Chapter 9
Pete
Holy. Fucking. Shit.
Jackson was kissing me! I tried to ignore the cheering whoops from Berlina and just allowed myself to bask in the glory that was Jackson’s lips. I hadn’t expected this, fully prepared for him to reject me. But then… he hadn’t.
“Is this for real?” I dared ask as we broke apart for air.
He chuckled low. “I sure as hell hope so.” His hot breath made my wet lips tingle.
“But the man you left me for?” The man you picked over me.
“What about him?” he looked so confused as he searched my eyes.
I sighed with embarrassment. “Were you… did you…”
He broke eye contact and I knew. “I did. I’m sorry. I truly believed you saw me as a sort of big brother and just needed my comfort after what happened. Had I known you wanted me back…”
“Yes?”
“I would’ve never left this couch.”
I sobbed, so unbelievably happy. “You mean that?”
“Of course I do. You’re amazing, Pete. You might not have noticed, but I always paid attention to you whenever I was at your place. I found you so endearing. But I have to admit it wasn’t until yesterday that I found you…”
If almost dying was what had made Jackson pay attention to me, then I’d happily do it all over again. If I knew I wouldn’t actually die, of course.
“Sexy,” he admitted with a rough voice that was filled with need.
My surprise must have been obvious because he started laughing. “You have no idea, do you? How gorgeous you are. How sexy you look wearing my clothes.” I knew I was blushing, the heat from my cheeks was annoying as fuck. Why did he have that effect on me?
“I’ve never been called that before,” I admitted, not looking away from his gaze.
“That’s a damn shame.”
I laughed. “I don’t mind hearing it, though.
” Maybe I should mention how much I loved being praised?
But then that would lead to us talking about what Jackson was into, and was I truly ready for that?
He’d just admitted to wanting me, and I’d told him Mike was okay with us being together.
Maybe the BDSM talk could wait a little.
“I’ll tell you as often as possible, then. But maybe we should steer back to what you said about Mike and us being together.” I nodded, so he continued. “He’s cool with us? I mean, wouldn’t it weird him out? Not that I’m complaining, but this is all just so new.”
“I promised him no details and that was that,” I told him. “He um, told me you likely wouldn’t be into me.”
“Well… I hadn’t seen you as anything but his younger brother until last night, so he was kinda right.
Had you called me over the phone and asked me out, I don’t believe I would’ve said yes.
” It stung a bit hearing that, but I could also see it from his point of view.
I hadn’t been an adult for long, and he was Mike’s best friend.
“He meant that you were into certain… things,” I said, letting him piece it together himself.
He laughed loudly. “Oh man, I truly did scar him for life, didn’t I?”
“Maybe just a tiny bit,” I said with a grin. “He told me you were into BDSM and the only reason he knew was because he’d walked in on you.”
“But you’re into it too, so was it something he didn’t know about?”
Time to be honest. “I um… thought it would be best that I researched it before asking you out.”
His expression turned surprised, then worried. “Wait… you’re not into it?”
I shook my head. “I don’t think so, no. But I’m willing to try it out to be with you,” I quickly blurted out the rest. There was no way he was getting rid of me now.
“I don’t need that in a relationship, Pete. I needed to dominate someone to escape reality and then it became something I had control over, and I craved feeling in control. Truthfully, I’ve felt the need less and less after my father passed.”
Mike had told me about his father, but I figured Jackson wouldn’t need my condolences over a man he’d never cared for. “So, you’re not in the community anymore?” I asked.
“I don’t think I’ll ever be truly out of it, don’t think I ever could. The need could show itself when I’m stressed out or sad. But I know I only want to continue it with you there with me, so if it isn’t for you, then it’s not for me either. If we start dating, you’re my priority.”
I smiled, feeling so unbelievably happy. “If we start dating?”
“Well, I want to see where this thing between us can go, but I’m also realistic. This is very new, Pete. And I have to be honest, I fear you might have this fantasy about me and I won’t be able to live up to that.”
I guessed that was fair. I believed I would have the same worries had our roles been reversed. “I can understand that. I’ve had this crush on you since I saw you for the first time, and you still need to catch up with me.”
“Since then?!” he looked shocked, but then sort of smug. I hit his shoulder playfully and he laughed. “Now I definitely fear I’ll disappoint you.” I heard his words and figured there must’ve been some truth to them for him to mention it twice. What was it about him he feared I wouldn’t like?
I figured we should move back to what was most important at the moment, so I asked, “What do we do now?”
He shrugged. “We do whatever feels natural.”
I cocked my head. “Natural?”
“Yes. I don’t want us to force ourselves to take things slow, or fast, if that’s something neither of us wants. I want us to be honest and do whatever feels right. Starting with us getting to know one another.”
I pointed to where he was still kneeling in front of me. “Let’s start with you getting up from the floor,” I teased. He chuckled and complied, slowly easing up and sitting next to me on the couch. I felt brave in that moment and took his much bigger hand in mine. It felt right.
My phone buzzed and I groaned. I already knew who it was. I looked at the table where it was lighting up, and yep. Dylan. I answered, a little annoyed but Dylan deserved to know I was still okay.
“Hey, Dyl,” I greeted cheerily.
“Hey, you doing better?”
“Much better,” I said, and I meant it. I’d never been better.
“That’s good to hear. Listen, your mom went over and dropped off food for us and with you not being here…”
“Shit. What did you tell her?”
“That you had a work assignment that went bad and stayed with Jackson for a few days.” Dylan luckily knew what I truly did for a living, and with my mom working for the community too, she would understand.
Had I hoped she wouldn’t find out? For sure.
She’d wanted me to wait until I was twenty, like she’d done herself.
But I’d promised I would be careful, so she’d agreed to let me start officially when I turned eighteen.
“Thank you. Was she worried?”
“A little, but it comes with the job, she said.” I could tell by his tone that a little, actually meant a lot.
I sighed. “She didn’t ask further questions?” I knew she must have. My mom had likely asked any ghost she could find and hounded them for information on me. Luckily, there were no ghosts in Dylan’s apartment. I’d made sure of that.
“Well, all I can say is that you should expect a visit from her soon.” The fucker dared laugh after he’d said that. I needed a new friend.
“Thank you. Such a big help as always,” I stated dryly.
“Always happy to help. Now rest so you can heal properly. I need your help beating the next quest.” I rolled my eyes.
I was glad I hadn’t asked Jackson to grab my gaming system, there was no way I would’ve missed out on getting to know Jackson better these next few days.
Dylan would simply have to wait on us gaming together until then.
“Love you,” I sang, then hung up when he’d sung it back to me.
I chuckled as I placed my phone down on the table. “Your mom knows about your job?” Jackson asked.
“Well, yeah. She’s my mom?” Like I could hide anything from her. Not that Jackson knew we worked together, but still.
“And she’s cool with you having such a dangerous job?” Oh, was he worried about me? I couldn’t stop the smile from spreading.
“She is. Are you?”
He frowned. “Honestly, I’m not sure. You just seem so fragile. Not in a bad way! But I feel like I need to protect you.”
“I think that’s cute,” I replied, smiling even wider.
“I’m not cute,” he defended, smiling softly.
“Fine. You’re sexy, is that better?” I was beaming with happiness. I couldn’t believe I was sitting on Jackson’s couch and calling him sexy. Was this my life?
“Much. Now, let’s make some dinner together. I’m starving.”