Chapter 13 Kit
Kit
Penny’s condition improved over our days of travel back to Ashpoint.
Three nights spent curled together under cloaks and furs to stave off the cold meant we both slept better than usual—despite the lack of a comfortable bed—which certainly helped.
He only woke himself up coughing a handful of times, and he proved quite adept at soothing me back to sleep after my nightmares that seemed less frequent with him so close.
It was amazing how quickly I'd grown accustomed to his affections and how readily I gave mine. He was everything I'd said. Kind, gentle, and easy to care for. I was fond of him, terribly so, and memories of my life before he came into it were bland and gray.
In our days on the road, especially on the return trip since I was no longer fretting over his health, I'd learned the smell of him and the feel of his body so often pressed against mine.
I'd studied the scars on his hands and the freckles on his cheeks.
I thought I knew his face as well as I knew my own.
Part of me was afraid of relying on him even more than I already did. That didn’t stop me from enjoying it while it lasted.
On the fourth morning, with only a few hours’ travel left ahead of us, we picked away at the last of the jerky while huddling together under our blankets.
Penny was back to his usual chattery self, going on about how excited he was to see how big Rosie’s kittens had gotten in the week we were away, and about how glad he’d be to see Thoma and Reimond and to sleep in a real bed again.
But my mind was elsewhere. In a few hours, I’d be face to face with Levitt, and I wasn’t sure how to feel about that. It was easier before I knew he supposedly loved me, before I knew he’d come looking for me but never bothered to find me. Before I had to wonder how he felt now.
Penny paused in whatever he was saying to take a bite of jerky, and I tipped my head back against my pack to watch the low gray clouds rush by ahead of the chill breeze.
“You asked what Nora told me when she pulled me away,” I said, no surer that I should tell Penny any of this now than I had been at the mission.
I felt his eyes on me, but I didn’t wait for him to respond before I continued.
“She said you and I seemed close, and that she was glad to see me with someone, but you weren’t who she expected. ”
“What do you mean?” he asked as he tucked himself under my arm.
“When I escaped Ashpoint, Levitt showed up at the mission looking for me after I’d already moved on.”
Penny pushed himself up, and his brow furrowed. “What?”
I sighed. “She told him where to find me, but he never came.”
The distance between us continued to grow as Penny swiveled to face me directly. “Why would he come after you? He doesn’t strike me as the rebellious sort.”
My stomach churned at the thought of what Nora told me, and attempting to say it out loud proved more difficult than I thought it would be. Quiet stretched for several long moments until I found my voice.
“It had always been the plan to run together if we got the chance, or to meet in Emberstead if we couldn’t both get out at the same time. And… Nora said he told her that he loved me.”
It was Penny’s turn to fall silent. His expression went blank enough that I wasn’t sure he was thinking at all.
“Oh,” he said after several long moments.
I waited for a stronger reaction, but he remained wordless and distant for what felt like an eternity before asking, “Were you two very close?”
I shrugged. “Levitt was my best friend. He was one of the few people in Ashpoint who didn’t see me as a grand disappointment or something to use for their own gain.”
“But he never told you he loved you?”
I shook my head. “I had no idea.”
Penny sank beside me, close but not touching, and the space between us felt vaster than a few inches.
“Has he said anything? Since you’ve been back?” he asked, but I could tell that wasn’t the question he wanted an answer to.
“Not a word,” I replied. “Not about any of it.”
Penny nodded while looking anywhere but at me. “Oh,” he repeated.
He seemed to be taking the news about as well as I had, and I didn’t want him worrying about things that would never be. Levitt was a friend at most. Any chance we had of being more than that was long gone.
Penny pressed against my side again and threaded his fingers through mine. “He shouldn’t have given up. I wouldn’t have. I’d follow you anywhere.”
A smile tugged at my lips, and I leaned my head against his. It was the reassurance I’d wanted back at the mission but hadn’t known how to ask for.
“What would you do if he told you now?” Penny asked softly.
“It wouldn’t matter. There’s a part of me that wishes that he had said something then. Maybe it would have made me feel less alone, or less like there was something wrong with me, but… it was for the best that he didn’t. Because I have you, and I’m happy, Pen.”
His grip on my fingers tightened, and I tipped his chin up with my free hand for a kiss. That earned me a wide smile.
“Besides,” I added, “I’m not sure Levitt and I have as much in common as we used to when we were kids. Not as much as you and I do, anyway.”
That seemed to ease Penny’s worry, and we fell into idle chatter as we finished the last of the jerky.
We managed to stay wrapped up in the cloaks and furs as we moved from the bed of the cart to the driver’s bench.
Penny spent the first few hours of the trip tucked under my arm with his head on my shoulder.
When we turned off the main road and started on the path into the foothills, I reluctantly withdrew my arm and put a few inches of space between us.
Penny took the opportunity to move into the bed of the cart, claiming he could better lay out his sketchbook for drawing, but I could tell he hated my need for secrecy.
