Chapter Thirty-six — Trinity
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
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TRINITY
Two days at home elapsed in glorious, delicious, delightful fashion. I had some nightmares, but I didn’t have any more flashbacks. The guys picked up on something, but accepted that I still wasn’t ready to talk about it.
What could I say?
That my father’s pack didn’t like me and that I was a coward? That sometimes I still couldn’t quite talk, because it was better to be quiet? I didn’t want them to know that about me. Not that they would judge me, but I didn’t want them to see me as broken, damaged, or weak.
Now, Logan was leaving, and I didn’t like it. “How long?”
“Just the weekend,” he said. Damp hair from his shower after he got back from the beach. “I’ll be back before you know it. But I need to pack so I don’t have to do it at midnight. I hate packing.”
“I also hate packing,” I said. “Which is why I still haven’t gone back to my apartment to get everything.”
Theo stood up from the couch in the living room. “We can have someone pack everything if you want.”
“Hmm. I say yes, but I still want to be there, because there’s stuff that’s destroyed and I’d rather not sort through that here.”
“Good point. I’ll look into getting someone to help.”
“Thank you.”
He kissed me on top of the head and trapped me against the kitchen island. “You’re welcome.”
Logan tugged on my ponytail. “Dibs on you in my bed tonight. So I can survive the weekend.”
“I thought you’d be back before I knew it.”
“I will.” He stole me from Theo. “But you have four other Alphas to distract you. I’ll be all by myself dreaming about you riding my face. The least you can do is give me some fresh memories.” I laughed with him before he kissed me. “I’m going to pack.”
“Kay.”
As soon as he disappeared, I turned on Theo with a grin. “Think I can hide and scare him?”
He chuckled. “Absolutely. Good luck.”
I sprinted toward Logan’s room and paused outside the door, peeking around the corner. He was in the bathroom. Perfect. I practically dove into the closet before he could come out and spoil the surprise.
All our rooms had deep walk-in closets. I got down on the floor and hid behind some pants and jackets. Bad memories tingled at the edges of my brain, as they had for the last week, but it wasn’t the same. No one was locking me in here.
Logan left his room and came back. I heard the sound of a suitcase opening. I could just see that he put it on the bed before coming into the closet. He grabbed things out of drawers and carried them out before returning for more.
I was just about to spring when his phone rang. Shit. No startling him while on the phone before I knew who it was. No guarantee the call wasn’t important.
“Hello?” Logan listened for a second and sighed.
“I thought you got them to agree to do it when I get there?” Silence.
“Seriously? One day is going to make that much of a difference to them?” I could hear his eyes roll.
“Fine. We’ll do it now, but this is the last time I’m putting up with last-minute schedule changes because they can’t get their act together. Their calendar isn’t my problem.”
He flipped the switch right outside to turn off the light and shut the door behind him, muffling his voice. “Yeah, give me a couple minutes to get to the computer in the office.”
Darkness wrapped around me so fast it choked me. It was fine. This was fine. Logan didn’t know I was here. He didn’t put me in here on purpose. I just needed to get out of the closet.
I slowly crawled out from my hiding place and to the door, not wanting to bump into anything by stumbling blindly in the pitch black. The only light was the barest line coming from beneath the door.
There.
Grabbing the handle, chills ran over my skin when it didn’t turn.
“No,” I said out loud, my own voice startling me.
No, this couldn’t happen. I couldn’t be locked in a closet when no one knew I was in here. Trapped. My phone was where I left it, in the kitchen.
Oh, no.
Despite not being able to see anything in the dark, the walls started closing in on me. My throat tightened and breathing suddenly felt like the air was too thick to inhale.
I knocked on the door, hoping that Logan might still be within hearing distance. There was nothing. Bastian and Brooks were down at the big gym, Aiden was in his den of computers that he hadn’t yet moved into the apartment, and I had no idea where Theo was after I left him in the kitchen.
My knocking turned into pounding. So hard that my hand hurt. Nothing came out when I tried to speak or scream. Just the barely-there word please that couldn’t be heard above my hands pounding on the wood.
Maybe he knew I was in here. Maybe this is what they wanted all along?
I shook my head. No. That wasn’t true. This was an accident. It was an accident.
Cecil isn’t here and no one else wants to hear your voice. So shut the fuck up and I’ll let you out when everyone’s gone.
The taste of plastic filled my mouth. Adhesive. Gummy and sickly. I gagged, unable to stop it. “Please.”
Another day, another party in the living room I wasn’t allowed to go to. Not a real party. Val wasn’t fun enough for that. A party where she sold all her bullshit products.
With the number of parties she held, she was either really good at it, or very very bad. Kinda hoped for the second one.
My father’s pack was weird. I’d never met anyone like them. Paige was sweet, but she barely spoke to anyone. Matt was okay, usually, but he sided with Val on everything, so he didn’t like me. Val was the bitch. She hated me, and there was no reason for it.
I did everything I could to stay under the radar while Dad wasn’t home. But I was also like… a human? I couldn’t just sink into the floor and disappear. Even if she wished I would.
My feet were silent on the stairs. I memorized all the creaks and could probably walk these stairs quietly while blindfolded. The most dangerous part of my mission was next. I had to walk past the doorway to the living room.
