Chapter 3
Pete
I was looking at the clock and waiting for it to turn nine a.m. As soon as the numbers changed, I called Mike.
It was my eighteenth birthday, and I was done waiting.
But I loved my brother enough to know I needed his consent before continuing my Jackson obsession.
I was a good little brother, so I waited for him to wake up properly. It was a Saturday after all.
“Hey, bro, happy birthday!” he greeted, sounding much more awake than I’d expected. “How’s it feel being an adult now?”
“Hey, it’s fine, I guess,” I said, moving on quickly before the nerves truly took over.
“I um, need to ask for your permission on something.” I was so nervous.
If he said no, I couldn’t do it, even if it would break my heart.
I couldn’t ruin their friendship like that.
I knew Jackson was gay, I had spent a LOT of time stalking him to know that.
Even if it had hurt every time I saw a picture of him kissing someone else, I couldn’t get mad.
He wasn’t mine, even if I wanted him to be.
“Sure, what’s up?” he sounded worried now, likely because he could hear how hard this was for me.
“I want to ask for your permission to ask Jackson out.” I held my breath, waiting for the yes or no. Please, please be a yes….
“Oh! um,” he started. I felt my insides crumble. He did not sound happy about it. “I fear you’re not the man Jackson is looking for, Pete.”
What?! “What do you mean by that?!” Wasn’t I good enough for his best friend? Shouldn’t he have said Jackson wasn’t good enough for his little brother? What the hell?!
He sighed. “Listen, and this stays between us, but he likes certain… things in the bedroom, and I don’t see, and don’t want to see you doing those things too. You’re too… innocent.”
Innocent. Of course I was innocent! I’d saved myself for Jackson!
“What do you mean when you say things?” I was too intrigued to just let it slide. Could this possibly be a deal breaker for me?
“BDSM things.” I felt a rush of excitement, envisioning Jackson tying me up while he wore nothing but leather pants. “I accidentally walked in on him last week and… yeah... That’s how I know.”
Jackson had sex with someone else just a week ago? I needed to act quicker. I hated knowing he was with other people, but now I could finally do something about it. I just needed Mike’s approval.
“So… If I were into those things, would it be okay with you if I asked him out?”
He sighed again. “I mean, if you both want to date, I don’t want to stand in the way of that, as long as you don’t make me choose between you. If things end badly, I don’t want to say goodbye to Jackson because of it.”
I was holding back an excited squeal. “I understand that. Thank you, big bro. It really means a lot.” I could ask Jackson out!
“Yeah... I don’t want any details, though! It’s already hard enough just picturing it and I can’t seem to turn my mind off.” I laughed. Mike was the best.
When we’d hung up, I had a new mission. I needed to learn everything about BDSM. And then I would ask Jackson out. I had his number, and I knew where he worked. Everything would go just as planned, just with a bit more leather and whips involved than I’d envisioned.
Pete: I need your help
Dylan: Now?
Pete: Yes, please. I’ll be at your place in ten
Dylan: Bring food
I rolled my eyes at my phone, but I guess Dylan deserved payment for what I was about to ask of him. My best friend would be tested for patience and I’d get to see just how much he truly loved me.
I took Mike’s old car that he’d left for me and Mom to use, and quickly drove through our favorite drive through restaurant, adding a few dessert options to help endear myself to Dylan after I’d requested his help… it would be an interesting night for sure.
Singing along to the radio, I tried to calm myself. This was Dylan, he would understand and help me. He always did. Even if this would test our friendship. Maybe we needed a good friendship test, even if Dylan would 100% decline as soon as I’d told him what I needed of him.
Not wanting to think about it anymore, I cranked up the radio and allowed myself to fantasize about Jackson, again.
It took me twenty-five minutes to get to Dylan’s place because of the food stop, but that was fine. It was best we did it at his place. Him having his own apartment meant privacy, and since I still lived at home, my room wouldn’t be good enough for this sort of… experiment.
“You got food?” Dylan asked as soon as I stepped inside his apartment.
“Hello to you too,” I greeted, holding the bags of food up as an offering along with my biggest grin.
“Hell yeah!” He ran over and grabbed one bag. “Fuck, did you kill someone?” I rolled my eyes at him. “No, seriously. You bought the cinnamon toasties. I only get those when you need something.”
“Nothing big,” I waved him off. “Eat first, then I’ll tell you.”
He narrowed his eyes at me, but his hunger won out. “Fine,” he huffed. “But I can’t enjoy my dessert before you tell me.”
