Chapter 13
Sophia
“ I can’t believe him!” Sophia groaned as she paced in front of her friend.
Emma laughed. “That’s funny because I thought he made some good points.”
Sophia whirled around and glowered at her friend. “What points? He hasn’t made any points.”
Her friend snickered again. “Think about it, Soph. He’s cleared up the confusion with what happened in Texas, and he’s still clearly interested. You can’t tell me you don’t like him back. Otherwise you wouldn’t be acting this way.”
“Acting what way?” Sophia muttered as she dropped into a chair on the porch. “I’m not doing anything I haven’t been doing since you’ve met me.” When Emma didn’t respond right away, Sophia glanced at her once more. The pointed look she gave her was enough for Sophia to demand, “What?”
Emma shrugged. “You don’t really believe that, do you?”
Sophia bit down on her lower lip before she frowned. Was she so easy to read?
“You like him.”
Sophia scoffed.
“You really like him,” Emma sang.
“What’s not to like? He’s charming, and he’s attractive.”
“ But …” Emma drawled.
There were no “buts.” Sophia and Emma both knew it. The problem wasn’t with Cameron; it was with Sophia. She swallowed hard and peeked at her. “He’s my friend.”
Emma snorted, earning a sharp look from Sophia.
“You keep telling yourself that. Seriously, Sophia. The guy is so your type. He’s tall, built, and has just enough of an accent to make a girl’s legs weak.
I don’t understand why you can’t just give him a chance.
And don’t tell me that you’re not interested in anything serious.
No one wants to be alone forever. Not even you. ”
“I can’t.” The words slipped past Sophia’s lips before she realized it.
“Why?” Emma pressed. “What aren’t you telling me?”
Sophia had never said a word about her experiences to anyone. She hated the idea of pity more than anything else.
“Soph… if you don’t want to tell me, it’s okay… but maybe it would be nice to get it off your chest.”
Emma made a good point. It would be nice to have someone in her corner.
She leaned over and rested her face in her hands. “It’s not in the cards, Emma. Guys just don’t stick around.”
“Guys… or one guy specifically?”
Sophia grimaced. “Fine. One guy. He… apparently, I wasn’t enough for him.
He was my first really serious boyfriend, and instead of breaking up with me, he went behind my back and dated other girls.
” She could feel the pity coming from Emma, and she hated it.
Her hands clenched as she lifted her gaze to her friend. “Don’t feel bad for me.”
Emma frowned. “I can feel bad for you because that’s not something anyone should experience.”
“Well, don’t pity me.”
“It’s not pity, Soph. It’s love.”
Sophia shook her head and got to her feet. “He was always a big flirt. I think it was something that brought us together. The banter we had with each other was next level. I just never thought that he’d use his prowess to chase after someone else when we were still dating.”
“I’m so sorry, Sophia.”
“Yeah, well, that’s life. And it happened long enough ago that it shouldn’t matter.”
Emma’s hand reached out and took Sophia’s hand in hers. “It will always matter. It just won’t always hurt.”
Sophia lifted her eyes toward her friend, fighting the tears that threatened to escape.
“But don’t forget that Cameron isn’t that guy.”
“I know he isn’t,” Sophia muttered.
“Then don’t treat him like he is. Cameron is trying to?—”
“He’s a lot like him, though. The way he flirts with me and pushes my buttons… sometimes it’s all I can see.”
Emma’s frown deepened. “I’d be a hypocrite if I told you that you need to get over it. We all have our triggers.”
“So, you’re not going to tell me to just give in and open my heart to him?”
“As much as I want to? No. But I will ask you something. If there is a chance for happiness with him, don’t you think you owe it to yourself to try?
Would the risk be worth the hurt? Cameron isn’t the same guy as the one who betrayed you, and just because there are parts of him that remind you of that experience doesn’t mean it will end the same.
Maybe it will work. Maybe it won’t. Either way, you won’t know unless you try. ”
Sophia stared at where Emma’s warm hand held her own.
There was comfort in the way they were connected, and she couldn’t deny that Emma had made a good point.
As often as Sophia had told everyone and herself that she wasn’t cut out for something serious, there was still a part of her that wanted it more than she would ever admit to anyone else. “Yeah, maybe.”
“Maybe?” Emma grinned, releasing her.
“Yeah. Maybe.” Sophia moved closer to her friend and pulled her in for a hug. They clung to each other for a few moments before Sophia pulled back. “Thanks.”
“I didn’t do anything.” Emma laughed.
Sophia grinned. “You did more than you realize.”
Sophia couldn’t get Emma’s advice out of her head as she went to work the following day. She was on edge for a completely different reason than before. The small part of her that still wanted to find love was growing.
She didn’t want to end up alone.
