Chapter 26
26
Caleb
A top his horse, Caleb searched the horizon as if it would give him all the answers he needed to move on from the betrayal he’d experienced. An unexpected hurdle came in knowing that his brothers didn’t agree with his sentiment, though he could tolerate their opinions. It was Charlie who was the worst of them. She thought he’d been too quick to judge Emma.
What’s in a name anyway? That’s what she’d asked him. Emma. Emily. Both were the same person. Just because the world knew Emma as one person and he knew Emily as another shouldn’t matter.
There would be no convincing her. If anything, Charlie loved Emma even more knowing that her brother had dated her—sort of.
He huffed and turned his horse around to head home. He could only spend so much time out in the pastures. His horse grew restless, and he knew he was missing supper. That was just as well. He’d just pick at the leftovers that got put in the fridge.
He nudged his horse forward into an easy walk, and that was when his heart started revolting against his mind.
Caleb wanted to believe that he was wrong; he really did. He wanted to try to accept that Emma was only doing what she did in order to protect herself, but there was just too much he could argue against.
From the beginning, he’d been careful. But after getting to know her a little better, he’d allowed himself to start trusting her. The truth was that she hadn’t trusted him.
That was the question he continued to ask himself, over and over again. What had he done—or failed to do—that prevented her from giving him the benefit of the doubt?
Frustration continued to grow, festering like an infected wound deep in his soul.
Trust was everything. She’d broken his. And she wasn’t willing to give him hers.
Those were the points he made when he got himself into this argument. Even if he wanted to get her back, they simply wouldn’t work. A relationship where the two people couldn’t have faith in one another was doomed from the start.
There was barely any light left in the sky when Caleb made it back to the barn. The porch lights glowed from the house, and the exterior lights on the barn had turned on. A soft light from inside the barn emanated—mostly for the sake of anyone who needed to make a quick trip inside or so they could find the main light switch.
The second he entered the barn, he could sense something was off. The horses shuffled restlessly in their stalls. A couple of them poked their heads out of their stalls and tossed their manes before nickering and retreating.
Caleb dismounted, alert and on edge. The hairs on the back of his neck lifted. Whatever was spooking the horses was inside. It could be anything. With the temps dropping, prey was harder to find for the larger predators. There could be a coyote or a wolf somewhere inside the barn.
Maybe it was the change in the weather. Sometimes the animals got antsy when a storm was on its way. Though he knew better than to believe that rationale. He’d just been outside and there wasn’t even a cool breeze to speak of.
He cleared his throat and lifted his chin, wishing for the first time he’d carried a shotgun with him on his rides. “Hello? I know you’re in here. The horses don’t lie.” He worked his jaw, his eyes darting from one side to the next. “You might as well come out, or I’m getting my brothers and when we find you?—”
“Geez, Caleb, will you chill out?” A familiar figure emerged from an empty stall. The beard on his face only momentarily threw Caleb off.
“Carter?” he whispered. He took a step forward, then he ran toward his twin and grabbed him close into a bear hug. Their hold on one another was constrictive and yet more comforting than anything Caleb had experienced in a long time. He didn’t realize he had tears in his eyes until he pulled back and gave his brother a once-over.
Carter had a black eye. His hair was disheveled and mussed, and his beard needed a good trim. The T-shirt and jeans he wore were torn and filthy. It looked like he’d come straight from a bar fight.
Caleb shook his head. “What happened to you?”
“Nothing.” Carter looked away as he stepped back. “I shouldn’t have come back.”
“What? No. You’re not leaving again in your condition.” Caleb’s hand shot out and grabbed Carter by his upper arm.
His brother jumped and yanked his arm out of Caleb’s grasp. He glowered at Caleb, then blew out a harsh breath as he raked a hand through his hair.
“Hey,” Caleb said, quieter this time. “You can tell me. Whatever it is, we’ll help. That’s what family does.”
Carter continued to scowl, but this time he turned his fury to the ground. “ Yeah ? And does family steal? Does family threaten to run away and take steps to never be found again? I think it’s safe to say that I’ve lost the privilege of being called family.”
Caleb wanted to reassure his twin. He wanted to tell him that he was wrong. But how could he tell him any of that when he’d been preaching his whole life that honesty and loyalty are the most important things? If he wasn’t willing to hear Emma out and offer her forgiveness, then it didn’t make sense for him to tell Carter that he’d be welcomed with open arms.
A lump formed in his throat, and he felt sick to his stomach. Wade would argue. Most of his siblings would likely tell Carter that there was a path back from what he’d done.
“You want to know something ironic?” Carter asked, finally looking up to meet Caleb’s gaze. “You were right.”
“About what?”
“Family.”
Caleb’s brows pulled together, creasing. “What about it?”
