Chapter 16
Bryson
“Such a good girl.” My cock is going to revolt. I’ve never experienced anything like this. I wasn’t kidding when I told her I’m getting a sadistic fix.
When I strike a masochist with any implement, I’m fueled by the way they arch and moan. I enjoy the lines that show up on their bodies. It gives me a rush.
But this does, too. It’s almost the same thing. Lillian arches and moans, too. She’s fucking aroused. It’s not from pain. But in a way, I suspect she’s experiencing discomfort. The ache that comes from needing to come but being denied. I know that pain. I’m experiencing it, too.
Instead of red lines or palm prints coming up on her skin, I’m watching her nipples harden and her pussy drip. The goosebumps on her arms and legs and even her torso are the marks of her torture.
There is a difference that’s bigger than the fact that I’m not striking her. It’s rare for me to get aroused by dominating a woman. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a woman under my care who turned me on while I struck their skin.
I’m so fucking horny right now I’m going to need to get release one way or another soon. I won’t take her pussy, but I will come in my hand.
“Please…”
Oh, fuck. That tone. The way she begs so sweetly. It makes my cock twitch.
I set my palms on her inner thighs, giving her some relief in a roundabout way. The pressure gives her the opportunity to avoid having to keep her legs spread on her own.
Lillian arches her head back, her breasts rising off the bed. I haven’t touched her anywhere sexual. Hell, this is the first time I’ve made contact with her since I tied her up. Before that, the only thing I did was tap and circle her nipples briefly.
“Begging will never work when I’m punishing you, naughty girl. It will only make your discipline last longer,” I remind her.
She moans. It’s fucking precious.
We don’t need toys right now. If I even picked up the bag and pretended to take something out, she would orgasm. We’ll have to save them for another time. Perhaps later, when I actually let her come.
I ease my hands closer to her pussy and lower my gaze to her soaking entrance as I use my thumbs to open her.
“Oh God…”
“I’m not God, naughty girl, but if you want to call me that, I guess you can,” I tease.
“Bryson…” Her voice is low. A growl. She’s desperate.
“It’s a mixed feeling, isn’t it? On one hand, it feels so fucking good to be this aroused for a prolonged period of time. On the other hand, you want to scream, don’t you?”
“Yes, Sir.” Her words are breathy. She’s panting now. Her body starts quivering.
I stare at her pussy, all swollen and wet, for a long time while her arousal continues to grow. It’s dripping out of her. Fuck, her pussy is pretty. It’s perfection. I want to eat it. But I can’t do that now. I can’t do anything now. I’ve tormented her long enough.
After easing her legs together, I reach above her head to release her wrists.
Her eyes are wide and confused. She’s in subspace. I did almost nothing, and my girl is in subspace.
I look around, pleased to find a soft blanket at the end of the bed. I quickly wrap her up in it and scoop her into my arms. Cradling her against my chest, I kiss her temple and carry her out of the room.
I’m not sure she even knows where we are or what’s happening as I hold her with one hand and open her fridge with the other. My intention is to find a bottle of water, but I score one even better. Lillian has a sippy cup of water sitting on the shelf.
“You need to drink, sweet girl,” I encourage as I hold the mouthpiece to her lips.
She whimpers and turns her head away, fighting me.
Can’t say I’ve ever had a submissive reject water after a scene, but this is the first time Lillian has ever experienced something as intense as this, and she’s beyond confused. Plus, she’s so fucking adorable I can’t stand it.
I dominated her so powerfully without doing much of anything.
It was enough to nearly bring her to orgasm, and fuck if I don’t feel the same rush I get from spanking or flogging someone.
I’m not sure it will always work this way.
I think I’m just startled from the shock of how easily she submitted to my demands.
When I dominate someone at the club—someone who is usually strapped to a St. Andrew’s cross or a spanking bench or any number of apparatus—I get a workout. I’m often sweating and exhausted when the scene is over, especially if I do several in one evening.
I might not be sweating after dominating Lillian, but I’m wrung out nonetheless. I carry her over to the sofa and lower myself in the middle before encouraging her to drink again.
“Lils, this is not optional. You have to open your mouth for me. You need fluids after a scene like that.”
She furrows her cute brows at me. It’s hard to tell if she fully understands, but finally she opens her mouth.
“Good girl.”
Once she takes a sip, something clicks in her brain and she downs the entire cup of water.
I hold her in my arms for a while, kissing her forehead frequently.
I like having her close like this. I’m also so fucking glad this happened at a time when I could ease her out of subspace.
We’re in no rush. In fact, I don’t care if I have to hold her all afternoon and night. That wouldn’t be a hardship.
My head is spinning from what just happened.
I went into this thinking it was a punishment, but it turned into something much bigger.
