Chapter 1
One
April- Junior Year at MRU
You know that feeling when you look forward to something so much, and then it’s over and you have this sudden onset of emptiness.
Well, that’s how I feel right now, surrounded by teammates and friends who followed us to St. Louis, cheering us on as we took home the Frozen Four championship title.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m so fucking proud of my team, myself, and my coach, but I’m only sipping on my first drink of the night, and I already feel hungover from the high of the win crashing down to the reality setting in that it’s all over.
Well, at least for this season.
Trust me, I eat, sleep, and breathe hockey, but sometimes, I feel like I’m missing fulfillment somewhere else in my life. Something or someone who’d be there when all the noise fades.
My head tilts up with that thought, searching the crowd of the club we’re in.
She said she was coming.
“Why do you look so depressed, Beauty?” my teammate, Tuck, asks as he tips my hat up and plops down beside me on the couch in the section they roped off for us.
I turn my hat around backward. “I’m just taking it all in.” I shake away the thoughts, because he’s right. I should be happy, and clearly, I’m off because I’m usually a pro at masking my feelings.
Replacing my frown with a smile, I nudge him with my elbow. “And stop fucking calling me that.”
“Nah, it fits. Well, if you’d stop frowning, it would.” He smirks and takes a shot off the tray sitting in front of us, handing me the last one.
“Now drink up, Beauuutyyy.” The smartass enunciates the nickname I was given during the playoffs.
In hockey, “Beauty” or “The beautician” is an all-around good player and person. I’m honored by the new nickname, but some days, I don’t want to be the good guy.
Like when I see the tall blonde I’ve been searching for walking toward me with my group of friends.
Sometimes, I want to forget about the fact that she has a boyfriend and pretend she’s mine.
I click my shot glass with Tuck’s and toss it back, just as my roommates walk into the VIP section.
Even though I saw them right after the game, I stand up and hug them. Having them here brings me peace, and I’m finally able to shake that feeling of emptiness.
Maybe it was loneliness. I am a twin, after all… I don’t do well with being alone.
My twin rushed to the airport with our stepsister after the game. I miss them both tonight, but I’m happy as hell that they finally get to be together without holding back.
Other than my brother and me, the rest of the guys in our house play football. Since they aren’t in season, they were able to fly out with us.
Honey eyes find mine over the crowd of our friends, and just like always, every cell in my body comes alive at the sight of Shay.
Unfortunately, my view is cut short when my cousin’s big body steps up to me.
Graham hugs me the tightest, telling me how proud he is of me.
He then moves out of the way, allowing the rest of the group to say hello.
When he starts talking to the brunette who walked in with them, I realize it’s Peyton, the girl from The Howler Report.
I’ve been seeing her around more recently, especially since my stepsister, Bellamy, and her best friend, Berkley, have been making it their mission to incorporate her into our group.
I give Nola and Nate bro hugs and point Nola in the direction of the VIP bottles.
“I’m so happy for you guys,” Berkley says, moving onto her tippy toes to hug me, and I wink at Nate over her shoulder, knowing his jealous ass probably hates my hands on his girl, even in the most brotherly way.
“Sorry, Superstar. I know you’re used to being the center of attention, but tonight’s all about me,” I tease Nate and allow my eyes to find Shay’s again.
“Get your grubby hands off my woman, Mavvy,” Nate says, tugging a laughing Berkley from my arms.
Shay slowly moves in once everyone else has greeted me.
“What’s up, Point Guard?” I whisper in her ear as I pull her into a hug.
As she embraces me, I’m reminded why I have a love-hate relationship with her touch.
She always leaves me wanting more. I need to get the obsession with her out of my system.
“Told you I’d come.” She smirks up at me as she steps out of my hold.
“Color me shocked,” I tease.
Shay rolls her eyes. “Actually, I was thinking of coloring you with a big yellow ballgown and a burly beast behind you… Beauty.”
I groan. “Not you too.”
“You can thank the broadcasters for that. And the number of females there today with it written all over their signs.”
I want to ask her if that’s a hint of jealousy I hear at the end of her statement, but I know she’ll deny it. She does every time.
“Maybe they’ll start calling Cash Beast. He’ll love that.” I laugh to myself, thinking of my grumpy twin brother. “Want a drink?” I ask her as I head toward one of the bottles of vodka they have for us in the VIP section.
She hesitates, looking at her phone, but then she smiles and says, “Sure, I’ll have one of those.”