“It’s everything. Family is the most important thing in this world. I didn’t see it. I didn’t acknowledge it. Our family is one of the biggest in town. You would have thought that if two people were willing to create a family with twelve children, they would love them. But we were abandoned, Caleb. Our parents didn’t want us.”
They’d talked about this before, but usually it was Caleb who was venting about the pain he felt over their loss.
Carter shut his eyes and a tear slipped down his cheek, disappearing into his facial hair. “And even with that terrible start, we made it. We had Wade and Annabel. We understood that our family was what kept us strong and safe.”
Caleb listened in silence. His heart ached for his brother. Or maybe he was actually feeling the ache his brother experienced. Either way, the tightness in his chest had become unbearable.
“Then I had to go and ruin it. I had to break the bond I had with the people who actually cared about me. What kind of person does that?”
“You’re right,” Caleb said.
Carter flinched.
“The people in your family are the only ones you can trust—or should be able to trust. But we’re human. Even family can betray you.”
Another tear slipped down Carter’s cheek. “That’s why I can’t… I won’t go in there and face them.”
It wasn’t hard to understand what he was trying to say. He didn’t think he could talk to their family. Caleb understood that feeling to his core. Hadn’t he done wrong by Liam? He’d been judgmental to the point of tearing Liam away from Margot.
They were quite a pair.
“You don’t have to go in there and face them—not if you don’t want to.”
Carter shook his head. “I don’t think I can. Not with what I did.”
“They’ll trust you again, in time. You just have to earn it back.”
“They shouldn’t have to be put in that position. I should have never?—”
Caleb reached out and placed his hands on his brother’s shoulders, giving him a little shake. “Carter. Listen to me. There’s a reason why you came back. I don’t know what it is. I don’t know what happened. But I do know that you listened to your gut, and this is where it landed you. Don’t ignore that.” His stomach churned as his thoughts shifted to Emma. Was he following his own instincts when it came to his feelings for her?
If anything, he was pushing them away.
He searched Carter’s eyes. “You don’t have to do anything you’re not ready for. If you want me to get you a motel room for a little while before you get up the courage to come back?—”
Carter shook his head. “No. You’re right. I should stay. No more running from my problems.
Caleb glanced at Carter from across the living room. While the family reunion had been tense, and the air around them still was, Carter had taken the first step. It was more than Caleb could say for himself.
He couldn’t stop thinking about Emma. He’d been so focused on convincing his brother to listen to his heart that he’d let himself forget about his own heartache. It was difficult not to draw some parallels to his own situation. The worst part was that Emma’s trespasses weren’t nearly as serious as what Carter had done.
Caleb couldn’t help but feel like a hypocrite.
Charlie settled onto the couch beside Carter and held up her phone, acting as if Carter had only gone out for groceries and not disappeared for a couple years. “Tickets go on sale in one hour. Can you believe it? Emma Hart is coming to Colorado Springs! And she’s debuting a new album!”
Carter offered a smile. “That’s cool, sis.”
“You want to know what’s even better? She was here! She was in Copper Creek. You totally missed it.”
He lifted his brows and glanced at Caleb, who only rolled his eyes.
Charlie scooted even closer, and her voice lowered conspiratorially. “Wanna know something even better ?”
“It gets better?” Carter chuckled dryly.
“Caleb dated her.”
Carter shot a surprised look at Caleb.
“It’s true,” Charlie squealed. “He did. And what’s ridiculous is that no one will go with me to the concert. Not even Caleb. Wade says I have to go with someone because it’s safer. Jokes on him because I’m an adult and I’m going to do what I want.”
Carter’s head whipped around to look at her. “You shouldn’t do that,” he said.
“Why?” Charlie demanded. “Wade isn’t the boss. We’re all adults. Just because we still live here?—”
“Because he’s trying to keep you safe,” Carter interrupted. He glanced at Caleb. “We should go with her.”
Caleb stiffened. “What? Why?”
Charlie squealed at the exact same time Caleb argued.
“Because she needs someone to go with her, and she’s not going to listen to anyone who tells her she shouldn’t. You know Emma?—”
“Absolutely not! What Charlie didn’t tell you is that Emma lied the entire time we were… involved.” He sat up a little straighter.
“Yeah, and she tried to apologize,” Charlie cut in. “She only lied about her name because she didn’t want the paparazzi to know where she was, but Caleb didn’t want to listen.”
Carter frowned. “That doesn’t seem so bad.”
Caleb looked away. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”
“He still loves her,” Charlie teased, causing his gaze to swivel back.
“What? No, I don’t.”
“Sure, you do,” Charlie sang. “Everyone can tell. You haven’t stopped moping for the last six months.”
Carter’s gaze delved into Caleb’s, studying him. “We should go.”
“What? Why?” Caleb repeated, shooting out of his seat. “She probably doesn’t even want to see me. There’s no point.”
“Because if there’s even a small chance… and if your instincts are telling you to do it…” Carter offered him a wan smile. “Then what do you have to lose?”