew how much this would affect me. Was that the point? Did he take pleasure in knowing he claimed me, then walked away and rejected me so I’d feel how he did when he told me he wanted me and I said nothing?
The rest of the night slips by in minutes that last a lifetime. I plan our life over and over, then I destroy it, reminding myself that I’m not his, no matter how much it feels like I am. I don’t sleep, wishing he was here, wishing he’d never come at all, and missing him with an intensity that I can only liken to grief because he’s not with me.
Only a single, thin wall separates us, but it feels like miles, the distance so insurmountable I doubt the gap can ever be breached. By the time my alarm goes off, my eyes are gritty from exhaustion and crying, but I drag myself out of bed and do my best to hide my heartbreak beneath a layer of concealer and lies.
I’m calm and resolved by the time I duck under the roller shutter door and into the shop. Penn offers me a wave as I pass, but he’s absorbed in a phone call and barely pays me any notice as I slip past him and into the break room.
Quickly pulling on my coveralls and work boots, I shove my bag into my locker, then open the door to the office and step inside.
“Morning,” I call to Henry.
“Good morning,” he says, turning to face me. His smile slips away when he sees me, then softens into an expression of concern. “What happened?” he asks.
“I didn’t sleep very well,” I say, forcing a smile to my shaking lips.
“You’re not a good liar,” he says, his concern so obvious that I hope he never tries to play poker, because his emotions are like an open book all over his face.
“Fine, I didn’t sleep at all,” I confess.
“What did he do?” Henry asks.
“Who?”
“Danny. What did he do? Did he hurt you?”
“What? God, no, nothing like that,” I rush to assure him.
His whole body sags with relief. “Oh, thank God. So, if he didn’t hurt you, what did he do?”
“Nothing. I should get to work,” I say, avoiding answering.
Pushing out of his chair, Henry wraps me in his arms. “I know we just met, but I’m here for you,” he whispers against my ear.
Lifting my arms up, I wrap them around his back, clinging to him like I’m drowning and he’s my life raft.
“Oh, honey,” he coos, squeezing me tightly.
“Is everything okay?” Penn asks.
Jumping apart, Henry clears his throat, his cheeks red with embarrassment.
“We’re fine. Just bonding,” I say, mouthing “Thank you” to Henry before I spin around and face Penn. “Do we have a busy day planned?” I ask, distracting him.
“Really busy. But that was Lulu on the phone. Poppy is spiking a temperature, and she wants to take her to the doctor’s office, but she’s asking for me.”
“Go,” I immediately say.
“Bay is at home with the kids because Missy has to?—”
Interrupting him, I shake my head. “It’s fine. Henry and I will cope. Go be with your baby. She needs you.”
“Thank you,” he says, his shoulder slumping with relief. “If she’s feeling better, then I’ll?—”
I interrupt him again. “Penn, it’s fine, this is why you employed me. Go be with your family.”
“Thank you, guys, any problems, just call,” he says as he turns and sprints from the room.
When I step forward to follow Penn out, Henry’s hand lands on my arm, and he squeezes reassuringly.
“I’ll be fine,” I tell him.
“Of course you will,” he agrees.
The rest of the day is one of the longest and busiest of my life. Henry calls all of the day’s customers and lets them know there might be a delay on their cars being finished, and all but two of the clients are fine. Not wanting to let the customers down or make Penn feel like I can’t cope, I still work without stopping until all of the planned jobs are done. It’s after nine p.m. by the time I hand Henry the last of the day’s paperwork and slump down into a chair in the office.
“You didn’t have to stay with me,” I tell him.
“And like I said the other ten times you’ve told me that, I’m happy to help. Plus, there’s no way I’d leave you here alone at night.”
“I’m driving you home,” I announce.
“You don’t need to do that; I can get the bus or an Uber.”
“Or I could drive you,” I say, putting my hands on my hips and staring at him pointedly.
“I don’t want you to have to do the long drive home alone,” he protests weakly, clearly wavering.
“I don’t mind, I enjoy driving, and it’s less than an hour.”
“I can pay for your gas,” Henry offers.
“No, you can’t. But you can stop arguing.”
Lifting his hand, he mimes zipping his lips, then mouths, “Thank you.”
Once we’ve grabbed all of our stuff and locked up the garage, Henry follows me to my car and climbs into the passenger seat. The moment I close my own door, my cell beeps, signaling I have a text. Pulling it from my pocket, I glance at the screen. It’s another message from Danny. He texted earlier to see what time I was going to be back for dinner, and I replied letting him know I was working late and for him to eat without me.
Danny: Hey, are you still working? Do you need me to come down there and pass you stuff?
A soft smile tips my lips as I read his words.
Me: Just leaving work now. Henry stayed late with me, so I’m driving him home.
His reply is immediate.
Danny: Wait for me, I’ll drive with you.
Me: Already left, I’ll be fine.
“Danny?” Henry asks, smirking as he arches an eyebrow at me.