I’ve never punished a submissive. It’s not something I do.
Hell, I’ve never been in a relationship with a submissive.
My usual is to scene with people and go home.
I’ve never met with anyone outside of the club.
I’ve never brought one into my home. I’ve never dominated someone in a sexual manner while kneeling between the legs of her naked body.
Lillian is experiencing a million firsts, but so am I.
She purrs in my arms, snuggling in deeper as she comes back into her body. Eventually her arms come up around my neck. If she’s aware of the blanket falling down to expose her chest, she doesn’t acknowledge it.
I shift her weight so she’s sitting more upright.
“What happened?” she finally asks in a soft voice.
“You’re in a state we call subspace.”
“What does that mean?”
“It happens to some people during a deep, intense submission. It’s sort of like floating out of your body. At least that’s what I’m told. I’ve seen it many times. I’ve never experienced it, though.”
“We didn’t do a scene. What do you mean?”
“We did, sweet girl. Anytime I dominate you like that, we’re in a scene. You were submitting to me so deeply, Baby. You slipped into another state of mind. When that happens, it’s my responsibility to provide you with aftercare like I did last week.”
She lifts her head and stares at me. She’s more lucid now, but there’s still confusion behind her eyes. “You didn’t do anything.”
I smile. “Sometimes it’s like that. You didn’t need me to do anything.
The suggestion was enough. You were naked and vulnerable.
You obeyed my orders when I told you how to stand and then commanded you to lie on your back.
I think you slipped into a blissful state before we got to that, but when I restrained your hands, it pushed you over the edge. ”
“Did you touch me? I don’t remember that part.”
“I didn’t, sweet girl. Only your thighs. You didn’t need more.” I stroke a lock of hair back from her forehead. I love that she’s seemingly not aware that she’s naked. It also tells me she’s still working toward coming out of subspace.
She’s frowning.
“Some people are more susceptible to subspace than others. You need to be aware that you could easily slip into it. I’m extremely glad I was the one with you today, but there might be a day when I’m not with you and someone else doesn’t understand what’s happening to you.”
I hate those words even as they’re leaving my mouth.
I want to take them back. Lillian is mine.
She’ll never be in a situation where someone else is dominating her and has to provide aftercare.
If I had any doubts, they poofed out of existence today, but I’m not going to freak her out by reiterating how deeply I feel about her right now.
“Do you remember being tied to your bed, sweet girl?” I lower my finger so I’m stroking her cheek now.
“Yes.”
“Do you remember how aroused you were?”
She squirms. “Yes, Sir,” she whispers.
“I’ve never seen anyone that turned on without being touched, Lils. It was hot as fuck but also kind of scary.”
Her lips quiver. “I wanted you to touch me.” A tear leaks from the corner of her eye.
My heart is in my throat. I know she needs to cry. That’s not unusual. And I will hold her for as long as it takes and wipe her tears. Subdrop often includes tears.
I lean closer to her face and kiss her forehead. “It’s possible that edging is too much for you, sweet girl,” I admit. “It may take you too far. Discipline is not meant to push you so far that you want to stab me in my sleep.”
She gasps and sits ramrod straight, the blanket falling completely to her thighs. “I don’t want to stab you in your sleep.
I chuckle. “Sorry. I was exaggerating, Baby.” She’s taking me super literally because she’s not fully back in her body.
“I just wanted to come.” She’s dead serious. This isn’t funny.
I rub up and down her spine, forcing myself to keep my eyes on hers and not let them stray to her fucking sexy breasts. “I know, sweet girl. Why don’t we go into your playroom and find something to do?”
She stares at me for long moments before finally nodding slowly.
She’s vulnerable. I think she’ll benefit from being in Little space.
She won’t have to make any decisions. When I’m confident she’s back inside her body enough for me to leave her alone for a few minutes, I’ll make her dinner. One step at a time.
I tuck my arms under her and lift her into my embrace again as I stand. I don’t even bother to cover her chest. The first thing I’m going to do when we get to her playroom is find something to dress her in. Something Little.
She clings to me, her grip around my neck stronger, indicating she’s coming out of it.
There’s a dresser in her playroom, and I aim for it, opening the top drawer. “Let’s find some clothes for you to wear.”
Surprising me, she leans over, rummages around, and plucks something pink out of the drawer. “This.”
“Okay then.” Grateful there’s a loveseat in this room, I head toward it next and tentatively stand her on her feet in front of me as I sit. I take the pale pink material out of her hand, brace her with my thighs around her knees, and let the blanket fall to the floor. “Arms up, sweet girl.”
She lifts her arms for me without hesitation.
I decide this is a nightie as I help her get her arms in the sleeves and let the garment flutter around her.
As soon as it’s in place, I lean back and look at her. “Fucking hell, naughty girl.”