Chapter 13
13
STEPHANIE
Three hours later, they were pulling off the highway onto the lanes leading into the airport. Stephanie could not put this feeling in the pit of her stomach into words. She felt torn, slightly alarmed, sad, and confused because she never really expected to get along with Lance this weekend – and she truly was coming to adore the ostentatious man.
Sure, they were married – but barely. Of course, she was attracted to him; she had been since the very beginning. There was something more budding between them, and she was very aware of that difference, whether he knew it or not. He was treating her differently, and it was clear. The looks he tossed her way had an unspoken fondness to his eyes, combined with the fact that he seemed to be treasuring the fact that he was going to be the father of her child.
After all – he dubbed the little bubbly-squishy-looking blob on the sonogram ‘Peanut’ and nearly cried when she showed it to him an hour ago. He took several pictures of the sonogram with his cell phone, proudly texting it to his family along with a photo of the two of them. They actually took a photo – as a couple. It was her new lock screen on her phone.
“Do you wanna come in?” he asked quietly as she pulled up to the departures gate. The fact that he asked, surprised her, only to see him hesitate. “Actually, no. I would rather you remain in the car where you are safe. Let’s just park for a moment and say our goodbyes.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.”
Circling back around the airport, she pulled into the parking garage for departing flights and pulled into a spot. The moment she put the car into park, Lance reached over and unbuckled her, tugging her toward him across the seat bodily with a playful look on his face. A nervous laugh bubbled up within her as he rolled his eyes, tugging her directly into his lap.
“Get over here…”
“Lance!” she hissed, looking around and laughing. “People are gonna think the worst with me sitting on your lap like this.”
“Mannnn, I wish there was time for ‘ the worst,’ ” he groaned openly, closing his eyes as he shivered, wrapping his arms around her tightly in a hug. “This visit was about us talking, getting to know each other, and working out a few things… and as much as I wish we could have spent the entire weekend in bed, I’m glad we didn’t,” he admitted and then chuckled. “I never thought I would say those words aloud.”
She laughed softly and cradled his head against her throat, softly stroking his hair as he sighed in contentment. Yeah, she had to agree with him that this weekend had been anything but what either had imagined. When he said, ‘ I’ll be there in two hours,’ she assumed he was coming for a fight, to demand a divorce, ask for an abortion, or would try to make the moves on her.
Lance had done the exact opposite. He insisted they were married, fretted over her and the baby, and treated her like she mattered. He never once made the moves on her, even though he had the opportunity. Instead, he took that chance to make sure they would turn to each other as friends along this strange road they were on, offering to make a home and be the father of their child. He wanted to provide, to be involved, and it was wonderfully sweet.
He breathed against her throat, nuzzling it, and sighed again.
“I hope you know I’m going to spam your email with all sorts of apartments for us to talk about,” he whispered softly, dropping a kiss at the base of her throat.
“I have no doubt,” she murmured, kissing the top of his head. “I like hugging like this.”
“We’ve gotta hug more.”
“I agree.”
They both got quiet, listening to the sounds of cars driving past mixed with the occasional roar of an airplane. He pulled back slightly, looking up at her, his eyes searching and full of emotion, right before he arched up toward her. He hesitated, his lips so close to hers that she could feel his breath as he whispered her name with such longing that she immediately responded without a second thought.
Lance dragged his lower lip against hers, almost as if he was teasing her with a silent promise of more. Her breath caught in her chest as she immediately got flashbacks of their night together. He lived for taking his sweet time, excelled at coaxing a breathless moan out of her, and took the deepest pleasure in the way she responded to him.
This was no different.
“Oh princess,” he breathed, kissing her once more, almost as a tease as she responded. Her fingers combed through his hair, cradling his head, as if to silently beg him to focus and quit playing around, only to hear that confident, knowing chuckle from a man who knows how to make his woman crave more – and gave it to her.
He released her from his hold, sliding his hands up her back and hooking his fingers over her shoulders, keeping her close to him, pulling her into his web, and she was ready. If he was the spider, she was the fly just happily waiting to be devoured alive.
And he did - Lance could kiss!
He opened his mouth against hers, angling slightly, as he kissed her deeply, tasting her like a man tasting water in the middle of the desert. He drank deeply, his tongue sliding against hers as he held her close. She knew why, too – he was trying to make sure he left a mark before disappearing from her life. They both knew it could be a few weeks or a few months before they saw each other again, and the separation could be really difficult to handle.
“I’m gonna miss you,” he whispered huskily against her lips. “Take care of yourself and our baby.”
“I promise,” she breathed tearfully, touching his lip with the pad of her thumb, needing to memorize the softness and feeling of them. “Don’t be a stranger this time around – call, email, or text me.”
