Chapter Sixty-Four
Sky
I ’m learning that spring is a timid thing at Hillcrest. It peeks in midday, but then scurries away as the sun dips. And in the mornings, it’s completely absent, probably sleeping in like I wish I could.
I yawn as I zip my skirt up, already running late.
I didn’t sleep well at all. I had nightmares that kept waking me. And even though I can’t remember them, they were bad enough to have me up and out of the bed several times, afraid to fall back asleep. The unease they buried in me is still clinging around my chest, and I pull on Cade’s hoodie for comfort.
I’m practically moving with my eyes closed—the only thing propelling me forward is that Cade is waiting for me. Ruby has already gone to breakfast—no patience for waiting and not a fan of walking with us. And I don’t blame her. After being apart all night, Cade and I almost melt together in the mornings. It’s an ooey gooey thing that I could actually really use right now.
Sure enough, the dread in my chest starts to subside as I pick my way down the rattling stairs, getting closer to him. I nearly skip out the doors, eager to curl against his chest and sink into his heartbeat. Maybe later we can take a nap in the library, a place where I can actually fall asleep in his arms, and catch up on the sleep I missed. I’m already looking forward to it, a smile breaking out on my lips as I look up.
Cade’s tree is getting back its leaves, fresh greenery shimmering in the honeyed sun, but instead of being happy about a sign of spring, my lips fall.
Because Cade isn’t standing in front of it.
I blink and look around. There’s some stragglers on the quad, but none are my black clad demon. He’s always here. Rain or snow, he’s always waiting for me. Always. Immediately, something doesn’t feel right, and I stick my hands in the pocket of the hoodie, my brows coming together.
I inch towards the tree, as if getting closer will suddenly make him appear, and chew my lip when he doesn’t. Is he just running late? But I’m already running late. We probably only have five more minutes left to get bagels before class, and he should be here by now.
Maybe he went to get them. Maybe he thought we weren’t going to have enough time. But even as I think it, I don’t believe it. He wouldn’t let me walk to class by myself. I’m perfectly capable, but I know he likes to glare at everyone that looks at me.
My stomach knots irrationally as I stand like a girl who’s been stood up, alone under a tree, looking around hopefully. I stay until the quad empties and the cathedral bell chimes. I even stay five minutes past, the repercussions of tardiness paling in comparison to my missing demon. It’s only when panic starts to creep in that I hurry to class, trying to convince myself that he’ll be there. My heart thumps as I pull open the door, my breaths short but rapid. I’m expectant, searching for him without regard for the eyes that gawk at the late-comer.
But Cade isn’t amongst them.
I hesitate in the doorway, thinking I should check the shack, thinking that something horrible must have happened. That stupid picture of a bomb flashing in my mind.
“Take a seat,” Mrs. Fawn says, and I realize she’s scowling, waiting on me.
But I don’t want to take a seat. I want Cade— need him, actually. My chest isn’t going to relax until I see him, until I know that he’s alright.
“Before I write you up Ms. Lyons.” Mrs. Fawn all but taps her foot.
A heat singes my cheeks. Shit. I can’t have a write-up. Not when my father’s been blissfully silent. But something is wrong. I can feel it. Hysteria climbs up my throat even though I know I’m not being reasonable. There’s so many things that could keep him out for the day. He’s sick. He’s late. He’s with his mother. They are all valid, but none squash the tightening in my throat.
I waver, not sure if I care about getting written up right now. But what if I am being stupid? What if he’s fine and I bring forth the wrath of my father for nothing?
“Now,” Mrs. Fawn barks, causing me to jump.
Damn it. With a stifled whine, I quickly find my seat and try to think logically. He’s sick. He’s late. He’s fine. I repeat the list in my head, keeping my eyes on the door. Hopefully he’ll come in late, any second now.
But by the time lunch comes around and I enter the dining hall, I’m on the verge of tears. I’m not the least bit hungry, but part of me thinks he could be here, picking up a bag of rolls. I know it doesn’t make sense, but today doesn’t make sense at all.
I’m like a lost child without Cade, as if I’m tethered to nothing. It’s not healthy, silly even, when it’s not like we spend every waking second together. But today feels wrong, and healthy or not, I’m scared. It’s like a cord has been severed between us, and I can no longer feel him.
After I make sure he isn’t getting food, I slip between students in a haste, desperate to see if he’s sitting at our table. But all I find are Ruby and Callie.
“Have you seen Cade today?” I don’t bother sitting.
They both look up at me, but I flinch when I see Callie’s eyes. They are rimmed red and puffy.
“No,” she croaks.
“I try not to see Cade,” Ruby says.
I can’t even muster an eye roll, and I ignore her to tilt my head at Callie.
“What’s wrong?” I crowd in next to her, momentarily putting aside my worry for Cade. “What happened?”
She sniffles but doesn’t say anything, leaving room for Ruby to sigh. A silence stretches where I look between the two of them, waiting for someone to speak.
“Bobby broke up with her,” Ruby finally says.
“ What?! ” my voice is more shrill than it needs to be, but that doesn’t make sense at all.
“Yep.” Ruby nods. “With a note, no less. What a pussy.”
I shake my head. That doesn’t… It just doesn’t make sense. Anyone with half a brain could see how much Bobby is into Callie. They were definitely going to go all the way. High school sweethearts, marriage, kids, and a dog. There’s no way he would break up with her.
“And tell her why.” Ruby nudges Callie.
“The note said he had to go home.” Callie’s voice cracks. “That he had a family death and—”
“No,” Ruby cuts her off. “Tell her what you guys did.”
Callie’s cheeks turn pink, and she hangs her head. “That’s not why,” she mutters.
“What’s not why?” I want to be considerate, but my patience is gone, along with Cade’s presence.
Ruby gives Callie a cursory second to speak up, but then folds her arms and answers for her.
“They had sex.”
“That’s not why he left,” Callie snaps.
Ruby quirks a brow at me, like I’m in on this witnessing of denial.
“You don’t think it’s a bit odd that you finally give it up and he vanishes?”
“He’s not like that.”
“He sure sounded like a dick in that note.”
I shake my head again and peer around the dining hall, trying to find a clear thought in my mind while they bicker. I don’t think for a second that Bobby would ‘hit it and quit it’ as I faintly hear Ruby reference. Callie is right. He’s not like that. This is sweet and innocent Bobby we are talking about here. I don’t think he ‘hit’ anything. The two of them probably fumbled around awkwardly, blushing and shy.
He probably really does have a family emergency. Why he would break up with her, though, doesn’t make sense. Surely, he’ll be back to finish out the year. Maybe Callie jumped to conclusions when reading the note. Maybe he didn’t actually break up with her. That would make more sense.
“Do you have the note?” I interrupt the two of them.
“It’s in my room.” Callie swipes at her cheek.
I frown. I want to read it. To make sense of it and calm Callie. But I don’t want to drag us back to Lamb Hall right now. I still have to find Cade.
“I’m sure it’s just a misunderstanding,” I say, and then hastily add, “Don’t listen to Ruby.” I start to extract myself apologetically, hoping I have enough time to make it to the shack and back.
Ruby scoffs, but I’m already turning. One problem at a time , I tell myself.