Chapter 26
TWENTY-SIX
The silk robe is draped over my shoulders, the coldness from the open window seeping into my body. I take a big drag of the cigarette, sitting on the comfortable armchair, with a tank top and shorts under the robe, and a soft blanket thrown over my bottom body.
The moon’s high up in the sky, and there’s not a single dark cloud in sight. The nicotine fills my lungs, and it helps me relax. I swirl the wine in the glass before taking a big sip.
It’s just past four in the morning, and the girls are asleep either in my bedroom or Avalon’s. I’m all alone in the living room, sipping on my wine, smoking, and waiting.
Mom called for our family’s doctor to look at my knuckles the moment we returned to the manor.
I don’t even want to remember my parents’ reprimanding.
Of course, they found out about what went down and why, and we’ll be having a family meeting tomorrow to discuss it.
The look of disappointment on their faces told me everything I needed to know, though.
My knuckles will be fine. The doctor cleaned them and wrapped them up. They ache, but the pain is on the dull side, so I’m not too worried. I am, however, worried about scarring. It better not fucking scar.
The door of the living room opens softly, and with nothing but a lamp in the corner of the room to give the space some lighting. Slowly, I turn around, taking another drag of the cigarette.
Sawyer stands on the threshold, his hair and shirt disheveled. He looks like he aged ten years in a span of a single night, and he looks right at me, with tired eyes, and a smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes.
The smile, however, falls from his face when he sees the look on mine, and the bandaged knuckles.
“Sophia…”
Sawyer steps forward, and as I raise the glass to my lips, he halts. He doesn’t move an inch, and I don’t know whether to break the glass on his head or scream at him.
“Leave.”
“No,” he steps forward. “We need to talk.”
I tilt my head to the side. “About what, exactly?”
“She’s in the hospital, Sophia. Her nose is broken, and you knocked a tooth out.”
“Did I ask?”
“If I hadn’t pulled you off her, how far would you have gone?”
“Why do you care, Sawyer?” I lean in a little, resting my elbows on my knees. “Why exactly are you so worried about Ms. Ford, hm?”
“I’m worried about you.”
“Don’t lie to me, Sawyer. I saw the way you were looking at her. How long have you been with her?”
Sawyer’s entire body goes rigid, and his face drops. He sits on the sofa across from me, burying his face in his hands, then runs them through his hair.
“A year.”
“A year,” I repeat. No matter how much I try to keep my voice cool, the note of disbelief sneaks in. “You’ve been with her for a whole year?”
“Yes, but—”
I cut him off with a deep, bitter laugh. I take the last drag of the cigarette, before putting it out in the glass ashtray and gulping down the rest of my wine.
“There’s no buts here, Sawyer. You didn’t even check if I was okay. You didn’t even ask why I did what I did. You ran straight toward her. Does she matter so much more than me?”
“You’re the one to talk,” he grits out. “I saw the image before it got deleted.”
“Yes, and if you include that little elevator mishap, I’ve slept with Soren a handful of times. I am not in a full-blown secret relationship with him.”
“Sophia…” he tries, looking at me with pleading eyes. “You shouldn’t have done that.”
“You’re right,” I agree with a chuckle. “I should’ve done worse, and I would’ve done worse had it not been for your interruption.”
“When did you become so… bitter, and malicious?”
“I’ve always been like that, Sawyer. I didn’t have a traumatic experience that forced me to change; I didn’t wake up one day and suddenly decide to be like this.
I’ve always been a callous bitch. You just chose to ignore it until it started affecting you — or rather, your girlfriend.
So, tell me, which one’s worse? Me being a malicious bitch, or you turning a blind eye to it? ”
“I don’t even recognize you anymore.”
A beat of silence passes between us. I’m hurting on the inside because I know that the question I’m about to ask will change the trajectory of our entire relationship.
“What are you going to do, Sawyer?”
“What?”
“Are you going to break up with her?”
“I can’t, Soph,” he whispers. “I love her.”
A knot forms in my throat, and it’s suffocating. Those three little words shatter the relationship between Sawyer and me completely, and it’s pretty clear where his priorities lie.
“Then you’re dead to me.”
His eyes widen in shock, his mouth parting a little. “What? You can’t be serious, Soph.”
“See,” I chuckle, but it’s a bitter sound, filled with pain.
“If my significant other did to you what Astrid did to me, I’d break up with them.
Hell, I’d divorce a husband over it because you’re my brother, Sawyer.
There’s no one I love more than you in this world.
And if someone hates you, they can’t love me in the way I need to be loved, because it means they won’t accept that part of me. ”
“You did the same thing to Soren, Sophia. You’re being a hypocrite.”
I lift a brow. “Am I? I don’t run Sinners and Saints, Sawyer. Astrid, and God knows who else does. I sent in Soren’s sex tape, and his own sister chose to release it. So, tell me, how exactly are those two situations similar?”
