Chapter Ten #2
“I . . . I don’t know anyone who can help you, and right now I feel terribly inadequate.
I love . . . you.” She faltered slightly, then regained fluency.
“And because I love you, I can see what all this hatred for Jennings is doing to you. Your bitterness and drive for revenge have become an obsession, an angry monster that’s consuming your life.
” She stood directly in front of him. “You invented a wonderful safety device that will save thousands of lives. Unfortunately, you’ll probably never get the credit.
But you have the personal satisfaction of this accomplishment. Isn’t it enough?”
“No,” Cole shouted, his face cold and solemn, his narrowed eyes darkened with emotion. He stopped and rubbed a hand over his
eyes, then the side of his face, distorting his features. “I won’t rest until I’ve seen justice.”
“That will probably never happen. You’ve got to accept this and a whole lot more.” She paused, knowing how difficult this
would be for Cole and how hard it was for her to say these things to him. “You need peace within yourself. You’ve got to forgive
Jennings.”
“Forgive Jennings!” Cole spat in disbelief. “You’re crazy.”
“I’ve never been more serious in my life.”
“Then you couldn’t possibly understand what that man has done to me,” Cole shouted. “To us.”
“What Jennings did was wrong,” she replied calmly. “I could never deny that. But what you’re doing to yourself is far worse.”
Cole bounded to his feet and stalked to one end of the room, his eyes blazing. “I can’t believe you’d even suggest such a
thing.”
The smile that touched her eyes was troubled and sad. “It’s the way I was raised. My parents brought up Terry and me in an
atmosphere of love and forgiveness. We were raised in the church—”
“Here it comes.” The shadows of pain darkened his eyes. “I thought you just got done telling me I’d helped you get over being a self-righteous prude?”
“That doesn’t have anything to do with this,” Lesley defended herself, looking straight into Cole’s shocked expression.
“But you’re going to give me some holier-than-thou advice about forgiving the man who’s ruining my life.”
“The man you’re letting ruin your life,” she amended, hoping he would catch the subtle difference.
“Lesley, listen to me,” Cole pleaded, fighting for control of his temper. “You’re not making any sense.”
With an aching heart, Lesley studied Cole: the roughly carved jaw, the thick creased grooves in his forehead, the tight line
of his mouth. She would give anything to make herself clear, anything to help him understand.
“Today is Good Friday,” she said at last.
A heavy silence hung in the room.
“What’s that supposed to mean to me?” His expression was as hard as a granite wall.
“Unless you’re a Christian, I guess it doesn’t mean much.”
“Then why bring it into the conversation now?” Slowly he walked to the far side of the room, his hard gaze pinning her.
“Because we were talking about forgiveness.”
“Are we back on that subject again?”
Lesley’s smile was tremulous. “I never stopped talking about it. When Jesus hung on that cross, He wasn’t the pretty picture
some artists have depicted. He was beaten so badly that He was unrecognizable as a man. He hung in shame between two criminals.”
“Are you going to insist on giving me a Bible lesson?”
“Yes,” she cried, her voice shaking violently. “Yes, I am, because maybe then you’ll understand. Jesus was perfect . . . sinless . . .
the Lamb of God.”
Cole glanced away, a bored look on his face.
“When Jesus hung on the cross, He took every sin, every evil that was ever in the world—the past, the present and the future. He became so hideously ugly with sin that God the Father had to actually turn His back on Him. That was why Jesus called out and asked why His Father had forsaken Him.”
“How much more of this do I have to listen to?”
“Not much.”
His look was one of indulgent cynicism. “Good.” He crossed his arms in front of his chest as if that could block out her words.
“Yet Jesus, in all his pain and torment, asked that God forgive.” Lesley knew she wasn’t reaching Cole, she doubted that anything
she said would. Nonetheless she continued. “Don’t you understand? If Jesus could show that kind of forgiveness for you and
me, couldn’t you find it in your heart to forgive Jennings?”
Cole’s hands knotted into tight fists. For a long time he said nothing as he stood before her. He was so tall and hard, he
might as well have been carved out of stone. “You ask too much.”
Her eyes wide and shimmering with tears, Lesley slipped the engagement ring off her finger. “I love you, Cole, but my love
will never be enough for you.” She placed the ring in the palm of his hand.
“You don’t mean this?” Cole’s voice was as cold as the arctic wind.
“I’ve never been more serious.”
“I won’t come back.” Cole’s low words weren’t a threat but a promise.
“I know that,” she murmured and glanced down at the carpet. “God go with you, Cole.”
One dark brow shot up with sardonic disbelief. “I’m taking the car with me. I’ll contact the owner about the duplex. Whatever’s inside can be given to charity. That’s about as Christian as I plan to get.” He walked out of the house, looking back at her once, his gaze whip-sharp. “Goodbye, Lesley.”
A hand over her mouth to hold back the threatening sobs, Lesley watched as he walked out of her half of the house and into
his half. Not questioning her actions, she took the small devotional Bible on the end table and ran outside. If she tried
to give it to Cole now, he’d throw it back at her. Carefully and as noiselessly as possible she placed it in the backseat
of his car.
She was in the house by the time he returned. He glanced back at her once, his look uncompromisingly hard. Without another
word he backed out of the driveway and out of her life.