Chapter 21
GRAYSON
Bad idea
I’ll let you know when I decide
“Why’re you smiling at your phone?”
I didn’t hear Trevor bounce into the kitchen, but I catch the goofy expression on his face.
“I wasn’t smiling,” I reply, clearing my throat.
“Dude, yeah, you were. Don’t think I’ve ever seen you smile like that before. Not even when you’re on the mound. You know, while you’re striking out batters, destroying their confidence, and making them cry.”
I snort.
“Wow, you are in a good mood! Who’s the girl? Or guy? There’s no judgement here.”
Troy runs in after. “You got a girl, Gray?”
“No.”
He shrugs, grabs two bottles of water, a couple granola bars, and winks at us as he runs out. Kid’s only a sophomore, but he always has someone over.
“Sooo?” Trevor’s still waiting for an answer. “Alright,” he says, “this is probably none of my business, but I think it’s good if you met someone. I mean, you’ve definitely been less broody lately.”
“Broody?”
“Yeah, we love you anyway—no doubt about that—but you’re not scowling at us as much. You’re different, man. It’s not a bad thing. All I’m saying is your grumpy ass deserves to be happy, too.”
I arch an eyebrow.
“Look, you don’t have to give up her name,” he grins, “just tell me if I know her.”
“You might be right,” I smirk.
His smile widens in surprise. “I am?”
“Yeah, it is none of your business,” I state.
Trevor’s howl of laughter follows me out the kitchen. I’m scowling all the way to the basement. Don’t need anyone else accusing me of stupid shit.
The thought makes me pause. I’m not acting different—why would I be?
I’ll admit, knowing Alvarez is willing to help me without knowing the exact reason why, it’s admirable. But discovering she faced off with my father and didn’t back down? That’s on another level.
He keeps leaving voice messages warning I stay away from her. The fact she managed to get under his skin and pissed him off? That’s fucking impressive.
I clear my throat and wipe my expression clean.
My phone pings and it’s her. I don’t check it immediately. I don’t need to. This isn’t important. She’s not important. I can ignore her, not answer, and I’ll be fine. Unbothered.
My phone pings again.
If I check, it’s simply to find out if she’s about to cancel. That’s it.
Bad idea
I have two questions
first question: how was the cookie the other day?
Grayson Rhodes
Not bad.
That’s an understatement. It was fucking delicious. I’ve gone back every day to buy one. It has nothing to do with the fact she works there. Haven’t run into her yet though. Not that I want to, it’s a mere observation.
Bad idea
yay I’m glad! sorry I messed up your order the other day
She didn’t.
Grayson Rhodes
Where are you?
And why do I care?
Bad idea
team bus. on our way back to campus
The three dots appear and disappear a few times.
Grayson Rhodes
Ask your second question, Alvarez.
I look up the women’s soccer schedule. They played against Rose Mountain, about three hours away, and won 1-0.
Grayson Rhodes
I didn’t take you for the timid type.
As I hit send, I know that’s bullshit. She can be shy. I’ve seen it firsthand. Years ago. Haven’t allowed myself to think back to that night, but lately it’s getting harder and harder not to remember everything that occurred.
It was the first party of the semester thrown at Gibson Place.
Kind of like orientation, but with alcohol, weed, and the promise of sex.
I was drunk when she walked in. She was fucking gorgeous.
Smooth tan skin, brilliant green eyes, chocolate hair in loose waves, and dangerous curves everywhere I looked.
Who was she? I had no fucking clue, but I wanted to find out. I had to. I couldn’t look away.
She was the hottest girl I’d ever seen—my basest thoughts took over. With those tits and that sweet ass, her body was made for all sorts of fun. But it was the innocence in her eyes that did me in. I wanted to reach into the deepest part of her soul and beg her to share it with me.
Even though I never invite girls up to my room—still don’t—I willingly led her upstairs after some random asshole tried touching her. Should’ve kicked his ass, but Big Mike kept me from fighting him and probably getting arrested. I would’ve done the same for him. Besides, she was my sole focus.
I wanted her for myself—the way she looked at me was fucking addicting. Like I mattered. Like I was important. Like she would do anything I asked her to do. She didn’t know my name. My family. Didn’t know what sport I played. She was there for me. Just me. And I was high on that shit.
We were alone and all I wanted was to ravage her, devour her. To get lost in the dips and curves of her tempting body would be heaven.
Fuck, I wanted to do all sorts of things to this gorgeous girl. Stick my dick in all her holes until she was dripping with my cum from each one. Have her on her knees, begging to swallow my cock. Get her on all fours so I could smack that ass while I fucked it.
But then I kissed her. Her lips, her skin. She was the sweetest thing, absolutely fucking delicious. What would the rest of her taste like? I couldn’t wait to find out, to bury my face in her pussy and discover if it was as good or better. I’d bet better.
I kissed her again and again and she didn’t just let me, she kissed me back.
Like it was her life’s mission to suck on my tongue and nip at my lips.
