21. Sawyer
21
SAWYER
S tepping through the back door to the Black Crow is the last place I thought I’d be this Christmas Eve. I drop my heavy holdall from my shoulder and carry it at my side as I walk into the games room.
Christmas music plays from the band in the other room, but I’m not in any sort of festive mood. Usually I stay away from Christmas celebrations, but living with Angelica these past few days seemed to lift my spirits. Everything seems better when she’s around, like my own prescription of medicine, and having to leave her is killing me inside.
Snow melts from my boots in the bar's warmth. I need a strong drink, but I also need to ask Draven if I can borrow his sofa.
“What the fuck happened to you?” Dan says as I walk by one of the pool tables.
I stop and wonder what he’s looking at. “Need a place to crash, that’s all.”
“Your eye’s bloodshot and red like you’ve been in a fight.” He steps closer to get a better look.
I rub my finger and thumb along my nose, numb from the cold, but check it isn’t broken. “Yeah, something like that. Is Draven around?”
Dom rounds the pool table. “I thought you were staying in Colin’s cabin.”
Shane pushes the bar door open with his back, carrying a tray of drinks, his neck draped with party streamers and a red lipstick stain at the side of his mouth. His smile falters when he sees my apparent shiner. “Mate. Do I need to have a word with someone?”
That’s Shane, never off duty. “Just another shitty Christmas. Is Draven in the bar?” I say, peering through the door, the room full of people.
“Here. Looks like you need this more than I do.” Shane lifts a pint from the tray and hands it to me. “Don’t let Lilly see you with that shiner or she’ll have you in the restroom, applying all her lotions and shit. I swear she carries a first aid kit around with her.
“Is it that bad?” I press my finger against my eye socket, the flesh tender now I’m out of the cold. I lift the cool pint to my lips, wishing it was a whisky, but beggars can’t be choosers. The froth coats the hairs on my top lip while I gulp down the malty flavour, needing to catch up with the lads if I’m to be in any sort of jovial mood tonight.
“Wow, you really needed that.” Shane pats me on the back as I take a breath after drinking most of the pint in one go.
“You don’t know the half of it.” I place the pint on the ledge that runs along the wall.
“Didn’t Brenda give you a shiner like that a few years back?” Kane chuckles to himself as he leans over the pool table to pot a ball, clearly revelling because someone else’s Christmas is gonna be as miserable as his.
Shane laughs along with him. “Don’t tell me it was a woman.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “Worse. Her dad.”
Dom pushes past Dan and squeezes my shoulder as if he’s pieced it all together. “We’re gonna need a stronger drink.” He pulls out a bar stool from under the ledge and waves his hand as Poppy collects a few empty glasses.
The curvy redhead saunters over in a red Mrs. Christmas outfit. “Dom, I’m busy. I can’t keep taking time out just so you can kiss me.”
He quirks a grin. “I can’t resist you in this. You know red’s my favourite colour.” His hand smoothes over the velvet dress around her generous hip and squeezes her arse.
She rises onto her toes and kisses him.
I look away from the sickly sweet scene. Acid coating my tongue, wondering if I’ll ever be able to have a proper relationship with Angelica. Dom’s one of the lucky ones. He had the balls to keep hold of the woman he wanted, even if he locked her away in the cabin.
Shane’s another lucky bastard who’s been secretly dating his ex-wife’s sister for weeks. But as I look around the room, Kane’s pained expression resembles my own. He hasn’t been so lucky. While completely different circumstances, he’s still pining after a girl he can’t have. I know little about the lass, only that she’s half his age and he was in love with her mother before she passed almost twenty years ago now. Another tragedy in this town.
Dom comes up for air after having his tongue down Poppy’s throat. “Do us a favour, Red, and get us a round of shots.” He points a thumb in my direction. “Bulldozer here needs a strong one.”
She strokes the scruff on his jaw. “I think you’ve had enough to drink, don’t you?”
A smile quirks my lips as all the lads chide about him being under the thumb.
He smiles with a dopey grin and whispers to her, loud enough for me to hear as I sit on the bar stool next to him, “Don’t you worry about me, little fox, I can still fuck you into Christmas, even if I am a little merry.”
Her cheeks flush, matching the colour of her dress. She spins around, counting the guys with her finger. “Back in a minute.”
“If you see Draven, tell him I need a place to crash, would you?”
“He’s behind the bar. I’ll let him know you’re here.” She takes a tray of empty glasses and whisks out the door.
I lift the rest of my pint and down it in one go, slamming the glass back onto the wooden ledge. “I heard what you said, you jammy fucker.”
Dom laughs and places an arm around my shoulder. “You can talk. I knew there was something going on with you and Colin’s lass when I saw you looking for her.”
Dan straightens his spine. “You’re with Colin’s daughter?”
I don’t answer. Silence speaks louder than words and with the pained look on my face, along with the bruiser Colin gave me, I think my predicament is self-explanatory.
