Chapter 36
Sophie
“Baby, you can’t wear that.” Trooper stood across the room checking me out after I finished dressing. I could tell from the displeased look on his face he wasn’t happy with my choice.
I looked down at my overalls and back at him.
“What’s wrong with what I have on?”
He smirked as his eyes moved across my body. “You’re about to go into a building filled with men who haven’t seen, touched, smelled, or tasted a woman in years. You can’t be having all your assets on display ’cause I’m not trying to get a cell next to Story.”
Again. I looked down at my clothes. I had on a racerback T-shirt with a linen overall jumper. It wasn’t tight at all.
Sensing my confusion, Trooper walked over to me and stopped just in front of where I stood. My breasts were small. Plenty of times I wore shirts with no bra, and the way my tank top was cut in the back the straps were visible, so I chose not to. Apparently, he wasn’t trying to hear that.
“First of all, you don’t have on a bra. If I notice that you don’t, they damn sure will.
You can’t go in there like that. And this is tight as hell.
” He pinched the side of my tank top. “Also, take off all that extra shit. You can’t go in there with that on anyway. ” He pointed to my bangles and watch.
“Trooper!”
“Trooper, hell. Just change your shirt, Sophie, and put on a bra.”
I laughed and shook my head as I walked back into the closet. The look on his face was priceless because he was beyond serious. It was cute that he was overprotective.
After slipping on a bra and fitted pocket tee, which he approved of, we were ready to leave. I was nervous as hell. Today I would meet my father for the first time.
I had no idea how it would go, but I needed to at least talk to him. Maybe I’d hate him, maybe he’d hate me, but I just needed to fill that void.
The entire thing made me feel like a little kid. Even though I was an adult, I felt like I was trying to find my way and Story was part of that puzzle. There were no guarantees it would fix any of the things broken in my life, but it was necessary.
The forty-five minute drive was quiet for me. I listened to Trooper make calls to various people about his businesses while I was stuck in my thoughts about what I would say to my father. The closer we got, the more nervous I got. As much as I pretended it wasn’t a big deal, it was.
“Take your ID out and put it in your pocket. Leave everything else in the car. Take all your jewelry off, even those earrings.”
After we parked, Trooper rattled off instructions robotically and began removing items from his pocket.
I sat there at first, but then began doing the same.
“You sure you want to do this?” he asked after he placed his gun in the glove compartment of his truck.
“Yes, why?” I dropped my cellphone into my purse before I lifted my wallet to retrieve my license.
Trooper smirked and leaned over the seat, kissing my cheek. “Because you look scared as fuck, Sophie. You’re safe. They can’t touch you and I’d beat their asses if they tried.”
His smile dropped and his expression turned serious.
“I know. I’m with you, so I’m not worried about that.”
He chuckled and opened his door. “Yes you are, but I know this is not the life you’re used to. If you weren’t nervous, I would be, because there’s no way you should be comfortable with a situation like this.”
The process took forever and the people who handled us weren’t very accommodating, as if we were criminals just for visiting someone. This wasn’t a place I wanted to visit often. Trooper was right about this not being my life.
Trooper and I sat at a table in the corner of the visitation room, waiting.
The second my father entered the room, I knew it was him.
Not because I recognized him, but from the way he looked at me.
I smiled nervously as he approached and Trooper stood to greet him.
When the two were close enough, they shared a hug before Story stepped back and looked at me.
He smiled and sat down, but kept his eyes locked on mine.
“You look just like her,” was the first thing he said, placing his hands on the table in front of him. He broke eye contact with me for a brief moment and glanced at Trooper, then looked right at me again.
“I don’t think so,” I said, tucking my hair behind my ear.
He smiled. “You do. You have her eyes, her nose, even her smile. I haven’t seen her face in years, but I remember every inch. It’s a good thing you took after her and not me.” He laughed to himself.
“I’ll give you guys a minute to talk.” Trooper stood and kissed me on the cheek before my father nodded at him to agree.
“You’re beautiful, Sophie. I knew you would be though,” he said after we were alone.
“Thank you.”
I searched his face and noticed how handsome he was. I understood why my mother fell in love with him. His hair was cut low with flecks of gray and his face held strong features. A square jawline covered with a neatly trimmed beard.
His small eyes reminded me of mine, just like his caramel complexion. William was dark, while my complexion matched my mother’s. I never really questioned that because of hers, but now seeing my father, I was the perfect blend of both.
“Ask,” he said, intertwining his fingers as he watched me.
“Ask what?” I questioned, not really knowing what he meant or where to start.
“Anything you want. I’m sure you have questions and I owe you answers.”
I turned my head slightly to see Trooper and he was looking right at me with concern in his face, which I knew came from him being uneasy about me being here.
“Why didn’t you fight for me?”
“Because I couldn’t win. Fighting meant hurting your mother and you. I wasn’t going to do that. If your mother had given up, there was no point. It would have only complicated things and I still would have ended up here.”
“Did you love her?”
“Did and still do. Your mother did what she thought was best. She tried to protect me, but she was fighting a battle she wasn’t skilled to compete in. After her father was killed, she was alone. I don’t blame her for the choices she made, so don’t be mad at her because I’m not.”
“She said William’s family killed my grandfather. Did you know that?”
My father glanced at Trooper before he looked at me again. “I knew, but didn’t have proof.”
“Why are you here? What did William do?”
“It’s not important.”
“It is to me. Maybe there’s a way to—”
“Sophie, no. Don’t worry about that. I’m not innocent.
