Chapter 3
Chapter Three
His hands around my neck, squeezing so hard. There was so much pressure behind my eyes, and I kept trying to inhale only to meet a wall.
He was killing me. I knew I should fight. I should claw and smack him. Do anything to try and stop him. Instead, I just lay there staring past him at the white ceiling, ready for it to be over.
Just as I felt myself slipping away, I heard Mother’s voice. “Don’t kill her.”
My eyes shot open to another, unfamiliar white ceiling. I felt disoriented. Before I even thought to look around, I hoarsely called out for Roe. It was a little easier to talk. It still hurt, but it was bearable.
“He went home,” said Bram’s deep, tired voice. “Along with Wyatt.”
I turned my head toward him. Bram was sitting in a wood and brown leather armchair next to the bed. He looked as tired as he sounded. There was a blanket draped over his shoulders; he must have been sitting with me for quite a while.
They left me here.
I had known disappointment and loneliness all my life. I should have been used to them, but right now they felt too heavy to bear.
“Are you upset they’re not here?” Bram asked, making me wonder if I had let my feelings show.
I relaxed my face so it revealed nothing. “I’m used to being on my own.”
Bram frowned. “You’re not alone.”
“I don’t know you,” I said bluntly. “Not really.”
Bram glanced past me for a split second before returning his attention to me. “Your boyfriend argued the same thing when I told him to go home.”
I had a feeling he was talking about Roe.
“They refused to leave you,” Bram grumbled and nodded toward the other side of the bed. “The only reason they agreed to go home was because Reid said he’d stay here with you.”
I turned my head and saw Reid asleep in a chair identical to Bram’s. His feet were propped up on the foot of the bed, and he was covered with a soft-looking blue blanket from the shoulders down.
“Despite the circumstances, his mother is happy that he’s here. She tried to get him to sleep on the couch in the living room, where it’d be more comfortable, but he refused,” Bram explained.
I glanced around the room. It looked like I was in a guest room with how plain and bare it was.
The queen-sized bed I was in had a black metal frame and white bedding.
A round, black side table with a lamp on it stood next to the bed.
Across the room was a TV hanging on the wall and on either side of it were doors.
One seemed to lead to a bathroom and the other I assumed led to the rest of the house.
The chairs Bram and Reid were using looked out of place, which made me think that they’d been brought in from somewhere else.
“Do you need anything?” Bram asked.
I went to touch my sore throat, and I saw that my hand and some of my fingers were bandaged. I set my hand back on the bed. “I’m thirsty.”
Bram stood. “I’ll get you some water.”
As he left the room, I had the urge to look at the time, only to realize I didn’t have my phone.
I didn’t have anything that was mine. Not even my own clothes.
I glanced down to see if I was still in the outfit Mac had lent me to wear to the club’s barbecue and saw that I wasn’t.
Lifting the covers, I saw that the crop top and shorts had been replaced with a baggy oversized shirt and sweatpants.
I didn’t want to think about how I’d been changed.
The next urge that hit me was the need to pee.
I pushed the covers down as far as I could reach and used my feet to get them the rest of the way.
That movement alone made me very aware that my pain medication had fully worn off.
Doing my best not to wake Reid, I rolled onto my side and sat up.
I paused a second to take in a few shallow breaths before slowly standing.
I wrapped an arm around myself under my breasts.
It didn’t do anything to lessen the pain, but it was a little bit comforting.
After taking a couple of wobbly steps, I put my hand on the back of Bram’s chair to help me.
When I was past the chair, I reached out for the foot of the bed.
It wasn’t far to the bathroom from there. Just five to six steps of empty space.
I took one wobbly step, then another. With the next, I stumbled. I braced, knowing I was going down.
A hand caught me by my upper arm and a tattooed arm wrapped around my lower stomach before someone pressed against me from behind. They held me as I got my feet flat on the ground.
“Want me to carry you?” a tired voice asked.
Reid.
There was this knee-jerk urge to turn him down.
Everything about him right now was confusing.
I was angry that he’d known about my connection with Bram the whole time.
I still didn’t have a clear answer as to why he didn’t like me.
I hated how he had assumed that just because he’d gotten Bram and me in the same place and revealed that Bram was my real father, I would tell Bram every fucking ugly detail about my life.
