24. Nerissa
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Nerissa
I climb back into bed, but my heart is racing.
He’s out there. He’s watching me or waiting for something.
I should be terrified but I’m not.
This isn’t normal behavior though and my reaction to his behavior isn’t normal either. Why would I like the fact that he is stalking me?
I sigh, rolling over and pulling the covers up over my head.
Is there something wrong with me?
Why does this turn me on?
Dammit, Nerissa. You’ve fallen for a tall dark and handsome giant red flag and you’re too stupid to stop it from happening.
I don’t know whether I should stay awake and wait for him to creep into my room. He knows how to get in here. He got in just fine on the night of my party.
I sit up suddenly filled with anxiety.
How many times has he been in here?
And if I was right about the sensation of him watching me today - how many times have I been right in the past?
Has he been following me the entire time?
He knows so much about me - it seems obvious. But I guess I wanted to turn a blind eye to this alarming truth about him.
Despite that, even now - I like it.
I like the fact that he is so fascinated by me. I enjoy being wanted by someone to the point of them needing to be around me so much.
Am I really that special to him? The man who could have any girl his heart desires.
I lie back down, staring up at the ceiling, trying to count all the times I thought I felt him near me.
This is evidence of how dangerous he is. And in all honesty, it should have me calling the cops.
So, why am I just lying here waiting for him?
Did he leave when he saw me looking out the window?
What does this mean?
I have so many questions pulsing through my mind. I’m jittery and unable to find peace, my mind racing. I can’t lie here forever waiting for someone who might not even be there anymore. I should get up and check.
No.
I can’t.
I could message him.
No.
Leave it alone. Don’t encourage it.
You know it’s wrong.
I grab my pillow and press it over my face, forcing myself to close my eyes.
I need to sleep. Tomorrow, I need to find a job. Tuomo is not healthy for me and tonight proves that even more. He’s who I thought he was - dangerous - risky.
So, then why am I fantasizing about him breaking in here and doing whatever he wants to me?
“Dammit, Nerissa.” I whisper into my pillow.
I’m losing myself. Or I’ve already lost myself. Either way I am in way too deep - and everything happened so fast. It’s like he orchestrated the entire thing, manipulating me every step of the way.
I’m not even sure what he is really capable of.
It’s like I want to test his limits. I want to test how far he would go. But I don’t really want to find out though. The fantasy of having a guy stalking you is so much sexier than having him stalk you.
What would my mother think of all of this? She’d be so angry with me for letting it get this far. And even Hayley. If I had told her the truth about who he is - and how I thought, he was following me - she would have had me committed to a psych ward.
Tossing and turning I’m overwhelmed, and guilty, and scared, and turned on -
I don’t know how or when, but I fall asleep and of course, I dream of him.
H is hands are on my body as I roll over in bed. He is lying next to me. He smiles when I look up at him. I should scream, but I don’t. My silence is like an invitation.
His hand travels up over my side, heating my skin wherever it touches. I moan and he pulls me closer. His cock is hard against my naked body, and I’m tingling with desire.
My breath catches when he presses his lips against mine. His hand locks around my throat as he rolls onto me.
“Wait—” I whisper. This is wrong. I shouldn’t let this happen. I shouldn’t want this. But I spread my legs, another invite.
His dark eyes are on me, penetrating my soul. I feel as though he is possessing me, my body no longer belongs to me, and he can do whatever he wishes to it.
He pushes my face to the side, pressing it hard against the pillow and leans forward to whisper against my ear. His deep voice is a threatening growl that makes my pussy throb with desire.
“You belong to me, little bird.”
I gasp, fighting against the unknown of what he plans to do with me.
His hand is between my thighs, his fingers pushing into me.
My eyes flutter closed as pleasure floods me.
Then I feel his cock. His monstrous cock, rubbing over my pussy.
I rock my hips upwards against him, trying to guide him into me.
He chuckles. A deliciously dark sound that vibrates through my entire body sending shivers down my spine.
“Tuomo.” I call out his name like a drug on my lips.
He moves against me, pushing inside me. It is indescribable. I moan louder, digging my nails into his skin, wanting everything.
He pushes deep into me, and I can barely breathe.
M y eyes shoot open, and I lie dead still in my bed. I’m facing the wall, trying to keep my breathing even. Trying to stay as quiet as possible to not give away the fact that I am no longer sleeping.
Is he here?
Is he in my room?
What woke me up?
My heart is racing. It could be from my dream. I can feel the layer of perspiration on my chest, heated desire spilling over into the real world.
I want to roll over and look around my room, but I’m frozen in place.
What do I do if he really is in my room?
The darkness is heavy and ominous. I shouldn’t be this scared of him, but I am. I don’t know what he’s capable of.
Should I say his name? Will he answer me?
The tension of not knowing if I’m alone is making my entire body rigid with fear.
E very cell in my body is alert. Adrenaline is coursing through my blood like molten lava. I can’t just lie here forever. I need to do something.
If he was going to do something bad, he would have done it already.
I take a deep breath, willing myself to roll over and scan the rest of the room. The darkness makes it hard to see and even the shape of my jacket in the corner, hanging from the closet handle, looks like it could be something else.
I’m being ridiculous. It was just the dream that made me wake up.
I shift my body, waiting, nothing happens.
Gathering all my courage I roll over onto my back and immediately I see him.
A scream building in the back of my throat and bursts through my lips, loud and piercing through the still darkness of my room.
In a flash he moves over me, reaching out he clamps his hand over my face.
I struggle, kicking out and tangling myself in the blankets. Panic removes all reason, and I fight hard against him as he presses me into the bed.
I don’t stop. I don’t give up.
He climbs onto the bed, kneeling over me so that I am trapped beneath him.
I scream against his hand, but the sound is muffled and pointless.
“Stop.” He shouts, pressing down harder until my face hurts.
“Nerissa, stop.” He snarls angrily.
I can’t breathe and I can’t move. I freeze, staring up at him with wide eyes, pleading him to let me go.