10. Lettie
Lettie
I t felt like I had just fallen asleep when my alarm went off.
I tossed and turned all night with the anticipation of going on this trip for the rescue and being alone with Bailey for three consecutive days, causing my mind to race.
I didn’t pack anything last night since the majority of my clothes were still in duffel bags.
I grabbed one that I knew had my summer clothes, pulling some out to lighten the load since we wouldn’t be gone too long.
After getting dressed, I slung the bag over my shoulder and headed for the kitchen. Grabbing a banana off the counter, I turned to find my dad starting a pot of coffee.
“The sun’s not even up yet,” I said.
He grunted, pouring the ground beans into the top of the machine.
“You’d think after waking up at the crack of dawn for so long, you’d be a morning person at this point,” I mumbled.
He stabbed at a button on the machine before opening one of the cabinets and pulling two mugs out. One for him, and one for my mom, who I knew was still in bed.
“Don’t forget to send me updates. Bailey knows what horses to bid on, and I don’t want one more than what’s on that list.” He eyed me, his typical frown plastered to his face. “I mean it, Lettie.”
I rolled my eyes, peeling away at my banana. “Yeah, yeah. Only the horses you say. I’ve got it, Dad. You can trust me.”
He grunted again as Bailey’s truck lights lit up the driveway through the kitchen window as he pulled in next to the house. “That’s my cue. Love you, Dad.”
“Love you, too. Be safe.”
I tossed the remnants of my banana in the trash after taking a few bites and headed out the front door, making it down the porch steps as Bailey unlocked the dually. I opened the back door, tossing my bag in, then got in on the passenger side.
He opened the driver side door, the rising sun just barely illuminating the sky behind him. “Good morning,” he said as Rouge jumped in the truck, hopping into the back seat.
I reached back to scratch the top of his head. He was already panting, anxious for adventure.
“Morning. You gonna keep my dog forever?”
He closed his door. “Not my fault he likes me better.”
I scoffed. “He does not. ”
Bailey twisted in his seat to look back at Rouge. “Me, or Ms. Huckleberry-ass over here?”
“Hey!” I smacked him on the arm.
Rouge barked, coming to Bailey’s protection. I rolled my eyes at the grin on his face. “That means nothing.”
“Whatever you say, Huckleberry.”
I was glad the mood was lighter than how we left things yesterday.
When I left Bell Buckle, everything I did around the ranch and the rescue was pushed off onto someone else.
Bailey took care of Rouge and Red, adding them to his already overflowing plate.
Any chores I used to do were shoved off to Brandy and various volunteers.
I felt guilty for abandoning them. The more I thought about it, the more it sunk in. My brothers didn’t leave, Brandy and Bailey didn’t leave, and they were all doing better than I was.
Bailey started the truck, letting it warm up for a minute before heading out. I felt the truck jolt with every bump the trailer hit on the dirt road. Thankfully, once we hit pavement, it smoothed out. Bailey turned on a country playlist on his phone, Colter Wall’s deep voice filling the cab.
After thirty minutes on the road, Rouge finally stopped pacing in the back seat and laid down, his panting quieting as he fell asleep stretched out.
I stared out the window, laying my head against the headrest as Bailey drove silently.
The only sound in the cab was the music and the faint hum of the tires.
** *
I woke up to Bailey putting the truck in park and lifted my head off the window where my forehead had been resting to take in our surroundings. We were parked at a gas station, the pumps full of tourists and truck drivers.
“I’m going to check the trailer and let Rouge out to pee,” Bailey said.
“I’m going to use the restroom, if that’s alright.”
He nodded and grabbed Rouge’s leash as he got out.
He opened the back and attached it to the dog’s collar.
As soon as his paws hit the ground, he was tugging at Bailey.
He was used to running free and hated being tethered to a person by a six foot rope.
I couldn’t blame him. Sometimes, I felt like I was on a tight leash with my family too.
“Call me if you need me,” Bailey said before closing the door.
I grabbed the handle and got out. My body felt stiff from my nap, my legs already aching. Despite the extra bit of sleep, I still felt exhausted. I headed inside the gas station, finding the restrooms tucked in the back corner.
