Chapter 17
17
Hudson
H udson fiddled with the tie at his throat. He hadn’t brought anything nice with him to Rachel’s place, so he wound up in his old room staring in the mirror at a man he barely recognized. Here he was, doing the unthinkable.
Weird didn’t seem to describe accurately what was happening. Hudson had never been interested in dating. He didn’t need to bring anyone else into his already congested life. Carter had it right. He’d gotten out of here before he got himself into trouble.
And yet Hudson didn’t quite feel that way anymore.
It was strange. The more Hudson thought about it, the more he realized just how excited he was. As soon as he’d stopped fighting these feelings, everything became clearer. He saw the opportunity for what it was.
No longer would he have to lump himself in with his family. He could start one of his own. He could find one person to care for who loved him back, and together they could make the world their own.
He scowled at his reflection and tore the tie from his throat. It wasn’t even his. He didn’t exactly own one. There were no reasons to wear one. He’d never been forced to wear them at weddings, and they hadn’t gone to enough funerals to make it a worthy investment.
Lucas was the snazzy dresser. He was the one with the dress clothes, nice shoes, and ties. He was the one who still had a closet at the house where they’d all grown up, even though he no longer lived there.
It was too bad he didn’t hang around much. He might actually be some help.
Motion in the mirror caught Hudson’s attention, and his eyes darted to the reflection of his younger brother. Liam watched with curiosity. There was no judgment, no teasing. He simply appeared to be wondering why Hudson had dressed up for the first time in his life. And why wouldn’t he be curious? Hudson was known for avoiding all kinds of social engagements.
Turning, Hudson stared at his brother and held up the tie like it was a snake he’d just pulled from the brush that surrounded their home. “You know how to tie these things?”
Liam nodded, moving into the room. “Mr. Callahan made me wear them when we went to some of the better auction houses. I’ve never seen so many cowboys in suits.”
Hudson snorted. “I would actually pay good money to see that.”
“It wasn’t as interesting as you think it is.” Liam took the tie from his brother and maneuvered the fabric around into a triangular knot. “There. See? It’s not that hard.”
“I didn’t see anything of what you just did.”
Liam grinned. “It’s a good thing you’re probably never going to need to know.”
Hudson gave his brother a funny look. “Why do you say that?” He turned toward the mirror again and tightened the knot a little closer to his throat. “I might need to know how to do this for my wedding.”
“Unless you don’t get married.”
His brother wasn’t trying to be rude. He was just stating a fact. Hudson didn’t like to be around people. No one had figured out that he had a thing for Rachel. At least he didn’t think so. The only one who might come close was Henry, and that was only because Hudson had called him to help out.
Still, Hudson hadn’t confirmed any of that. He’d rather maintain some degree of privacy, even when it came to his brothers. One more quick look at Liam confirmed that Hudson’s question had only added to Liam’s confusion.
It was fine. People change. Hudson was no exception.
The awkward silence continued to grow between them until Liam’s staring got to be a little too unnerving. Hudson turned to his brother with narrowed eyes. “Did you want something?”
Liam didn’t waste any time tiptoeing around the question. He gestured vaguely at Hudson’s outfit. “What are you doing tonight? You’re not going to one of those fancy auctions, are you?”
Hudson shook his head as he moved past his brother to grab his sports coat. “No. I’m going out.”
“Going out where?”
“That’s none of your business.”
“I’m sure I could find out,” Liam said. “Maybe Henry would know.” He turned to leave, but Hudson caught him by the collar and pulled him back a step.
“Why do you think that Henry would know?”
Liam shrugged. “Because he went over to Rachel’s place for dinner last night. I thought he went to see you.” Liam tore his shirt out of Hudson’s grasp and squinted at him. “You didn’t have to stretch out my shirt.”
“Sorry,” Hudson said. So, Henry hadn’t said anything—that is, if he actually knew something.
Liam rubbed the back of his neck, then dropped his hand with a frustrated sigh. “No one is going to believe you’re not up to something tonight. You might as well tell me.”
“ Why ? So you can go spreading gossip about me? No thanks,” he muttered.
“Maybe I could help. I’ll take them off the scent—you know, make them think you’re really off doing something else.”
Hudson crossed his arms. He cocked a brow as he studied his brother. “You don’t need the truth in order to do something like that for me. You could just tell everyone that I’m out on a date.”
Liam’s guffaw was a little overkill. He shook his head and rolled his eyes. “No one is going to believe that for a second. Come on, you can tell me. I won’t say anything.”
“What’s it to you?” Hudson reached for his hat, then hesitated. The restaurant they were going to probably wouldn’t appreciate it if he were to enter with his dusty Stetson. Oh well, they could just deal with it. He felt naked without it. He’d dressed up, hadn’t he? The people running the show could learn to appreciate that effort. Hudson grabbed it and placed it on his head.
“You look like you’re one of those bodyguards in the movies. Is Rachel going to be okay?”