I’ve done a lot of bad things in my life.
I made peace with that. Maybe I never would have ended up here if he hadn’t called in favors to make it happen, but maybe I would have.
No one knows, but I can’t live like that, worrying about things I can’t change.
I’m here and there isn’t anything I can do about that.
One thing I’m grateful for is you. You’re absolutely beautiful, and from what Trooper tells me, you’re smart and successful.
I regret a lot of things, but seeing you now…
” He paused and smiled. “If me not being there allowed you to become who you are, I can live with that.”
I sat there for a minute with a million questions. I wanted to know so much but couldn’t focus on just one thing. My mind was all over the place. The more I thought about it, the more I hated William.
“Do you love him?” My father’s voice snatched me out of my head and I looked at him in confusion, so he clarified. “Trooper, do you love him?”
I had never admitted it before, not even to myself, but when my father asked, I said it with ease.
“Yes.” I couldn’t contain the smile that accompanied my answer.
“He’s complicated. Always has been. Life damaged him, but he loves you too, Sophie. Be patient with him. He has a good heart, he just doesn’t know how to let go enough to let people in, but looks like you’ve changed that.”
I nodded and we both glanced at Trooper, who frowned, and my father chuckled.
“So I hear I’m going to be a grandfather.”
“Looks that way.” I wasn’t sure if Trooper had told him.
“I don’t really get to be the overprotective father and give him a hard time.”
“You can, I don’t mind.”
Again, we both looked at Trooper who stood this time and joined us.
“Looks like I need to be over here to see what y’all are talking ’bout, especially since you keep looking at me with that goofy ass grin.” He kissed my cheek and my father laughed.
“I told her I’m going to give you a hard time about getting her pregnant.”
Trooper laughed and shook his head. The three of us spent the next few hours catching up. I saw a different side of Trooper. The way he interacted with my father helped me see parts of him that he had yet to even expose to me.
The bond they shared was touching. It made me a little jealous because Trooper had something with my father I didn’t have. It wasn’t his fault, so I tried not to let it get to me, but it was clear the two were close and cared for each other.
Seeing it made me want that with my father. In just a few hours of being around him, I missed the life I wasn’t allowed to have with the man who’d helped create me.
“I’m glad you came.” My father smiled admirably at me as we stood to say our goodbyes. “This is no place for someone like you and I don’t want you to come back, but I’m glad you came.”
“It’s no place for you either.”
He chuckled and stepped around the table to hug me. He held on longer than he should have but no one bothered to speak on it. Throughout the day, plenty of people had been threatened about contact, but when my father hugged me, it was as if no one bothered to acknowledge.
“Maybe not, but I have to be here. You don’t. You can call or write, but I don’t want you to come back here.” My father’s eyes left me and went to Trooper.
He wanted Trooper to agree to make sure I wouldn’t be back. I saw him nod as the two silently communicated.
I had no plans of adhering to that, but I would have that conversation with Trooper when we left. I had so much lost time and didn’t care my father didn’t want me to come there and see him. It wasn’t his choice.
“What do you want to eat?” Trooper asked as soon as we entered the city again. I hadn’t even realized we'd spent all day there, and all I had was the banana and yogurt I ate before we left the house that morning. It was almost five.
“You choose.”
“You okay?” Trooper asked, again searching my expression like my answer would be different from the three other times he’d asked since we left from visiting my father.
“I will be if you stop asking me that.” I grinned and he returned a smile.
“I’m just asking because you’re quiet.”
“Today was a good day. Thank you for that, and I’m fine, so stop asking me.”
“Long as you’re good.”
“You’re different when you’re with him.”
Trooper shot me a curious look. “Different how?”
“I don’t know, more relaxed and open. Just different.”
Trooper chuckled as he pulled into a parking space along the curb across from the restaurant where I assumed we would eat.
“I’m always the same.”
“You’re really not, though,” I said after Trooper helped me out of the truck and shut the door. “He’s more your father than mine.”
Trooper stopped before we started toward the restaurant. “Does that bother you?” I could tell he knew the answer even before he asked, but still waited for me to answer.
“A little, but not like you think. It just makes me a little sad.”
“Don’t be. He loved you even when he was away from you.” Trooper kissed my forehead and took my hand to lead us inside.
After we were seated, I excused myself to go to the bathroom. My happy day took a drastic turn when I entered and found Orin leaning over the sink toward the mirror, freshening her makeup.
She saw me through the mirror and a smirk filled her face as she strutted my way, like she owned the world.
“It’s been a while,” she said dryly as she looked me over.
I rolled my eyes and started toward the stall, but she kept talking. “How is he? Bored, I’m sure. You don’t know him like I do.”
That annoyed me and I stopped to face her. “Oh, I know him and he knows me.” I purposely placed my hand over my stomach, which caught her attention. She frowned as her eyes followed my motion.
“You might call it bored, I call it settling into his new life. He’s happy. Trust me, now if you’ll excuse me, this baby is really doing a number on my bladder.”
Her eyes grew wide and her mouth opened slightly, but she didn’t say a word.
I left her standing there and entered the stall with a pleased grin on my face as I shut the large oak door.
Maybe I shouldn’t have stooped to her level, but sometimes people had to be shown how irrelevant they really were.
I heard heels clicking against the tile floor then the bathroom was quiet again. I was alone. I was sure this wouldn’t be the last of her, especially after the bomb I just dropped, but I really didn’t care. Trooper was mine, and that wasn’t changing.