Chapter Four
Four
There’s something refreshing about waking up in your childhood home, especially after the end of a chaotic semester. I let out a yawn, stretching out my arms and legs, enjoying the peace and quiet of the ranch.
That thought is quickly squashed at the obnoxious sound of Gigi’s rooster, Rocky Balboa, bellowing through the air. Papaw’s yells follow immediately after, causing a big smile to spread across my face. There’s no place like home.
Papaw hates that damn bird and threatens to make a nice meal out of him one day.
But he knows Rocky’s secretly Gigi’s favorite animal at the ranch and wouldn’t dare upset her.
Hence why he’s chasing him down first thing in the morning.
Her last rooster was taken out by a coyote who’d heard his cock-a-doodle-doos one too many times.
His voice also reminds me that I agreed to help him fix up some fencing before Shay and Joey get here, so I hop out of bed, throw on a pair of sweats, and head outside.
By the time I take the Gator over to their house, Gigi’s setting down a platter of pancakes. Perfect timing.
“Mornin’,” I say to everyone at the table before walking over and kissing Gigi on the cheek and taking a seat next to Cash and Bellamy.
“It’s so nice having us all together this weekend,” Gigi says as she claps her hands together.
“Even though it’ll be short-lived, it’s great to have us all under one roof,” my dad agrees and squeezes my stepmom, Andrea’s, hand.
Family breakfast is definitely a bit different than it used to be, now that Cash and Bellamy are no longer hiding their relationship. It took the parentals some time to get used to it, but once anyone witnesses their connection, there’s no denying they’re endgame.
“Ya’ll are acting like we’re never home,” Bellamy jokes, which is a good point. Even with me taking summer classes, I’ll still be home most weekends, and Cash will be here until hockey practice starts again.
“I know, sweetheart, it’s just really nice to wake up with ya’ll here,” Andrea says with a sweet smile before adding, “Trust me, we look forward to this more than you know.”
I'm really happy my dad has found someone to make him smile again. We all are. It’s hard to open your heart to anyone, especially after suffering a loss like our family did. But over the past year, I’m finally seeing the man my dad once was before we lost Jules.
We’ve been busier than usual this past semester, especially with the team going all the way to the Frozen Four. But at the core of all of us is family, and it’s something we’ll never take for granted.
Papaw clears his throat and eyes me, urging me on to say grace before we dig in. We all bow our heads. “Dear Lord, bless this food, bless the hockey puck, and bless our ranch and its ability to help us give back.” And with that, we all dig in.
After clearing his plate in under a minute, Cash finally speaks, “What time are Shay and Joey coming?”
“She said they’d be here around 12:30, something like that,” I say casually, knowing I'm counting down the minutes until she arrives.
“We’ll get the horses ready. Is it just Joey riding?” Bellamy asks before getting up and placing her dish in the sink.
I nod, trying my best to hide my disappointment. “Yeah, I was initially thinking of taking them on one of the longer trails, but they only have a few hours today.”
I look forward to these riding sessions more than I’d like to admit.
Not only do I get such joy from helping Joey, but the time I spend with Shay away from prying eyes is priceless.
Unfortunately, they never hang around for too long.
I'm not sure if that’s intentional, but I like to think it is.
I imagine she tries to keep our one-on-one time to a minimum because she feels the same intense pull between us that I do and can only handle being alone with me for a short period of time.
Wishful thinking, I know, but hey, a guy can dream, right?
“Alright, let’s get to this fence before we fry under that sun. It’s gonna be a hot one,” Papaw says as he stands from his chair, and I do the same.
Gigi shoos us away with a dish towel in hand. “Don’t worry about the dishes. You two get going.”
“Oh, let me know when Joey’s done with his ride. I made his favorite cookies for him to take home,” she beams.
“Aw, thanks, Gigi. I’ll let you know,” I say, giving her another kiss on the cheek before following Papaw out of the kitchen.
Shay and Joey arrive at 12:30 sharp, but today Joey doesn’t want to ride… He wants to care for the horses instead.
Through the years of knowing Joey, I’ve learned he has his good days along with some rough ones.
There will be days with extreme highs along with moments of extreme lows.
Thankfully, when he’s on the ranch, working with the horses, he seems to be in the best of spirits.
