Chapter Sixteen
Universe Speaking
Carter
The only other time my heart beat this fast and hard was in a playoff game.
When everything was on the line, when every second counted, when I had no choice but to perform at my highest level — that was the only thing I had to compare this feeling to.
I felt that same adrenaline pumping through me as Livia led me through the house, her hand wrapped around mine, the perfect curves of her ass and the gorgeous muscles of her back guiding me.
We passed by plenty of sexual scenes that should have had my head turning. It seemed as the night progressed, the crowd surrendered more and more to their kinks. No one was shy or bashful anymore. Everyone was giving in to their deepest, darkest desires — or watching someone submit to theirs.
But none of it was alluring enough for me to take my eyes off Livia.
I studied every lean slope and smooth patch of skin on her body, marveling at the fact that she was holding onto my hand proudly as she dragged me through the house.
She’d told that other patron that she couldn’t touch me. She’d practically fucking growled, had climbed into my lap like I was her property.
And I wanted to be.
God, I’d never wanted anything so fiercely in my life — not even the Cup.
I was turned on, yes. That was a fucking no-brainer. She’d already made me come once tonight, and the fact that we were on our way to a private room told me the night wasn’t close to over.
But it wasn’t that simple fact that made me want to let her own me in every way a man can be possessed.
It was that she saw me.
She fucking saw me, the real me, the version of me at his most vulnerable, and she didn’t laugh. She didn’t tease me. She… she fucking heard every word I couldn’t even say.
She brought me here tonight to please me, but she also brought me to show me something not even my therapist could help me grasp.
That it was okay to fail.
That there was no shame in trying.
That there were no consequences for voicing what I wanted.
Right now, my brain was too hardwired on the way her body looked wrapped in lace to think too hard about what this night would unlock for me, but I knew it without even fully understanding it.
I could feel it, like a puzzle piece snapping into place in the depths of my being.
She’d healed a part of me tonight.
We wandered through the mansion and upstairs, twisting through dark hallways until Livia pushed through a large wooden door to an empty bedroom. She locked it behind us, releasing my hand to take in the scene.
The air was warm, heat spilling from a sleek, modern fireplace built into the far wall, its flames throwing soft, amber light across everything it touched. In that glow, the king-size bed dominated the center — draped in rich black sheets with a headboard padded in deep charcoal leather.
A play swing hung from a thick beam near the corner, the straps black and gleaming. Beside it sat a low, cushioned bench made of dark wood.
Against one wall, glass shelves displayed toys like an art installation.
Polished metal, glossy silicone, braided leather — all shapes and sizes, some I recognized, and plenty I didn’t.
Their reflections winked in the firelight like they knew secrets I didn’t yet, like they couldn’t wait to be in on what we were about to do.
The whole space smelled faintly of leather and clean linen, with the faintest trace of spiced vanilla — which I knew was all Liv. I’d smelled it on her the first night in her condo, that warm and inviting scent. It was like a warm sugar cookie and a shot of bourbon.
I let out a low whistle as I turned to face Livia, sliding my hands into my pockets. “This looks like a room out of a Bond movie.”
“Young. Livia Young.”
I smirked. “Nice.”
“This is our room for the night,” she said.
“It’s completely private. No one is watching.
” She took calculated steps toward me with every word, her heels clicking on the marble until they hit the fur rug under my feet.
“I can still taste your desperation from earlier… and I’m not done with you yet. ”
I swallowed, cock instantly growing hard beneath my slacks.
“You’ve been so good, listened so well… I want to reward you.” She trailed her long fingernail down my chest, her heated eyes locked on mine before she dug the nail into the flesh enough to make me hiss. “But I want to use you first. And I want you begging for me.”
She leaned in, swiftly kissing me and taking my bottom lip between her teeth.
I cursed as she bit down hard, but then she released me with a grin and my body was surging to life, already silently pleading for more.
“Take your clothes off,” she commanded, gracefully taking a seat on the bench. “Slowly. I want to see what I get to play with.”
Instantly, my hands moved to my jacket, unfastening the buttons at my waist before I shrugged it off and tossed it on the bed. I was already starting on my dress shirt when Livia leaned back on her palms and crossed her legs with a wide grin.
