Chapter 35 #2
I never considered the alternative. As much as I’ve thought about everything here being too expensive and harder and harder for locals to afford, at least our town still exists.
I pop another chip in my mouth contemplating that when another wave of flavor hits me. I close my eyes and I’m not even embarrassed that I moan a little.
Sutton laughs and I shoot him a glare. “OK, seriously, why are these so good?”
He looks at me with a sheepish grin. I immediately recognize it as the proud one that reminds me of the night we met, when he was showing me the pictures of food on his phone that I was worried would be dick pics.
“Let’s see… I used local organic potatoes, from the other side of the pass in Idaho, and cut them to just the perfect thickness.
That helps a lot, but really it’s the duck fat I saved from the restaurant that I fried them in. That makes them so damn delicious.”
“That’s it?” I tease. “You say that like it’s so simple.”
He shrugs and holds up his thumb and forefinger. “I might have added a teensy bit of truffle oil too, just for a little razzle dazzle.”
I eat another chip and damnit, there it is. Even something as simple as potato chips are a culinary adventure when he wants to make it one. He has every right to be proud, he’s earned his reputation.
“That’s why you’re going to earn a star one day.
” I grab the half-sized bottle of Champagne he also brought and take a sip straight from it.
His eyes linger on my lips, making my skin heat, and my tongue darts over them to catch a stray drop of the bubbly drink. “So, is food why you left New Mexico?”
He rocks his head side to side. “I always loved spending time in the kitchen with Grandma, but when Slade left town to go to culinary school… I wanted to be just like him back then, and yeah, I just kind of followed along in his footsteps.”
He pauses and looks off into the distance, and I shamelessly admire his profile with the blue sky and granite mountains behind him.
I grab one of the paprika chips he made, and I have to admit they’re good too.
He notices it because he looks back at me.
“So what’s the verdict? The classic American favorite?
Or do the European inspired ones pull off the upset? ”
“Oh, sour cream and onion will always win. But these—” I munch on another paprika chip, “—are my new second favorite.”
“That’s high praise from you. I’ll take second place as a compliment.”
I rest my head on his shoulder and look out over the town below. “So what about now? Would you ever want to move back?”
I feel his hand intertwine with mine. “I’ll always love it there, but I feel like I’ve outgrown it.
I still want to chase that star I think too.
” He turns to look at me. “You know? Unfinished business I guess? I think more than anything now, I just want a place that’s my home—a place I built that’s out of the shadow of my family. ”
I nod and part of me feels a bit of relief knowing that he’s not dying to leave Jackson, at least not for now.
“You’ve been asking a lot of questions today. When do I get my turn, Shadow?” He reaches down and this time, he flicks a chip at my mouth. I open my mouth just in time for it to land on my tongue.
His brows raise and he nods approvingly.
I finish the chip and nod. “I guess it’s your turn. Ask away.”
He rubs circles on the back of my hand. “What’s long-term look like for you? I hope it doesn’t look like what you’re doing now.”
I glare at him. “What is that supposed to mean? I love what I do.”
“Shit,” he says, scrubbing his hand over his face when a hint of red creeps up his neck. “That’s not what I meant. I just know you’re working so hard, and I get that you never want to leave this place, but I also know what burnout looks like.”
I cock my head at him. “And what does that look like exactly?”
“I’ve been watching my brother for the last six months.
He won’t say it, but I think he’s hanging on by a thread.
I hate seeing anyone do that to themselves, especially if they don’t have to.
” He squares himself to me and I can see the worry in those soulful eyes.
It nearly makes my breath hitch because having his full attention focused on me makes me squirm and feel anxious even though I know he means well by it.
He wraps his arm around me and pulls me back into his side.
My head naturally finds its way back to his shoulder.
He sighs and I can feel the tension leave his body.
“I’m sorry. I just wanted you to know you’re not alone.
I’ve seen people work hard. Making it in the service industry as long as you have and still loving it, that takes passion and drive. You’re doing amazing.”