Like she had no other purpose in this world but to cling to me with her small hands as she pressed her hot body to mine, grinding her hips into my own.
She wanted this, wanted me. Maybe as much I wanted her.
I took off her top and cupped her perfect tits, massaged them through the pink bra she wore.
Then, she fucked it all up.
“I’ve...I’ve never done this before,” she whispered, her voice soft, her expression bashful.
Fuck.
Fuck!
“You’re a virgin?”
A deep blush blossomed, coloring her cheeks and damn if she didn’t look prettier. But when she nodded, confirming she was as innocent as she looked, I couldn’t go through with it. Didn’t matter how much I wanted to.
I don’t fuck with virgins. Literally. Didn’t then and don’t now. They cannot be trusted. Too clingy, too much drama, always bordering on stalker-ish behavior. Fuck no.
But somehow, it was different with her. I considered being her first, but it couldn’t be anything other than one and done. She deserved better, deserved someone worthy of the gift she offered. That someone wasn’t me.
I had the most beautiful girl half naked on my bed, ready and willing, but I fought the desire threatening to consume me. I climbed off her and told her to get dressed and get out.
“Did…did I do something wrong?” she asked. Her eyes were glassy, on the verge of tears. She was about to cry.
“Lost interest,” I deigned to reply, shrugging with indifference before throwing a shirt on.
Her green gaze dropped to the huge hard-on still tenting my sweatpants. She chewed on her plump lower lip, a simple action so goddamn sexy, my resolved nearly wavered. I was this close to breaking my one rule.
Fortunately for me, she turned away. She didn’t say another word, but she moved slowly, as if waiting for me to change my mind.
I didn’t watch her dress because every time I looked at her, I wanted to apologize.
That hurt in her eyes, the disappointment, I put it there.
I had the strangest urge to wrap my arms around her and ask her to stay even if we didn’t have sex.
It was fucking weird and I hated her for making me feel this way.
I let her walk out of my room that night and I’ve kept her out of my mind over three fucking years. For the most part.
When I discovered she was Sammy’s sister, I didn’t panic.
I simply stayed away. If she was in my home, I wasn’t.
If she went out with my friends, I didn’t.
At home games, I ignored her. At parties, I would’ve left if she ever showed up, but she never did.
But now? Now, I’m standing in the hallway, waiting on my screen like a fucking loser for a text from her? Hell no.
Feeling irritated with myself, I silence my phone before I pocket it. When I get to the basement, she still hasn’t replied. Sammy and Big Mike are in the middle of a game of pool. Some of the other guys are taking bets on who’ll win.
I head up to the gym. As I reach the third floor, that’s when my phone vibrates.
I refuse to smile.
Bad idea
sorry. snack emergency. btw there’s nothing wrong with being the timid type
Grayson Rhodes
Snack emergency? Do I want to know?
It’s disturbing how much I do want to know.
Bad idea
probably not. so...I heard there’s a theme?
for the gamma party
I’m still wondering who has a snack emergency? How does a person have a snack emergency? Apparently she’s not going to elaborate and I’m not going to find out.
Instead, she wants to know more about the party this Friday, which is a surprise. I figured she’d cancel the first chance she got.
Alvarez has never liked me. That’s on me, of course.
I fucked up freshman year. Then, I messed up again sophomore year when it was clear she wanted to be friends.
Very likely once she found out her brother and I were teammates.
Lately, I’ve wondered if I should’ve handled the situation differently.
And yet, regardless of my behavior, she’s still willing to help me out.
She’s actually going to play along, just like I asked her to do.
Hell, she already gave my father a big fuck you after our last win.
In a voicemail he left this morning, my father revealed he warned her to stay away from me. Despite his threats, Alvarez still decided to jump into my arms. She would’ve done that for anyone, but the fact she wasn’t intimidated by my father and also chose to side with me? I’m fucking impressed.
Grayson Rhodes
Springtime in Paris.
Bad idea
the theme is ‘Springtime in Paris’? that’s it?
I can picture a frown making a rare appearance on her pretty face. No, not pretty. Regular. Average. There’s nothing especially exceptional about her face.
Grayson Rhodes
That’s it.
Bad idea
ok. want to meet there?
It’s definitely the smarter option. However, if we’re doing this, it has to be believable. And it will be, if we show up together.
Normally, I don’t play these games. I’m clear and direct with my intentions, which never extends beyond one night. However, it’s been years and Lila hasn’t moved on. Worse, she fucked with my friend.
When Alvarez and I were at Leo’s Burgers, I overheard people’s comments.
They wondered if she was my girlfriend. Lila must have overheard that as well and to my surprise, totally bought it.
If we arrive at the Gamma party together, I’m certain she’ll fuck off.
So long as she leaves Big Mike alone, I’ll be satisfied.
Bad idea
we just got back to campus. let me know when you decide
I don’t need time to decide. I know what I want.
Grayson Rhodes
We should go together. I’ll pick you up.
She replies immediately.
Bad idea
see you then!
Absurd as it is, I find myself smiling at my phone one more time.