12. Nerissa
CHAPTER TWELVE
Nerissa
I stand in the doorway for ages. Frozen from fear and shock. I have already watched long enough to see him disappear down the stairway, out of sight. I listened as his footsteps faded all the way to the ground floor. But I still can’t move myself from this doorframe.
My eyes are still glued to the end of the passage.
I am so terrified I can’t move.
From somewhere in my little apartment my phone buzzes as I receive a message.
I jump in fright, snapped out of my stupor. I close the door and lock it.
I can’t believe that just happened.
Tuomo Vece was in my apartment. He was here. He was - he pinned me to the bed - he - he kissed me.
I lift my hand and touch my fingers to my lips. He kissed me.
When I was young, his kiss was the most exciting thing I had ever experienced in my entire life.
But I was na?ve back then. I didn’t understand he was an actual monster of a man from a monstrous family.
I sigh, walking towards my bed to find my phone.
Now, I am old enough to see the truth about who he is, but his kiss still shook me to my core. I’ve kissed other men - but it has never felt like that.
I think, perhaps, it is just the sense of danger. The adrenaline in my veins. The fear in my heart. That’s all it was.
I sit on my bed, facing the door because I am too scared to turn my back to it.
I flick my phone on and navigate to the messages to see who is sending me things at four in the morning.
Tuomo: Turn off your light and go to sleep, little bird. I will see you at Restaurant Du Mort on the seventeenth at eight o’clock. Night, beautiful girl.
I stare at the message. And somehow, I know he is looking through my bedroom window. He is down there, in the street, perhaps sitting in his car, and he is looking at my bedroom window.
I should check, but I’m too scared.
Instead, I reach over and switch my light off. Then I sit with my legs curled against my chest and the blankets wrapped around me, unable to sleep. Barely able to move.
I can’t believe what just happened.
I can’t believe he was in my apartment.
How many times has he been in here? He knew exactly where the wine was, and where the glasses were. Even where my little memory box was. He knew which dress I had been admiring in the shop window.
I bite my bottom lip, sinking down into my bed.
I am so tired I feel like my bones are aching from it.
I think I will never sleep again, but it’s been a long night and sleep steals me away much faster than I could have imagined.
I wake up the next morning with a fright. Rolling over and throwing the blankets off and looking around my entire apartment.
But Tuomo isn’t there.
A s the days go by, I do not see him anywhere. I keep a sharp look out for him, but he isn’t there.
It’s strange, because it’s like he is everywhere - watching me all the time - his eyes on me and that dark smile curling up at the corners as he spies on me.
But I think I am just paranoid after finding him in my bedroom.
The shock is wearing off though and as the days go by and I don’t see him I feel more and more at ease.
Maybe it was just a stupid attempt at a surprise. Maybe he really didn’t have any intensions of scaring me.
But - no - I know better than that. I shouldn’t play it down. I shouldn’t make excuses for him.
His family is dangerous. I can’t forget that.
The Vece family always gets what they want, no matter who they have to walk over to make it happen.
That’s why - and I concluded after a lot of thought, that is why I have to go on the date.
If I go on the date, then I have kept my word. And in a public, safe place, I can try to talk some reason into him. My bedroom, at past three in the mooring, after terrifying the living daylight out of me - was not a good place.
But in a restaurant filled with people and noise and atmosphere - I am sure I can get him to see reason and understand that we are from different worlds.
Ugh.
It doesn’t help that I still think he is the hottest guy on the planet.
In fact - yes - he got hotter and it’s an enormous problem trying to stay focused around him.
But looks isn’t everything. His heart is dark. And stained with his family’s blood. Generations of dangerous men that I want nothing to do with.
So, I will go on the date. But that is it.
After that I am done with him.
I won’t agree to a second date. In fact, I hope I never see him again.
After the date my new job will be starting and everything in my life will fall into place. I will focus on my career and not have to worry about Tuomo - or any men for that matter. I can just focus on me.
As the weeks pass by my sense of security increases. I am relaxed and confident that it was just a stupid misunderstanding. I spend time with Hayley, and I learn about the new company I am going to be working for. I’m happy and confident and excited.
Now and then I get a shudder down my spine, and an icy shiver over my neck it’s like someone is watching me - but I know I am just being paranoid. Especially someone like Tuomo. He is way too busy to be sneaking around all day following me. He has a life. He has a business. He has a family.
It’s just ridiculous to think that he is stalking me.
I can’t help but glance around me when I get that strange sensation, it prickles my skin.
I never see him. I never expect to either. I just - I have to check.
As the night of our date gets closer, I think about Tuomo more.
I remember who he is, how he treated me. I remember his father, his brothers, and how terrified I was of them. Tuomo was like this forbidden, mysterious temptation. He isn’t that anymore. He’s very real and very dangerous now. There is nothing mysterious about him and I need to keep my guard up.
One date.
I will play nice.
I will be friendly.
And then I will never see him again because he will find out how boring I am.
I mean - that’s what’s happening here. He also remembers me as this forbidden girl. The girl his father told him never to be with. He has some kind of idea in his head about me and I know I am not that person. I am not that exciting or that beautiful. He just needs to spend time with me to realize that there are hundreds - thousands - of girls in this city ten times prettier than I am.
He can have any of them. His family is infamous. Girls probably fall all over him every day.
I nod to myself as I leave my apartment, walking down to the little cafe on the corner to get some milk for my tea. I shove my hands into my baggy jeans pockets and focus on what’s ahead of me so that I can ignore the creepy sensation of being watched again.
One date.
He will see the real me.
It will all be over.
He will ghost me just like every single other boy who ever showed an interest in me since as long as I can remember.