18. Leora
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Leora
“ W hy are you giving me this?” I stare down at the black credit card. My father used to have one. I guess that was before all of his money issues. Even when he had one though - he would never have just handed it to me like this.
“I want you to go out and spoil yourself today. Have some fun.” He smiles and I eye him through narrowed lids. What game is he playing now?
I bite at the inside of my cheek, wondering if it’s a good idea for me to take this or not.
But then I smirk.
“Thanks.” I say, sliding the card into the inside pocket of my handbag.
I clearly can’t have an emotional relationship with him. My married life is doomed to be this lonely empty fake thing - but - I can take advantage of his money and at least get some joy out of this arrangement.
“What time will you be home?” He asks, standing too close to me.
I step back. “I won’t be home for dinner.” I say.
“You have to eat, Leora.”
“I am meeting Isabelle for cocktails this afternoon and we’ll get some pizza or something.”
“Oh, ok, that sounds fun. Well, just message me so I know you’re safe. Let me know if you need a ride home. I’ll come and fetch you.”
“I’ll get the driver to take me.” I raise one brow at him, so confused about what the fuck he’s up to. Why is he trying to be nice?
I don’t want to get roped into thinking he likes me again. I can’t take that risk. I can’t open my heart again - it will kill me if I am stupid enough to do that and he pushes me away.
It’s not worth it.
He’s made it clear - I remind myself.
“Alright, but if you change your mind and want me to fetch you - just call.” He leans down and catches me by surprise when he kisses me goodbye. “Have fun, Leo.” He grins.
“Leo?”
“Like a little wild kitten.” He chuckles.
I pull the corner of my mouth to the side. Nicknames. He really is up to something.
I sigh and step away from him. “Alright. I’m going.”
“Don’t you want coffee? I can make you one to go?”
“No - thanks anyway. Have a good day.”
He smiles, but it’s a little less cheerful. I don’t think he likes it when I say no to him.
Well, surprise asshole, you’ve earned all the no’s I give you.
I go overboard.
I mean - ridiculous.
I buy everything I want and more. I am kind of horrified with myself about the amount of money I spent today - and I know that when I get home, he’s going to be furious with me. I can’t blame him. I just - I went too far. That’s all.
I started shopping, and once I got going my mind sort of flipped into this mode where I wanted to get revenge on him for hurting me - and I was all in with the ‘I can’t have love, but I can have pretty things’ justification.
The driver keeps carrying my shopping bags back to the car for me and I can even tell by the look on his face that I’ve gone too far.
Now I’m nervous to go home.
I giggle to myself as I swipe Masaccio’s credit card again - paying for a pair of diamond earrings that I have to have. Even though I’ve spent too much - there is no point in stopping now. I’m already going to be in trouble. He’ll take the card away the minute I get home, so I may as well get what I want now.
I was going to message Isabelle and invite her for cocktails. But at this point my feet are hurting, I’m too tired, and I want to go home and browse through all my new things. I can repack my closet and decorate my bedroom with the little cute things I got to make it feel more like home.
I glance at my watch.
I’ve been shopping for six hours. I stopped for a coffee and a little lunch, but that only took about forty minutes. That’s just insane. I have never shopped for that many hours in one day before.
No wonder I’m so tired.
I can’t even remember everything I bought, I realize with shock, then laugh at myself again.
Laugh now - cry later when Mas tears your head off.
I continue to grin. Whatever. This is his fault.
Slinging my new Versace handbag over my shoulder I shrug, I guess it’s time to face the music at home.
I message the driver to meet me out front and then, swinging the last of my shopping items in their pretty paper bags, I walk towards the exit - and towards the inevitable lecture I am about to get. It’ll still be worth it.
Arriving back home I feel a little tense.
The driver has to call one of the security guys to help carry all of my shopping bags up to my room and even together they have to do two trips.
I walk into the house with a nervous step - peeking around the corner - waiting for Mas to come marching towards me with a face of rage.
Nothing.
Silence.
If I’m quick, I can rush to my room and close the door and face his wrath another day.
I make a run for it, but he catches me at the top of the stairs.
“Leo - I thought you were going out for dinner.”
“I - changed my mind.” I say too.
“Ok, well join me then. You mentioned pizza this morning, and it made me crave it all day. I’ve ordered two. Do you like mushroom and salami?”
“I do.” I eye him, waiting for the outburst. Did he not get notifications on his phone every time I swiped the card?
He reaches his arm out and wraps it around my waist, guiding me back downstairs.
As I walk, I step to the side, out of his reach.
I don’t want him to touch me. I like it too much when he touches me, and I don’t want to put my heart at risk like that.
Sleeping with him last night was a huge mistake that I want to avoid making again.
For him it’s just sex - for me - it’s too intimate. It provokes my feelings.
But my efforts to avoid him are useless because he just moves closer again and presses his hand against my lower back as he leads me to the kitchen.
Two pizza boxes are sitting on the kitchen counter. I move to lift the lid to peek at what he ordered. I hope there isn’t any pineapple on here. Although - clearly, we aren’t soulmates or anything, he would like pineapple.
I laugh at my thought.
Mas steps close to me and leans over to peek at the pizza too. Then in one movement too quick for me to escape - he wraps his hands around my hips and lifts me onto the kitchen counter. I sit there bewildered for a second, my feet hanging off the side.
“I think we can just eat in here. Do you want salt or that spicy sauce?”
“Um. Salt. Um - yes, the spicy sauce too.”
He fetches both and opens the lids of both boxes - sitting them next to each other near me so I can pick which one I want.
He hands me the salt and I sprinkle some on top, while he splashes the chili sauce over both.
Then - to my horror he picks up a slice, leans against the counter between my legs - and offers me a bite.
I lean back so fast I knock my head on the cupboard behind me.
He chuckles. But thankfully he steps away.
“Here you go.” He says, handing it to me from where he is now leaning against the counter next to me.
I take a deep breath, trying to focus on how good the pizza is.
He’s being very touchy - very affectionate.
Is this his way of saying he wants sex again?
I want to distract him or change the subject.
So, I do something stupid and bring up the money I spent today, knowing it will put an end to him being so nice.
“Do you get notifications when I spend money on your card?” I ask, because he for whatever reason - doesn’t get them or didn’t check them yet.
“Yes. Why do you ask?”
“Oh. So, you checked them today.” He can’t have.
“Yes, I saw the notifications.” He looks confused. And now I am confused.
“Oh.”
“Why are you asking, Leo?”
“Um - because - I spent a lot .” I blurt out.
He laughs. “Was that a lot?”
What the fuck? He isn’t bothered at all.
I stop talking and start stuffing my face with pizza to prevent myself from asking more questions. My mind is chaotic with confused thoughts pushing in from all directions. He doesn’t mind at all that I spent that much. He’s being affectionate. He’s being sweet and talking to me.
Suddenly I feel overwhelmed and terrified that I am going to start falling in love with him again - still - fuck .
“I’m full. Thanks for the pizza.” I say quickly, sliding off the counter. I have to get away from him. This is so bad.
“Do you want something to drink?”
“Nope.”
I run out of the kitchen before he can say another word.
I bolt up to my bedroom, closing the door, and leaning against it - shaking my head in disbelief.