Chapter 19 #2
God, what am I doing here? I nervously walk over.
He is dressed in a grey suit, white shirt and grey tie, and his tall stature dominates the space around him.
His longish dark hair hangs just above his collar and has a curl to it and he is wearing a long five o’clock shadow.
His piercing dark eyes penetrate mine. He brings the term Greek god into a new stratosphere. Fuck!
He smiles warmly and holds out his hand to shake mine.
I smile, take it and am immediately jolted by a strong charge of sexual energy.
Oh, he’d be good alright. I feel myself harden, and my eyes drop immediately to try and hide my arousal.
He smirks and keeping hold of my hand, he lifts it up and tenderly kisses the back of it.
“Hello,” he smiles with my hand still in his.
“Hello,” I smile as I nervously pull my hand from his grip.
The intensity of this guy is off the hook.
He holds out his hand to the table. “Take a seat,” he smiles.
I sit at the table for two towards the back of the restaurant. It is adorned with six flickering candles at all different heights. The crowd is eclectic, and the music is earthy. The restaurant is quite dark and the candles on all of the tables add to the ambience.
“Would you like to order some drinks?” the waitress asks.
My eyes flick to Nicholas whose eyes are firmly on me. He smiles affectionately and I blow out a breath and read the drink menu. Right.
“I’ll have a Martini, please.” I look at Nicholas.
‘I’ll have the same.” He smiles at the waitress and then back at me.
She leaves us alone. I don’t think I have ever been so nervous, why does he make me feel like this?
“I don’t like being ambushed into dates with people,” I say dryly as I pretend to read the menu.
He nods. “I don’t like having to ambush you to see me either.”
“So why do it then?”
He smiles. “Because I wanted to see you and I knew it was the only way I could get you here.”
“Ok, you have seen me, what now?” I raise my eyebrows in question as I look at him blankly.
He smiles broadly. “Are you always such a charming date?” I smile in embarrassment. “No, you are getting the deluxe package.” He smiles and picks up the menu.
“I see. How have you been?” he asks.
“Okay. You?”
“I’m good. Our last meeting has left me a little confused though.” His eyes search mine.
I frown. Let’s just get right into it then. “Why?” I ask trying to feign nonchalance.
“Because I had the best night I had had in years and then you walked me out to the car remember.”
I look down nervously as my heart rate picks up. “Yes, I remember.” I rearrange the napkin on the table.
“You kissed me.” His gaze penetrates mine. My eyes rise to meet his. “Yes,” I whisper.
“It was insane.” He bites his bottom lip as he looks at me. “Off the charts. I know you felt it too.”
My eyes flick around the room in uncomfortable tension. “Look, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have kissed you. I…” I shrug my shoulders as words escape me.
He smiles sexily. “Don’t apologize, I’m not complaining.” My eyes meet his. “What are you doing then?”
“Here you are.” The waitress puts our two drinks on the table.
“Thank you,” I smile. My eyes flick back to the ridiculously hot, intelligent man across the table from me.
“I want to know why you never returned any of my calls,” he asks.
I look around the restaurant in annoyance.
I don’t need this shit. “I’m sorry if you don’t get brushed off often but I am not after anything and I don’t fuck around so…
” I shake my head as I try to articulate my thoughts.
“What’s the point? You live in France remember.
Besides it was six months ago, why are you bringing this up now?
” He puts his hand across the table and grabs mine, and I swallow as I look at our entwined hands.
“I’m bringing this up because the thought of you has been haunting me for six months and I want to know have ever thought of me?”
My eyes meet his. “Maybe,” I answer quietly.
“It’s a yes or no answer,” he says dryly.
“Yes,” I reply as I look at him again.
He squeezes my hand. “What have you thought?”
I swallow nervously and shrug my shoulders. “I wondered what would have happened if I called you.”
He smiles a broad smile at me and raises his eyebrows. “You did?” he whispers. “So, what did you think would have happened between us?”
I shrug. “It probably wouldn’t have gone anywhere to be honest. I’m not into the whole casual sex thing and I’m guessing someone who looks like you is.” I smile.
He licks his lips as he smirks. “To be honest most men do throw themselves at my feet and I feel nothing, not interested at all and then you come along with your masculinity, intelligence and don’t give a fuck attitude and throw me completely off balance and yet you want nothing to do with me. It’s…frustrating.”
