Chapter 4 #2
Richard nodded. “I have seen it many times in London. You, who want to be left alone, are suddenly surrounded by a press of ladies batting their eyelashes and swishing their fans to capture your attention. While Bingley loves it, you do not.”
“You do, too, Richard. But you are correct. This time, however, the truth was that Mrs. Bennet threw her eldest at Bingley, a lady my friend delighted to catch. Then, she backed away, not attempting to push any of her four remaining girls at me. At the time, I was relieved. Now that I think about it, her conduct was odd. I was a single man with a fortune at my fingertips, and she did nothing to draw me in.”
“All five daughters are out?”
“They are. Miss Bennet, I guess, is near Bingley’s age.
The youngest is the same age as Georgiana.
For certain, all five do not possess the accomplishments that so many ladies in our sphere acquire from birth.
Their father is indolent in his care of the family estate and in overseeing the future of his daughters.
Their mother is vulgar. But Elizabeth and her elder sister have risen above these challenges.
They are ladies through and through.” Darcy sighed.
“Hmm.” Richard filled their cups. After sitting across from Darcy, he said, “That had to be hard on you, having Bingley show you up for the first time.”
“What? No. Not at all.” Darcy fumed. “That never crossed my mind. I just wanted out of the assembly. I wanted privacy and quiet. Had I not known that Miss Bingley would have followed me back to Netherfield Park, I would have called for the carriage and left. Bingley was welcome to all the attention he could get.”
“I see.” Richard sipped his tea. “How did Miss Elizabeth react the next time you saw her?”
Closing his eyes, Darcy easily recalled the scene.
“We were at Lucas Lodge, the former home of Mrs. Collins. It was quickly evident that the two eldest Miss Bennets and Miss Charlotte Lucas were intimates. Bingley singled out Jane Bennet like he was a sheepdog, and she was the prized lamb. Miss Elizabeth and Miss Lucas remained together the whole of the night. When Miss Lucas’s father requested that I dance with Miss Elizabeth, she refused me by saying she had no intention of dancing.
Since her younger sisters were making a spectacle of themselves, I assumed she was attempting to set a good example by tempering her natural desires to participate in hopes of restoring Miss Kitty and Miss Lydia to better behavior.
I now know that she truly did not want to stand up with me. ”
“You really made a muddle out of this, Darce.”
“You do not know the half.”
“Then tell me.”
Darcy huffed. “Elizabeth is exceedingly kind, with a gentleness that draws me to her. Her mind is quick. She is not mean-spirited. I sense that injustice angers her deeply as it does me. When she smiles, which is often, her eyes light up like the sun.”
“Thus, your insult would have cut her deeply.”
Darcy hung his head. “Yes.”
“I am curious. Did she ever accept your offer for a dance?”
“She did not. Bingley held a ball on the last evening we were in Hertfordshire. Because of an injury she sustained while walking a particularly rough path at Netherfield Park, Miss Elizabeth did not attend.”
Quietly, his cousin asked, “So you never had the privilege of holding her hand. That is too bad.”
Standing, Darcy moved to the window overlooking Rosings Park’s massive gardens.
“I not only held her hand, but I also held her in my arms when I carried her back to the house after she fell on the path. With her hands wrapped around my neck and her head resting on my shoulder, I…well, I realized how well her heartbeat was in tandem with mine. I liked her before her fall. But at that minute, I felt the beginning of love for the first time in my adult life.”
“What did you do then?”
“I requested the attendance of her father so I could honorably offer my hand in marriage.”
Richard’s eyebrows shot up almost to his hairline. “You are betrothed?”
“Not only did she refuse to dance with me. She soundly refused to marry me.”
His cousin’s mouth gaped open.
“I, too, was shocked beyond belief.” Tracing a pattern on the carpet with the toe of his boot, Darcy continued.
“She was injured. Her pain must have been incredible. I thought she lashed out because of this. Two weeks later, at the ball, I discovered from a crass comment made by her youngest sister that Elizabeth Bennet had no love for me at all, that she did not even like me. The next morning, I left for London with no intention of ever seeing her again.”
“How is that working out for you, Darcy? Here you are. And here she is.”
“Yes, she is here.” Darcy sighed. “For four months, I tried everything to purge her from my mind and heart, but not once since late November has anyone else tempted me in the slightest. I find myself comparing others to her, and they always fall short. As it is, all it took was one glance two days ago to realize that I was done searching for my mate. I only want her. Need her.”
“Well, Darce, it sounds like Miss Elizabeth does not want or need you.”
“I know.” He rubbed the discomfort from his chest.
“What are you going to do about it? Just know that whatever you plan, I will support you. However, Lady Catherine and Anne will not. You are walking along a dangerous line here at Rosings Park, trying to court someone under our aunt and cousin’s noses.
Are you sure that this is the best field of battle?
Would it not be better to wait until you are back in London, or could you return to Hertfordshire when the lady goes home? ”
“This is the only opportunity I have, Richard. I will not pass up this chance to make a better second impression.”
“Might I ask what you talk about during your walks?”
“Talk?” Darcy was flummoxed. “Like me, she enjoys silence when walking out of doors. We are each unwilling to speak unless we expect to say something that will amaze the whole room and be handed down to posterity with all the éclat of a proverb.”
“Of you, I can believe this, Darcy. Of her? I do not know her. With that said, it sounds as if you do not know her well either.”
“I intend to remedy that neglect.”
“You have already walked with her twice by your own account. Do not wait too long, Cousin. Seize the day.”
Carpe diem!