9. Chapter 9
Daria
I will not cry today. I will not cry today.
I repeat the mantra approximately a thousand times while Jamie, Briar, and I get ready in an upstairs bedroom at Theodore Bainbrooks’s estate. Not only is his house more like a sprawling mansion, but it’s set on a huge, lush piece of property overlooking the lazy Portage River.
Jamie and Parker couldn’t have picked a better place to have an outdoor wedding.
But with all this day’s breathtaking beauty comes a bitter sort of ache in the center of my chest. I’ve tried to convince myself I’m not losing my best friend, and that I’m gaining another permanent one with Parker.
But with having to find a place to live at the same time, my heart seems to believe that the two are inextricably linked. I’m losing my roommate. Losing the closeness that living with someone brings. On my own again with no one to go home to after a long day of soul-sucking retail work.
“You okay over there?” Jamie’s voice drifts across the large room from her perch in front of the floor-length mirror. Her gorgeous dress accentuates her natural beauty, her red hair framing her neck and face like a fiery halo. Yet she eyes me with something that resembles pity.
I hate it.
I force a smile I hope looks effortless. “I’m fine, why?”
Briar speaks up before Jamie gets the chance. “You just sighed so loud that everyone in the building probably heard it.”
My gaze flies to the closed door, wondering if there’s any way that could be possible. Probably— hopefully —not. The guys are all getting ready across the hall. The last thing I need is for Dane Sees-Too-Much Kent to detect an ounce of sadness in my words, sounds, or expressions today.
My feelings for him are already starting to morph from something that feels less like hate to more like respect. Seeing a big strong man blowing up balloons to help an elderly grandpa with dementia will do that to even the most hardened woman.
Ugh.
Jamie lets out a soft chuckle, and I blink, remembering I was supposed to be convincing my friends I’m one hundred percent fine with all that’s happening today.
That I’m blissfully ignorant to the fact that I only have a matter of days before I need to find a decent place to live and that I’m more than ready to party hard to celebrate these blessed nuptials.
Double ugh.
“I’m totally fine,” I say with a wave of my hand. “The sigh was just me letting out my frustration that the cake won’t be here as early as we’d hoped. If I would’ve double checked on that, it might have been taken care of.”
It’s a total, blatant lie, though I am mildly frustrated that the cake decorator got the time for the reception wrong and won’t be here until probably ten minutes before Jamie and Parker need to cut it.
Jamie smiles, then sashays toward me, gripping the side of her long skirts.
“D, it’s not going to be a problem. If they’re late, we’ll get a partial refund.
At least, that’s what the decorator said.
I think it’s in her best interest to have it here on time.
” She grabs my hands and squeezes. “Besides, that wasn’t your fault.
Parker and I arranged the cake. Somehow, something just got lost in translation. ”
Again, I sigh to really play up my feigned frustration. “I know. But as maid-of-honor, it was my job to double check everything, and I missed this.”
“Stop,” Jamie chides. “You have been an amazing maid-of-honor, and you know it.” Her smile widens before she pulls me in for a hug. I close my eyes, soaking up this moment with my best friend before she married the love of her life and he whisks her away on their honeymoon.
Despite her reassurances, I know everything will be different when they return home. It’s inevitable. And I don’t fault either of them for it. It’s only natural that a husband and wife would want to be closed off in their lovey dovey cocoon of infatuation for a while after their marriage.
Yet I can’t quiet the jealous juvenile voice that cries out inside me…. But what about me?
“Group hug,” Briar whisper squeals, wrapping her arms around us both.
She squeezes tight enough to make us all start giggling before we step away from each other.
“Aside from the cake, this day has been absolutely perfect. I have no doubt everything will go off without a hitch.” Briar beams, looking like a blonde goddess with her tan skin, white-blonde hair, and rosy, pink lips.
“Thanks, guys.” Jamie releases a shaky breath, then runs a hand down her bodice just as a knock sounds on the door. Her wide eyes meet mine as a masculine voice calls out, “It’s time.”
The gentle strum of a guitar fills the air as Briar and I make our way toward the small sea of white chairs full of people eager to witness the union of two of the best people I’ve ever known.
Our male counterparts, Parker’s brothers, are already here, waiting for us to join them. Jamie and Pops hang back under the pergola near the mansion we just exited. The lush green grass sinks a bit under our feet due to a recent rain but thank God for the platform sandals that keep our feet dry.