And if Cameron was the guy who could make her happy? Then would it be so bad if she opened a door and gave him a chance? That thought was utterly terrifying if she were honest with herself. And yet, there was a small thrill that she’d only felt a handful of times since Brent had broken her heart.
It wasn’t a surprise that Cameron was up and already at work. He was wandering down the barn aisle toward the mares he’d been observing. From where she stood in the doorway, she couldn’t hear the things he was murmuring to them, but it still brought a smile to her face.
He was really good with the horses. She’d seen the way they took to him, trusting him easier than they’d trusted most newcomers. Mateo had done the right thing in hiring him, even if she’d been thrown for a loop by the revelation of it all.
Cameron paused before turning and facing her. The smile he gave her stirred the electricity that she’d grown to associate with being near him. If he had been upset with the way she’d bailed on him the last time they’d been together, he wasn’t showing it.
Shoving her hands into her back pockets, she wandered toward him. “What’s on the schedule today?”
He drew closer to her, meeting her partway. “Now that we know our stud and our mares get along, we have to wait for the girls to go into heat. For now, I’m monitoring their health—their exercise and eating habits.”
She nodded. Ever since he’d shown up, he had taken hold of the reins and dictated what the horses needed, but he didn’t get to decide all of it.
“Tilly needs to go for a ride today. She’s getting antsy,” she said.
“I’m guessing Birdie needs one, too.” Sophia waited for him to argue with her.
But he didn’t. Instead, he glanced over his shoulder toward the horses briefly.
“I think that’s a good idea. Nothing too strenuous. ”
“Of course not,” Sophia said. “I’ll go easy on them.
” She watched him for a moment. Most of what she knew about him was surface level—well, besides the story about his brother.
She could tell he was passionate about his job, and people who could give that much of themselves to one thing had a tendency to spread that passion elsewhere.
The heat in her chest burned hotter and she moved closer to him. “Maybe you’d like to come along for a ride?”
He arched a brow. “Are you asking me on a date, Red?”
She rolled her eyes even as she bit back a smile. “In your dreams. Come if you want or don’t.”
The way he was watching her put her on edge in the most delicious way. She didn’t want to admit that his decision mattered to her, but in all likelihood, he could already see that it did.
“Oh, I’m coming,” Cameron purred. “And maybe you’ll finally tell me something real.”
Her heart stalled for a moment, then she flipped her hair as she brushed past him to head for the saddles. “Maybe.”
The horses plodded along the trail, and Sophia could feel Cameron’s stare each and every time he glanced in her direction. She bit down on her lower lip and looked at him. “You want something real?”
Cameron didn’t say anything, but the look in his eye said he was on the edge of his seat.
“My hair used to be down to my waist. I grew it out as long as I could because I wanted to be a princess.”
His brows lifted. She’d kept it short since she’d found out about Brent’s treachery, so it wasn’t a surprise that he couldn’t envision it.
Sophia tilted her head forward so the short strands could hide some of her face.
This was the first time she’d admitted this out loud.
“After a particularly bad experience, I couldn’t take it anymore.
I didn’t feel like a princess any longer, and I needed a change.
So, I chopped it as short as I could and added some fire.
” She pinched some of the strands of red that she could see out of the corner of her eye.
“My brothers freaked out.” She let out a laugh.
“I’d never done anything rebellious and then just walked in the door one day looking nothing like myself. I changed up my clothing style, too.”
When she looked at him again, she found his mouth hanging open, but when he noticed her stare, he closed it.
“I know,” she murmured. “It’s silly, and I guess I shouldn’t have?—”
In a flash, he urged his horse into a trot that put him in her path, forcing her to pull up short. Her horse whinnied, and she frowned at him. “What’s wrong?”
Cameron stared at her with nothing but understanding in his gaze. He shook his head. “It’s not silly. Our experiences change us—usually on the inside. But sometimes that’s not enough. Yours happened to transform you on the outside, too. Don’t ever second guess the way your heart needed to cope.”
It was almost like he knew exactly what she’d been through, and she wasn’t sure she liked that feeling.
But he couldn’t—not unless he knew Brent personally.
Her ex hadn’t exactly kept his prowess a secret.
Apparently, he’d shared his indiscretions with his friends as if being a cheater made him special.
“Sophia.” Her name on his tongue sounded sweeter than it really should have, and she focused on him.
She almost expected him to ask about her experience, but he didn’t.
“Whatever you’re thinking, stop. Changing your hair isn’t a sign of weakness.
It’s a sign of survival—of strength. You came out of whatever it was on top. Wear it like armor.”
She stared at him with surprise. Now she really thought he might have an inkling of what she’d been through. Would he admit to it? Probably not. Then again, their conversation was so vague that she was likely overthinking all of this.
Sophia nodded her thanks, and Cameron moved out of the way so they could continue their ride.