Chapter 18
Lillian
Bryson is quieter than he’s been since I met him. Maybe it’s because he gets that way when he’s focused, but I don’t think making boxed mac and cheese is stressful enough to require much focus.
His brow has been furrowed since I told him about Herman and my parents. I get it. He’s worried. I don’t think it’s necessary, but I’m not an overprotective Dominant.
“Are you mad at me?” I ask tentatively from where I sit on the counter. Bryson lifted me and sat me on my naked butt next to the sink so I’d be close while he boiled water.
He jerks his gaze to mine. “Mad? Why would I be mad?”
“Because I didn’t tell you about Herman.”
He sets the spoon down and comes over to me, his hands gripping my thighs.
“You did tell me your parents had wanted you to get married. You just didn’t make a big deal out of it.
I didn’t realize they’d picked him out and the china pattern, too.
But Lils, I’m not mad. Not even close. Concerned, yes. Mad, no.”
“I didn’t mean to keep it from you intentionally. I kind of put it out of my mind once I got here and started to feel free. I was startled when you asked me why I’d left home, and I realized I’d never told you the specifics.”
“I get it, sweet girl. Plus, why would you have told me something so personal before now?”
I reach for his face and cup his cheeks. “We’ve been talking every day for over a month. I probably should have mentioned I literally ran away from home and left behind…whatever the hell Herman is.” If I were Bryson, I might be miffed.
“I knew you left home to join your sister. I was aware your parents were stuffy and drove you crazy. I assume you didn’t mention this arranged marriage because it meant nothing to you.”
“Exactly. It was never going to happen. It was simply the straw that broke the camel’s back. I had enough, and I left. I came to find Simone.”
“Do you have any other suitors I should be worried about?” he says, his voice slightly joking but also partly serious.
I shake my head. “Nope. Just the one. It’s not as though he ever asked me to marry him.
It was assumed. We never so much as went on a date.
He may not have even known about the engagement party my mother was planning.
That could have been all her. It’s not like I gathered my skirts and fled from the altar.
This was about my mother and the ridiculous pressure she was going to put on me to marry someone because it would be a good financial arrangement for her purse. ”
He nods. “I hope so, but, Lils, to be safe, I’m going to have someone dig around a bit to make sure no one is actively looking for you.”
“Okay.” I don’t argue with him. For one thing, it wouldn’t do any good.
For another thing, it’s kind of hot how concerned he is.
“You might be wise to check with Camden. I suspect he’s already hired someone.
When I first arrived, I used a company called Black Blade Protection to find Simone.
Apparently, Camden knows the owner, Blade.
He made it clear that no one from that company should give out any details about Simone or me to anyone who inquires. ”
“Yeah, I know the guys at Black Blade Protection. I’ll talk to Camden.” Bryson gives me a quick kiss before returning to the pot of boiling pasta. “Don’t get used to this, by the way. I’d be a horrible Daddy if I let you eat boxed mac and cheese with no vegetables on the regular.”
I giggle. “What if I bat my eyes and act really Little?”
He laughs, shaking his head in dismay. “Such a naughty girl.” He glances at me. “I’m running out of ways to possibly punish you. We’ve eliminated spanking and edging. I’m going to need to get really creative.”
“Or you could not discipline me,” I suggest, grinning.
He pulls the spoon out of the boiling water and points it toward my knees. “The way you’re gripping your thighs together tells me you’re already plotting how to misbehave and hoping I come up with another way to punish you.”
I glance down and pretend not to understand. “What do my thighs have to do with anything?”
He smirks. “You are a bad, bad girl. Now you’re telling fibs. I’m older, remember? I can tell when you’re aroused without looking directly at you. You’ve learned that the thought of being punished makes you horny, and that’s causing you to plot all sorts of ways to misbehave.”
I blush. He’s right. I have to purse my lips to keep from laughing. When I’m able to control myself, I finally respond, “You’re the one who said Littles intentionally act up because they like being disciplined.”
