Chapter 6
DECLAN
Ihate to admit it, but Nico wasn’t lying when he said I’d remember him the next day. His fucking fat cock stretched me more than I thought possible, especially for my virgin hole.
Fuck, did I really let him fuck me? I don’t even like him. He’s fucking irritating as fuck and he’s always needling me. But I’d be lying if I said what we shared wasn’t fucking magic.
The chemistry between us was undeniable.
It’s been building for the past couple of months, since Carter and Kai got married.
Before that, Nico never had much to say to me.
Probably because I was Carter’s kid brother and our families didn’t like each other.
But now that we have to be around each other and Nico can’t go a minute without fucking with me, it’s more evident.
I thought when he said we’d fuck it would be…just okay. Nothing to write home about. He proved me wrong.
Even though I’ve never bottomed before, I know what Nico did to my body was top-fucking-tier. It hurt when he first slid inside me, the pain of the stretch almost unbearable, but he made it go away so quickly, almost as if my body was made to take his dick.
I’d never come like that in all my years of fucking, not even when I fucked a man for the first time. Something about how sensually he fucked me, how fucking careful he was with my body. It annoys me as much as it arouses me.
I feel like a fucking novice, not being spanked, not having my prostate pegged, and not having kissed anyone. As a twenty-four-year-old man, I should have more experience than I do. Only having two partners, both of which I only fucked from behind, leaves me feeling inadequate.
I shift in my seat to adjust my growing erection, wincing when my asshole twinges. God dammit, that’s going to happen a lot. Maybe going to the club last night wasn’t my best idea.
Or maybe I shouldn’t have been so eager to get fucked.
“You good?” Carter asks, glancing over at me quickly before looking back at the road.
For the past few months, Carter has been taking me on runs with him while he conducts his drug and gun sales. He says soon, he’ll be too busy merging our families and working on the legal side of our business to handle the day-to-day stuff, so he’s entrusting me to take over for him.
I like that he trusts me so much, but I can’t help but think it’s only because there’s no one else that he knows will have his back without question.
And it also makes me feel like shit because I don’t trust Carter.
Not really. With family things, sure. But about my past, my feelings now? Not at all.
“Earth to Declan,” Carter says, snapping his fingers in front of my face. “What’s up? You alright?”
Am I? After what happened with Nico last night, my head is all fucked up.
He kissed me. Long, deep and with feeling.
Sex has always just been a release for me, something I need to help me feel like I’m on an even keel. What Nico did to me last night? That was fucking next level.
In the past, Hendrix vetted the men I slept with, laying down my rules and making sure they were followed.
I wasn’t in it for the romance or trying to date anyone.
I wanted willing men that could take my dick without protection—my piercings make it hard for condoms not to tear.
That meant tests and waiting for results.
Hendrix told me I should try the whole relationship thing. “It’ll stop you from having to get tested every time you wanted to sink your dick into someone,” he joked, making me roll my eyes.
Is Nico the relationship type? Will he get tested if I ask him to, so I can fuck him until he blacks out?
I push that thought away. He and I were one and done. There will be no repeats, no getting tested, and no plowing him into the mattress.
I shift again, feeling the twinge in my ass, sharp and throbbing. Dammit, Nico. Every time I move, he won’t be far from my mind.
Clearing my throat, I answer my brother. “I’m good. What do you need me to do today? Negotiate or have your back?”
He glances at me for a few seconds too long since he’s going fucking seventy down the highway. “I need you to make the deal. But—”
“Use my head, I got it,” I scoff as I look out the window.
“Hey,” Carter says in that gentle brotherly tone that fucking grinds my gears. “I’m not trying to bust your balls. This is a dangerous business and—”
“Don’t you think I know that?” I ask, turning to glare at him.
“Just like you, I grew up in this life, so I know the danger.” My rib throbs and my hand goes to my scar almost reflexively.
“I know the risks. You don’t think I use my head because I don’t make the decisions you would make.
But have I brought down heat on this family so badly that we’re on the police’s radar? ”
Carter peeks at me quickly and shakes his head.
I sit back in my seat and cross my arms. “Stop treating me like I’m gonna blow the lid off our family business. You and Dad need to trust me more.”
