Chapter 45
I rush into the meeting room at Blossom HQ thinking that I’m late, but when I get there, Adam is waiting for me.
It’s strange, leaving the hustle and bustle of the office, stepping into the quiet meeting room with him. It’s like there’s only the two of us on the earth – which, very sadly, isn’t true.
‘Hey,’ he says with a smile.
‘Hello,’ I reply. ‘I thought I was late.’
I didn’t get much sleep last night, so I probably look as rough as I feel.
‘You’re in luck, Kerry is showing a sponsor around the station,’ he tells me. ‘Technically you’re early.’
‘Well, there’s a first time for everything,’ I say as I plonk myself down next to him, letting out a huge sigh as I rest my head in my hands.
‘Rough night?’ Adam asks, resting his own head on his hands so that we’re at eye level.
‘Something like that,’ I reply, allowing myself a little smile.
I need to tell him what I’m feeling, what has been going around and around in my head – that I can’t see him, or Si, any more, and that I’m moving my things out asap.
I feel a tear escape my eye before I can do anything to stop it.
‘Come here,’ Adam says as he grabs me for a hug. ‘It’s all going to be okay.’
I hug him tightly. Now I’ve got him I don’t want to let him go, but I know that I have to.
‘Listen, don’t make any plans for tonight, okay? Because I’m taking you on a proper date,’ Adam tells me as we hug.
‘You are so amazing,’ I tell him honestly.
‘Don’t you forget it,’ he replies.
How have things gone so wrong? Because not only is there no way for Adam and me to be together, but, in true Lia style, it’s going to have a knock-on effect for me here at work too.
I really have been loving working here, getting back to doing what I do best, but how is that going to work moving forwards? Seeing Adam every day?
Even if I worked remotely, I’d still have to see him sometimes; plus, working for him only actually works if you are the sort of person who can be trusted at home.
I am not that sort of person – especially not if I’m living with my parents. I can just imagine my mum popping in for chats while I’m trying to work, my dad’s radio playing loudly enough to penetrate the walls, my brother’s kids downstairs screaming.
I really don’t want to lose this job though.
There’s something about the chaos of it all that settles me.
You can’t beat the thrill of planning a live event because, after you put in all that hard work, feel all that stress, the event comes along and you get to see it go off without a hitch – and it’s because of everything you did.
This is what I’m good at. I’m great in the chaos – well, professional chaos, at least. Romantic chaos isn’t my strong suit, it turns out.
I make my excuses, leave the meeting room, and go to find somewhere quiet to feel sorry for myself. The toilet feels like too much of a cliché, so I head to the kitchen. There are people in there, but not in the pantry, so I head in to grab an emotional support biscuit.
I’m four custard creams deep when the door opens.
‘Lia?’
‘Hi, Kerry,’ I mumble through a mouthful.
‘Someone said they’d seen you come in here,’ she replies. ‘Is everything okay?’
‘Just fancied a few biscuits,’ I lie.
‘Oh, good, because for a second I thought you might be hiding in here,’ she replies.
‘Haha… haha… no,’ I say, styling it out. I hold the packet out to her. ‘Custard cream?’
She takes one, which I wasn’t expecting.
For a moment, we stand there in silence, both eating biscuits. It’s strangely peaceful.
‘Is everything okay?’ she asks.
‘Mmmhmm, yes, definitely,’ I reply.
‘It’s just… you seem a little stressed, and I’m very aware that we’ve thrown you in at the deep end. It’s a lot of pressure,’ she says.
I shake my head.
‘No, honestly, I’m loving the challenge, work is great,’ I insist. ‘If I seem stressed, it’s nothing to worry about, just a few personal challenges, but nothing I can’t work through, and certainly nothing that will affect my work.’
She nods as she processes what I just said.
‘You’re doing a fantastic job, so I don’t believe anything is affecting your work, and I don’t believe it will,’ she replies – and it’s very reassuring to hear.
‘But, woman to woman, you do need to take care of yourself. When you’re busy, planning, running around like a headless chicken to make sure everything is on track, well, it can be easy to forget to make sure your own wheels are still on the track.
I don’t know what’s going on in your personal life, and you don’t have to tell me, but you do have to take care of yourself. Okay?’
I nod.
‘Good, because if you’re going to be working here full time, then we need you at your best,’ she says, smiling.
Working here full time – oh, that’s everything I want. That and Adam. And I can’t have either, can I?
Still, this festival means a lot to me, and I’m going to do my job and make sure it happens without a hitch.
As for Kerry’s advice, me looking after myself, well, I’ll have plenty of time for that later, won’t I?