He chuckles. “I’ve created a monster.”
“What’s next? Timeouts?” I shiver as I say it.
I’m not sure how I feel about standing in the corner.
I know Camden puts Simone in timeout. It seems really boring, but I’m pretty sure she’s titillated by the idea.
I suspect he doesn’t simply order her to stand in the corner and leave her there. There must be more to it.
“Mmm. We’ll see.” He doesn’t elaborate. It’s possible he has no clue what to do next.
It’s strange that I reacted so strongly to being naked. I thought he was going to touch me and even use one of the new toys on me so I would get really horny. I was prepared for edging to entail overstimulation and then pulling back repeatedly without letting me come.
I’m slightly embarrassed by the fact that it took so little to get me aroused enough to almost orgasm, so turned on that he hadn’t even touched me yet.
I watch in silence as Bryson drains the water and stirs in the milk, butter, and fake cheese powder. He shakes his head while he does it. “I can’t believe you think this tastes good.”
“Did you have it as a child?” I ask him.
“A million times.”
“Well, I didn’t,” I point out. “Never even tried it until I moved here. I remember hearing other kids talk about it while I was growing up, but we didn’t have it in my house. So, I was intrigued. Turns out I’m now jealous of everyone else’s childhood. You should see what’s in my freezer.”
He stirs the delicious yellow-orange goodness and scoops it into bowls before sliding over to open my freezer.
“Daddy!” I shout. I didn’t mean for him to actually look.
He lets go of the freezer door and twists around so fast I gasp.
“What’s wrong?”
He takes two long strides to get to me. His hands come to my face, and he leans in close. “Nothing’s wrong. You called me Daddy.”
I gulp. Shit. I did. “I, uh… Sorry. It slipped out.”
He shakes his head. “Don’t be sorry. I liked it.” He steps even closer, pinning my knees against his stomach before bringing his lips to mine. He kisses me briefly and then all over my face until I’m giggling.
“Say it again, Lils.” More kissing, nibbling a path to my ear. “Again, sweet girl. I want to hear it again.”
“Daddy…” I breathe out.
He inhales deeply and leans back. “Yeah, I like that.”
“Are you sure? You’re not a Daddy. You’ve told me that.”
“And I’ve also told you I’m your Daddy, haven’t I?”
I swallow. “Yes, Sir.”
He kisses my nose. “We’ll work through what this thing is going to look like as we go along. We’re winging it, Lils. You and me. Our dynamic might not resemble anyone else’s, but I’m committed to doing whatever it takes to be what you need me to be.”
My heart is pounding. I know he’s serious.
I won’t question him. I part my knees and wrap my legs around his waist. “Don’t forget that I’m new to this lifestyle, so I don’t have any idea what the dynamic should look like.
My only examples are Camden and Simone, and Jameson and Natasha.
Those four are very deep and intense. I doubt that’s something I’d be interested in. ”
He threads his fingers in my hair, holding my head steady. “Lils, you are deep and intense. Everything about you is. Hell, you almost came from me looking at your fucking sexy body. That’s pretty fucking intense.”
My face heats.
“You may not need to be Little as many hours a day as your sister or Natasha, but I’m realizing it doesn’t matter.
If someone had asked me six weeks ago if I would have been interested in being a Daddy, I would have laughed at them.
But that was before I met you. Turns out that when you meet the right person, you’ll do anything for them.
It’s not a hardship, either. I’ll do whatever you need because I want to, sweet girl.
I want to Daddy you because you crave it.
I want to do every damn thing that makes you squirm. It turns me on.”
I breathe shallowly, probably not getting enough oxygen.
“Do you know what I want to do right now, though, Lils?”
“What?” I murmur.
“I want to carry you into your bedroom, spread you wide open on the bed, and eat your pussy until you scream my name.”
I stop breathing. He better not be kidding.