“I swear I will, princess. Trust me to be the man you need…”
“I will miss you already,” she admitted, knowing she was opening herself up to him, trusting him to be just as deeply and emotionally involved in whatever this was. He told her it wasn’t love, but there was obviously a bond between them, brought together by the life they’d created by mistake during a single night of passion.
“I’m gonna miss the both of you,” he replied gruffly, nodding and looking away from her… only to lean back slightly and yank up her shirt without warning. She immediately balked, pushing it back down in shock.
“Lance!”
“What?” he said, glancing at her – and she froze seeing the tears in his eyes. “I’m kissing my baby goodbye.”
And did.
He’d untucked her shirt from her hands where she was clenching the material, exposing her midriff, and latched his hands under her arms like she weighed nothing, lifting her a few inches off his lap before dropping a kiss just above her belly button. It was strangely awkward. She had her head angled against the headliner in the car, and was about to burst out laughing at his crazy antics, only to hear his broken voice.
“You be good in there for Daddy, okay? Make sure Mama feeds you and grow really strong for us. When I get back, I’m gonna give you another kiss, Peanut, and rub that belly to say ‘hello,’” and he kissed Stephanie’s tummy again as he whispered a soft ‘I love you’ against her skin.
That single moment, that unexpected treasure, was something she would never forget – and she kissed him again as he lowered her, pouring all of those unidentified emotions within her into that single kiss. They were both clinging to each other, sniffing back tears, and knew time was slipping away when Lance pulled back and grabbed a used Sonic napkin from the pocket of the door to wipe his eyes as he smiled and looked at her.
“When you meet my buddies again, this never happened,” he said gruffly.
“You mean blubbering emotionally and unsure what this is but loving every second of it?” she wept, reaching for a napkin in the center console to wipe her own eyes – and heard his soft laugh.
“Exactly.”
“Want a fresh napkin?”
“Nah I’m good. So long as I don’t get picante in my eye or something – I’ll live. Hey, maybe I can blame the tears on that?”
“Oh, absolutely. Picante or pepper is a very good excuse,” she retorted thickly as they shared a tearful smile before leaning toward each other again for a soft, tender kiss… one that actually meant goodbye.
“Be safe going home,” he whispered, touching her cheek. “Take care of yourself and our peanut.”
“I will,” she promised, her hand mirroring his as she touched his face. “Be safe and text me when you get back to the ship.”
“I promise. I’m gonna go straight to a computer and start spamming you with apartments in the area.”
“I never said ‘yes,’ but I’ll look and will be waiting for those emails.”
“Go ahead and head home. Text me when you get there so I don’t worry.” Lance pressed his forehead against hers, drew in a deep breath, and then nodded, brushing a light kiss onto the tip of her nose – before yanking open his car door. He grabbed his backpack and stood up, met her gaze, and nodded tightly.
Neither spoke .
She saw his throat work as he raised a hand silently – and she saw the napkin in his hand. She smiled tearfully and saw his smirk as he shrugged before shoving the napkin in his jeans pocket. He turned and walked away, crossing and disappearing into the airport.
Sitting there, she just stared at the space where he once was, almost in shock and slightly horrified that he was gone.
Just gone, like nothing had ever happened, yet she knew better.
She gasped as she felt the first faint flutter gently in her lower belly and broke. Hot tears ran down her cheeks, unchecked in awareness and grief. She felt the baby move – and he wasn’t here to share this with her. Their sweet peanut was aware that something was wrong and making its presence known. She let out a painful wail in the silence of the car where no one could hear her, pressing her hand on her lower abdomen, waiting and hoping it would happen again.
“Story of my life,” she wept, talking to the baby. “Scared to put myself out there and take a chance… and now it’s too late. Well, not anymore, Peanut. You and me, we’re going to change a few things and grab at happiness with both hands from here on out.”
Thirty minutes later, she walked in the door to her apartment and dropped her purse on the table. There was silence, and the place felt empty. She missed his presence, missed even the little spats between them, the way he looked at her – all of it.
Pulling out her cell phone, she hesitated. Looking at the old type stamps that were on the display shelf on the wall for décor, and her breath caught. It no longer said ‘Wood’ in the center. It said ‘Cavanaugh’ in all sorts of fonts, in varying sizes, and there was a heart beside the name. She took a picture of it and texted it to Lance to let him know she was here – and that she knew what he had done.
I’m here, and you’re not.
Only to see three dots appear on the screen.
We’re gonna fix that – don’t worry. I’m boarding the plane now; just don’t give up on me and feed my Peanut again ??
Will do. She wants Doritos and blue cheese.
Then, give my son what he wants. LOL. I’ll text when I get to the ship, feed my boy, and tell him to behave.
I will. Talk to you soon.
Two hours – and get ready for the emails.