“So eager,” she teased. “So desperate for me, aren’t you?”
“Always,” I panted, unfastening my belt next.
“You’re pathetic.”
I stilled, heart kicking hard in my chest at the word.
Instantly, Livia leaned forward. “Safe word check.”
“High stick for stop, offside if I want to keep going but need to slow way down.”
“Or if something went too far,” she reminded me, her eyes sincere as they watched. “Do you need to use one now?”
I blinked, trying to sort through the emotions swirling through me. I was so fucking turned on, so ready for whatever she was about to do to me, but I was also triggered by that word.
But somehow… not in the same way I was used to.
It made me feel that familiar wash of shame, the heat behind my cheeks, but it also sent tingles through me. It had me vibrating and almost wanting… more?
I shook my head. “I… no, I don’t think so.”
“Good. Then listen to me carefully, Carter. When I call you pathetic, or desperate, or anything else tonight… it’s not to cut you down. I’m not him. I’m not trying to make you smaller so I can feel bigger.”
She rose from the bench, every step toward me slow and intentional until she was right in front of me, tilting her chin up so her eyes locked with mine.
“I say it because you want me to. Because it flips a switch in you when it comes from me. Here, you’re in control of what I call you.
Here, you can stop me with a single word.
And when you don’t? That means you’re letting me own you in a way that’s safe, in a way that feeds you instead of starves you. ”
Her hands slid up my chest, hooking my open shirt until I let her strip it off my arms. She threw it to join my jacket on the bed.
“When he said things like that, it was about breaking you. When I say them, it’s about building you into something that turns us both on.”
She smirked again, heat returning to her gaze.
“So, I’ll ask again, pretty boy — are you still eager for me?”
I wet my lips, nodding. “Yes.”
“Do you want to pull your cock out for me?”
“Yes,” I groaned, already doing what she asked. My pants and briefs were gone in a flash, and when she dropped her gaze to watch me fist myself, I moaned.
“Is that the best you can do?” she asked, and the bite in her tone sent a zip of electricity through me. “God, I’m already bored.”
I stroked my cock with my eyelids fluttering at the feel of it. “Tell me what to do.”
“Always needing to be told. You’re lucky I waste my time on you.”
“I am. I’m so lucky.”
What the actual fuck was happening?
She was right. Every word she said to me should have stung, but it lit me up, instead. Because I knew it was for her pleasure — and for mine.
“See that bench?” she asked, nodding toward where she’d just been seated. “Bend over it. Hands on the cushion. Spread your legs.”
That had my eyes shooting open. “Uh…”
When Livia arched a brow in warning, I did my best to surrender and do as she told — but my heart was racing again, every nerve in my body on high alert.
I got in position — bent over, hands on the bench — and Livia took her time walking over to stand behind me. She smoothed a hand over my back with an appreciative moan.
“You do look so pretty like this.”
Her heel tapped the inside of each of my ankles.
“Wider, Rook. Open for me. Let me see you.”
I swallowed, doing as she said as my cock began to drip. I was so fucking turned on it almost hurt.
Livia hummed with approval again, and then her hands were on me, massaging my lower back, my ass, my thighs. Every touch was sensual and slow, purposeful. She was edging me, her hands coming so close to my balls that I felt the gentle brush of a knuckle or nail, but then she’d move away innocently.
“Fuck, Liv. I want you to touch me.”
“Of course you do. But I get to have my way with you first.”
She took away her touch completely then, and I groaned at the loss as I watched her cross to the wall of toys. She trailed her nail along the glass before carefully selecting something and making her way back to where I was bent over with a knowing smile.
An anal plug.
Fuck.
I expected to be scared. If I were afraid of judgment from her or from the guys or from anyone else, I would have stood immediately and shook my head. I would have thrown my hands up and said, “Absolutely not. High stick.”
But there were no judges here.
I was safe to explore my desires, and if I was being honest with myself…
I was curious.
I wanted to play.
“Mmm… someone’s excited,” she mused, holding the plug up for me to see more clearly. It wasn’t intimidating, just a small, shiny, silver plug. “Do you know what this is?”
I nodded.
Livia traced my spine with the cool metal, dragging it over one ass cheek and up the next before she stood next to me, so I had no choice but to look up at her.