Chapter 23 Kai
Kai
Who the fuck is this woman? The Haven I knew would never have done this. She was always the one being hurt, not the one doing the hurting. But the woman holding that gun isn’t the same girl anymore.
She’s darker. Fiercer.
Someone I—we—created with our cruelty.
She’s confirmed what we both hoped wasn’t true. That the gun’s loaded and she knows how to pull the fucking trigger.
Man, what the hell is wrong with me? Do I have a fucking death wish or something? Haven’s serious about me leaving. I’ve seen her contemplating serious shit before, and she’s got that same stubborn determination on her face.
I should just do what she wants.
But I can’t help myself. Instead of obeying, I just keep pushing back.
Because I know what will happen when I’m gone.
The way Haven stares at Rooke makes my fucking skin crawl and my teeth ache. Why does she look at him like that? Because she likes it when he gives her attention? A rescue dog would scratch that same itch, and it wouldn’t expect her to fuck it in return.
I won’t let him touch her. Can’t even bear the thought of them fucking again. Once was enough. Those memories are branded into my fucking brain.
“Just put the gun down, and we can leave,” I tell her, lifting my hands, showing her just how calm and reasonable I’m being.
She laughs. “I’m not going anywhere.” The gun trains on my chest, like she knows she’ll hit her mark with a broader target. “And neither are you. You had your chance, and you blew it.”
There’s a glimmer in her blue eyes. Pain. Betrayal. She’s not just talking about right now, when I could have—fucking should have—left.
She begged me to take her v-card under that maple tree, but I pussied out.
Why?
Because people would talk. Both our reputations would be destroyed…and she didn’t even have one yet. I was doing her a favor by saying no, but she thought it was a diss.
Is that why it took Rooke holding a gun on us last night before she finally let me fuck her?
The gun swings away from me, toward Rooke. And of course the sadistic cunt is enjoying every second of this. Probably has a hard on, watching Haven try to take charge like this.
“You two had so much fun ordering me around last night,” Haven says. “Makes me want to see what all the fuss is about.”
I smile when Rooke’s marble-like face twitches with confusion. But then her words sink in, and it’s my turn to stare at her with dread.
“Jesus, Haven, what the fuck are you—”
I cut off when the gun trains on me again. “Quiet, boy,” she stage-whispers. “I’ll let you know when you can speak.”
Jesus fucking Christ.
I start shaking my head. “No. No, Haven. Whatever the fuck you think is going to happen—”
The gun moves down to my knee. “We never really got a chance to talk,” she says quietly, eyes briefly unfocused. “Do you still play sports? A shot to your kneecap wouldn’t be fatal. But I’m sure it’ll be devastating for your career. Months, if not years of physical therapy.”
“You’ve made your point, Haven,” Rooke murmurs patiently, almost kindly. Condescending fuck. “Now why don’t you—“
“Uh-uh!” She tsks, pointing the gun at Rooke. “I’d stay quiet too, if I were you. You’ll be getting the better end of this deal, Professor. If you cooperate.”
I don’t want to look at him, but for some reason I do. And when I see the flicker of a smile on his mouth, I know I’m royally fucked.
Definitely should have left when I had the chance.
She points the gun at Rooke’s crotch, and despite his calm exterior, he still flinches. Jesus, any guy would.
“Kai needs to figure some stuff out before he leaves,” Haven says, the gun still pointed at Rooke, but her eyes on me now.
Her eyes jump back to Rooke. “Couch. Now.” She gestures with the gun.
There’s something between a sneer and a smile playing out on her lips. She’s enjoying this way too fucking much…but can I even fucking blame her? She might have been rolling last night, but that doesn’t mean she wasn’t there.
“Hell hath no fury,” Rooke says.
“Damn fucking straight.” Haven gestures at the couch. “Move it!”
Rooke slowly makes his way over to the sofa facing the fireplace. “Do you want me to sit down?”
“Obviously.” She points with her chin. “Right in the middle.”
With her attention on him, I slowly reach for the door and try to turn the lock. But before I can turn it, the gun swings back to me.
“Jesus!” Fuck, I wish she’d put that safety back on. My nerves are fucking fried.
“Your turn, Kai.” Her voice is so fucking sweet, I shiver.
I roll my lips together as I slowly head for the couch, hands still raised. If there’s one thing I know about someone riding a power trip, it’s to keep them happy until they tire of you, or you get a chance to run.
I’ve had nearly two decades of experience with Ezra.
Fuck.
Is my brother okay? Did I kill him?
I shove the thought out of my mind before it can fester in there. Worrying about shit like that won’t help me right now.