When I hadn’t, he’d stormed off, disappointed and pissed.
A few hours later, he’d showed up to my house and helped me.
Now he was here, staying with me so I wouldn’t wake up alone in a strange place with a father I had only learned about a few weeks ago.
Should I thank him? Call him an asshole?
His hand left my arm and he grasped my chin gently with his fingers. The same fingers that had been inside me not so long ago, making me moan and beg him not to stop. He’d acted like he hated everything about that moment, yet he’d come just as hard on my hand as I had his.
He turned my head slightly so we could see each other. “If it hurts to talk, you can nod.”
My brain must have short-circuited, because I nodded.
Accepting that as an answer, Reid scooped me up in his arms, making me hiss.
“Bobby left you pain meds,” he said as he carried me into the bathroom. He used his elbow to flip on the light.
The brightness stung my eyes. Involuntarily, I tried to shield my face in his neck.
If it bothered him, he didn’t say. He didn’t say a word when I felt him stop walking, either.
He just held me. I pulled away with squinted eyes and saw that we were by the toilet.
I hadn’t said why I was headed to the bathroom, but I guessed the reason was obvious.
With my eyes still adjusting to the brightness, I leaned away until I was able to see Reid’s face.
He stared back at me with a schooled expression. “You ready?”
I nodded and he gently set me on my feet.
“You don’t need help in here, do you?” he teased.
I gave him a not-so-nice look.
As he turned to leave, I could have sworn the corner of his mouth twitched.
“Why did you stay with me?” I blurted.
He paused at the door and glanced back at me.
“You were sleeping, you were safe, everyone was exhausted, and Bram wanted everybody to go home. Because my best friends are dumbasses, they refused to leave you. Bram was moments away from tossing them out of the house. To avoid all that, I offered to stay. It was obvious Bram wasn’t happy about it, but he couldn’t force me to leave without pissing my mom off. ”
He’d stayed with me for Roe and Wyatt. Not because he wanted to. I shouldn’t have been surprised. I really shouldn’t. Yet I was still disappointed.
I’m such a problem to be handled.
“I’ll be right outside.” He left and closed the door behind him.
Moving slowly, I used the toilet and made my way over to the sink.
The bathroom had more color than the bedroom and appeared newly renovated.
The walls were sage green and the white tiles on the floor were hexagonal.
The vanity was white oak with a solid white marble countertop and sink.
I wondered if Bram’s wife, Vivian, had picked everything out.
I could only wash the hand that wasn’t bandaged.
As I did, I made the mistake of glancing in the white-oak-framed mirror above the sink.
My lip was split, but that was from when Donnie had hit me at the club’s barbecue.
One side of my face, from my chin to just below my eye, was swollen and bruised and had tiny cuts.
My neck was covered in purple and black blotches.
After drying my hand, I lifted the baggy shirt to reveal my stomach.
I only took a quick glance before I let my shirt drop back in place.
The memories of every punch and kick kept popping up behind my eyes, making me wince and shake my head in an attempt to distort what my mind was forcing me to see.
“It’s just another fucking day,” I whispered with closed eyes.
Don’t cry.
“It’s just another—” My already hoarse voice cracked, and I had to stare up at the ceiling to help will away the tears that threatened to fall.
I couldn’t cry. Because once I started, I wouldn’t be able to stop.
I was already fucking low. Probably the lowest I had ever been.
I hadn’t expected to be here dealing with this anymore.
So I could not cry. Not if I was going to pull myself up and make the climb I wasn’t sure I even wanted to make.
A climb that would put me in a mental state of caring about tomorrow—of wanting to see it.
I closed my eyes again and took a minute to breathe. When I was calmer, I whispered one more time, “It’s just another fucking day.”
Once I was calm enough, I made my way out of the bathroom. Just as I stepped out, I saw Reid leaning against the wall next to the bathroom door and Bram once again sitting in his chair.
I wished Roe or Wyatt were here.
Reid pushed off the wall. “I can carry you.”
“I prefer to walk,” I said as I continued. It was at a snail’s pace, painful, and my legs felt like they’d give out at any second.
“Why are you choosing to do things the hard way?” Reid asked, following me and looking ready to catch me if I fell.
“I’m fine,” I insisted. I didn’t want to be something he had to deal with.