Chapter Twenty-Five #2
Anna Grace balanced the ball in her hands, her head cocked so her hair brushed her shoulders. She did that hip-swinging thing and drew up to the lane. Her arm dropped, the ball swung back, then she yanked it forward and let it go so smooth it barely made a sound on the slick surface of the lane.
“What if I’m not enough for her?” he said.
Mamie patted his knee. “That’s not a question the likes of me can answer for you, sugarplum.”
Anna’s ball connected with the outside edge of the first pin. It shot sideways into the second pin, knocking it down and picking up a spare.
He jumped into the air, fists pumping and hollering. Anna spun around, laughing, arms high. “Yes!”
Jackson met her halfway. He wrapped her in a hug and spun her around. “Beautiful, Anna Grace.”
“I know.” Her big, infectious grin glowed brighter than the score board. “And I can bowl too.”
Sure could.
She’d bowled him right over.
Jackson was quiet on the drive to the hotel. Anna’s exuberance over the night slowly faded.
This meeting-the-family thing had a flavor of commitment to it.
And it tasted more like strawberry shortcake than stewed okra.
Not good.
They checked into the hotel. Jackson insisted, of course, on carrying her bags. But he didn’t claim his momma’d have his hide if he didn’t. The clerk greeted him by name, though the happy twang in her voice dropped when she spotted Anna. Still, she gave him a wink and an upgrade.
Apparently he’d been serious about not staying often at his momma’s house.
Up in the room, he gave her a let’s have a talk look. A heart-in-his-eyes, contemplating-the-L-word kind of look.
Also not good.
She stumbled back a step. “Does an upgrade mean a whirlpool tub? Because I think that’s the only thing I miss about my old life.”
He humored her with a half-grin. “Yep.”
She stopped short of declaring the tub a good reason to love him, and instead swallowed so quick she choked on her own spit. “Great.” She had to get close to him to claim her bag, so she gave him a peck on the cheek and a forced smile. “You’re a peach.”
He ruffled her hair, then flopped back on the bed with the remote and flipped on a commentary on the history of the Alabama-Auburn rivalry. “My life mission is complete.”
Except a week ago he would’ve asked if he could join her in the tub, and tonight he let her go alone.
Maybe he didn’t like baths. Too cramped or slippery or hot or something.
But given what he could do in that little space of his shower—nope, definitely something else.
She almost turned around, asked if he was okay.
But there was that commitment taste again.
So she went in the bathroom and turned on the faucet, but she left the door cracked.
Just in case.
Her heart would hate her when this went sour before his expiration date. But she couldn’t move for a man again.
Start school over. Find a new job. Leave her friends. She knew how many hours he put in at work. The higher he went in rank, the less time he’d be home.
The thought of living that life with Jackson, of hating that life with Jackson, made her lungs choke as if the steamy water from the tap were filling them instead of the tub. Her pulse echoed a long-forgotten plea.
Don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me.
And who was to say that pensive expression he’d been wearing half the night had anything to do with her?
Who was to say he’d changed his mind about commitment?
Who was to say she was worthy of his love?
Or if she was, for how long? They had lust, but did they have anything else?
Would she ever have anything else?
She filled the tub and killed the overhead lights. The glow off the hair dryer light illuminated the room softly. But despite the hot water shooting out the jets, she shivered.
“Anna Grace?” Jackson knocked at the door. “Okay in there?”
Definitely not. Not if the mere sound of his voice stilled her internal earthquake. “Mm-hmm. Pruney goodness.”
“Need help getting your back?”
She needed help with a lot more than her back.
Concern knitted his brows together. Stubble darkened his cheeks. She felt a pull of interest low in her belly.
She was already in toes over tomatoes. Wasn’t as though letting him closer would change anything.
And he was exceptionally talented at helping with her body parts. “I wouldn’t want to take you away from your pre-game coverage.”
He slipped into the room and took a seat on the floor beside the tub. His gaze darted at the foamy water. “Thinking about other coverage right now.”
The dark heat in his eyes made her want things she had no business wanting, and no chance of ever having.
She dropped her head against the cool surface of the tub and ignored that voice in her head warning her to keep her mouth shut. “What are we doing?” she whispered.
His hand brushed her hair. “Whatever comes natural.”
She peeked at him from beneath lowered lashes. His eyes were big and dark in the low light, watching her watch him. “You think it’s that simple?”
His fingers inched lower, brushed her ear, then her neck, and her shivers morphed from fear to anticipation.
“Ain’t much simple in life.” Even in a low volume, his voice rumbled off the walls.
“But you think we are?”
His lips twitched, but it seemed more habitual than intentional. His eyes were too serious to pull off the smile. “Started that way.”
“This isn’t going to end well.”
“You ending it tonight?”
The correct answer was yes. Get out before she got in any deeper. Before she spent more time with his family, before she missed the sound of Radish snoring on the floor beside her, before those secret looks and private touches went from I’m-into-you to the full-blown I-love-you.
Because no doubt that’s where things were headed. No matter how much she liked him, no matter how easy they usually were, he wasn’t in the long-term plan.
His fingers had stopped moving. Like her, he seemed to be holding his breath, waiting for her answer. The jets in the tub bubbled away, the warm water buffering her body from the realities of the world outside. “No,” she finally said.
“Right glad to hear that.” He cupped her nape and brushed a kiss over her jaw. He drew back, inhaled deep and parted his lips to speak, but Anna pulled him in for another kiss before he could spoil the moment.
Whether they had one or a hundred moments left, she intended to savor every last one.