“Yeah, he’s been cooking dinner for us while he’s not been at work. He was just seeing if I was okay,” I say, downplaying how warm and fuzzy it makes me feel that he’s checking up on me.
“We got interrupted before you had a chance to spill all the tea on you and him. How long have you been together?”
“We’re not together,” I say, unable to keep the sadness out of my voice.
“Okay, so how long have you been sleeping together?”
“We’re not sleeping together.”
Sighing, Henry shakes his head. “Fine, how long have you been fucking?” he asks, his cheeks turning pink, clearly embarrassed by the curse word.
I shake my head, denying his words without actually refuting his suggestion.
“There’s obviously something going on between you guys. You started telling me about the airport at dinner the other day, so clearly something happened.”
“I love him,” I blurt, forcing my head to face forward, all of my attention on the road ahead.
“So, what’s the problem?”
“Surely, it’s obvious. Like I said the other night, he’s him and I’m me.”
“I mean, is it a religious thing?” Henry asks, his tone confused.
“No. But you’ve seen him. He looks like a male model, and I’m…” I trail off, not wanting to admit that I’m just not good enough.
“Parker, I’m into men, and even I know you’re gorgeous,” Henry shouts, shocking me.
“I’m not saying I’m ugly or anything, I know I’m pretty and I have great tits. But the girls he dates don’t look like me. He goes for tall, athletic blonde Barbie clones, and I don’t look like that. He’s my best friend, and I don’t want to be his chubby girl experiment before he goes back to women who are excited to go to the gym and live on lettuce leaves and kale smoothies.”
Henry laughs, then sobers. “Parker, just because he’s never dated a woman with curves before doesn’t mean you’re not his type. I’ve only ever been asked out by twinks, or guys who look like me, but I know deep down if I could find someone who looked like a real mountain man, I’d lose my mind.”
“Kind of like Anders,” I say, deliberately changing the subject.
“So have you and Danny slept together?” Henry asks, ignoring my attempts at diverting the conversation to him and Danny’s Viking teammate.
“No,” I sigh.
“Do you want to?”
Pursing my lips, I swallow down my immediate reply, and instead say. “I don’t want to ruin our friendship.”
“I get that.” Henry nods. “But sometimes risks pay off.”
“He told me he wanted me at the airport, that’s what I started to tell you the other night before him and Anders showed up.”
“He did?” Henry’s tone is part awe, part incredulity.
I nod.
“And,” he prompts me eagerly.
“He kissed me and told me to tell him I wanted him.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I didn’t say anything,” I admit.
“Why not?”
“I don’t know. I just couldn’t speak, and then he assumed I was rejecting him, and then it was too late and our flight got called and it was so awkward that neither of us mentioned it again.”
“What?” His question is more of a shriek.
“There’s more,” I admit.
“More?”
“He comes into my room.”
“He what?” His voice somehow gets even higher.
“It started the night I came here to interview with Penn and Bay. I’d accepted the job, but told him I couldn’t live with him. When he asked me why, I blurted out that I liked to play with sex toys and was a screamer.” I cringe.
Henry’s muffled laughter fills my car, and when I glance at him, his hands are covering his mouth as his shoulders shake.
“It’s all I could think of at the time. But that night, he walked in on me while I was…” I trail off, not sure how to even say what I’m about to say. “He walked in on me while I was masturbating.”
“Oh my god,” Henry rasps. “What did he do? What did you do?”
“I froze. I literally froze, I couldn’t move.”
All of his amusement has faded away, and his expression is pure sympathy and concern. “What did he do?” he asks softly.
“He came and sat down on the bed and…” My words falter, but I drag in a sharp breath, then just say it. “Then he started helping.”
“I’m going to need a little more information, because right now I think my mind might be going somewhere it shouldn’t be.”
“No, that’s probably the right direction,” I admit. “I was playing with a…dildo, and he covered my hand with his and he…helped. Then he stopped helping and started watching. Then he pushed his fingers into my mouth and told me to suck while he watched me get off on a fake cock.”
“Oh. My. God,” Henry pants.
“That’s not all.”
“What else?” he croaks.
“He’s come into my room twice more since I moved here.”
“And watched?”
“The first time, I was using a toy, and he pushed my hand away and took over. The second time, I was using my fingers, and he used his instead.”
“Oh wow,” Henry says, his tone breathy. “That’s so…”
“Weird?” I question.
“Hot,” Henry pants.
“Oh my god, it’s so hot, isn’t it?” I gasp, glad that he didn’t call me a freak, or Danny a pervert.
“So, so, so hot,” Henry agrees.
“But now I have no idea what to do,” I admit.
“What to do? You climb that man like a tree.”
“I don’t know.”
“What don’t you know? He’s coming into your room and helping you get off.”
“I know, but we don’t talk about it, and when we see each other, we don’t act like anything has happened. He doesn’t come every night, and we don’t talk. He…helps. Then he kisses me on the cheek and leaves.”
Henry makes a contemplative noise. “Okay, so that is a little odd. But he keeps coming back, right? That has to mean something.”
