Chapter Thirteen
Julian’s laptop screen illuminated Cillian’s third-floor quarters as he uploaded the final tunnel schematic to the secure server.
The room was larger than Julian’s entire apartment, but it followed a similar theme to the rest of the living quarters.
There were exposed brick walls and floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the warehouse district, but more importantly, and to Julian more significantly, a bed that could accommodate Cillian’s massive frame with room to spare.
Its mere presence was distracting in a positive way.
“The files are transferred,” Julian announced, closing the laptop. “Thorn has everything now.”
Cillian stood by the window, silhouetted against the city lights. His shadows pooled around his feet, restless. “Good. That’s good.”
Julian studied his mate’s rigid posture. Cillian had been tense since they’d left the tactical room three hours ago, his barely held control stretched thin to the point of breaking. The mate bond pulsed between them - Julian could feel Cillian’s need like static electricity before a storm.
“You’re still processing the alley,” Julian observed.
Cillian’s shoulders tightened. “I lost it. You saw…”
“I saw you protect me with overwhelming efficiency.” Julian set the laptop aside and stood. “Your response was proportionate to the threat level. Three armed assailants with demonstrated willingness to use lethal force. Your escalation was justified.”
“I tore them apart.” Cillian’s voice dropped to something rough and ancient. “I wanted to make it last. Make them suffer for touching you.”
“They hurt me first. Cause and effect.” Julian crossed the room until he stood directly behind Cillian. “You’re catastrophizing because you’re worried I’m afraid to be alone with you. I’m not. We established this in the alley.”
Cillian turned, and his eyes were pure void - no grey, just endless black. “You should be afraid. What I am, what I’m capable of…”
“Is clearly exactly what I need.” Julian reached up and touched Cillian’s jaw, feeling the barely contained power thrumming beneath human skin. “You’re an apex predator whose primary drive is protecting his mate. That’s not frightening, that’s logical.”
The shadows around Cillian’s feet surged upward, wrapping around Julian’s ankles, seeking the connection.
“They want to touch you,” Cillian said roughly. “I want to touch you. I’ve been trying to be careful, to court you properly, but after today…”
“After today, you need physical confirmation that I’m safe.” Julian tilted his head. “That’s a reasonable biological response to threat-induced stress. The mate bond is demanding reassurance.”
“Julian…”
“I want you to touch me,” Julian stated it as fact, clear and direct. “I’ve wanted that since the coffee shop. Possibly since the alley where we met, though my cognitive framework for that desire was underdeveloped at the time.”
Cillian made a sound between a growl and a groan. His shadows climbed higher, wrapping around Julian’s calves, his thighs. One tendril curved around his waist while Cillian remained frozen two feet away.
“See? Even your shadows know what they need.” Julian looked down at the cool darkness caressing his body. “They’re more honest than you are right now.”
“I’m trying to be gentle. I refuse to overwhelm you.”
“I don’t require gentleness. I require honesty and clear communication.” Julian met those void-black eyes. “Do you want to touch me?”
“More than I want to exist.”
“Then touch me.”
Cillian closed the distance in one fluid movement, his hands framing Julian’s face with unexpected tenderness. His shadows were wrapped tighter, dozens of points of contact all at once - ankle, calf, thigh, waist, wrist. Julian’s breath caught at the sensation.
“Too much?” Cillian’s voice was strained.
“No.” Julian leaned into the touch. “But we should establish parameters.”
A huff of surprised laughter. “Of course you want parameters.”
“Clear boundaries prevent misunderstandings.” Julian considered the shadows currently exploring his body with curious insistence. “The shadows can touch anywhere except my ass. That’s your territory exclusively, if and when we get there. Everything else is acceptable.”
Cillian’s pupils dilated until his eyes were entirely black. “You’re giving my shadows permission to touch you.”
“They’re already touching me. I’m establishing consent boundaries.” Julian gasped as a shadow curled around his throat - not squeezing, just resting there like a collar. “Is that an acknowledgment of your claim?”
“Yes.” Cillian’s thumb traced Julian’s jaw. “They’re claiming what’s theirs. What’s mine.”
“Technically, I’m claiming you, too. The mate bond is reciprocal.”
“Julian.” Cillian’s forehead pressed against his. “I have to take you to bed. Not for sex, just…I need to touch you. I need to know you’re safe.”
Julian’s heart rate elevated. A definite arousal response. “Yes.”
Cillian lifted him effortlessly, the shadows supporting Julian’s weight as Cillian carried him to the massive bed. He laid Julian down carefully, then followed him onto the mattress. The shadows never released their hold, dozens of cool tendrils caressing Julian’s skin through his clothes.
“Can I take your sweater off?” Cillian asked, his voice rough.
“Yes. All my clothes, if you want.”
Cillian’s hands shook as he pushed Julian’s sweater up. “Not all. Not yet. I’m barely holding my instincts back as it is.”
Julian lifted his arms, letting Cillian pull the sweater over his head. The shadows immediately wrapped around his bare torso, mapping every inch of exposed skin. Julian arched into the touch, his breath coming faster.
“You like that.” Cillian’s eyes tracked every reaction. “You like the shadows touching you.”
“It’s novel. Stimulating.” Julian’s hands found Cillian’s shoulders, anchoring himself. “You’re not touching me enough, though. The shadows are doing all the work.”
Cillian made a pained sound. “I’m trying not to devour you.”
“Devouring sounds efficient.”
“Julian…”
“Touch me, Cillian. That’s what you need. What we both need.”
Cillian’s control snapped. His hands mapped Julian’s chest, his ribs, his stomach - every inch of visible skin. His shadows continued their exploration, one wrapping around Julian’s throat, others circling his wrists, his ankles. Claiming and cataloging simultaneously.
