22. Rufino
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Rufino
C ollision has a full house tonight.
Everything here reminds me of her and it’s making me sick to my stomach.
I need her.
I yearn for her, it’s crushing me inside. I came here to find one of Verity’s friends. To see if I could get any information about where she might be. But none of them have seen her since before we got married. They haven’t spoke to her.
She’s disappeared off the map.
Music vibrates through my body as I scan the sea of faces, dancing, laughing, celebrating life as though they have something to live for.
I’ve been searching and finding nothing but dead ends and bad leads for days now. Without Verity, I’m losing my mind. I can sense it slipping away from me. She is my stability. She keeps me grounded.
The barmen sets another shot of vodka in front of me. I pick it up and toss it back, letting it burn down my throat. The alcohol is numbing the pain for a moment. I’m so drained, so exhausted, that I don’t know what to do.
I slam the empty shot glass down on the counter top.
“Another.” I demand, then change my mind. “Just leave the fucking bottle.” I can see the judgement in his eyes, but I don’t give a fuck. They know who I am, and they know better than to deny me what I want.
He sets it down in front of me and backs away with a sour look on his face.
Fuck him.
Fuck everyone.
Picking up the bottle I drink straight from it. Taking long gulps of the crystal clear poison. I want to feel less.
This is my only option. In no time at all the blurry vision and slurred thoughts are making me laugh. It’s not amusement. It’s not happiness. It’s pure anger.
Anger because the world took away the one beautiful thing I had in my life.
Anger because nothing has meaning without her.
Anger because I’m failing.
I made her a promise. I was supposed to keep her safe. I was supposed to keep her with me.
I have failed her, and I don’t know how to fix it.
I step away from the bar, shove a guy out of my way as I stumble forward. He was dancing too close. Annoying me.
He trips and hits leg on a table.
“You fucker.” He shouts, turning to face me.
Oh, yes , I want this. I want to fight him. I laugh louder.
He raises his hands in the air, appearing much calmer. “Wait, bro, it’s ok. It was my fault. I’m sorry. No problem, man. I’m sorry.” He steps back so fast he trips again, then scoots away across the floor.
“Weak.” I scream at him and several people in the club turn to glare at me but just as quickly they turn away again.
In a blind fit I smash the bottle across the same table he tripped over. Glass shatters around me.
“Does nobody want to fight me?” I shout. “Are you all scared? Is life too precious?”
Around me a wide space opens up as people scamper to create distance from me.
I spin in a slow circle with my arms spread wide. I need this.
“There must be someone ?”
“He’s over there. Please, get him out of here.” I turn towards the voice and see one of their bouncers - standing next to Masaccio and Tuomo.
“Fuck.” I growl.
Mas storms over to me and tries to grab the broken bottle from my hand. I move to the side and duck away from him.
“Rufino you have to leave before the cops get here. They’ve already been called. They gave us a head start as a courtesy to the family, but they are on the way.”
“Let them come.” I laugh. “Let them try and take me.”
“You’ve lost your mind.” Tuomo says, trying to grab my arm.
I’m seeing two of both of them which is amusing because they’re already identical twins and now there are four of them swaying back and forth in front of my vision. I point at their blurred faces and mock them with my anger.
“Grab him, we have to drag him out. We can’t be attracting this much attention.” Mas mutters to Tuomo.
He steps close to me and I swing my fist.
He wasn’t expecting it and with one shot I send him flying backwards.
“You mother fucker.” Tuomo hisses and comes running at me. His shoulder slams into my chest and all the air of knocked from my lungs. I gasp, fighting confusion for a moment, then I start beating my elbow into the back of his head until he lets me go.
He flies at me again, angry and over my shit by the looks of things.
But I’m not backing down. I hate them.
I hate them for what they did.
I hate them more than I hate her father because I expected more from my family.
A mistake I will never make again.
The fight grows steadily more violent.
Masaccio tries to step in between us, and I fling the broken bottle at his face. It cuts him across the cheek before it splinters into pieces behind him.
My hand is bleeding, but I don’t know what from. When I grab Tuomo around the throat, the blood dripping between my fingers makes it slippery and sticky.
Tuomo is on his back, lying on the floor beneath me. I now have both of my hands wrapped around his throat, and his eyes are bulging from his head.
His lips are turning blue. The panic in his eyes is more than satisfying. It’s perfect.
I squeeze tighter.
Masaccio leaps onto my back, clawing at my throat, locking his elbow around my neck and trying to pull me away from our brother.
