Chapter 10
Caiden
We weren’t very thorough when we cleaned up the house and moved on. Though if people couldn’t see me, it made me wonder how much of a mess I could really leave behind.
I’d feel bad about it later. For now, I was too focused on the way the man beside me seemed unwilling to move more than a few feet away from me at any given time.
Even though things had changed between the two of us—at least, I was pretty sure they had—our situation was still the same. We needed to figure out a way to let Soul change back into his real form… and we needed to figure out what we were supposed to do about me.
That question seemed to be getting more and more complicated with every second that passed.
It wasn’t like I wanted my life back, though a part of me would have loved to be able to see Cole again, to be with him…
but I knew that wasn’t possible. As much as I wanted it, I knew my time here as a living, breathing person was over.
But…
I didn’t want to go back to the Lake. I didn’t want…
I didn’t want to leave Soul.
“Where are we going now?” I asked as we closed the door of the house behind us as best we could after the way Soul had broken it. He threw me a quick glance and linked our fingers together before shrugging.
“I don’t know. I’ve barely met any of the creatures in this world that weren’t at the end of my teeth. I don’t really have any friends to call on.” His expression was a little miserable as he said it.
“We’ll figure something out. Don’t worry.” Maybe the confidence wasn’t exactly earned, but I was going to give it anyway. It was natural to fall back into the role of making promises for the future, even if I wasn’t sure I’d be able to be there to see them fulfilled. But it would be all right.
Even if I couldn’t figure things out for myself, I was determined to make sure Soul could go back to the life he’d lived before we met.
The thought of that made something in my chest constrict, made my stomach ache…
but we still kept moving forward in our aimless direction, feeding each other bits and pieces of our lives through softly murmured conversation.
We’d gotten the learn about each other and fuck each other stage backward, but that was okay. I just… I wanted to know him.
It was the middle of the day when Soul finally paused. We were close to the graveyard again, close enough that if I looked, I would probably notice some of the flowers I’d left behind.
“Why are we here?” He’d been pretty determined to stay away from this area, hadn’t he?
“We aren’t here. I am here. You…” He backed me up until we were in an alley by the funeral home connected to the gates.
“You are going to stay right here. I want to see if my collar is where I left it. It’s the only way I can think to tell if my brothers have started looking for me.
And maybe I’ll run into the caretaker… though I doubt he’ll help.
” Soul wrinkled his nose at the prospect, though I had no idea why he was reacting that way.
I did know the thought of him going somewhere without me was enough to make me nervous.
“Are you sure it’s a good idea for us to split up?”
His dark brows came together. “Of course it isn’t.
The thought of being away from you makes me feel…
uneasy.” Soul seemed confused at the shape of the word on his tongue.
“But it’s the only way I can tell if you’re in danger.
If it’s gone, we might need to leave the city.
If it’s still here, maybe we have time… I don’t know…
” He blinked at me, the gray of his eyes pleading.
“I just want to do something to keep you safe.”
He sounded so desperate, and I realized he needed this. He needed to feel like he was taking some kind of action. I didn’t like the thought of him out of my sight, but I wasn’t going to make it harder on him by saying it.
“Okay. I’ll stay right here. Maybe a little further back so no one can see me, but… Soul?” I had to swallow the sound of worry trying to trip me up when I spoke. “Be careful. And quick… please?”
He nodded, then dipped his head and ran his tongue along the curve of my cheek. “I’ll be back before you know I’m gone… and you…” He shoved my shoulder gently so I hit the brick behind me. “Stay.”
“You’re the one who’s supposed to listen to commands,” I muttered beneath my breath as he loped off toward the trees where he’d found me.
I stayed pressed to the wall until he was out of sight and then blew out a breath.
It was strange, the way that near helplessness, the listless feeling I’d had before he found me immediately welled up in my chest the instant I couldn’t see him anymore.
It was that feeling more than anything that made me duck into the shadows of the alley. I didn’t want him to see my expression if the way I was feeling showed when he came back…
I just hadn’t realized I’d been holding in so many emotions until I had a chance to breathe around them.
A chance to think.
A chance to realize that wanting something—hoping and wishing to keep it—was almost as terrifying as knowing I couldn’t have anything at all.
“Oh, fuck.” My shoulders hit the building’s wall again, and I closed my eyes, bringing one hand up to press my palm over my closed lids. “Fuck… fuck.” I didn’t know what to do.
I didn’t know how to feel. I’d never done this before. I’d never even thought about doing this.
Impossibly, it made me wish—ache—for my brother. Maybe I’d always been the strong one when it came to putting on a brave face, but Cole had always been the person who knew how to handle things like this. Big emotions, impossible situations.
I missed my twin.
“I’ve never felt longing quite like yours before.
You aren’t human, are you?” A deep voice to my left pulled me out of my misery.
The man standing there—again, I was pretty sure it wasn’t a man at all—had crimson eyes and long, dark hair pulled into a loose tail.
His tan skin was covered in tattoos, and the wicked tilt of his lips revealed pointed teeth.
“I’ve never tasted wishes straight from the source before…
but that’s what you are, aren’t you?” He stepped closer while I stayed frozen. “A little lost soul.”
I wasn’t… I wasn’t lost. Not anymore. I had Soul. Last night was the first time in a long time that I’d felt like I was exactly where I belonged, and…
Soul wasn’t here right now, so that wasn’t going to do me a damn bit of good.
“Who are you?” It came out weakly.