After relieving myself, I wandered the aisles for a specific item, my eyes lighting up when I found it. I grabbed the bag and headed to the counter to check out. Walking back to the truck, I found Bailey loading Rouge up and unhooking the leash. I got in the passenger side and buckled myself in.
“Looks like there’s a thunderstorm up ahead that we’re going to hit. Shouldn’t be too bad, though,” he stated as he started the truck.
Looking at the dash, I saw I’d been asleep for three hours. That meant we were halfway to Montana. It wasn’t uncommon for summer thunderstorms in the west, but hopefully, Bailey was right in that it’d be light. Driving a trailer in a storm could be dangerous, depending on the conditions.
“It’s a good thing we left early then.”
He nodded as he turned up the music, “Fast Hand” by Cody Jinks coming through the speakers. Rouge barked as we pulled back out on the highway, a protest to being stuck in the vehicle. I twisted in my seat to scratch behind his ear. “I know, bud. We’ll be there soon.”
He stared out the window, watching as cars passed us. I faced forward again, pulling the snack I bought from the gas station out of the pocket in the door. Bailey heard the crinkle, briefly glancing over at it.
A smile reached the corners of his mouth. “Sunflower seeds.”
I opened the bag, holding it out to him. He stuck his hand in and grabbed a fistful, tossing his head back as he popped them in his mouth. I set the bag in my lap, staring down at the seeds. “Remember when we used to shove our cheeks full of them as kids, see how many we could fit?”
He chuckled before grabbing the empty water bottle from the cupholder, twisting the cap off and spitting a shell in the hole. “I remember you stuffed so many in your cheeks you almost choked to death.”
I laughed, grabbing a few from the bag and dropping them in my mouth. “But I won.”
“It was disgusting that we counted them afterward, saliva and all.”
I grabbed the open water bottle, spitting a cracked shell in. “It was so gross.”
He was grinning from ear to ear, one hand on the wheel, the other arm leaning on the center console as his eyes stayed focused on the road. “And you tried to plant them.”
“I watered them every day and they never grew.”
“No shit they didn’t. They were shells.”
“I was a kid! I didn’t know.”
“Callan and I didn’t want to spoil your fun so we never told you.”
He grabbed the bottle again, bringing it to his lips.
“You guys probably made fun of me behind my back.”
He laughed again, handing the bottle back to me. “Oh, we definitely did.”
Raindrops landed on the windshield, quickly turning into a downpour. With the land so flat in this area, I could see lightning in the distance, miles in front of us.
I reached forward to turn down the music after finishing off the last of the sunflower seeds in my cheek. I rolled the top of the bag and shoved it back in the pocket of my door.
Anxiety crept in as we drove further into the storm, my palms getting clammy.
When I was thirteen, there’d been one of the biggest storms we’d seen pass by.
Through all the chaos of the high winds and downpour of rain, lightning had hit the tree directly outside my bedroom window.
I screamed so loud, the entire house woke up.
They’d all stormed into my room to find the tree on fire through the window.
I’d ran outside with my brothers and dad wearing my flannel pajamas when Bailey and his dad sped into our driveway, having seen the fire from their house.
One look at me and Bailey could tell I was terrified.
While his dad helped the guys put out the fire in the storm, Bailey had held me to his chest in the driveway, rubbing circles on my back.
I never would have thought the tree could have lit up so fast with all the rain, but the flames were relentless.
Thankfully, there was no damage to the house, and soon after, the fire department showed up to help battle the fire.
The entire time, I could tell Bailey wanted to help, but he’d stayed right with me.
I wiped my hands on my denim-clad thighs, trying to wipe the memory away. Bailey caught the movement from the corner of his eye, and I knew he was thinking of the same night.
“Forgot you hate thunderstorms,” he said.
I turned to check on Rouge behind my seat to find him sleeping. He wasn’t a fan of storms either, but at least he could sleep through them. I was thankful for the little bit of sleep I got earlier because until we got out of this weather, I wouldn’t be able to relax.
I faced forward in time to see lightning strike the open field out the passenger window. I flinched as thunder rolled around us.