His fingers trace along the hem of my shorts and the bare skin there. I grab his hand and squeeze because that is probably one of the nicest things someone has ever said to me.
“Thanks. That means a lot.” He turns enough to kiss the top of my head.
I don’t know if it’s the charming picnic or a lingering post-orgasm moment of clarity, but I do want to share more with him.
So I take a deep breath and do just that.
“To answer your question though—what long-term looks like for me—I don’t know.
I want to get ahead, but it’s hard enough to just stay afloat.
It feels like if you don’t own your business or have a stake in one, you’ll never get ahead. ”
He lifts his head up and looks at me. “Have you ever thought about that? It takes passion and drive, but I’ve watched you enough to know you have the kind it takes to run your own place.”
I chuckle, partly to avoid the blush creeping over my cheeks at yet another sincere compliment and partly because that idea is insane.
“I’d love to, but with what money? You know that saying, ‘it takes money to make money’?
Not all of us have former rockstars to help fund their fancy new restaurants. ”
“Sorry, I just wanted you to know I think you’d be great at running your own place if you ever wanted.
” He squints and looks off into the distance like he’s thinking about something, but doesn’t say anything else.
He just rubs his chin which forces me to look at those dimples that almost make me forget what we’re even talking about.
“I thought we said no more apologies?”
He laughs through his nose. “Fair enough.”
His eyes find mine and a moment passes where we just sit in silence, enjoying the perfect summer day and the date that I would have loved just as much two years ago. He leans in to kiss me when a buzzing sound interrupts us.
He groans and looks down at the phone on the blanket. I peck a quick kiss on his cheek. "Do you need to check that?”
“No.” He shakes his head. “It’s probably just one of my siblings and if it were an actual emergency, I’d probably be getting called by one of them, if not all three of them and my parents.”
“You really do a lot for them, even from here, don’t you?”
He shrugs. “My younger brother says I have a hero complex.”
"You absolutely have a hero complex.”
He rolls his eyes. “Yes, well you didn’t let me get to the part where I’ve recently started to realize Sly is probably right.” He sighs. “I just want to help the people I love. I’m just not good at setting boundaries or respecting them most of the time.”
I hum to myself and nod. “You mean like stealing someone’s car and driving it ten hours away?” I give him a knowing look, but he just flashes a smug grin right back.
“Maybe, but I’d do it again.”
“So what do you think your family wants today?” I pop a couple more chips into my mouth.
“There’s a ninety-five percent chance that it’s just Slade bugging me about the restaurant in Seattle or it's Sisi.”
“Oh yeah, her wedding is coming up, right?”
“Yeah, it’s a few weeks away,” he says with an unconvincing smile. “About that.” He holds his hands together in his lap and for once I see a hint of doubt in his eyes. “Would you want to come with me? As my date? I know it’s last minute, but I’d love for you to come to Sterling Springs.”
I point a finger at my chest. “You want me to be your date at your sister’s wedding? Like meet your whole family and everything?”
He smiles and scrunches his shoulders and it’s actually frustratingly cute seeing him be unsure like this.
“Actually, Sisi sort of insisted I invite you because she is dying to meet you. And selfishly, I want you there too. I don’t know if I can handle being away from you again so soon.
TJ and Grace will also be there. But, if that’s too much too soon, I get—”
“I’d love to go and see where you’re from. I’ll talk with Monica and see if I can move my shifts around for a few days off.”
“Really?” His smile lights up and even if I’m slightly terrified of meeting his family, it feels like something I want to do with him—for him. It’s the least I can do considering everything he’s done for me.
“Yeah, really. The idea of seeing your family torment you actually sounds kind of fun.”
“Thank you. I can’t wait for you to meet all of them, even if they are a bit much.” He leans in and presses a kiss to my lips. When he breaks the kiss, his kind eyes melt my heart again, reminding me that my feelings for him are something I haven’t felt for anyone else before.