Stepping up beside me, Shay reaches into the bucket of ice and grabs a black cherry White Claw.
We each take our drinks and sit back on the couch.
Chaos surrounds us. Loud music. Packed bar.
My teammates’ boisterous voices as they attempt to flirt with the girls they’ve met.
Berkley and Nate dance on the crowded dance floor beside Nola and some random chick he must have met.
And off to the side, I spot Graham and Howler Girl taking everything in that’s below us from where they stand against the banisters.
“You good?” Shay asks, moving a little closer so I can hear her over the noise.
“Yeah, just people watching.”
“When I first spotted you earlier, before we came up, you had a weird look on your face.”
“Well, damn, now you finally tell me the truth. So I’m not a ‘Beauty’ after all.”
Shay chuckles, and the sound sends tingles through my body.
She’s like the forbidden fruit I’ll never get the chance to try. Not only is she my coach’s daughter, but she’s also in a long-term relationship with a complete douchebag.
“I just meant you seemed deep in your feels.”
“Don’t worry about me, babe. I’m good.”
Shay examines me for a second. Even though I give her a big smile, it's like she knows there’s something else lingering there. And she’s right.
Is it the crash from the high of such a monumental moment?
Or is it the fact that my grief slapped me in the face right after my win?
I think back to the moment I looked up into the stands and found my parents standing proudly together with their significant others.
At first, I was so happy, but then, like a Mack truck, it hit me that right between them should’ve been Jules.
Well, knowing her, she would’ve bum-rushed the ice to get to Cash and me.
But my baby sister would’ve been there, would’ve been here right now with us celebrating.
“You don’t have to tell me, but I hope you know how proud you should be of yourself tonight. Not going to lie, I was beaming from ear to ear with pride for my friend through the whole game.”
My stomach dips from the evident pride in her tone, and I try my best not to let the word friend ruin it for me.
I gently trace my finger over the top of her hand, where it rests on the couch between us. “I’m glad you were there.”
Our eyes meet, and her audible swallow tells me exactly what I’ve known for so long… There’s so much more between us than just friends. I’m just waiting for her to realize it.
In typical Shay fashion, she uses her phone as a crutch, tearing her eyes from mine and digging it out of the purse she has hanging on her shoulder. Tonight, more than usual, she seems to have a nervous energy about whatever it is she’s checking for.
Shay’s never told me that her boyfriend isn’t good to her, but I don’t think he treats her like she deserves to be treated.
Whenever I’ve been around them, he’s always got his eyes anywhere but on Shay, and I can’t seem to tear mine away from her.
No matter who’s around, or what’s going on, I can’t stop myself from admiring her.
Shay is stunning. She’s tall and strong, but feminine and sweet. Her long blonde hair is down tonight, but I love it when she has it pulled back in a bouncy ponytail, showing off her slender neckline.
I throw her question back at her, not liking the look I see on her face. “Are you good?”
She hesitates slightly. “Yeah, just Jordan stuff.”
I try to keep a neutral face, but my fist clenches just thinking about the way he takes her for granted.
“It’s always just Jordan stuff, isn’t it?” I can’t help but mutter.
“Come on, Mav. You can’t blame him for feeling some type of way about our friendship.”
Yeah, especially after he saw those drunk text messages a few months ago.
“I get that, but it seems to me that lately he’s putting a frown on that pretty face a little too often for my liking.”
Her cheeks pinken at my compliment. “He just gets territorial when he knows I’m going to be around you. But he’s great otherwise.”
Yeah, okay, but funny how he’s never attempted to confront me. Oh, how I wish he would.
“Alright, alright. Did Joey tell you I’m taking him to breakfast in the morning?”
A big smile takes over her face at the mention of her brother. “Only, like, fifty eleven times.”
“Did you just quote the Ying Yang Twins?”
Nodding, she burst out laughing.
“Marry me now?” I say playfully with a sigh.
Her eyes meet mine, and I see the shock in them before she recovers quickly.
“Dang, that’s all it takes for a girl to get The Maverick Leblanc to propose?”
“Old-school rap is my weakness. Mama Katie may look all sweet and innocent, but she raised us on early 2000s rap. Lots of Ying Yang twins, Lil Jon, Lil Wayne, Nappy Roots, Biggie, and Tupac. So, when I got old enough, that stuck with me.”
“You’d love my pregame playlist then.”
“You’ve been holding out, Little Moore. Text me the link to it later.”
“I don’t know, you may go to the ring store immediately.”