“It means he’s enjoying having free live porn in the room next door to his,” I snark, churlishly.
“Or he could be so desperate for you he’s just taking what he can get. He told you he wanted you. Maybe this is him showing you too.”
We chat amiably for the rest of the journey to his place, but when he directs me to a run-down apartment block in a rough-looking part of the city, I turn and look at him questioningly. “This is where you live?”
“It’s not as bad as it looks,” Henry says, his expression clearly embarrassed.
“I’m sure your place is great, but this doesn’t seem that safe an area,” I say quickly, not wanting to make it sound like I’m trying to shame him.
“It’s not the best area, but it’s what I can afford. It’s where I lived all through college, it’s fine,” Henry says, shrugging off my concern.
“You should accept the job from the Barnetts, you can stay with me and Danny, we have a spare room,” I suggest, hoping that Danny won’t mind me offering his spare room to someone he’s only met once.
“I don’t think getting in the middle of your relationship would be a great idea right now,” Henry says with a knowing smile.
“Take the job, move in with us, then we can commute to work together and you won’t have to worry about crazy rent or long bus rides.”
“Thank you for the ride, Parker,” Henry says, not agreeing as he grabs his backpack from the floor beneath his feet and opens the door.
“Think about it, I’m serious,” I call. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Have fun tonight,” he says, throwing me a playful wink as he closes the door behind him and strides quickly to the door of the building, disappearing inside.
The ride home is long and boring. In Vermont, I used to love to drive anywhere, even if it was just cruising around the streets with no destination in mind. But now that I’ve gotten used to traversing the winding mountain roads with their spectacular views twice a day, the freeway on the drive to Bozeman is monotonous and uninspiring.
I’m tired by the time I slow to a stop outside Danny’s house. It’s after eleven p.m., and I’d been expecting the house to be dark, but the lights are all on downstairs, and when I push open the front door and step inside, I’m greeted with the sounds of the TV playing and the scent of tomato and garlic.
“Hey,” I say, when I spot Danny sitting on the couch.
“I was worried, you should have called me and asked me to drive him home, or have waited for me,” he snaps, his expression angry.
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. You worked a crazy number of hours today; driving when you’re tired is dangerous.”
“I know that, I’m not stupid, but I told you I was fine. I’m perfectly capable of making a decision about my own body. If I’d have felt too tired, I’d have pulled over or not offered him a ride in the first place,” I hiss.
I expect him to bite back at me, but instead he stands up, crosses the room, and pulls me into his chest, wrapping his arms tightly around me while he exhales into the top of my head. “I was worried,” he growls into my hair. “Please don’t do this again. I’ll fix up the spare room tomorrow, then if you’re both working late, he can just stay here.”
My anger evaporates like mist as he holds me in his arms. He’s being bossy and overbearing, but he’s not doing it to be a dictator, he’s just being…nice and sweet and caring. It’s impossible for me to stay mad at him when he’s holding me like he’d be lost in a world I didn’t exist in.
“I told him he can move in with us if he takes the permanent job at the shop,” I admit into his chest.
“Okay,” Danny says without thought, reminding me again how fucking awesome he really is.
“His place is in kind of a scary area, it doesn’t seem safe,” I admit.
His arms tighten until I have to turn my cheek because he’s gripping me so closely. “If you take him home again, I’ll go with you. You do not go alone again. I’m serious, Parks. I’ll spank your ass red if you go to a dangerous part of town without me. It’s not safe for Henry either, so we’ll go pack his stuff up next week once I’m off shift and move him in with us.”
“You’ll spank me?” I laugh.
“Till your ass is cherry fucking red and you can’t sit right for a week,” he says, his tone serious without a hint of humor.
“You can’t spank me,” I say, trying and failing not to sound breathy and more excited than I’d ever admit. I’ve only ever been spanked a couple of times during sex. A quick ass slap here and there, but only ever playfully, and never with the intent of punishing me. Honestly, as much as I should absolutely hate the idea, I’m definitely not as appalled as I should be. In fact, I’m the exact opposite of appalled. But I can’t tell him that. I can never admit that the picture he’s painted, of him pulling me over his lap and spanking me until I’m red and sore, is making me really fucking wet.
“Watch me,” he growls, releasing me just enough that I can see his face and the serious intent on his expression. He isn’t bullshitting me or making an empty threat. He means exactly what he’s saying, and I have to fight the urge not to march out to my car and head for the sketchiest place I can find, just to see what he does.
Pinching my chin, he lifts my face, tipping my head back a little. “Fuck, Parks, that was supposed to be a deterrent, not an invitation to mess with me.”
I start to speak, but he releases his hold on me and steps back, not bothering to try and hide how hard his cock is, as he blatantly adjusts his erection inside his pants. “I kept your dinner warm. I know it’s late, but you need to eat,” he says, clearing his throat as he walks into the kitchen, leaving me alone, wet and desperate for him to do exactly what he just threatened me with.
Handing me a plate full of food and some silverware, he says good night and heads upstairs without looking back.