“Look at me. ”
My hands fisted on my seatbelt, holding onto it as I looked at Bailey. His green eyes landed on me before turning back to the road. “We’re going to be okay. It’s just a little rain.”
As if the sky heard him, another lightning strike hit. The light illuminated the cab, and seconds later, thunder boomed. The rain pelted the windshield and Bailey turned up the speed of the wipers, their efforts doing little against the battering of rain.
I took a deep breath, attempting to calm my nerves.
I leaned the back of my head against the headrest, clamping my eyes shut.
I knew we’d be okay, but that didn’t stop my fear from taking over.
I probably looked pathetic sitting here while the storm did nothing to jar Bailey, even driving the trailer through this.
I admired his ability to keep calm in stressful situations.
When I was ten and he was fourteen, I twisted my ankle trying to balance on rocks to cross the creek on my parents’ property.
Reed had freaked, running back to the house to get my dad.
Bailey stayed with me on the shore of the creek bed, talking to me about the new rescues my dad had brought in.
We’d sat there, my ankle elevated in his lap, and named each horse.
He’d distracted me from the pain effortlessly.
That’s just who Bailey was.
I hated the feelings that came up with the memories of us growing up. No amount of time away could keep those at bay.
“I bought the twenty acres next to my parents’ ranch so we can grow more hay.”
I gnawed on my cheek, the nervous tick doing little to ease me. “Really?”
“Yep. Bought it shortly after you left for college. We’ve upped our profit. Any bales not going to Lennon’s store go to our horses and Bottom of the Buckle. Saves a hell of a lot on feed.”
“That’s really good.”
“I heard that property next to your dad’s might be up for sale soon. Billy passed away about a year ago and his kids have been trying to figure out what to do with it.”
“Let me guess - you want to buy that one, too.”
“I’ve thought about it. If I did, we could expand the rescue and have more space to take in more horses.”
“My dad would like that. He’s stretched thin on space. I can’t believe he’s seriously limiting how many horses we bring back.”
Bailey chuckled. “Can’t bring back a whole trailer full of ‘em if we don’t have the space, Huckleberry. You can’t save them all, as much as we all want to.”
“If we had more space, we could damn sure try,” I said.
“You trying to convince me to buy Billy’s land?”
I looked over at him. “Don’t you want to save as many as you can?”
“Of course I do. I’d also like to get out of my parents’ in-law unit. As convenient as it is living on their property, I need a place of my own.”
I nodded, tapping my finger on the outside of my thigh.
“Reed won’t ever leave my parents’ ranch. ”
“You think?” He must’ve seen my anxious tapping because he reached over and set his hand on mine, his fingers resting on my thigh. My hand froze as all of my awareness focused on his touch.
“I mean, why would he? Cheap rent, and all his work is close.”
“Yeah, maybe. I think he’s hoping he can take over the ranch someday. Horseshoeing is hard on the body as you get older.”
A breathy laugh escaped my lips. “He is getting a bit of a hunchback, huh?”
Bailey chuckled. “That’s exactly why I didn’t go into that field.”
“Oh? Not because you have a million other things on your plate?”
He slowly slid his hand away from mine. “Had to keep my mind busy these past few years.”
No doubt because of me. There was that guilt creeping in again.
He was silent for a moment before he spoke again. “Lettie.”
“Yeah?”
“You can open your eyes now.”
I hadn’t even realized they were still clamped shut.
I looked out the windshield to see the rain had slowed to a light trickle.
I was so lost in his voice that I didn’t notice when the sound of the wipers slowed and the thunder stopped.
I brought my gaze to him and saw a faint rainbow painting the cloudy sky out his driver side window.
He glanced at me. “I’d save every single one of them if I could.”
I studied him as he drove, his eyes not straying from the road in front of him for a while after our conversation.
His cowboy hat was sitting on the dash against the windshield.
His hair was messy but his jaw was free of the stubble that was there yesterday.
He must’ve shaved this morning, but I knew by the end of our trip, his usual five o’clock shadow would be back.
Damn him and his big heart and his jawline and his hair and every word he spoke that made me forget every reservation I had when it came to the possibility of me and him.
We were barely a few hours into our trip and I was already falling back into old routines.