But we follow his lead on what he’s comfortable with doing that day.
“I can wash them. Mav you can show me,” he says as he gathers the brush and other things scattered around the stable.
“Sure thing, buddy. Who do you want to clean up first?” I ask as I walk with him, peering into each stall.
He stops in front of June’s gate and gasps in shock. “Oh my, well, she needs a bath, for sure.”
I don’t have to look at June to know she’s probably covered in straw. It’s one of her favorite things to do for attention. She knows that if any of us see her in this state, we have to brush her and clean her up.
June knew exactly what she was doing.
“She sure does,” I say with a chuckle before grabbing her halter and lead rope. June sees her gear and whinnies in delight.
Joey’s excitement matches June’s as we head out of the stable to meet Shay. As we approach, I almost stumble over my steps at the look on her face. It’s one of pure adoration, and I have to remind myself that she’s here for her brother and his therapy sessions, not me.
“I don’t know who's more excited, June or Joey,” she says while rustling his hair.
“Do you remember what you need to do first?” I ask, standing next to a post.
Joey nods enthusiastically and holds his hand out for the rope. “I have to tie her up.” It takes him two tries to get the knot right, but when he does, he claps proudly.
“She’s all yours, buddy. I'm gonna let you take the lead. Just let me know if you need help, and I’ll be right here,” I say as I set down the hose, bucket, and sponge for him to use.
Shay remains propped up against the rails nearby, so I make my way over to her. I flick the end of her long blonde braid, and she swats at me.
“You sure he’s got this?” she asks, watching Joey thoroughly comb June’s coat.
Taking out my pack of Big Red, I offer her a piece before popping one into my mouth and smiling at her. “He sure does. That kid probably knows how to clean her better than I do.” That earns me a chuckle from her.
“You’re not wrong; he’s quite obsessed,” she says as she snaps the gum.
What I would give to taste that cinnamon on her tongue.
We stare intently as Joey combs through June’s mane with gentle precision. He’s a pro, that’s for sure.
“It’s so nice out today. Hot, but nice,” Shay says as she tilts her head up to capture the sun on her face.
I don’t respond, soaking in the opportunity to admire her.
She’s absolutely stunning. The smoothness of her tan skin, her delicate neck accentuated by the position, and the way her lips part ever-so-slightly.
I close my eyes, and for the briefest of moments, I picture her in front of me, on her knees in the same exact position.
Except in my head, her honey-brown eyes are locked on mine.
My cock twitches at the thought, but I refrain from grabbing hold of her neck and kissing her pouty lips.
“You’re awfully quiet today,” Shay calls out before she opens her eyes and directs her attention to me.
I have to clear my throat to get the words out. “Uh, yeah. Was up pretty early. Papaw needed some help mending a stretch of fence this morning.”
“I’m sure this heat didn’t help either,” Shay confirms as she wipes at her forehead. The thought of her soaking wet gives me an idea.
“Hey, next time you guys come over, keep your afternoon clear. We can go for a swim in the pond, spend the day…” I say, not feeling as confident as I usually do.
She eyes me for a minute. Shit, she’s going to say no.
“I-I mean, if you want to,” I blurt out quickly, fearing her rejection.
She laughs before easing my nerves by placing her hand on mine. “I think that’d be a lot of fun. Joey loves swimming too.”
Sheepishly swiping my hand through my newly grown-out hair, I let out a discreet sigh of relief.
“Hey, you’re getting me wet!” I hear Joey’s voice, snapping our attention back to him, where I see June shaking out her mane, effectively soaking Joey in the process.
“Whoa there, girl.” Hopping off the fence, I stride over to where June’s happily moving her head around.
I chuckle as Joey tries desperately to finish up his task. “She really likes what you're doing, buddy.”
“I wish she’d stay more still. It’s not very easy.”
I lean into him, producing an apple and placing it in his palm. “Here, give her this. Should keep her still enough for you to finish drying her.”
“That’s such a smart idea!” Joey exclaims just before feeding it to her.
I chance a glance back to where Shay remains sitting on the fencing.
She’s staring at us, and I wink before tipping my hat at her.
Making her fully aware that I caught her looking.
It wouldn’t be the first time, but that doesn’t mean a small seed of hope isn’t planted every time I do.