“You’ll kill him. Stop, Rufino .” Masaccio screams against my ear.
“I’ll kill both of you.” I scream back, my eyes narrowing with determination. My arm muscles ripple as I try to break Tuomo’s neck with the weight of my body.
Masaccio presses something against the side of my throat and a million volts of lightening snap through me like sharp blades of ice. My body convulses and spasm - completely out of my control. I fall to the side.
Tuomo is no longer beneath me. I am leaning against the floor fighting for air while every muscle in my body screams at me.
The pain of being tasered is dark.
A grin spreads across my face and I wipe the spit away from my lips.
“Again.” I turn towards Masaccio. “Do it again”
This time the taser knocks me out.
All I see is the floor coming up towards my face at incredible speed. Then nothing. Blissful peace. The first moment of peace I’ve had since I lost her.
No dreams. No haunting nightmares.
Next I know I’m outside the club - music pulsing behind me from behind the walls. Its muffled. Only the steady beat of bass reaching the open night air.
I’m being held up between the twins, their arms wrapped beneath mine, supporting me as they drag me towards the car.
Fuck this. I’m not going with them.
I kick my feet into the ground and throw myself backwards. I’m too big for them to hold. Tuomo swears.
“Fucking asshole.” He snarls.
“Get in the fucking car.” Masaccio demands, pointing at the car as though I was a kid, and he was the parent, dictating and controlling.
“Go fuck yourselves.” I snarl, then turn and run.
I’m too drunk to see which direction I’m headed in and I don’t care. I just need to escape those fucking back stabbing mother fuckers who took the only thing in the world that I want and gave her away.
That they think I’ll let that go - forgive them - be ok with them - they are the crazy ones.
Images flash through my mind of Tuomo with protruding eyes and blue lips. I flex my fists as I run.
I was going to kill him.
I wanted to.
I would have.
And even now - I don’t trust myself not to kill them if I get into that car with them. They are safer if they just let me go.
I’m not looking for revenge against them - not yet, anyway.
All I’m trying to do is get back to her.
If I can’t - if I cannot find her - then they will reap the wrath of that pain.
For now I still have hope. Dwindling and feint, but I’m not giving up.
I won’t ever give up.
I run until my lungs scream and a stitch tightens my ribs. I run because it burns. It hurts everywhere. The pain is a pleasure I need. It’ll keep me sharp and burn the alcohol away.
When I stop, gasping for air, folded double with my hand pressed against my ribs, I’m at the docks. A rich scent of salt and boat fuel drift around this place giving it a distinct smell. Mixed with the smell of seals and raw fish.
I stand up, flexing my shoulders and rolling my neck.
My feet thud on the wooden jetty floating between massive yachts as I walk towards the end.
Its pitch dark and deadly silent. The only sound is the ocean water, lapping against the sides of those boats. Pristine, glossed white and blue. I’d like to take Verity on one of theses. Sail her around the world, we could escape everyone. Watch sunsets. Be alone.
I sit with a loud huff on a chunky wooden pole. A thick rope is wrapped around it. My eyes follow the rope up towards the boat that is anchored to the dock here.
Burn it all down. A voice in my head encourages me.
Burn it to the ground. Burn everything. Until you find her.
I pull a silver lighter out of my back pocket. The metal body engraved with a snake. Flicking it back and forth in my fingers I spark a flame and then snap the lid closed over it to smother it out again.
Burn it.
Burn everything.
The thought won’t let go.
It’s the answer. The solution to finding her.
Standing with renewed enthusiasm I pick up a small barrel of fuel sitting near the loading area of the yacht. The menacing grin on my face would send chills through anyone who looked my way. But there is no one here. Not a soul around.
Tossing the bottle cap into the water I throw the open fuel can into the deck of the closest yacht. Then I spark my lighter to life. For a moment I watch the flame dance in the quiet night air.
With a quick flick of my wrist I throw the lighter onto the yacht as well.
For a second nothing happens.
Then a wall of fire explodes up from the deck of the boat.
It throws me off balance and I land hard on my ass on the jetty. Laughing like a mad man.
“Burn it all down. Burn everything until you find her.” I scream against the heat pushing towards me.
Standing up I dust my hands over my pants.
It’s time to go. I have things to do.
I have a plan. Finally , I have a plan.
I’m going to see if my hacker friend has come up with a list of Luca A’Vara’s properties.
I will burn them down - one by one - until he gives her back to me.
As promised, I will take everything from him. He will beg me to stop but I won’t. I will keep going until she is in my arms.