He falls silent. He knows I’m right, but his pride is too big to let him admit to it. Instead, he runs his hand over his face, his shoulders slumping.
“Don’t make me choose between you two.”
“I’m not,” I swallow thickly. “You already made a choice. It’s just that it isn’t me.
And for the record, I’ve had a few hours to think about this entire situation, you know…
” I pause, and he lifts his head to look at me.
“I promised Astrid I’d make her life a living hell.
It was mainly said in anger, but now? Oh, Sawyer, I’ll fucking ruin her just to spite you.
I’ll fuck her up so badly she’ll start to resent you.
And in a few months’ time, maybe even years, you’ll come to realize she was never worth it. ”
His jaw clenches, anger flashing in his eyes. “Sophia—”
“Get the fuck out of my sight, Sawyer. You just lost your only sibling. Hope you don’t come crawling back, you fucking bastard.”
◆◆◆
The morning is tense.
Avalon, Grace, and Lila left earlier this morning. Their belongings are still upstairs, and they just knew that I’d be having a family meeting, hence they ran off before they could get caught in the crossfire. It’s not going to be pretty.
Even Elliot isn’t present. Mom sent him to run a few errands, and I don’t think he’ll be back before noon, which means I’m fucking doomed.
The dining table is deadly silent. It’s suffocating, and I can’t eat. I’m playing with the food on my plate, pushing it around with my fork, and taking the smallest bites, just so I don’t draw attention to myself.
Mom’s sitting across from me, not even looking at me. She’s not the one to keep silent, and it’s killing me on the inside. However, it’s far worse that Dad hasn’t uttered a word since we sat down to eat.
Mom’s always been the strict, stern parent. Although Dad didn’t let us just run around and wreak havoc, he was always the one to sit us down, have a conversation until we realized where we went wrong and why, and Mom would ground us as punishment.
Seeing my father with such a look of disappointment in his eyes is shattering me on the inside.
“We have to address the elephant in the room,” Mom says, putting her fork down on her plate softly. She looks at me, and more than anything, she seems tired. “What in the world were you thinking, Sophia?”
I bite the inside of my cheek, looking down in shame. They’re both aware of what led me to beat up Astrid, and I know for a fact that Mom’s referring to the elevator scene with Soren, rather than the fact that I put Astrid in the hospital.
“I’m sorry.”
Dad slams his glass against the table, and I flinch a little, looking up at him with tears in my eyes.
“Tears won’t work. Not this time, Sophia. What in the world were you thinking, getting involved with the Ford boy? After everything you two have done to each other?”
I keep silent. There are no words that I can say, nothing to justify my actions. Sawyer is sitting next to Dad, and he isn’t saying much. He knows that one wrong word from his mouth, and I’m throwing him under the bus immediately.
“Is the image deleted?”
I nod immediately, wiping the tears from my eyes. “Yes. I had Aria help me.”
“You asked for help from a criminal?” Mom hisses under her breath, then starts rubbing her temples, eyes closing. “You’ll send me into an early grave, child.”
“But she did make sure it’s deleted. She sent me a follow-up message this morning. It’s gone. Whoever saw it can’t prove it. It’s been deleted from the security camera footage, too.”
Dad sighs in relief. “Good. That’s good. But, Sophia, just how involved are you with the Ford boy?”
“It was just… casual. It’s nothing serious.”
“Good. You’d better end it immediately. Do you understand me?”
“Yes.”
He looks at me with narrowed eyes, trying to find any trace of dishonesty. When he doesn’t find any, he nods in return, sighing deeply. The disappointment lingers in his eyes, and it’s like a knife to my chest.
“I’m disappointed in you, Sophia,” he says, and tears swell in my eyes. “It will take a long time for me to forgive you for this.”
“You’ll forgive her?” Sawyer chimes in, blinking in confusion. “Wouldn’t the next step be to take her out of your will, and give me all the business?”
Dad lifts a brow. “Now, that’s a bit extreme, don’t you think?”
“Yes,” I clear my throat. “Especially since what Soren and I did was very, very casual, with no romantic feelings involved.” I turn to Sawyer, and he pales. “Tell our parents who you’ve been dating for a year, Sawyer.”
“You’ve been in a relationship for a year and didn’t bother to even let us know?” Mom’s mouth falls open. “Why?”
Sawyer and I are engaged in a heated staring contest. His eyes are pleading with me not to say a word, but the moment the memories of last night resurface, the anger inside of me wins. I turn to our parents, then push the chair away.
“Your son has been dating Astrid Ford, and he says he loves her. Have a great day.” With that, I leave the dining room.
All I can hear as I’m leaving is Mom and Dad shouting, and Sawyer trying to defend himself.
No matter how much it hurts me that my relationship with my brother has ended on such a note, I can’t help the flutter of satisfaction that floods through my veins.
Two can play this game, Sawyer. I just happen to be a better player than you’ll ever be.