24. CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
“Jesse!”
I hum and roll over, pulling the comforter high around my neck and hugging the excess.
“Stop it! No!”
Mostly asleep, I groan. Unsure if I’m dreaming.
“Jesse!”
I rub my face, certain I heard something that time.
“Don’t touch him!”
Fuck! That was Kai!
Leaping out of bed, I’m in the hallway before I know it.
His voice is loud, but he isn’t screaming. It’s more desperate.
I press my ear to the wood, close my eyes, and will him to settle. Conscious that waking him is the worst thing I can do, but knowing how much damage he can inflict upon himself.
The air stills, and I breathe a sigh of relief.
Pressing off the door, I’m back against it in a flash, mindlessly running my hand over its surface as though it will help him as hollow thuds pound at my chest.
“I’m here. I’m here,” I whisper.
“I said, don’t touch him!”
“It’s okay, Kai. Nobody is hurting me,” I tell him as calmly as I can, hoping my words can penetrate his nightmare.
“Please. He’s done nothing wrong. He doesn’t even know them.”
“Kai, I’m right here. Nothing is wrong. You’re just dreaming and it’ll be over soon.”
“Out of the way, Jesse.”
I whip my head towards Alma and shoot her a look that says, not a chance in hell, sweetheart.
“Let me in,” she repeats when I won’t move.
Turning to face her, I cover the handle so she can’t unlock it. “You’re not going in there.”
“Yes, I am.”
“Why—”
“Jesse!”
“Sure doesn’t sound like he’s crying for you.”
“Just move. You don’t understand.”
“I understand enough.”
Alma elbow-jabs me in the side with another of her crazy Columbian fighting moves. “Get out of my way.”
I grunt, but hold my ground. “You can either give me the key, or you can fuck off. Cause there’s no way I’m letting you past.”
“I have to be in there.”
Notwithstanding her penchant for rule following, Alma doesn’t strike me as someone who is intrinsically malicious. So I can’t help but feel this is her way of holding onto something she has no control over.
“Are you dating him?” I inquire boldly, knowing the answer. And the aggravation of her stare proves how spiteful of me it is to ask. “Is he still fucking you?” Alma’s lips purse and her breaths deepen. “You better not be waking—”
“I’d never do that!” she snaps.
“So, why do you need to be in there so badly?”
“I…”
“Stop! Leave him alone!”
“I…” Alma laments. “I clean up and put him back to bed.”
I scowl at her. “Are you fucking serious?” Now, his abject terror makes all the sense in the world. Why wouldn’t he refuse the revelation when he was tricked into believing he was still doing fine?
“He doesn’t need to know.”
“Like fuck he doesn’t. How do you think it’s better for him not to know? That… That’s screwed up, Alma.”
“You don’t know what he needs?”
“Judging by the look on his face when I mentioned it to him, neither do you. How is he meant to cope if he can’t accept it?”
“Look, Jesse. You haven’t been here long enough—”
“No! You look here, Alma. I don’t want you letting yourself into Kai’s room anymore. Not unless you hear it from his mouth that it’s what he wants. I don’t know what you might have had together, but it’s over now.”
“What? And you think you’re special enough? You’re a man. He isn’t interested in you. It’s just the act he puts on to scare asshole guys away so they don’t hurt him.”
“I’m pretty sure that’s not your story to tell.”
Alma inches backwards, knowing she slipped up. “Please don’t repeat that.”
“I won’t. If you promise to not let yourself in anymore.”
Her jaw clicks from side to side as she backs further away. Her role of protector no longer exists, because I claimed it this afternoon when I saw the dismay on his face and the horror in his eyes. Alma had already lost before she grabbed her keys.
Kai is mine.
He belonged to me the second our lips touched.
It hasn’t been a game since then because he’s not something I’m prepared to lose.
Defeated, Alma spins on her heel and storms off heartbroken.
Returning to Kai’s door, I listen for several minutes until I’m sure he’s settled, then scribble another note for him.