Within the next minute, June’s snacking away, remaining perfectly still for Joey.
“I swear, the two of you are like horse whisperers,” Shay says, her voice full of pride as she approaches us.
“I only provided the snacks. It’s my man Joey here who did all the work.” My praise has him beaming.
“I’m a pro now. Just like you, Cash, and Bellamy.”
“You sure are. I think next time maybe we’ll go out on an adventure. How’s that sound?”
“Oh, that sounds awesome! Can Shay ride too?”
“Absolutely, and afterward, we’ll go swimming. You guys can spend the day.” I know it’s not fair to tell him all this before it even happens, but he won’t let Shay back down from these plans.
After putting a well-groomed June back into her stall, we stop by Gigi’s house, where we all enjoy some cookies and milk. Before Shay and Joey have to head out, I give Joey some chicken feed to pour on the ground for Rocky Balboa, who was lingering and causing a ruckus around Gigi’s porch.
Leaning through the window of her Jeep Grand Cherokee, I confirm our next ride date.
Her phone must have auto-connected to the stereo because a loud, blaring ring sounds throughout the interior.
Peeking at her dashboard, I see Jordan’s name sprawled across the screen.
And just like that, the little bubble I’ve placed us in has vanished.
She hits ignore and turns back to me.
“You can answer that, ya know,” I say, nodding at the still illuminated dash.
“I’m good. I can call him back later.”
She avoids eye contact with me as she reaches for her sunglasses.
“I say you don’t call him back. Not when I’m in the car,” Joey says with a hint of uncharacteristic annoyance from the passenger seat.
I point at him, wagging my finger but smiling from ear to ear.
“Joey!” Shay scolds him, but she can’t hide the slight smirk on her face.
“Does he know you’re here?” I ask. It’s something I’ve always wondered, but I’ve never brought it up. I like the world we live in while they’re at the ranch. Why taint it by bringing up her douchebag of a boyfriend? But now that we’re talking about him, I need to know.
“Mav,” she starts, but doesn’t complete her thought.
“I’m well aware he doesn’t like me, and that’s fine, but I don’t want you to be in a hard spot because of it.”
“I’m here, aren’t I?” she sasses, her eyes locked onto mine.
I watch her intently. When she doesn’t shy away, I nod once. “You sure are.”
“Plus, I told him I want some space,” she says quietly. My eyebrows immediately pinch together, and my stomach flips.
“Like a break?” I ask, looking over to confirm Joey’s attention is now deep into his phone.
“No, not a break. Just enough that I don’t have to answer his every call all summer,” she says, but something in her tone makes me feel like there’s more to the story. I decide not to press her on it today; she’ll tell me when she wants to.
My hand reaches for the loose blonde strand that’s fallen across her eye and gently tuck it behind her ear. If I didn’t know any better, I’d swear she leans into the palm of my hand. But I’m an obsessed man desperately seeking any sign from her.
Maybe this space from him will show her what she really deserves.
I tap the top of her open car door twice before backing away. Giving her the okay to leave.
Joey leans over and yells out Shay’s window, “Thanks, Mav! Today was awesome.”
“Anytime, my man. Anytime.”
“I’ll see you soon, Mav,” Shay says before heading down the driveway.
I stand there long after the dust from their tires settles, long enough for me to consider texting her about how I really feel.
And then I remind myself of the last time I did that.
.. The time she gave me a glimpse of hope, only to not respond until the next day, when she told me Jordan saw the messages, and it was inappropriate since she’s in a relationship.
However, she tried to take the blame since she practically begged me to tell her.
I’m a big boy. I can handle my own consequences, which is why I always thought Jordan would confront me instead of pussyfooting around it like he did the other night.
But I keep them as a reminder that there’s curiosity swirling in that pretty blonde head of hers, one that wonders about me in a way a friend wouldn’t.
Tugging my phone from the pocket of my jeans, I find the message exchange I’ve read many times before.
Shay
Mav…Tell me.
Shay
Please
Me
I wouldn’t have let you out of my sight, I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off you, I would have begged you to leave so I could take you to my room, take that little dress off and get to know every inch of you.
Me
Every inch I have imagined more times than I should admit.
Me
But you have a boyfriend so it’s all just a fantasy. All it could ever be, right?
Shay
…