The path narrowed and grew rougher as we got closer to Ashpoint, and when the sheer stone cliff rose to our right, I scanned the rocky outcroppings above for lookouts.
“Gate’s just ahead,” I called back to Penny. “Nice not getting ambushed this time, don’t you think?”
The scuffle of him rifling through his pack paused when I spoke.
“Yeah.” He sounded distracted. “Very nice.”
“You going to come up here?”
“Sure,” he said. The rustling stopped, but he didn’t immediately join me on the bench.
I started to turn toward him as he plopped down beside me.
“What were you looking for?” I asked.
Penny’s eyes darted away, and he pressed his palms between his knees. Good thing, because the hands-off rules were mine, but I still wanted nothing more than to lace my fingers with his.
“Nothing,” he said, but I wasn’t convinced. “Just putting my sketchbook away.”
There wasn’t time to question him further before we rounded a bend, and the ivy-covered city wall came into view.
As we closed in, I handed the reins to Penny and slid off the side of the cart. The gate swung wide as I took Betty by the bridle to lead her inside.
We entered Ashpoint to scattered applause, though I knew the crowds would gather the further in we got.
I walked Betty all the way to the looming edifice of the Ossuary and tried to smile through my disgust at being congratulated for robbing some poor soul’s grave faster than everyone else.
Once we stopped, Penny hopped off the driver’s bench and circled around to the back of the wagon.
We had already drawn quite a crowd, and more people were filtering in. The sooner we finished this, the sooner we could get home and take much needed baths and eat some hot food. That was the only thing that kept me going as I climbed back into the cart and began prying open the crate lids.
Penny watched while I piled the contents of one box then the next on the floor of the cart, then began sorting supplies from the old bones. He looked ready to speak when the double doors of the Ossuary flew open, and Levitt stepped out.
Sunlight set his fiery hair ablaze, and his eyes swept over Penny and me.
I watched as he came alongside the wagon and slapped his palm against it, searching for any sign of more than platonic affection in his demeanor.
There wasn’t much of anything to be gleaned, though his expression remained guarded, and the smile he fixed on me was strained.
“Thirteen years and you haven’t lost a step,” he said. “I shouldn’t be surprised.”
I gave him a tight grin. “The benefits of experience.” I drew a femur from the open box before me and added it to the pile.
“You two are the first ones back,” Levitt said. He moved toward Penny and clapped a hand on his shoulder. “You couldn’t have hoped for a better mentor, Mister Oliver. I expect great things from you, too, you know.”
Penny seemed to wither under Levitt's praise. He sidled up to me as I heaped the bones into the largest crate with a clatter.
“Can I help?” Penny gestured to the crate. It was clear from his tone that he wanted out of this conversation.
I hefted the box over the edge of the wagon and placed it in his outstretched arms. “Take these inside. I’ll get the rest.”
When Penny disappeared into the Ossuary, Levitt’s barely cheerful expression melted away. His brows drew together, and his mouth pressed into a thin line as he leaned over the edge of the cart toward me.
“We have a problem,” he said, voice low enough that it wouldn’t carry past the two of us.
Unease prickled up my spine. I started sorting bones and supplies out of the next crate. “What sort of problem?”
Levitt drew a slow breath.
“There have been more allegations,” he said. “Against you. We need to search your house. Merrick went ahead as soon as he heard you’d arrived. He’s there now, waiting for us.”
I scoffed and dropped the last of the bones into an empty crate. “What could I have possibly done? We’ve been gone a week.” I flicked a glance at Levitt as I hefted up the other half of mine and Penny’s offering.
Levitt refused to meet my eyes and shifted on his feet. “The accusations are credible enough to require my attention, but they didn’t originate with Merrick.” He hesitated. “They came from Harlan.”
I nearly dropped the crate of bones as dread pooled in my gut. I shifted the roughhewn box to hide my trembling hands.
“My only interaction with Harlan has been getting burn salve,” I said in a rush, hoping Levitt wouldn’t notice the hitch in my voice. “I stopped at the apothecary to get tea for Penny before we left, too, but I dealt with Isla that time. Is it against the rules to treat a cold?”
“That’s not what this is about, Kit,” Levitt said softly. “But we shouldn’t talk about it here.”
He offered a hand down from the cart and kept hold of my elbow even when I was steady on my feet.
“I’ll just grab our bags,” I said, but Levitt shook his head.
“Someone will bring them to the house. They’ll need to be searched as well.” He turned us toward the Ossuary, and his face was grim as he glanced over at me. "Let's go get your recruit.”
I found myself thankful for Levitt’s grip on my arm as the world spun around me.
Everything Penny and I planned, everything I wanted to do, was slipping away.
They’d find the hemlock in my bag, and that would be it.
The only hope I had left was that I could take full blame and keep Penny from punishment.
We’d be lucky if they didn’t put us both to death.