Ahead of me, Briar links her arm with Parker’s oldest brother, Logan, sending him a shy smile as she does. Logan barely acknowledges her presence, just moves forward slowly like we were trained to do in rehearsal.
Reluctantly, I let myself meet Dane’s eyes and suck in a quick breath. Just like at our first meeting, he looks way too handsome. He’s practically mouth-watering in a black tux with his perfectly styled ebony hair.
If it weren’t for the grimace he sends me, I might have swooned the same as I did the night we met. It takes incredible mental effort to keep my knees from wobbling. I remind myself that Dane is off limits, he’s a player. A flirt. In every way that matters, he’s bad for me .
You’re not looking for a serious boyfriend anyway, my hardened heart reminds me. We don’t do permanent, remember?
Dane holds out his elbow for me to take, not once taking his eyes off mine like I wish he would. I raise an eyebrow in silent challenge and accept his outstretched arm, placing my fingers against his bicep.
Wrong move, Daria.
His muscles twitch under my touch, and it takes every bit of strength I possess not to press my fingers more firmly into the playing muscles. The urge to trace the curve of his arm, to memorize the definition I know is there overwhelms me and I almost sway on my feet.
“Easy there,” his deep voice murmurs too close to my ear. “You feeling all right?”
I straighten and spread my mouth into a toothy smile. “I’m fine,” I say between gritted teeth.
The weight of his stare nearly bowls me over, but I refuse to let him see how it affects me. Instead, I grip his bicep tighter for balance. Big mistake because it twitches again as if my touch shocks him.
“ You feeling all right?” I ask in a mocking whisper.
“I’m fine,” he echoes, stiffening his posture. “Let’s just get this over with.”
I pretend not to let his words offend me, but if I’m honest, they sting a bit. They shouldn’t. I don’t want to be around him any more than he wants to be around me. Yet even in all our sparring matches, he’s never once been rude to me.
I ignore the way my breathing picks up and focus on Briar and Logan heading toward the pastor at the front of the crowd. The kind-looking man stands with a congenial smile under an archway comprised of pink and white flowers, complete with twisting vines and greenery.
Parker stands to the right of the arch, making a striking picture. His usually messy dark hair is tousled just slightly, enough to look perfect and purposeful, and his bright eyes glisten. He’s buzzing with energy, even more so than usual, as he chews on his lower lip.
As practiced, Briar and Logan separate before taking their designated positions on either side of the arch. Briar turns my way with a slight dip of her chin—a silent encouragement that I can endure Dane’s stuffy ego for a little while longer.
I take the first step, and Dane matches my stride, the scent of his rainwater cologne drifting toward me. My lungs expand and I inhale against my will. Stupid, traitorous body.
Heads swivel our way as we pass, but I ignore everyone and everything as I will my body to control itself. My plastic smile falters the slightest bit when I lock eyes with Gladys. Her enthusiastic head bobbing and matching thumbs up have me closing my eyes in exasperation.
Ever since meeting Dane at our little lunch run-in, the woman has commented on his… assets …like her life depends on convincing me of his attributes. But it’s really not necessary. I get it. The guy is beautiful. But he’s also big-headed and bossy and probably flippant in the way he treats women…
We reach the front, and I release Dane’s arm, making my way to Briar’s side. I stop in my designated spot and turn, facing the crowd. Jamie and Pops stroll forward, and the music changes.
Pops gives Jamie a kiss on the cheek at the end of the aisle before Mr. Kent helps him to a seat at the front. When he’s comfortably settled, the guitarist plays the opening for the song Jamie wanted to sign for Parker.
She meets his eyes, glowing with pride and love, then begins to move her hands in time with the music. It took her a while to get the signs for this song right, but I’m so proud of my friend for making this happen for the man she loves.
My gaze flits to Parker. Dane grips Parker’s shoulder while the groom visibly fights back tears. I’ve never seen him so choked up, and despite my best efforts, moisture tingles behind my eyes.
I blink it away and turn my attention to Jamie. She’s crying too, but with a smile born of sheer giddiness. Her love for Parker shines through each move of her hands, each word of the lyrics she mouths along with the song.
It’s a beautiful, touching moment that no one in attendance will soon forget.