“Corvin. But I know you’re probably more curious about what I am.” He only stopped when he was close enough that I could see his nails were tipped in claws the same as Soul’s. “I’m everything you’ve been longing for. I can give you exactly what you desire.”
It sounded like he really meant the promise, but I could taste the poison on the edge of his words. I shook my head quickly. “I don’t think so.”
“No? How long have you been wandering, hm? Not long enough to meet another shapeshifter, a shadow like myself? I’m a wish granter, little spirit.
” He leaned in closer, that smirk going broad enough that I could see that yes…
his teeth were definitely sharp. “All I want in return is a little taste of your dreams.”
Oh shit. Absolutely not. When I’d told Soul we’d find a solution, I hadn’t expected one to be offered in the form of a man who looked like the fucking devil and made promises like him too.
“I don’t think so. I’ll… pass. Uh… Thanks for the offer?” I tried a polite smile, though I had a feeling that wasn’t going to do me a damn bit of good.
His head tilted at my pathetic attempt to brush him off.
When he leaned in and inhaled again, my hands started to shake.
It felt like he was looking at me naked, like he could see me from the inside out.
And his words seemed to confirm just that.
“You’re a strange little thing, aren’t you?
All your hopes and dreams, every wish you’ve ever made…
” That crimson gaze narrowed. “Has any of it ever been for yourself?”
My eyes widened. I didn’t think the words of a complete stranger could strike me in the center of my chest, especially when I’d known they were true well before he spoke them.
Still, knowing my entire life had revolved around making sure that other people were okay and having it so blatantly thrown into my face were two different things.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Even to me, the protest came out faint, a little weak. I felt more wounded from his words than I had from anything that had happened since I’d crawled from the Lake.
“I know exactly what I’m talking about. I can smell it on you…
nothing you’ve ever done has been for yourself.
But now…” Corvin tilted his head again, looking me over curiously.
“Now there’s something you want, isn’t there?
Deep desire… it would probably taste so sweet.
” I didn’t move as he stepped closer, only craned my neck up to watch him cautiously.
Something told me running would be dangerous.
Something told me that I needed to wait.
“I can’t help you.” I said the words as clearly as I could.
“But I can promise if you don’t get out of here, you’re going to regret it.
” It wasn’t even a threat, and I hoped he realized it.
It was a warning he seemed all too happy to ignore as he stepped closer, putting one hand above my head, palm flat on the brick.
“But I could help you, if you let me. I could give you what you want. What you crave.” His voice was nearly hypnotic, those red eyes a soft swirl I could fall into…
But it wasn’t his eyes I needed. No, I needed a sweet, gray expression. “No, thank you. Maybe you should focus more on yourself.” I looked him over as I spoke. “The way you talk about wanting and desire, it sounds like you’re kind of jealous.”
For just a moment, he looked stricken. He tried to bury the expression before I noticed, but it was there.
Naked and raw on his face. I used the opportunity to push away from the wall, ducking under his arm.
I started backing away, wondering if I could make it out of the alley and toward the graveyard to find Soul.
I apparently wasn’t any better at hiding my expressions than he was. “Now, now, little soul. No running.” He stepped forward, reaching for me as he hid his earlier display behind bravado and charm. “I don’t think so. I’ve been drawn to this place for months, and maybe it was to find—”
“I’ll fucking tear your skin off if you touch him.”
The snarl that spilled from behind me felt like it reached straight into my chest, echoed around my ribs. The feel of a strong arm wrapping around my waist and jerking me back knocked the breath from my lungs… but that was okay.
I felt completely safe, because I knew who it was.
Soul shifted me until I stood behind him, and when he drew himself up to his full height, I realized that the sweet puppy of a man I’d been seeing, the warmth and softness…
That was just for me.
This—the danger on his face, the sharp flash of his teeth, the way he looked like he was ready to kill the creature in front of us… this was Soul.
“He didn’t hurt me,” I said, my voice faint. In front of us, Corvin’s crimson eyes widened, like he was shocked that I was trying to defend him from my seemingly feral lover.
“I would have,” he said, a smirk tugging up the corner of his lips. “You would have tasted—”
His words cut off as Soul’s arm swung in an arc. I thought he’d slapped him until I realized the front of the man’s shirt was shredded, and little wisps of black blood were oozing from his chest in three jagged claw marks.
“Soul!” I grabbed his arm as he raised it again. I had no idea why I was trying to stop him from hurting the man—maybe it was that look he’d just given me. The shock, the confusion.
Maybe it was because somewhere beneath all that bravado and danger, that expression told me there was a part of him that wanted kindness. Or maybe I just didn’t want to be the reason Soul killed someone.
Whatever it was, I tugged on his arm, and I was shocked when he let me yank him back.
That didn’t stop him from snarling out a threat.
“If I see you again, if you come anywhere near him… I’ll tear your fucking head from your shoulders and drink your Vitality myself, the balance of the world be damned. Do you understand me, shadow?”
Shadow.
I mean, it made sense that Soul knew what the man in front of me was. Shadow. Wish giver.
Fuck, how many things were there in the world that I’d never known about until now?
“Dramatic dog. I wasn’t going to break your little mate. I was just… curious.” Those red eyes flicked to me for another second before he took a step back. And then another. Before I had a chance to see where he was going, I was moving. Soul’s arms sliding around my waist as he lifted me up.
“Soul, what are you—” But I didn’t get a chance to finish my question. He half ran, half dragged me down the street and away from the sound of that dark, wicked laughter chasing us as we went.