Chapter 31 Steven
STEVEN
I can hear a pin drop in the house with how quiet everyone is. What was supposed to be a nice Christmas Eve dinner has now turned into an eerie game of waiting to see who gets angry first.
With Becca just revealing to everyone that we are expecting another baby, we all watch as she and Damian celebrate the great news.
I fear that with them just coming around to the idea of her and me being together, this news might just throw a wrench in their healing process.
I don’t want a repeat of the incident outside of Tony’s, especially not in front of my son. Russell behaved when we crossed paths in the convenience store, but this may be what sends him back over the edge.
“Well,” Becca chimes up again. “What does everyone think? We didn’t exactly plan it, but it’s still good news …”
We both look between her father and mother. Marjorie has been smiling since she revealed the news. I knew she would be happy for us because she’s been on our side the entire time. I’m more worried about Russell and his track record of flying off the handle.
“I …” her mom speaks up, finally. “Becca, this is great news!” Becca lets out a sigh of relief, as do I, and we all look at Russell, waiting for him to react.
He shifts in his chair and clears his throat. “Congratulations, you guys,” he adds in. I’m sure it’s hard for him to take all this in, but I’m proud he is swallowing his pride for the sake of his daughter, grandson, and the new addition.
Even if he resents me forever, all I care about is that they are happy. It’ll hurt because Russ is like a brother to me, but I’m willing to sacrifice that for them.
Russell stands and extends his arm to shake my hand across the table. Standing as well, I take it as he congratulates me again. It surprises me, given the fact that he wanted to kill me just a week ago, but I’ll take it.
Talking to him the other day at the store, I must’ve gotten through to him. If not, he wouldn’t have shown up tonight.
“So what are your plans now?” Camilla asks Becca. “Are you going to continue working or stay home and focus on the kids?”
“I hadn’t had much time to think about that, honestly. We just found out a couple of days ago,” she replies as Damian slides off her lap and finds his own seat again.
Sitting back in my chair, I watch with a smile as Becca and her family all gush over plans for the nursery and a baby shower. Even down to guessing the gender.
“I’ll be happy if it’s healthy, but if I’m being honest, I hope it’s a girl,” Becca exclaims, and the other women agree as they start discussing all the pink clothing that will take over the house.
I’m just happy to get another chance to be the best father I can be. I know I haven’t been doing it for a long time, but being Damian’s father has already completely changed my life for the better.
“Maybe since the family is extending, this could become a new tradition,” I cut in, causing everyone to turn their attention to me this time. “Everyone can come here for holiday dinners, and we will cook for you all. How does that sound?”
“I think that’s a fine idea,” Marjorie chimes up. “It’s about time we get some normalcy in this crazy family.”
Becca starts talking about each holiday and what they can make to eat, and I rest back into my chair, just enjoying where I’m at in my life. This is the happiest I’ve ever been. I now have the woman of my dreams, my little family is growing …
Not to mention, things seem to be moving in the right direction with Russell, so maybe I’ll still have my best friend.
If only my own family were like this. I can’t wrap my head around how they can be so cruel to the people they’re supposed to love unconditionally. Seeing what family really means, it bothers me a little less that I cut ties with them.
Maybe one day, in the distant future, things will be different, but I’m not so sure I want them to be. Having them out of my life has been a huge weight off my shoulders.
Besides, I’m far from ready to forgive them after they ruined my life for so long. This is my family now …
As all the emotions run rampant inside me, I clear my throat to get everyone’s attention. If I don’t make this speech now, I may not get another chance before everyone leaves.
“I just wanted to make a toast. With everyone here in one place, I can’t begin to tell you how lucky I truly am. I love Becca and Damian with all my heart, and I can’t wait to meet our new baby. And Russell.” I turn my attention to him, hoping that it’s not too soon to include him.
“I know things got a little rocky, but I hope that you being here means that we can eventually get back to where we were in our friendship. I miss having you around, and I don’t want to lose my best friend.”
Russell smiles, although I can tell it’ll take some getting used to on his end. I have nothing but time to wait. Everyone raises their glass, even Damian with his apple juice, as we all cheers to family coming back together.
Once the speech is finished, the women begin to clear off the table and clean up the dishes. Russell pulls me aside, asking if we can step out on the porch to talk. While I’m partially skeptical, I agree and follow him outside.
The air freezes my skin instantly, but the festive decorations of my neighbors make it worth it. My block usually has the best decorations for any holiday, and Christmas is no exception.
When I first moved in, they actually won an award with the HOA.
“I’ll make it quick since it’s cold as hell out here,” Russell begins. “I just wanted a moment alone to talk about … everything.” I immediately know he’s talking about the fight, but also about me lying to him.
It wasn’t my finest moment by far, but I don’t regret a single moment. It brought us to this moment. Becca, Damian, and I are all together now, we’re happy. We are going to welcome a new child into the world.
My life is perfect. It’s all I’ve ever wanted since we started our fling five years ago.
“I’m hurt by all of this, I’m not going to lie. But seeing you all together, I don’t know.” Russell shoves his hands in his pants pockets and shrugs. “All I want is for Becca to be happy. It’s all I ever wanted. And I see now that you can provide that for her and so much more.”
Smiling, I agree with him.
“As long as you hold up to that, I accept it. I hate that you lied to me about it, but judging how I reacted, I see why you did it. Just promise there won’t be any more secrets. We’re family.”
“Of course,” I confirm. “I never meant to hurt you. But I also never meant to fall in love with her. It just happened. But now that everything is out, I promise I won’t lie to you ever again. Am I forgiven?”
He takes a deep breath and looks past me at the house across the street with the colorful lights. “Yeah. I forgive you. It just might take some time to get used to.”
I fully understand. I can’t imagine experiencing all the emotions at seeing his best friend and only child fall in love. But this is the first step in the right direction for us. Now, I can rest easy knowing that he doesn’t want to kill me.
Feeling a lot better, we head inside just in time to watch Damian tear into the Christmas presents Camilla, Russell, and Marjorie had brought for him.
We all pile onto the couch as he sits in the center of the living room, surrounded by presents and torn, green, and red wrapping paper.
“Mom, Dad. Look at this!” Damian yells out to us as he holds up a black, felt-top hat with a red ribbon wrapped where the top and the base meet. “It’s a real magician’s hat. Thank you, Grammy.”
Marjorie laughs, telling him it’s no problem at all.
The rest of the evening is filled with love and laughter, something that even when my family was still in my life, I never had before.
The holidays were always so lonely for me, unless Cameron showed up, plastered and looking for a place to sleep.
Becca and her family truly opened my eyes to what unconditional love can feel like, and I’m never going to look back at how my life used to be.
There’s only room for the future.
A future with my new family.