20. Axel
20
AXEL
A xel couldn’t help smiling inside and out the next day as he and Jack sang their heads off in the horse drawn carriage at the Hometown Holiday Celebration.
If there was a better time and place to sing “Jingle Bells,” Axel definitely couldn’t think of it. And he clearly wasn’t the only one enjoying himself. Jack looked happy enough to float away as his little chest puffed out to suck in breaths between the lyrics.
Eden sat on the other side of Jack, her cheeks flushed, looking a little amused and a little embarrassed at the two of them. It made Axel feel a bit like a boy himself again, with his mom rolling her eyes while he and his dad and brother carried on, knowing that she secretly enjoyed every minute of whatever they were doing.
He’d even caught Eden sneaking a photo of them when she thought he wasn’t looking.
The three of them had enjoyed an unbelievable morning so far, walking around town, trying out all the homemade treats at the charity booths, and participating in every activity that caught Jack’s eye. They’d also stopped to chat with all of Jack’s friends and their parents.
And Axel couldn’t help enjoying the looks of approval they were getting. Sure, a small town might be gossipy, but folks weren’t shy about letting their opinions be known. And if they liked what they saw, there was no better feeling in the world than when they let you know it with a smile or a nod.
Axel had suspected last night that inviting Eden to something where Jack was included might be okay with her, as long as she didn’t mind people knowing they were out together. He wanted to be very serious about this thing they had going, and he felt instinctively that it wasn’t right to leave Jack out of anything more than what was absolutely necessary for Eden to get to know Axel on her own.
But he’d seen in her eyes last night that it wasn’t just okay. Including Jack meant something to her. And even now, when she was a little embarrassed, she was also happier than he’d ever seen her.
This is it, a little voice kept singing out in the back of his head. This is it.
Axel had never exactly been a great boyfriend. He’d had girlfriends here and there back in school, but he’d never been attuned to them in this way—he’d never felt so motivated to see someone else smile, or to try and think about what they might like best in a given situation.
Maybe he could mention it to the guys tonight. The veterans’ group chat had lit up last night with everyone wanting to meet up tonight at the local pub they all called the Barrel. Axel hadn’t been planning on going, but suddenly he felt like time with his buddies might be just the thing.
“Now, I may be biased,” Joe Cassidy said from where he sat up front, holding the reins as the horses pulled them back onto Park Avenue. “But I think you three might have been my favorite passengers all day.”
“ Hooray ,” Axel yelled, and Jack joined in.
Eden laughed at that and clapped for them.
“Here we are,” Joe told them, spryly leaping off his perch, and coming down to help Eden to the sidewalk, followed by Jack.
“Thank you,” Eden said.
“She’s a keeper,” he murmured as Axel hopped down to join them.
Axel felt a wave of gratitude like nothing he had ever experienced.
“Hey, someone’s got the Christmas spirit,” Axel’s brother, Tanner called out, jogging up from across the street with his son, Zeke, and new wife, Valentina in tow.
Axel had to smile as he watched them approach—Tanner looking so madly in love with the girl with the long, dark hair. And Valentina’s eyes on Zeke, like she wouldn’t let the boy out of her sight for anything.
Do we look like that?
“Good to see you here, man,” Tanner said, shaking Axel’s hand and pulling him in for a one-armed hug and a slap on the back.
“Eden, this is my brother, Tanner, his wife, Valentina, and my nephew, Zeke,” Axel said. “Guys, this is Eden, and this is Jack.”
“I know you,” Zeke said immediately to Jack. “You’re in the other class.”
“I know you from recess,” Jack said. “You’re in third grade too.”
The boys started talking about school, and Axel turned back to see Eden and Valentina were already chatting about the community market.
“I can’t believe you’re the Valentina,” Eden was saying. “What a wonderful thing you’ve done with that space.”
“It’s a work in progress,” Valentina said with a smile. Axel’s sister-in-law was as humble as her work was impressive.
“We’re very proud of it,” Tanner said, winking at Valentina. “But don’t let her fool you. This lady rarely takes a day off.”
“Speaking of which,” Valentina said. “We should probably run. We have to meet a merchant up at the market, and we want to make it back down in time for the caroling. Will we see you there?”
Eden glanced over at Axel, and he nodded.
“You can count on it,” he told them.
“See you later,” Zeke said to Jack.
Jack waved back at him as the three headed down Park, presumably to Tanner’s truck.
“He’s your nephew,” Jack said in astonishment to Axel. “I didn’t know you had a nephew at my school.”
“Maybe you two will be in the same fourth-grade class next year,” Axel told him. “Zeke’s a really great kid. I’ll bet you guys would be good friends. ”
Jack looked so pleased that Axel felt a pang in his heart.
What’s happening to me?
“I know you need to volunteer soon,” Eden said. “And Jack and I wanted to buy a Christmas tree today anyway, so we can walk you over.”
“I still have a few minutes,” Axel said. “Why don’t I help you pick a good one before I get started?”
“That’s a great idea,” Eden told Jack. “Axel is an expert because he sells the Christmas trees for the firehouse with the other firefighters.”
“You’re a firefighter , Coach?” Jack asked, incredulous.
“Only a volunteer,” Axel said. “And not since I was in high school. But yes, I’m hoping I can volunteer there again when the flag football unit is done at your school.”
“What about our club?” Jack asked worriedly.
“We can still have our club,” Axel told him. “I can do both.”
“ If the school says yes and we get the other things done we’ll need to do,” Eden added. “The football club isn’t a sure thing just yet, even though everyone knocked it out of the park with the candy sales.”
