14. Chapter 14
Dane
Family dinners are usually a highlight of the month for me. But I’m admittedly a bit nervous for this one. Walking into my parents’ house while living with a woman I’m not married to, something my mom used to threaten beating me with a rolling pin for if I ever did, doesn’t exactly excite me.
It’s not a sure thing that they’ll find out about my current living situation, but there’s a good possibility that since Logan knows, they’ll know too.
It would be just like him to blurt it out at dinner just to be a butthead.
He claims that every mean thing he does now is payback for when I used to play pranks on him in high school.
And I mean, fair enough. But this is one time I wish he won’t open his mouth.
Plus, Parker’s absent. My biggest ally won’t even be there to back me up. Daria is his wife’s best friend, so if anyone could help Mom see I’m not doing anything wrong by allowing her to live with me, it would be him.
I park the car in my parents' driveway and lean back with a sigh. I came way too close to inviting Daria to come with me tonight. Part of me still feels bad for flipping out on her the other day. But the real reason I wanted to invite her was so my parents could see for themselves how much we don’t get along.
Mom knows Daria, likes her, even insinuated at the wedding that we should be a couple.
But once she witnesses how much Daria despises me, she’ll see for herself there’s nothing romantic between us and has nothing to worry about with us living together.
But I didn’t have the heart to invite my roommate. Not after the fight we had. She’s avoided me like the plague since our altercation. I don’t blame her. I’d avoid me too.
Speaking of avoidance, I tap my thumbs against my steering wheel and wonder if there’s any way I can get out of this dinner, if only to avoid being found out.
A knock on my driver’s side window startles me back to reality.
I should’ve known I’d never be able to slip out of Alexandra Kent’s clutches.
“Why are you sitting out here?” Her voice and the gardening tools she’s wielding are both raised. “Food’s inside.” She points toward the house with her trowel, then heads in that direction. Having little choice but to follow, I exit my car and pray that the topic of my new roommate doesn’t come up.
As soon as I step inside, the savory smell of Mom’s signature stew has me salivating. One good thing about family dinner is that I never leave hungry and usually always go home with some leftovers.
“Dane, come help in the kitchen,” Mom calls as I slip off my jacket and hang it by the door. Passing by the den, where I already know Logan and Dad are holed up, I pause. “Hey.”
“Hey, Dane.” Dad and Logan greet me simultaneously from their respective recliners, not bothering to turn around. “Think Mom needs you in the kitchen,” Logan adds.
Now highly suspicious, I grit my teeth and wander that way. Why isn’t Logan helping in the kitchen? He’s probably been here since he got off work, as per his usual routine. Did he already tip Mom off about Daria?
When I enter the kitchen, rustling from the pantry clues me in on Mom’s whereabouts. “Check the roast, will you?” she asks.
My nose guides me to the crockpot on the counter.
I lift the lid and inhale, instantly taken back to my childhood.
With a glance toward the pantry to make sure Mom can’t see me, I grab a fork and tear off a piece of the roasted meat.
It’s so good I nearly groan when the savory flavors hit my tongue.
“No taste-testing!” I jump at the little woman behind me before she rips the fork from my grasp and points it at me. “I said check the roast, not eat it.”
“Sorry. It’s just so good.”
She waves me off, spinning toward the sink and cleaning the fork I just used. “I know. When have I ever served a bad roast?”
I bite back a laugh. Humility has never been one of Mom’s attributes. “Never, Mom.”
After drying off the fork, she points at the oven. “Will you take the bread out and slice it up for us?”
Homemade bread too? Maybe this dinner won’t be so bad after all.
I obey, using a potholder from the drawer, and set the bread on the large cutting board in the center island. As soon as I begin slicing, I realize the knife is a bit dull. “Want me to sharpen your knives for you?”
“No, your dad can do that.” She steps up next to me and transfers the newly sliced pieces of bread to a cloth-covered breadbasket. “What I want you to do is stop living in sin.”
The knife slips from my grasp, and I almost cut through my finger. Thankfully, it’s too dull to do much damage. Biting back a curse, I raise my hands in a defensive gesture and face her. “Mom, please. Don’t do this. I am not living in sin .”
“So you admit that a beautiful woman is living in your apartment?”