Hudson shot a disinterested look toward his brother. He still wasn’t pleased that Wade had let Liam tag along. While he was on the younger side, he was still old enough to help out. Wade probably spilled every detail not only to Liam but to everyone else on what had happened after the break-in. “She’s going to be fine. We haven’t seen any activity from the hooligans who broke her window. I think I scared them off. But that doesn’t mean we should stop looking for them.” He gave Liam a pointed look. “If you’re helping out, I’d prefer that you get stationed at the house. I don’t need you getting taken by surprise in the dark out in the middle of nowhere.”
Liam nodded. “I can tell Wade. He said we’d start taking shifts tonight. We had a meeting about it yesterday after Henry came home.”
There was one thing Hudson did love about his family. They could be counted on to help when the time arose. Hudson shuffled past Liam but stopped when his brother spoke again.
“So, you’re not going to tell me where you’re going?”
A smile tugged at Hudson’s lips. “It doesn’t matter.”
“But you’re wearing Lucas’s stuff. What do I tell him?”
“He won’t even know it’s missing,” Hudson called back. “I found it in a box in the attic.” He headed out the front door, thankful that no one else stopped him to ask about his clothes or why he’d come home in the first place. Tonight was just for him.
Hudson stood outside Rachel’s home, unable to bring himself to knock on the door. How many times had he entered the premises without a second thought? Rachel was in there somewhere, getting ready or already waiting for their date. He could just go inside and tell her it was time to leave.
For some reason that felt wrong.
Wooden floorboards creaked beneath his boots as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other. He hadn’t exactly thought tonight through. The beginning and end of the date would see them both at the same location. Would it be awkward when he brought her home?
He tugged at the tie, but it wouldn’t budge. Why was he suddenly feeling so hot? He couldn’t breathe. What was wrong with him?
Nothing , he told himself. You’ve never been on a date that you actually cared about .
That was it.
Up until this moment in time, he hadn’t been on a date that mattered. The handful of outings he’d gone on were fine, but when they were over, he didn’t really care. It was like going to a fast-food restaurant. The experience is enjoyable but not something worth repeating over and over again every single night.
But Rachel was different.
She wasn’t an average burger. She was the air he breathed, the sturdy earth beneath his feet, the water that brought him life. Rachel was everything he needed and everything he craved, all in one package.
He wasn’t sure when the shift had actually taken place. It felt like he’d known this forever. The kiss the other night was far from being the catalyst, but it was something that pushed him over the edge. It would be a moment that would forever live in his heart.
Straightening his shoulders and lifting his chin, Hudson knocked on the door that, in a way, belonged to them both. It opened immediately and Rachel smiled at him.
“I was wondering if you were having second thoughts.”
His eyes widened slightly. “Were you watching me?”
She shrugged. “I saw you pull up, but I wasn’t sure how you wanted tonight to play out.”
Hudson looked down. These feelings were all too new. He was terrified he’d mess everything up. His gaze swept over her from her feet to her eyes, and he reached for her hand. He couldn’t show weakness. Her hand was soft and delicate in his, and he squeezed it gently as he pulled her from the house. “I have no intention of backtracking. I’m all in.”
“Good,” she murmured. “Me neither.”
He pulled her closer, his arm wrapping around her waist. Scents of lavender and citrus inundated his senses. The pale blue floral dress she wore accentuated the color of her eyes, making them pop. She’d swept her hair up into a delicate pile of curls that begged to be let down.
His breathing grew more ragged, and he pressed his forehead against hers. There was so much he wanted to say, but he couldn’t find the words to say them. His tongue was tied, and his heart refused to settle. “Should we… get going?” Hudson whispered, pulling back.
Rachel’s eyes fluttered open, and that familiar spark passed between them. She nodded.
Hudson tugged her to come with him. They walked down the steps, hand in hand, until they reached the truck. He opened the door and helped her inside. Everything inside him begged him to kiss her, to pull her from the truck and repeat their experience from the other night. But he refrained. Tonight was going to be about setting a foundation for the two of them—to ensure they were on the same page.
He gave her one more fleeting look and then shut the door firmly before hurrying around the side of the truck. The second he climbed in behind the wheel, Rachel said, “You clean up nice.”
The corners of his lips quirked upward. “Speak for yourself. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you wear anything but jeans or slacks.”
She groaned. “That’s because ever since I was a kid, I had to wear all the frilly nonsense that came with being part of high society.”
He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. She’d never told him about her past. He’d merely caught snippets from what Athena would say. All he knew was that her parents were wealthy. She’d been adopted and raised with everything she could have possibly wanted. Only recently had he found out she had her own money. “Sounds… hard.”
Rachel fidgeted with her dress. “I know it’s not as bad as what others experience—certainly not Athena… or you…” Her voice trailed off, and her face flushed scarlet. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to talk about that sort of thing.”
“Why not?”
She stiffened, giving him a surprised look. “Because… you…”
Hudson heaved a sigh and faced her. “I’m a private person. I don’t share much of my personal life with anyone. For your own reasons, you’ve done the same. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to get to know you better. What I do know…” He cocked his head and reached out to graze her jawline with his crooked finger. “…I like.”
Rachel reached up and grasped his hand in hers, then smiled. “Okay,” she whispered.