His hand slid beneath the water to caress her breast. Her breathing hitched, her heart thumped, her blood crashed. Her better judgment slipped away, replaced with her body’s instinctive craving.
She traced his ears, enjoying the little shudder that wound its way through his body. That was easy.
She licked his lower lip, thrilling at the soft texture above the sandpaper feel of his chin. That was easy.
She let him tip her lower in the tub, glide his hand down her belly, between her thighs.
His fingers expertly coaxed her into a haze of frenzied arousal while he continued to kiss her jaw, whisper sweet nothings, nip at her shoulders, her lips, making her forget the world outside their bodies existed.
So, so easy.
She whimpered, thrust her hips against his hand until she exploded in a mass of satisfied, overheated cells. And when she could breathe steadily again, she hooked a hand around his neck and held on tight as her wobbly arms would let her. “Is there anything you don’t do well?”
“Probably, but I don’t much care to find out what it is.”
She tugged at his shirt. “Water’s nice and warm if you want to come in.”
He tossed his clothes on top of her neatly folded ones before she had time to process the fact that he’d slipped out of her arms. When he slid into the tub, condom in hand, the water nearly sloshed over the side. When she crawled over to straddle him, it actually did.
“Making a mess there, Anna Grace.”
“I’ll let you clean it up later.”
He chuckled. “That there’s progress.”
“Wanna see a little more?”
He cupped her rear end and pulled her closer. “Always.”
Twenty minutes later, the water was cooling, and Anna was catching her breath and leaning on Jackson’s wet chest. It rose beneath her. She smiled, anticipating another comment on her progress.
Instead, his voice came out quiet and a little rough. “Momma married Russ two months after my daddy died.”
She went completely still. “Oh,” she whispered.
“They were best friends, my daddy and Russ. Played ball together at Auburn, stayed friends even though Daddy was poor and Russ was—well, you saw. Went hunting every fall. I went with ’em once I was old enough.
Craig too. All of us—we were inseparable.
Don’t remember a time Momma didn’t invite them over every holiday, since Craig’s momma died when we were little. ”
The jets had long since quit running. The small room was silent save for Jackson’s voice.
“My daddy was my hero. Taught me everything I know about being a man. If he couldn’t keep his marriage together, if my daddy couldn’t do it—nobody could.
Worked his tail off doing everything he could to make her happy, and it still wasn’t enough. ”
She twisted her head and pressed a kiss over his tattoo. His wet fingers tangled in her half-damp hair. “Taught me to treat her the same,” he said quietly, “but after she married Russ, she wasn’t the same. Not to me. Not when I realized what she’d done.”
“How old were you?” she asked.
“Summer before my senior year,” he said. “I was gonna go to Auburn. Follow in the old man’s shoes, play ball, wear his number, make him proud. Couldn’t much afford it, wasn’t good enough for a scholarship, but I knew I had the brains to get a good job and work it off after.”
A shiver racked his body. Goosebumps pebbled his skin. If she could’ve squeezed him tighter, she would’ve.
“When Momma married Russ, he moved us into that mansion like it was a step up from how we’d been living.
Offered to pay my tuition. Give me a job at the family business.
Take care of things. Like I was following his footsteps instead of my daddy’s, letting him make me into a man instead of me making myself into a man.
I told him to go to hell and applied to Bama. ”
“Pretty extreme,” Anna murmured.
“Best thing I could’ve done. Got my head screwed back on straight, found something bigger than me worth working for. Might not be able to fly the jets, but I can’t imagine working for anyone else. The Force, it’s family.”
A familiar ache pricked at her chest. She knew better than to fall for a uniform.
She did.
But another part of her ached too.
The part that couldn’t help but sympathize with Deb. Had she been right to marry her husband’s best friend two months after his death? That wasn’t Anna’s business.
But choosing happiness, taking a chance at love again, that was something she envied.
She envied that Kaci had found it, she envied that Jules was looking for it with Brad, and she envied that Deb had been brave enough to risk her relationship with her son to go after what she wanted.
“Does she still love him?” she whispered.
Jackson’s hand stilled on her head. His chest rose beneath her once, twice, then once more, his heart beating out a strong, steady rhythm. “Never paid it much attention.”
“It’s not always people’s fault if they get it wrong the first time.” Her voice was so soft in her own ears she wasn’t sure she’d said it out loud.
But when his grip tightened around her, she knew he’d heard. “My daddy was ten times the man your ex is.”
She squeezed him back. “I know. I can tell.”
His fingers went back to toying with her hair, his breath cool against her damp skin. “Not sure I’ve done my duty in showing Louisa.”
Her eyes burned. A full-body shiver racked her to the core. She could feel that L-word creeping through her subconscious, looking for a crack to sneak through, to burst out to the forefront of her mind, out her mouth, out every pore in her skin.
But it couldn’t. She wouldn’t let it. She had to get through tonight, get through tomorrow, and then she had finals and work. Whatever this was tonight, it would fade. They’d go back to being friends who liked to be naked together, nothing more.
“Guess it’s time for me to clean up that mess, huh, Anna Grace?” He reached for a towel, but she stopped him.
“Give her time.” Her teeth chattered. Jackson reached for the towels again.
Anna stopped him once again. “Not money. Not football tickets. Just your time. She’ll see. She’ll see you, and she’ll see him through you.”
Jackson hauled her out of the tub and wrapped a rough white towel around her body. “Got some experience there, Anna Grace?” He rubbed her arms with a second towel.
“When Beth got married and had babies…I just wanted some time.”
He smiled at her with those beautiful eyes, those perfect lips, and she realized it was still what she wanted.
Just a little more time.