I frown. “It’s just Daria, Mom.”
One of her dark eyebrows arches, hidden beneath her unruly curls. “You do not think she is beautiful?”
I let out a frustrated sigh and reclaim the knife. “I’ll admit Daria is beautiful. But—”
“You’re living with temptation right under your nose. At all times. If you’re not sleeping together—”
“Mom!” I scrub my hands down my face in exasperation before lowering my voice. “Mom, we are not sleeping together . We aren’t even dating. She’s Jamie’s friend and she needed a place to stay. Please don’t make this a bigger deal than it is.”
The glare Mom sends me could melt the very tiles I’m standing on. “I know you think my traditional ways are outdated—”
“Mom—”
“But I cannot give my blessing to a son who does not commit to a woman before he takes her to his bed.”
Oh, for the love. If I could force my heart to stop beating so I’d just die right now, I think I’d seriously consider it.
“Mom,” I say, trying my best to keep my voice even and controlled. “I have not taken her to my bed, nor will I. We aren’t even friends. Daria can’t stand me, and honestly, she’s not easy to live with. She’s kind of a slob.”
I wince, knowing that isn’t quite right. Sure, she’s messy and doesn’t put the plates back the way I like them, but slob might be taking it a bit far. “She’s not a slob, just…messy. And she’s only living with me because she has nowhere else to go.”
I place my hands on Mom’s shoulders to try and settle her while maintaining eye contact. “Have more faith in your parenting, okay? You know I wouldn’t intentionally disrespect you, but you also need to realize that I’m a grown man and I’ll live my life how I see fit.”
Mom stiffens, but I don’t stop. “But that doesn’t mean I’m going to live with a girl I’m dating. I’m just saying you can’t run your grown sons’ lives, as much as you may still want to.”
Her eyes narrow as her mouth pinches tight. “Do you want to date her?”
“What?” I drop my hands from her shoulders.
“You heard me,” she repeats, crossing her arms defiantly. “I asked if you wanted to date her.”
I swallow, suddenly feeling way too overheated in this overly warm kitchen.
“No.” I raise my chin. “I don’t.” There, I said it.
And it’s mostly true. Sure, I wanted to date her when I first met her, but her well-aimed jabs at my character have hit their mark one too many times.
I have no intention of pursuing a woman who thinks I’m the scum of the earth.
Mom’s eyes narrow again as she picks up the breadbasket. “I still don’t like it. But I think you should bring her to dinner.”
“No, Mom—”
“Next week.” The look she levels me with leaves no room for rebuttal.
I mean, I could argue with her and refuse, but she’d just double down.
I wouldn’t put it past her to show up at my apartment on a random weeknight with dinner in tow just so she can weasel her way in and see what’s really going on for herself.
At least if I invite Daria on my own, I can prep her before she sacrifices herself on the altar of Alexandra Kent’s scrutiny.
“Fine. I’ll see if she wants to come to dinner next week.”
Mom gives a curt nod as if the matter is settled, then heads for the dining room table while I pinch the bridge of my nose and will my frustration away. Obviously Logan told her. And now she and Dad are likely writing me out of their will.
“Dinner’s ready,” Mom calls before whipping back toward me. “Dane, dish up the roast.”
I roll my eyes and do as she says, counting all the ways I’ll maim my older brother once I get him alone. In seconds, Dad and Logan shuffle into the kitchen and we’re all seated around the table. Parker’s empty spot glares back at us.
“My baby… married .” Mom covers her trembling mouth with both hands and shakes her head back and forth like Parker’s dead and not just on his honeymoon.
Logan scoffs. “He’ll be back home and back to family dinners with Jamie in tow soon enough.”
Mom huffs and glares at Logan. “Still. This is the first dinner he’s not been here in…” As soon as she purses her lips to mentally tally up exactly how many nights it’s been, Dad interjects.
“We know, hun. It’s been a long time.” Sending Logan and me a look that speaks too many threats to list, Dad adds, “And we’re all sad about him not being here tonight, aren’t we, boys?”
Logan’s lips thin. “Yeah.”
“Sure.” I clear my throat, ready to dig into this dinner that has me salivating over here. Who the heck cares that Parker’s not here when fresh bread is staring back at me?
