16. Chapter 16 #2
Dane’s cheeks pink as he runs a hand through his still-damp hair. “Just be ready to leave in ten or fifteen minutes, okay?” He stalks off, mumbling something about ridiculous women, and I smile, knowing I’ve won this round.
I’ll gladly take those five extra minutes and cherish them like the hard-earned trophy they are.
“So what if we’re a few minutes late?” I say to my now grumpy driver, tapping my nails against the car door’s handrest. I’ve never been inside a car this nice—or clean—but the new car smell is giving me life right now. My beater that reeks of old cheese doesn’t even compare to this.
“I dislike being late.” Dane’s focus is trained on the road ahead of us. A light drizzle starts, prompting him to turn on the wipers.
“Yeah, well, I dislike olives, but I’m not going to throw a fit if your mom offers me some.”
His narrowed gaze swings to mine before going back to the road. “You dislike olives?” He scoffs. “Figures.”
I adjust my body to face Dane, blinking at the man’s audacity. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Olives are delicious. And good for you. The fact that you dislike them makes sense because you wouldn’t know what’s good for you if it bit that pert little nose of yours.”
My mouth drops open as shock whips through me. “You are awfully bold tonight, Charles .”
“Yeah, well.” His veiny hands tighten around the steering wheel. “Being late puts me in a mood.”
“Psh, clearly.” I roll my eyes and return to facing forward. This sure is a great way to start the night. As if dinner with his family isn’t bad enough, now his tightly wound self is coming undone at rapid fire speed all because I made him a few minutes late.
“You know what your problem is,” I say, feeling my own sudden surge of audacity.
“You need to lighten up and stop taking everything so seriously. Have fun. Go out and enjoy life. All you do is go to work, go to the gym, and sit at home reading.” I glare at the side of his head and toss up my hands. “What kind of life even is that?”
Dane’s jaw muscles flex, then tighten. “It’s uniform. Predictable. Perfectly fine.”
“Perfectly fine, huh?” I let my eyes wander the length of him.
“It’s interesting you say that now considering when we first met you’d mentioned how you were looking for a serious relationship.
” I tap my chin and pretend like it’s a chore to summon the memory.
In all reality, it’s way too easy to recall the night we flirted and very nearly became something more.
“Hmm, yeah, I think you even said something like, ‘Being a pilot isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. My schedule makes it hard to meet local girls and it can feel lonely at times.’ Yet here you are telling me your life is perfectly fine.”
“Daria.” He growls my name, his thinly held control seeming to snap a bit.
Chills race down my arms at the sound. “That’s not fair.
At all.” A beat of silence passes between us, and I begin to wonder if I’m being unfair.
But then he says, “You know, for someone who’s dead set on forgetting how well we connected that night, you sure do like to bring it up a lot. ”
Heat blazes across my face and neck, and I open my mouth to refute his claim, but he stops me by speaking first.
“If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you go back to that night in your mind more often than you like to admit, D.
And that would make sense with as angry as you were at me thinking I lied to you…
Maybe I’m not the lonely one. Maybe you’re so hurt by me not texting you back because you’re the lonely one in this scenario. ”
Again, my lips part, a retort heavy on my tongue, but I swallow it down when his accusation settles deep in my gut.
I’d like to pretend I’m not lonely, that I don’t need anyone in my life to feel complete.
But how can I deny his claim when I almost had a breakdown at finding out that Jamie was getting married and needed me to move out?
I’ve struggled with feelings of loss ever since those two became an official item, and as wrong as I know that is, it doesn’t stop me from being jealous of their relationship.
Tears build behind my eyes as I think about all that Dane has that I don’t—a family, siblings, parents who love him and provided for him growing up, his dream job, his own apartment.
He’s got everything I want and can’t seem to grab hold of.
A deep breath expels from Dane’s chest as he flicks on the blinker. “I’m sorry, that was harsh.”
I shrug and face the window, willing my tears not to fall.
I will never let this man see me cry. “It’s whatever.
” I force a derisive chuckle. “Let’s just get this night over with.
Pretend we can stand each other for more than five minutes, then go back to pretending that the other doesn’t exist when we get back home. ”
Get back home.
Those three words echo in my hollow chest like they were shouted across a canyon.
“If that’s what you want,” Dane says, his tone suspiciously even.
“Yup. It is.” I cross my arms and face forward again. He doesn’t need to know how his rashly spoken statement cut me so thoroughly, nor how I envy him for all that he has. Mostly for the one thing I know I’ll never attain—a home.
A place of peace and contentment, one where he feels loved and safe—like he belongs. Dane’s apartment isn’t that for me, can’t ever be that for me. But maybe someday at my new place, I’ll be able to create the dream I so desperately desire. Until then, I can smile and fake it.
What other choice do I have?