“We do, but—”
I cut him off again. “You don’t. If you did, there wouldn’t be a ‘but.’”
We sit in an uncomfortable silence. I’m not willing to admit that sometimes I take shit too far to see what I can get away with and Carter won’t admit he doesn’t trust me to know when to pull back. We’re at an impasse and I’m not going to lose.
No matter what I do and how much I try to be what this family wants, they’re never happy. I might be what they call impulsive, but I get the fucking job done.
After ten minutes of quiet filling the car’s interior, Carter sighs. “Declan, listen. I do trust you. I do,” he says when I make a derisive noise. “I worry, that’s all. You’re my baby brother and I love you. I don’t want to have to identify your body on a slab.”
I blow out a long breath. I understand where he’s coming from, but I’m a grown ass man. I can handle myself. After what happened when we were younger, I know he’s worried, but I’m not that kid anymore. What happened with mom won’t happen to me.
“Yeah, okay,” I mutter, staring out the window again.
He exhales. “How’s the casino? Everything good?”
Nodding, I say, “Yeah. Though I think something is going on with my cage manager.”
“What do you think?”
I shrug. “Not sure. Every time he sees me, he gets this guilty look on his face. Like I know his secret.”
“What do you think it is?”
“Couldn’t say honestly. I’m gonna keep an eye on him, though.”
Carter pulls up to a warehouse that’s owned by the Reyes family and glances at the rearview mirror to make sure our guys and product are behind us. “Be careful. You know how you are.”
With a growl, I say, “Don’t fucking lecture me, Carter. God damn, you don’t even give me the opportunity to fuck up before you bitch at me about fucking up. Fuck, give me a fucking minute to get it wrong before you lecture me about getting it wrong.”
Carter lowers his head and nods. “You’re right. Look, I’m under a shit load of pressure after what happened with the Fensters and then taking over as head of the family. Dad made it look easy, you know? I need you to be me.”
“But I’m not, Carter. I’ll never be you. The sooner you realize that the sooner you’ll realize that I’m not always fucking up. I just don’t do shit how you want me to do it.”
He nods. “I know. Like what happened with Sid.” I roll my eyes, ready for a lecture, but he surprises me when he says, “I would have done the same thing. We don’t tolerate disrespect and he had to be put down.
” Carter places his hand on the back of my neck and rubs it in that way older brothers do that is meant to get under their siblings' skin.
I push him off and Carter laughs. “You did good, little brother.”
In a more serious tone, he says, “I know you’re good at what you do. I’ll try to ease up on you, okay?”
“I’d appreciate it. Stop giving me shit. I work better without pressure, yeah?”
“I know it.” He knocks his forehead against mine. “Now let’s get in here and get this deal done. I need to see that you can handle the hard shit.”
“The Reyes family doesn’t like me.”
He waves me away. “Do you blame them? You threatened to shoot Junior the last time we all met.”
“I was being cautious. Watching your back.”
Carter grunts and gets out of the car. Two Reyes men walk over to us and pat us down. I show them my gun and they eye me, but Juan calls them off.
“They’re good.” He walks over and claps hands with Carter. “How is everything?”
“Good. Thanks for agreeing to let Declan tag along.” He inclines his head toward me, and I greet Juan with a nod of my head. “He’ll manage deliveries from now on.”
Juan glances over at me. “Think you can handle it, baby Whitlock?”
Instead of bristling at the nickname, my brain immediately switches gears to Nico calling me young Whitlock. What the fuck?
Carter grunts. “Don’t call him that. He’s not living in my shoes; he’s walking in his own. His name is Declan.”
Warmth spreads through me at Carter taking up for me instead of letting that ride. I’ll never tell him, but I appreciate it more than he’ll ever know.
Juan inclines his head. “Declan, it is. Let’s step inside and take care of business.”
Our men come over with two crates between them, walking past us to the interior of the warehouse.
We follow behind them, making sure no one tries to run up on us.
After the shit with the Fensters—almost blowing Carter and Gavin up when they did a drug run—we can’t be too careful.
Reyes men bring up the rear and we step inside and I handle my first solo gun sale.