Mom lets out a long-suffering sigh while rubbing her hand over the back of Parker’s usual chair. “Let’s say grace and pray he makes it home safe.”
I resist the urge to roll my eyes yet again when I bow my head. Dad prays, then we’re passing the bread around. “So, Dane,” Dad starts. “I hear you’ve got a new roommate.”
Logan’s body jerks with silent laughter, and I promise him retribution with my eyes. “Yeah, Dad. A friend of Jamie’s.” Maybe mentioning my new sister-in-law will earn me points with him, at least, since Mom’s a lost cause.
Dad takes a sip of his water, eyes trained on me. “And you didn’t think to ask how your mother would feel about this?”
I set my silverware down and lean back. “All right, come on now. This is getting ridiculous. She’s just a roommate.”
“Watch your tone, young man.” Dad’s hard stare and faux indignation endears him to Mom, sure, but I see the way his eyes keep shifting to her to make sure she’s placated.
He couldn’t care less that I have a female roommate, and we both know it.
But the man would die defending Alexandra Kent’s ideals.
I play his game and say, “Yes, sir. It’s just that there is nothing going on with me and Daria, so I didn’t feel the need to mention her.” I toss Logan a look of ill will before picking up my fork. “But it seems others felt differently.”
Logan’s mouth quirks on one side as he slathers a piece of warm bread with butter. The immature jerk.
“Hey, Mom.” I tilt my head her way. “Did Logan mention he’s going to start hitting the gym with me three days a week?”
Logan’s head snaps up. “Huh?”
Mom perks up, glancing between me and my older brother. “Oh?”
I smile, victory flooding my veins. “Yeah. Said he’s finally taking your advice to start exercising and taking care of himself so he can live to a ripe old age. Just like Tata.”
Mom beams at the mention of our late great-grandfather.
“Ah, Logan. Finally. You know, Tata lived to be a hundred. And his father before him. And since I will too, it’s only right for you to continue the tradition.
” She points her fork in his direction like he has any control whatsoever about how long his lifespan is.
“Actually, Mom, Dane is mistaken.” Logan tilts his head menacingly and widens his eyes. He sort of resembles one of those toy chickens you squeeze to get the eyes to bug out. “I’m too busy to go to the gym that often. Slammed with work.”
I shake my head. He’s lying. He knows it. I know it.
He just hates anything that requires being outside or being in public around people for any length of time.
And he especially hates working out in front of others.
He’s the most introverted introvert I know.
I couldn’t care less if the guy works out, but Mom being Mom, she’s hounded him for months about exercising for his health.
It’s true he’s gained some weight since high school, but he doesn’t seem to mind, so why should we?
But Mom claims that if Logan worked out, he’d feel better and go on more dates.
And since she tells us all the time that she wants hordes of grandchildren, I guess this is her way of trying to make that happen.
Which is completely contradictory to how she’s acting now that Parker is married and one step closer to the baby-making stage of his life.
Moms. Why are they so impossible to please?
“Well, I’ll come to you, then,” I say to my brother, just plain being a jerk now. But hey, why not? Logan forced me to endure a lovely little pre-dinner lecture from Mom, so now he’ll have to live with her disappointment if he turns down a personal workout sesh from yours truly.
“Yeah, we can work out together and have some nice brotherly bonding time,” I add.
“Wouldn’t want you to fall behind on your New Year’s resolution and all that.
” I slide a piece of potato in my mouth and put an end to his excuses.
The buttery goodness that is my mom’s cooking is a reminder of why I come to these dinners.
Even if my brothers are sometimes too ridiculous for their own good.
Logan’s shoulders lift on a deep inhale.
“Fine.” Without another word, he shovels a giant forkful of roast into his mouth.
Mom wiggles happily in her seat with a proud smile like she just got handed one of those giant-sized checks for a million dollars.
And Dad? Well, he looks like he’s been over this conversation since it started. That makes two of us, Dad.
I sigh and continue eating. Not only do I now have to invite Daria to the next family dinner, but I also roped myself into personally training the brother who’s currently looking at me like he’s planning out eight different ways to end me.
Alexandra Kent: 2.
Logan Kent: 1.
Dane Kent: 0.