“Keep going,” Haven coos.
My jaw locks. But Haven steps forward, her aim becoming more accurate with every step she takes as she moves to the back of the sofa.
Rooke takes a seat, head turned to watch me a few feet away.
He glances over the back of the couch at Haven, and if the rain hadn’t been drumming on the roof, it would have been quiet enough to hear a pin drop on the thick rug under my feet.
She uses the gun to gesture to the sofa. “Keep going.”
I swallow, and shuffle forward.
“Little closer.”
I’m already way too close to Rooke. “What the fuck do you want?”
Her smile is chilling in its radiance. “I know what makes you tick, Kai. I know what makes you break.”
My stomach sinks like I drank cement. I shake my head, speechless, but her smile just inches up even more.
She steps closer to the back of the couch, reaches down with her free hand, and slides her fingers into Rooke’s hair.
Slowly, she aims the gun into his lap, gesturing. “See that cock down there?”
I reel away, the back of my legs slamming into the coffee table. My hand shoots out as I fight for balance, my jaw locked tight. Still shaking my head. Right until my back hits the wall beside the fireplace.
“You’re going to suck it until he comes and then maybe, maybe, I’ll let you leave.”
Exactly what I told her in the library.
How could I forget? Haven holds a grudge like a sponge holds water.
Rooke flinches as she twists her hand in his hair. When he turns to glance up at her, she ducks down and presses her mouth to his.
The plan is simple.
They’re distracted. She isn’t even pointing the gun at me anymore. I can make it to the door before she even notices. I’ll be out of here and…
Rooke can do whatever he wants to her.
And judging from the way he’s kissing her back, saying he’s going to fuck her in the ass wasn’t an idle threat. This guy’s pain threshold must be god tier, because he doesn’t seem to care about his split lip as their mouths clash.
I can’t stand watching this.
I don’t dare leave her with him.
Change of plans.
I lunge forward, aiming for Haven’s wrist so I can wrench the gun free and get the upper hand.
But I swear they’re communicating on a psychic level or something, because the instant I’m in reach, Rooke’s hand claps over my throat. And then the gun is at my temple, muzzle digging into that divot of soft flesh.
Rooke’s fingers dig into my neck as he tsks me. “Should have made a run for it, boy.” He slides a hand behind his sweatpants and pulls out his cock.
She slides the gun along my skull until the muzzle is right at my hairline, then pushes hard, forcing me down. I glare at her, but she just nods encouragingly the lower my head moves.
“That’s it, Kai,” she whispers. “Now open your mouth and swallow him down.”
Rage and shame seethes under my skin, making my face glow. But her finger is still on that fucking trigger.
Rooke’s hand moves to the back of my neck. He grips me tight enough to make me wince in pain.
“You’ll have to get it hard first,” he murmurs.
There’s a sadistic gleam in his eyes, satisfaction flooding his face a moment later when the fight leaves my body.
Should have fucking left.
Why the hell did I keep hesitating?
When I don’t move, Rooke keeps me in place with one hand, the other grabbing my arm, sliding down to my wrist, manipulating my fingers around his already-stiffening cock.
I squeeze my eyes closed, because I can’t stand looking at him.
Or her.
She’s enjoying this just as much as he is, the fucking psycho.
“Don’t make that face,” she taunts. “You love this, you fucking slut.”
Jesus, I wish she’d stop throwing my words back at me. But I guess I know where this is coming from now. Shouldn’t be surprised she’s holding a grudge. Haven always got pissy when things didn’t go her way.
My eyes flick to the gun in her hand. The barrel looks like a fucking tunnel leading straight to hell.
“No.” The word escapes before I can stop it. I press my lips together, tasting blood where I’ve bitten the inside of my cheek. “I won’t—I can’t—“
The cold circle of the muzzle presses against my temple, making my stomach drop through the floor.
“Try harder, Kai.” Haven’s voice is pure venom.
Rebellion and survival instinct war inside me. For a split second, I consider knocking away the gun. Consider if dying would be better than this.
But then I catch the look in Rooke’s eyes—that clinical curiosity, like he’s taking notes on exactly how far Haven has to push until I break.
I refuse to give either of them the satisfaction.
But then Rooke licks the cut on his lip, and a flash of last night hits me—
Me, kissing Rooke as he jerked me off like he knew my dick better than I did. The way I panted against his mouth, desperate and needy. The way Haven moaned as she watched, the touch of her foot against my back when she’d pushed the two of us together, begging for more.
…this girl’s as innocent as you are…
Not anymore, she isn’t.
And neither am I.
The thought makes bile rise in my throat even as I try to rationalize it.
Fuck this.