Chapter Twenty-Nine
And they made beautiful biscuits together.
—The Temptress of Pecan Lane, by Mae Daniels
Anna spent the rest of the week on administrative leave. Kaci popped in daily. Anna’s mother, bless her heart, flew in midweek.
OSI had told her not to leave town until their investigation was complete. She had no idea how long that would be.
Shirley had been furious, but she’d swung by as well. “We should’ve been the ones to report this,” she said Thursday afternoon at Anna’s little dining area table.
She might as well have impaled Anna’s heart with that damn angel pin she was wearing again.
“You shouldn’t have put her in this situation in the first place,” Anna’s mother said. She was in the kitchen, whipping up a batch of maple bacon chocolate chip cookies while she supervised Shirley’s visit. “What kind of screening do you do on your employees anyway?”
Anna shot her a shushing look, but Mom was impervious.
A case of the blushes and knee-shakes interrupted Shirley’s usual implacable calm. “Todd did some digging on EFA, Inc. Looks like it was a front to sell off rejected 20/80 biofuel.” Shirley paused. “Jules found them for us.”
Anna hadn’t thought she had any chunks of heart left in her chest, but another piece crumbled off and bounced down her left lung to shatter against her liver.
“She was getting better,” Anna said.
“She was getting filthy rich.” Shirley’s knee stilled. The floor stopped shaking. “That much money would make anyone better. They found her last night trying to cross into Canada.”
“Does Brad know?”
“No idea.”
There was a banging at the door. Kaci flung herself in.
“Hey, sugar. Y’all having a party without me?
” She gave Shirley an appraising glance, flicked a friendly finger-wave at Anna’s mom, then plopped down in the nearest empty seat.
“You treat her good, you hear me?” she said to Shirley.
“Only thing Anna’s ever done wrong is work too hard to take care of herself. ”
“You betcha,” Mom said.
Shirley stood. “I expect things should wrap up quick with Jules in custody. We’ll call when you’re cleared to come back to work.”
The thought of going back to work didn’t inspire Anna with the happiness it should’ve.
The lab was so far away, that crazy place where she’d desperately tried to define herself after her marriage failed.
Instead, it felt like some mystical, fake place of bad memories.
Then she remembered meeting Jackson in the parking lot, and the smell of the cookies made her nauseous.
And that was before Kaci slid a familiar-looking envelope onto the table. “Messenger duty again,” she said with an uncertain smile.
Anna was teary-eyed before she broke the seal. Mom paused to hover over her shoulder.
“You want to be alone?” Kaci asked.
She shook her head. What she wanted was to have gone home over Thanksgiving and not come back.
Would’ve been easier that way. For once, easier sounded better than right.
The message was simple.
Anna Grace,
I will always believe in you.
Love,
Jackson
P.S. Turns out that was Radish snoring. Sorry for—you know.
Kaci squeezed her hand. “He’s not doing too good. Misses you a lot. Sad, what with him not moving for at least a couple years.”
“That’ll make it easier.” Anna swiped at her eyes.
“How about I go burn my school books and dedicate my brain to science now? They can figure out what kind of mutant gene makes me want to continually sacrifice my ability to take care of myself by marrying men who only want someone to put their life in order every time they move.”
“It’s okay to not want him, but don’t lie to yourself about why.”
“You love this one?” Mom asked.
More prickles attacked her eyelids. Her mom still thought Neil might come over for Christmas dinner.
Wouldn’t that be fun.
“Doesn’t matter.” Anna dabbed at her nose. “He called OSI on me.”
“Sugar, he didn’t call on you, he called for you. And I’m right glad he did, because Lance was supposed to be flying that night. I’da had to beat you silly if you let my husband get on a plane with bad fuel.”
Yeah, Anna hadn’t had any heart palpitations over that the last few nights either.
“The news last night said the military doesn’t think the fuel would’ve caused long-term problems,” Mom said. “It wasn’t done to bring planes down.”
Anna wanted to kick her. Kaci’s lips went bloodred against the sudden paleness of her face.
“We don’t put those words in the same sentences around pilots’ wives,” Anna hissed at her mother.
“Well, it wasn’t,” Mom insisted.
“I vote we strap her to a firecracker,” Anna grumbled.
Kaci rubbed some color back into her cheeks. “You gonna blow up all Jackson’s notes?”
She snatched the newest one off the table and shoved it in her pocket.
Kaci chuckled. “Guess that answers the love question, now doesn’t it?”
Anna got the call late Sunday that she’d been cleared to go back to work Tuesday, two weeks before Christmas, one week before she was due to leave for home. Jules had confessed and was supposedly working on a plea deal.