“We eat the food, and then I’ll tell you what I need help with, and then you can eat your dessert.”
“Deal.”
We sat down on his couch, slumping down on either side like we always tended to do. He’d been watching one of our favorite shows when I arrived, so we continued where he’d left off, not speaking as we stuffed our faces.
As soon as he’d downed the rest of his coke, he looked expectantly at me. I was pointedly not looking back. I knew he would help me with anything, but maybe this would be too much to ask for.
“Petey….” He began. I sighed.
“I need your help regarding Jackson.”
“What is it this time? Need me to stalk him again? Because it was so much fun last time I stalked him for hours, I wouldn’t mind acting like a stalker again. All the fun. Best time ever.”
“Oh, will you stop? You offered!”
“I offered to help you out last time! I did not offer myself as your stalking buddy.”
I crossed my arms defensively. “This isn’t like that.”
He rolled his eyes, then sat up straighter. “Then what is it this time?”
“I just got Mike’s blessing to ask him out,” I informed him, rather pleased to tell him the good news.
“Oh, well, that’s a good thing, right? So now you need my help asking him out, or?”
“Or,” I replied, blushing a little. “I um, found out about certain preferences he has in the… um… bedroom.”
His eyes widened. “Fuck. Is he like into some dark shit?”
I laughed, then sobered, because, fuck, Jackson could very well be, but I was in too deep already. Jackson would be mine, darkness and weird kinks too. I would love every part of him. I was the perfect partner in all ways. Or I would be. Soon.
“He’s into BDSM,” I replied. I felt slightly guilty for telling Dylan when I’d promised Mike it would stay between us. But I needed Dylan’s help, and I couldn’t get it without telling him. “I um, don’t know much about it, but I will need to figure out what it means before asking him out.”
“So, you need my help researching it? Were you afraid I would judge you for being into it too? Because I don’t really mind what consenting adults do behind closed doors. I thought you knew this?”
Did I ever. When I told him I was gay at thirteen, he’d been amazing. It hadn’t changed a single thing between us. Maybe it was the fact that he had two mothers, but I liked to think it was because he loved me so much even then that he’d never lose me over my preferences.
“I need more help than research,” I admitted. “I need to test out my kinks.”
“Veto,” he blurted.
I gasped. “You can’t veto me!”
“I’m not having any kind of sex with you!”
“Sex?!” I shrieked. “Who the hell said anything about sex?!”
“You just did! Kinks!”
I threw my hands up, falling back into the couch. “Yes, kinks! No sex!”
“Oh, then why were you so worried about asking me?”
I knew he’d sensed as much. “Because I need you to play the dom.”
It had been two days since I’d told Dylan to research what being a dom meant.
I’d in turn researched subs, figuring this was what Jackson was into.
There was too much info for me to know exactly what Jackson would expect from his sub, and when Dylan had asked if I was sure Jackson was the dom and not the sub, I’d hung up on him.
If all of this research had been in vain, I would lose it.
I couldn’t see Jackson as a sub, but I would love him anyway, even if being a dom wasn’t something I wanted.
Hell, I would feel like a kid playing dress up at Halloween, playing a part while everyone around me could see the kid underneath the superman costume.
I was back in Dylan’s apartment, watching Dylan prepare for tonight’s experiment, testing out my kinks.
“So,” Dylan began, walking back into his living room in tight leather pants and no shirt. I choked on my coke.
“Why?” I croaked, my eyes tearing up as I struggled to breathe.
“What? I’m getting into character,” Dylan defended himself.
“I’m surprised you managed to get into those things.” I pointed to the painted-on pants. I had to admit they looked amazing on him.
“We won’t talk about that.”
Of course not.
“You ready or what? I don’t plan on staying in these for more than an hour.”
I nodded and quickly kneeled in front of him, like I’d seen subs do online.
“Okay, firstly I’ll test a few different kinks I read about where I don’t have to do much… touching.”
“You sure you know what you’re doing?” I asked, worrying about just where and what, he’d read about being a dom. It had only been two days, after all.
“Are you being a brat?”
I rolled my eyes. “Carry on.”
He rolled his shoulders, then closed his eyes. When he opened them, he was in character. He grabbed my chin and smiled down at me; it was so weird I couldn’t do anything other than just stare back in wonder.
“Such a perfect sub, you took me so well,” he praised and I felt myself smile. I liked this already. I wasn’t getting enough compliments as it was. Would Jackson be this kind if I was his sub?