The Second Weddins #4
They use the same rings, because even when they weren’t together, they kept them.
What is my reason ? V wonders. But as she and J walk into the reception, she says, “That was sweet.”
J wonders if she noticed anything wrong, anything off. She has no frame of reference—this is her first time seeing George.
He doesn’t say anything. Not for the first time, and not for the last, he wonders whether love, for all its complications, is really very simple. Even though there may be dozens or hundreds of reasons to say no, you say yes to it, and that is that.
He’s already picked up the place cards, so he leads V over to Table 2. When they get there, he sees that V has been seated between him and Tom. He wants to alter this arrangement, but he knows Tom must have planned it this way and will notice if it veers.
“Well, this isn’t awkward,” he murmurs.
“What?” V asks as she seats herself.
“Nothing,” he says. The woman to his left arrives, a flight attendant who’s known Lisbet “longer than you’ve been alive.
” The table fills, then falls into conversation, many of the guests tallying how many of George and Lisbet’s weddings they’ve been to.
Tom is the last to arrive, his nervousness badly masked by his attempts at good spirits.
“It’s lovely to see you again, V,” he says once he’s sat down and his napkin is in his lap.
“Oh?” V replies. “Have we met?”
With a sense of dread, J can see that Tom doesn’t realize she’s joking.
“Why yes,” Tom sputters. “We—”
V offers a forgive-me smile. “I know. I just couldn’t resist.”
Tom isn’t laughing. Instead he looks like he’s just been startled by a camera’s flash.
“Oh, I see,” he murmurs.
“I don’t understand,” the woman to J’s left says. “Do you know each other or not?”
It is noticeable to all three of them that neither J, V, nor Tom jumps in with “It’s a funny story...” J waits to see how Tom or V will answer. V waits to see how Tom will answer.
Tom finally says, “Yes, we’ve met. But it was some time ago.”
“And how long have the two of you been together?” the woman asks J and V.
V answers, “For some time.”
J has never felt guilty about how he and V met, only awkward.
It was clear even on that night that the chemistry wasn’t there between her and Tom, and nothing that J has learned since has led him to believe that she and Tom would have made a good pair.
When he and V had reconnected, he’d even checked with Tom to make sure it was okay, and Tom had said no blessing was required.
It’s true that J had avoided them going out as a trio in the intervening two years.
..but he hadn’t hesitated to invite Tom to group activities where V would also be.
Tom never said yes. Not, he assured J, because of V’s presence.
J now feels maybe he should have forced the issue a little earlier, so the reunion, as it was, wouldn’t occur at a table set for ten.
Both Tom and V are looking at him now, each expecting something from him that he can’t discern.
All he can do is turn to the woman on his left and ask her which airports are her favorites.
Ten minutes later, he is in the middle of hearing about a carnal free-for-all in a Hyatt by LAX when the wedding planner comes over and tells him the speeches are about to start; he is on directly after.
George and Lisbet take their place at the microphone, George in his ill-fitting tuxedo, Lisbet in a dress the color of a carnation and the cut of a rose. George has to say “Hello everyone” three times before the guests quiet down. He turns aside to cough away from the mic, then comes back on.
“Hello! I just wanted to say—” (another cough) “—how grateful I am that you’ve joined us today.
I realize that our approach to marriage—” (two coughs, then an abashed smile) “—isn’t particularly conventional.
We must seem like two of the most fickle people in the world.
But I’ll tell you, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
A lot of people have asked, why now? Why again?
Well, I’m gonna tell you: The older you get, the more you understand what you like, and the more you understand that you should be spending your time on what you like, not all the other crap.
You know what I mean?” (Pause for breath; J sees many of the older guests nodding—one even calls out “Yes, we do!”) “This lady beside me—she and I have had good times, and we’ve had hard times.
But there’s a difference between hard times and bad times, and lately I’ve been realizing how hard times can bring out some of the best times, when it comes to what love is worth.
So here we are. I won’t promise you this is the last time, because life has demonstrated that it doesn’t give a damn what I think.
But if I can’t control what life does to me or any of us, I can certainly choose who I want to spend it with.