I laugh. “Is that how I come across? Masculine, intelligent and don’t give a fuck?”
He takes a sip of his drink and nods. It is then I notice that he is still holding my hand across the table. I immediately pull out of his grasp.
He smiles and looks at his outstretched arm on the table and pulls it back slowly. “You are different to most men I have met, Adrian.”
I raise an eyebrow. “How so?”
“You’re very masculine and yet have an inner gentle quality.
You’re intensely sexual and yet you don’t sleep around, even though you are one of the best-looking men I have ever met.
Your two best friends are straight and yet you are entirely comfortable being gay.
You’re very intelligent and portray strength as you run the company and look after your two best friends, but it makes me wonder.
When all is done and dusted, who looks after you, Adrian?
Who satisfies you sexually…emotionally? Who loves you when you come home from work each night? ” His eyes darken and drop to my lips.
I sit back affronted and look at him in horror. Who says that on a first date?
“That’s very deep.” I stammer. “You got all that info on me from dinner six months ago?”
He smiles into his drink. “Perks to being a psychologist.”
I smile as I drain my glass. “My best friend is in love with a psychologist and he reckons it’s the biggest mind fuck in history.”
“Is that Joshua?” I nod and smile. “Is he back with Natasha?” he asks.
“No, but hopefully they will work it out.”
“You have an affection for Natasha?”
I smile. “I adore her. Joshua’s life is crazy, super rich, and yet Natasha is this beautiful pure soul who has loved him since they were kids. They are first cousins and have fought this attraction since they were teenagers. I don’t know two people more in love.”
He raises his eyebrows. “Wow.” He smiles as our meal arrives. “Have you ever been in love Adrian?”
I swallow nervously. “I thought I was once.”
He smiles wistfully and takes a mouthful of food. “Do tell.”
I shrug my shoulders. “It’s quite pathetic when I say it out loud really.
I entered my first relationship when I was fifteen and we were together six years.
We were madly in love and I wanted to come out, but he didn’t.
I couldn’t live my life pretending I was someone that I wasn’t, that he was just my roommate.
My parents knew about us so I thought it would be ok but, in the end, it wasn’t, he freaked out and ran.
He even hooked up with a girl to prove to the world he was straight.
I will never forget the night he came to me crying, to tell me that she was pregnant and that he was going to marry her.
” My gut twists at the memory and I take a large gulp of my drink.
“And now I have the honor of every time he gets drunk, him calling me and telling me how much he loves me and misses me and that he made the biggest mistake of his life and yet he can do nothing about it because he is now a father of three.” I look around the room in annoyance that he got me to say that out loud.
“So, when you ask me have I ever been in love, I tell you if that’s love I want nothing to do with it ever again. ”
He looks at me affectionately and grabs my hand over the
table again and I squeeze it in a thankful gesture. I can’t believe I just told him that, I have never told anyone other than Josh and Cam.
“I see.” He nods.
“You?” I ask. Trying to take the spotlight off myself.
He nods and takes a sip of his drink. “I was married,” he says quietly.
Oh shit, that’s right. My stomach drops.
“What happened?” I ask quietly, already knowing the horrible answer.
“He died eight years ago in a snow skiing accident,” he says sadly.
I squeeze his hand again. “I’m sorry,” I whisper. “What does that feel like? To love somebody so intensely that you want to marry them?” I ask as I smile.
He shrugs. “Scary I suppose.” He smiles broadly as he puts his elbow on the table and leans on his hand. “You will find out one day. I wouldn’t write yourself off just yet. How old are you anyway?” He frowns.
I smile. “How old are you?” I ask.
“Probably too old for you,” he answers.
I smile. “Without a question.” He smirks. “I’m forty-two.”
“You are old,” I smile. “I’m twenty-seven.”
He smiles warmly at me. “Let’s forget about age and pasts and futures and just enjoy some time getting to know each other while we are both in Sydney. What do you say?”
“I don’t normally hang around with hot middle-aged men.” I smile.
“I don’t usually hang around with blond Americans either so we are even.” He smiles at me with a rather beautiful twinkle in his eye.
What the hell am I doing?
Natasha
I walk down the street toward the café near the hospital that I work at and my phone rings.
“What time is your lunch break? I’m coming to have lunch with you.”
I smile. It’s Jesten.
“Jes, I’m on lunch now.”
“See you in ten. I’m around the corner.” He hangs up. Shit, now I’ve done it.