Axel kept meaning to ask her what else had to be done, but they were always in the middle of something. He hoped that she would bend his ear about it soon if she needed anything from him.
They walked across the street to where the firefighters were gathered on the lawn between the library and church, selling cut trees that had been donated by Cassidy Farm.
The snowy grass had been trampled by countless little feet, and children were dashing around between the rows of trees, squealing with delight as their grownups debated the choices. The scent of pine needles was sweet in the air, and Axel was instantly awash in childhood memories of chasing Tanner around those trees himself.
“I know that girl,” Jack said suddenly. “Mom, can I go play?”
“Sure,” Eden told him. “Stay in the trees, and come when I call you.”
“Okay,” Jack said, grinning up at her and then darting off.
“He’s so awesome,” Axel said, shaking his head. “When I was his age, I would have been gone before you could yell my name.”
“I worry that it’s because he’s protective of me,” Eden said, pressing her lips together afterward, as if she hadn’t meant to admit that.
“No,” Axel said, stopping to take her hand, and feeling awful if what he’d said made her feel bad in any way. “You’re an amazing mother, and he’s a well-behaved kid. You should be so proud of Jack.”
“Thank you,” she said, gazing up at him, her eyes glimmering with unshed tears like two blue jewels in a clear pool. “I try my best.”
“That’s all any of us can do,” Axel told her. “Human beings aren’t perfect. I know I’m not.”
She looked away, but not before he saw a little smile tugging up the corners of her mouth.
“What’s this?” he teased her quietly. “Are you smiling at me for saying I’m not perfect? Or do you think I’m perfect, Eden Wilder? ”
“Let’s go look at trees,” she said, really smiling now.
They began searching in earnest, looking over the different types and sizes until they found three good options.
“Which one?” Eden asked, frowning.
“Let’s let Jack decide,” Axel said. “All three are good, and I’ll bet he’d like to weigh in.”
“That’s a great idea,” Eden said.
Axel watched while she called Jack’s name, and was pleased to see the boy dash up a moment later, his cheeks pink from running and his blue eyes twinkling, just like his mother’s.
“I’ll be right back,” he told Eden, jogging off to grab one of his buddies so he could pay for her tree and arrange delivery.
He didn’t exactly think that she needed the help, but he knew schoolteachers weren’t paid as well as they should be, and it felt like a much nicer gesture today than buying her flowers, since Jack would enjoy this gift too.
Ashton Beck, an old friend from school, took his payment and winked at him knowingly. There was someone else waiting, so Axel didn’t stop to chat.
When he got back, he saw that Jack was taking his job as the tree chooser very seriously. After much debate, both out loud with himself, and silently as he nodded and compared, he finally chose the smallest tree with the best shape.
“That’s a really good one,” Eden told him.
“It’s just right for our house,” Jack said, nodding seriously. “Not too big, but there’s still lots of room for presents. Plus, it looks like the ones in the movies. ”
“It does look like a Christmas movie tree,” Eden agreed with a smile. “Can you stay here with Coach for a minute while I go let them know we want this one?”
“Okay,” Jack said.
She headed over to Ashton Beck, which meant Axel could relax since Ashton wouldn’t accidentally let her pay twice.
“Thank you so much for hanging out with me today,” Axel told Jack.
“It was fun,” Jack said. “My mom says she’s getting to know you better.”
“She does, huh?” Axel chuckled. “Well, I’m getting to know her better too, and I think she’s the nicest lady in town.”
Jack nodded his head up and down hard.
“Is it okay with you if I keep getting to know her, Jack?” Axel asked, crouching so the boy would see he meant what he was asking. “It’s okay to say so if you just want your mom all to yourself.”
Jack frowned as if in deep consideration, and Axel braced himself, knowing he would live with whatever the boy decided. He couldn’t be important in Eden’s life if it made Jack sad—that would never work.
“She has a special smile when we’re with you,” Jack said thoughtfully after a second. “You should definitely keep getting to know her.”
“Really?” Axel asked, gratified that the boy had decided about him a little faster than the Christmas tree.
“Definitely,” Jack repeated, laughing.
“Axel Williams.” Eden’s voice was admonishing as she marched back down the row of trees. “Did you pay for our Christmas tree?”
“I forgot to buy you flowers,” he said, winking at Jack. “I hoped a tree might be almost as nice.”
“It’s way better,” Jack crowed, letting his head fall back with a real belly laugh.
Eden’s chilly expression melted at her son’s happiness.
“I’m sorry if I overstepped,” Axel said quietly. “I know you can buy your own. I’m just an old-fashioned guy, and I wanted a way to say thank you for today.”
“It’s okay this time,” she teased him with a little smile that made him want to pull her close and kiss her even more than he’d wanted to last night.
“Come to family dinner with me tomorrow at the homestead,” he said quickly, before he could chicken out. “Everyone wants to meet you two.”
“All the other kids already went there,” Jack said excitedly, before Eden could say a word. “It was a school trip. There are horses and all kinds of cool stuff.”
“We’d love to,” Eden said, smiling up at him.
“I’ll pick you up at five, if that’s okay,” he told her.
She nodded, and he reached out and squeezed her hand, fighting the urge to lift her in his arms and spin her around.
“See you tomorrow, Jackrabbit,” he told Jack.
“Bye, Coach,” Jack said, giving him a wave before he followed his mother down Park Avenue.
And as they walked away, Axel had a strange sensation for a moment, like his heart was being pulled out of his body.