Sometimes she gives me grief, and a lot of the time I deserve it.
But when she knows I can’t take it—well, there’s no one who’s ever been more on my side.
The love of my life, four times and counting. Here’s to having cause to celebrate.”
He raises a toast, and the room rings out with the clink of glasses, like wind chimes announcing the breeze of a new morning.
Lisbet then steps to the microphone and says, “I don’t know I have anything to add to that.
We know who our true friends are—and they’re here in the room with us.
And George’s children, of course, who are scattered all over the globe and couldn’t be present.
I know they’re sending their love, and I’m also so glad to have Tom here with us.
Anyone who’s been to all of our weddings will be receiving a bread maker—I’m not kidding about this!
—and Tom’s will be the most deluxe bread maker we can find.
” There’s some laughter. Tom blushes and looks down at his plate.
“Now,” Lisbet continues, “we have quite a treat for you. One of Tom’s longtime friends is an internationally acclaimed performer, filling concert halls and stadiums. Even though I’m sure he could be playing to a much, much larger crowd than this, he is here to debut a song he’s written just for George and me.
We haven’t heard it yet, so we’re as excited as you to hear it.
You’ve already given him one ovation today, but please put your hands together again for. ..our wedding singer!”
It is with a profound unease that J gets up from his seat.
Not because he’s been introduced on false pretenses (he’s never played a stadium), but because he knows the song he’s written is wrong for this moment.
It does not match the bragging glee with which Lisbet has welcomed him forward.
It does not match the deep breath George is taking, and the trouble he seems to have standing for so long.
It does not acknowledge that hard times can bring on the best times, a phrase that J can’t get out of his head.
It is never a good idea for singers to try to explain away a song before they sing it. J looks to V for some help, but she’s clapping along with everyone else, even though she knows what’s in the song—how can she seem so supportive, so ready for him to open his mouth?
J picks up his guitar and gives himself a thirty-second-long grace period of tuning before he says anything. Then he steps to the mic and begins.
“It’s so wonderful to be here, to celebrate with Lisbet and George.
I’ve known Tom since I was a boy, and when I met him, George was already on the scene.
I wanted to write a song that...celebrated the magnet that keeps drawing them back together.
Because most couples...at a certain point they don’t even question what they have, and whether they want to have it.
But Lisbet and George—they are always questioning it.
And the answer is always the love that leads to us being here today. ”
He looks at George, who gives him a thumbs-up. Lisbet is impatient, wanting him to start singing.
J takes a deep breath. After the exhale, he says, “Okay. This is called ‘Still in Love with You.’”
I tried not thinking of you
cause the thought was a truck
parked uphill, handbrake almost loose
keys still in the lock
I know that it’s been years since we were through
But I’m still in love with you
I tried not thinking of you
Cause you were an empty casket
A silhouette outlined with chalk
covered by a blanket
a crime scene I keep returning to
I’m still in love with you
And when you try to not think of something
You can only think of that thing
The one thing people tell me I shouldn’t do
But I don’t care what they say
I no longer want to be saved
there’s not a cure in this world I wouldn’t refuse
If I go down at least I want to go down with you
I know that it’s been years since we were through
But I’m still in love with you
I can’t stop thinking of you
He repeats the last chorus once, twice. George looks like he is struggling to breathe.
Lisbet looks as if she doesn’t know whether to be angry or pleased.
Tom is glaring at him— What are you doing ?
V is glancing around at other people’s reactions.
He’s still playing, so they haven’t hit that moment yet, where people will either applaud or not.
In his heart, J knows he can’t stop. No one is laughing—at least he’s honored that request—but no one is smiling, either.
So J keeps playing. He makes it look like the song hasn’t ended. He changes his chords around. He reaches for something, anything, that can give him an exit from this moment.
And then, God help him, recalling the song that brought George and Lisbet so much joy two weddings ago, he starts singing Shania Twain’s “You’re Still the One.”
He actually starts on the second verse, because he doesn’t remember there’s a first verse.
Looks like we made it
Look how far we’ve come, my baby