The OSI agent recommended that Anna stay clear of any further contact with her.
The agent didn’t say anything about Brad though. So Monday afternoon, Anna had a late lunch with him.
“You sent that guy to beat me up,” Brad said over his boat of sushi.
“I asked him to do what he would’ve done for a fellow airman.” Anna’s appetite was as nonexistent as it had been following her divorce, but she forced herself to eat some edamame. The salt stung her lips. She liked it. Not as if her lips would feel anything else ever again.
“I’m gonna try to get custody of the kid,” Brad said. “Got an interview later this week.”
“So you and Jules…?”
He didn’t meet her eyes. Couldn’t or wouldn’t, she didn’t know. “Turns out we’ve both got some growing up to do. Don’t think we’re looking for the same things.”
“I’m sorry,” she said.
He lifted a massive shoulder. “Shit happens.” His eyes shifted to her, then away again. “She said to tell you she was sorry. She wanted to be able to take care of the baby. When—you know. Because I was a worthless shit for a while there.”
Back in Minnesota, apologies were met with Aw, it’s okay, you betcha. Here, she supposed blessing Jules’s heart would be mild. “As long as you put half as much effort into fatherhood as you did into being a shit, I think you’ll be fine,” she said.
The staff at the small restaurant swished around them, seating other customers and delivering food, while Anna and Brad ate in silence.
“Appreciate you sending that wake-up call,” Brad said finally.
“You and Jules were good friends to me and Neil when we got here. I couldn’t not do something.”
“Your friend did more than Neil would’ve. Don’t think he deserved you.”
He looked as if he wanted to say more, but she brushed it off. “It is what it is.”
“Think you’ll marry this guy?”
And now she felt as though the salt had settled in her eyes. “No.” She blinked rapidly.
“Dude. Might want to talk to somebody about that.”
She sucked back the sad and tilted her head at him. “You still seeing somebody?”
“Yeah, but he’s not my type. Maybe I should find a girl shrink. Baby’s gonna need a momma. Giggidy.”
He grinned, and Anna laughed.
If Brad could go through losing his brother and his wife and survive, she reckoned she could keep trudging too.
“If I were writing your story,” Mamie said, “you’d sacrifice a whole lot more than your dignity to get her back.”
Jackson thought about dropping the phone down the garbage disposal. “Great plan, Mamie, but sad truth is, she doesn’t want anything from me. Not my help, not my paycheck, not my dignity.”
Most perfect woman God ever created.
Except she didn’t want his love either.
He scrubbed his fork. Hadn’t much felt like eating tonight, but he’d done it anyway. Seemed like something that would’ve been on Anna Grace’s schedule for him.
“Maybe it’s time you figure out what she needs instead of what she wants.” The sound of pins getting bowled over echoed through the phone.
“Anything she needs, she goes out and gets for herself.” He dried the fork, then dropped it into his silverware drawer, right in the spot in his silverware holder labeled forks.
“Maybe she doesn’t know what she needs. Flo, you go on and pass me by. Still gonna kick your hiney even without this frame.” Mamie lowered her voice again. “So tell me, sugarplum, you want to be her hero?”
He didn’t answer.
He was too busy trying to piece together how he was supposed to be smarter than Anna Grace to figure out what she didn’t know she needed.
Conundrum, that’s what it was.
“If you can’t say yes to that, I reckon you ain’t cut out to be that hero she needs.”
He was thinking she might be right about that. Chapped him in places he didn’t like being chapped. “What’s she need, Mamie?”
“What do you need?”
More pins plink-plunked. Jackson felt like the whole bowling alley was lined up in his chest, the old Misses taking shots at knocking down his heart. “I need her to love me back,” he said, sounding as pathetic and unmanly as every man in love he’d ever met.
“Oh, sugarplum, she does. You trust old Mamie on this one. She does.”
“Not so sure about that.”
“Ophelia, this boy ain’t got the sense God gave a plucked rooster when it comes to women. You go on and give him a talkin’ to before he breaks my heart.”
Jackson went back to the sink of soapy water. Miss O’s deep voice came on the line. “How far’d your mamie get with you, hon?”
“’Bout run me up the wall talking in riddles.”
“Alrighty, then, listen on up. Miss O’s gonna tell you a secret.”
If she gave him her recipe for Miss O’s Magic Mallow-bomb shots, he might have to accidentally on purpose drop his phone in the water. “Hanging on your every word, Miss O.”
“You want her, you make her number one. Above your dog, above your job, above yourself. You can do that, you’re worthy of her. If not, you don’t love her enough to keep on bothering her. That clear enough for you, honey pie?”
It was clear.