“Four thousand years,” Cillian said hoarsely, his hands trembling against Julian’s skin. “Four thousand years, and I’ve never wanted anything. I never felt desire. Then you walked into that alley and looked at me like I made sense.”
Julian’s fingers threaded through Cillian’s hair. “You do make sense. You’re the only thing that does.”
Cillian lowered his head, pressing his face against Julian’s chest, right over his heart. His shadows tightened their hold - they weren’t being restrictive, they were showing they could be protective. Julian felt surrounded, claimed, and completely secure.
“Your heart is racing,” Cillian murmured against his skin.
“It’s an elevated arousal response, which is a normal physiological reaction for humans.” Julian tugged Cillian’s hair until his mate looked up. “I want more.”
“More?”
“More touch. More contact. You said you wanted to bring me pleasure.” Julian met those void-black eyes. “So do it.”
Cillian’s exhale was shaky. “You’re going to destroy me.”
“Reciprocal destruction. The mate bond is symmetrical.”
A shadow curled around Julian’s ankle and tugged, spreading his legs slightly. Another wrapped around his wrist, pinning it gently to the mattress. Julian’s breath hitched as more shadows joined them, mapping his body with curious insistence.
“They’re restraining you,” Cillian observed, his voice dropping to something ancient and possessive. “Holding you down so I can touch you properly.”
“Is that what you want? To hold me down?”
“I want everything. I want to wrap you in shadows until nothing can touch you but me. I want to taste every inch of your skin. I need to make you come undone until you can’t remember why you ever thought you didn’t fit anywhere.
” Cillian’s hand splayed across Julian’s stomach.
“But I’ll settle for learning what makes you feel good. ”
Julian arched up into the touch. “Then learn.”
Cillian’s mouth found Julian’s throat, kissing and tasting while his shadows continued their exploration. One tendril brushed Julian’s nipple, and he gasped, his body jerking against the restraints.
“There,” Cillian growled. “That’s a sensitive spot.”
The shadow circled Julian’s nipple again, then the other, alternating between them. Cillian’s mouth moved lower, following the path his shadows had already mapped. When his lips closed around one nipple, Julian’s back arched off the bed.
“Fuck,” Julian gasped, his usual vocabulary failing him.
“Language,” Cillian teased against his skin. “Where’s all that precise terminology now?”
“Currently unavailable due to sensory overload.” Julian tugged against the shadow restraints, testing them. They held firm but didn’t hurt. “This is extremely effective.”
“Good.” Cillian’s hand traced down Julian’s stomach to the waistband of his jeans. “Can I?”
“Yes. All of it, yes.”
Cillian made quick work of Julian’s jeans, sliding them down his legs with shadows helping to lift and maneuver. Julian lay there in just his boxer briefs, shadows wrapped around every available inch of skin, Cillian hovering above him with eyes like endless night.
“You’re beautiful,” Cillian said roughly. “Perfect. Mine.”
“Yours,” Julian agreed. “And you’re mine. That’s how this works.”
Cillian’s hand traced the line of Julian’s hip, his erection obvious through the thin fabric. “I want to taste you and make you fall apart. Can I?”
Julian’s brain processed the question through a haze of arousal. Cillian was asking permission to go down on him. The clinical terminology helped him focus.
“Yes. But I should warn you, I have limited experience with oral sex. My previous partners found me too analytical during intimacy.”
“I find your analytical approach arousing.” Cillian pressed a kiss to Julian’s hip. “And I’m going to prove it.”
The shadows around Julian’s thighs tightened, spreading his legs wider. Cillian settled between them, his broad shoulders forcing Julian even more open. The vulnerability should have been uncomfortable, but Julian only felt safe. Claimed. Exactly where he belonged.
Cillian mouthed Julian through his boxer briefs, and Julian’s hips jerked up involuntarily. The shadows held him down, preventing movement while Cillian explored at his own pace.
“The restraint serves dual purposes.” Julian barely managed to form the thought necessary for speech. “It prevents me from interfering with your process while also providing deep pressure stimulation that enhances arousal.”
Cillian looked up, his eyes gleaming. “Keep talking. I love hearing your brain work while I take you apart.”
He pulled Julian’s boxer briefs down, and Julian was completely bare. Shadows immediately wrapped around his cock, cool and curious, making him gasp.
“They want to touch you here, too,” Cillian observed. “They will learn what makes you feel good.”
“They can touch – oh, fuck.” Julian’s carefully maintained vocabulary shattered as Cillian’s mouth closed around him, hot and wet and absolutely overwhelming. The contrast between the cool shadows and Cillian’s heat was devastating.
Cillian worked him with single-minded focus, his shadows caressing every other part of Julian’s body while his mouth reduced Julian to incoherent gasps. When a shadow brushed against his entrance - not penetrating, just acknowledging - Julian nearly came apart.
“Not there yet,” Cillian murmured, pulling back slightly. “But eventually. When you’re ready, I’m going to fill you with shadows while I’m inside you, and make you feel claimed everywhere at once.”
“That’s…” Julian couldn’t finish the thought. His brain was short-circuiting, too much sensation all at once.
“That’s what?” Cillian’s tongue traced a slight ridge along Julian’s length.
“Highly effective dirty talk.”
Cillian laughed, the vibration traveling through Julian’s entire body. “Only you would critique the technique while I’m sucking your cock.”
“I’m complimenting the technique. There’s a distinction.”
“Julian.” Cillian’s voice dropped to pure gravel. “Stop thinking and just feel.”
Then his mouth returned, and Julian stopped thinking entirely.