I never went in there during a party. Learned that lesson. Now I simply made myself as invisible as possible. Sometimes it worked, other times it didn’t. Slowly, I walked past, not even breathing.
Okay. I was past the door. That was good. Everyone was looking at sex toys and lube. Val thought I didn’t know some of what she sold, but I did. The parties with the sex stuff always sold the best and put her in a good mood. I directed my thoughts at the guests. Buy everything, please!
I grabbed a can of soup and used the microwave to heat it up. Quick and easy. Eat it here and then sneak back to my bedroom. My homework wasn’t quite finished. The soup popped in the microwave. It happened sometimes, but not too bad, sound-wise. Not much I could do about it.
Humming softly to myself, I grabbed a spoon and began to eat.
Laughter rose in the other room, followed by Val’s voice. “I’ll be right back. Take your time looking.”
She and Matt came into the kitchen, her eyes full of wrath. I made a mental note to use wrath more often. It was a good word.
“I thought we talked about this, Trinity.”
I stared at her. “About what?”
“About you being here during my parties.”
“I’m not. I’m in the kitchen.”
“And I don’t want you anywhere. I don’t want you seen. How do you think it makes me look if I just have a child running around?” Her voice turned into a whisper-scream.
I shrugged. “Like I live here?”
“No more coming downstairs during parties. Ever. We can hear you in there while you bang around in here. It’s distracting and unprofessional. You’re a teenager now. You should know better.”
Anger and hurt seared through me. “I know that you don’t like me, but you can’t just act like I don’t exist. I’m a person, and I live here. I deserve to be able to use the house and make myself some food. Especially since I’m not bothering you and I didn’t do any banging.”
“We can hear you, Rin,” Matt said. “Val isn’t wrong. A big pop from the microwave, the sound of the chair dragging across the floor.”
“Of course she’s not ‘wrong’ to you. Because I don’t think I’ve ever seen you disagree with her ever.”
Val pinched the bridge of her nose. “Go. Upstairs.”
I raised my voice, and it felt good. Who cared if they heard me now? “No. You’re not my parent and I’m not doing anything wrong. Stop acting like I am.”
Her hand closed around my arm and yanked me off the stool, through the kitchen toward her side of the house. I tried to pull away from her, but she was strong. Ow. I was going to have bruises. “Let me go, Val. What are you doing?”
“I’m taking care of the fucking problem.” She dragged me into her bedroom. I’d never been in here. It smelled like her. Apple juice, that to me smelled like it had been expired for a while.
We were away from the guests, and I didn’t even care now. I screamed at her. “LET ME GO.”
“Get in there.” She threw me inside her closet. My palms burned from the rug. “Make sure she doesn’t leave the closet.”
I jumped up and ran. Matt blocked the way. “I’m going back to my room.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Why do you always agree with what she says? You know she’s batshit crazy.”
Val shoved me again, pushing me backward. “Hold her hands.”
Matt grabbed my wrists, and I fought him. Fought them both. Fought hard. They were too strong and panic started to take over. Tears of fear and frustration screwed with my vision.
The screech of duct tape made me fight more. I heard a grunt when my foot met flesh, but nothing more. The tape wound around my wrists multiple times.
I stopped fighting.
One piece of tape over my mouth.
Two. Three.
More tape on my hands—my fingers—so I couldn’t take it off my mouth.
“There,” she said. Her face was victorious.
“Better. Cecil isn’t here and no one else wants to hear your voice.
So shut the fuck up and I’ll let you out when everyone’s gone.
” She leaned closer. “And if you tell him any of this? He’s out of the pack.
Do you want that? You want to be the reason your father gets kicked out and lives on the street?
Because it will be your fault, and only your fault. Got that?”
All I could do was lie there.
She flipped off the light and shut the door.
I heard it lock.
There was so much tape I couldn’t even hear myself cry.
This wasn’t real. I wasn’t with Val. It wasn’t real. It wasn’t happening again. There wasn’t tape on my mouth or hands.
I banged on the door again and again and again. No sounds on the other side of the door but dead air. What if they left and never came back? What if I was going to be stuck in here? What if Dad never returned and Val and Matt decided this was where I lived now? What I never got to speak again.
The flood of adhesive and tape on my taste buds had me heaving. Bile rushed up, and I couldn’t stop myself, throwing up on the carpet. I scrambled away from it, retreating to the place where I’d hidden as best I could.
If they found out I’d thrown up, it would be so much worse. Maybe I could hide from them. Maybe they’d think I passed out.
I crawled past something soft that smelled good. Cinnamon and sugar. I loved that scent. That scent was perfect. It made me feel better. But why did it make me sad? Why wasn’t it here with me?
Why did it leave?
I gagged again, tears running down my cheeks. My mouth tasted bad, but I couldn’t make any more sound. Throwing up was bad enough. They had to let me out sometime, right?
Maybe Dad would decide he didn’t go and come back.
Maybe someone would find me.
Help me.
Hear me.
I sobbed into the stolen shirt, curled up as tight as I could manage, and closed my eyes. Be quiet, and everything would be okay. Quiet and okay. Quiet and okay.
Quiet and okay.