“Fuck.” Shane pokes his chipped tooth with his thumb. “I’m guessing Colin’s not happy about it.”
“No shit, Shane. You should get a promotion to detective with those intuitive skills. You’re wasted down at the station.” I shake my head as everyone laughs. “I’d bet money he’s not fucking happy, would you be?” She’s Colin’s world. He wants the best for her and I’m probably the worst thing that could’ve happened to her. I don’t even have anywhere to live, for fuck’s sake. I can’t blame him for wanting to protect his own. If the shoe were on the other foot, I’d do exactly the same.
Poppy returns with a tray of shots, placing them on a tall table next to the ledge I’m sat at. “Cheer up. It’s Christmas.” The lass is bonnie enough to cheer any man up with just her smile, but I’m a lost cause.
“Christmas is cancelled for me, sweetheart.”
“Why, are you on Santa’s naughty list?”
Dan chimes in, “No, just Colin’s hit list.”
I tighten my jaw and narrow my eyes as I lift a green shot from the table and knock it back. A ball of fire burns the back of my throat, incinerating the prickling tinsel that’s been lodged there.
“Easy there, tiger.” Poppy giggles as I pull a face, my eyes watering from the burn.
“Are you trying to kill me off?”
She giggles again. “It’s my own concoction.”
“It’s a chemical weapon, is what it is.” My mouth is on fire. “Tastes like regret in a glass.”
Poppy waves a dismissive hand. “I call it the hairy fairy. It’ll put hairs on your chest.”
“Sweetheart, I’m hairy enough.”
“Bulldozer, stop flirting with my woman.” Dom winks at Poppy. “She has a thing for a hairy chest.”
“What’s she doing with you then?” his brother Dan says. “You managed to grow some?”
“Very funny.” Dom hands the shots out to the rest of the lads. “Here, maybe this’ll shut you all up.”
Poppy tilts her head. “So, are you not staying at Colin’s anymore?”
“He’s been caught with his hand in the cookie jar,” Shane says.
Poppy’s green eyes widen as if she’s pieced it all together.
Dom lifts the last shot for himself. “I gotta hand it to you though, mate. You’ve got some big fucking balls to go there.”
“He’s now got two lighter balls after going there,” Shane says with a chuckle.
“Watch it or I’ll put a chip in that other tooth.”
Shane rocks back on his heels. “Poppy, get the man another drink, would you? He’s gonna need a few to lighten up.”
She collects the empty tray. “I told Draven you’re here.”
“Thanks, love.”
Shane rests a hand on my shoulder. “Don’t worry, mate. He’ll get over it. You’re not the first bloke to fall for someone’s daughter. Could be worse.”
“Just how the fuck could this situation be any worse?”
He points a thumb at Kane, who’s leaning against the ledge with his arms folded. “Look at Kane. He fell for his ex-girlfriend’s daughter, not to mention the history with the lass’s dad.”
Kane looks about as moody as I do. He pushes off the wall. “If you need a place to stay, you can kip at the farmhouse. Violet’s moved in with her uncle and cousins, so the place is all ours. Maybe we should get a sign up, the lonely hearts club .” He sign writes it in the air. “Losers and sad bastards, welcome.”
“Sounds like a blast.”
Draven walks through the bar doorway into the games room, carrying a pint in his inked hand. “Poppy said you needed this.” He slides it along the ledge. “You look like someone ran over your dog.”
I lift the pint and take a gulp, needing something to take the edge off. All the shot did was give me a serious case of acid reflux, or is that the guilt gnawing away at me? “I don’t have a dog.”
“It’s a good job, or he’d be bloody miserable having to live with you. What’s going on?” He pulls up a stool and sits his arse down. With his tall frame, he doesn’t need to climb onto it.
“Colin kicked him out for shacking up with his daughter,” Dan says.
Draven flinches his head back with wide eyes. “Well, fuck me. I never thought you had the balls to do it.” He shakes his head with a chuckle. “You’ve been mooning over the lass since she was old enough to date. I’ve seen how protective you are of her.”
I nurse my pint, staring into the amber liquid as if it holds all the answers to my problems. “It seems I have the balls, but nowhere to live.”
“The spare room’s yours, mate.” He squeezes my shoulder. “Colin’ll come around. You should be fucking celebrating instead of moping. You just bagged yourself a girl… how old is she?” Draven looks around at the guys for an answer when I stay silent.
“I dunno how old she is, but Sawyer’s definitely punching above his weight. She’s too sweet for you,” Dan says.
I knock back another drink and slam the glass on the table. “Why do I come here?”
“Because you’re too tight to pay for a hotel.” Draven pushes off the stool and pats my shoulder with a laugh.
The back door swings open, letting in the cold. The voice of an angel says, “Is Sawyer here?”
I look up from my stupor. “Angelica?”