Chapter 23
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
By the time he got home, neither of Cole’s parents were up, which was a relief as he didn’t want to talk to either of them. He didn’t know what he was going to say because it felt like whatever he said would lead to an argument.
He was allowed to take leave…the fact that he only took it when there were no jobs meant that he never took it for himself when he wanted it. He’d always been a team player. In this case, the team was his family.
But it felt like the more he did, the more they expected, and his contribution was never good enough.
His father didn’t want to hire someone else, because he hoped that his brother would return to work.
Cole doubted that would ever happen as his uncle was as depressed as fuck, but also because he had no need to work when he was being supported by his brother.
Cole showered and went to bed but barely slept because he wanted to be snuggled up next to Akai.
Since he couldn’t sleep anyway, he got up early to eat breakfast and research the best way to drive to Yellowstone.
He didn’t want to drive twelve hours a day, or longer, stopping only to sleep to get there as fast as possible.
He wanted to enjoy it, which meant planning places to stop and booking motels.
Nor was it as simple as getting in the truck and leaving, though they could wing it and hope to get a room. Not that Akai would be getting out to check for vacancies.
How the fuck was he supposed to drive nearly two thousand miles with a monster in the passenger seat? Surely people would notice?
And what about stopping for food at diners or whatever?
How was this supposed to work?
He made a list of questions to text Akai later, but before he got too deep in the planning and started making bookings.
When his father got up, he’d ask for three weeks’ leave.
That would give him time to drive there and back and enjoy a little bit of the party, as there was no point in going all that way and missing out.
Once Akai was there, he’d stay for the whole thing, which meant he’d be driving home alone.
It might be months before he saw him again.
He didn’t want that. Even though Akai had disrupted his life again, it was in a good way, and he didn’t want to go back to how things had been.
His father’s footsteps interrupted his peace. “You got in late.”
“Yeah, I lost track of time.” And hadn’t wanted to leave.
“Good weekend?”
“Yes.”
“Shall I assume you won’t be working this weekend?”
Cole bit back a sigh. “I told you that I no longer work weekends.”
His father grunted out a response as he made himself a coffee.
Since things were already tense, he might as well go all in. “I need to take a couple of weeks off. I’m planning a road trip with friends.”
One friend.
His father didn’t turn around to look at him. “This the same friend you’ve been meeting at the cabin?”
Cole shrugged. “What does it matter?”
“Are you in some kind of trouble?”
He didn’t think so. He doubted monsters went to all this effort to get a human to eat at the party. Akai had already done plenty of eating, and Cole had enjoyed every moment. His cheeks heated. “No.”
His father was silent for a couple of heartbeats. “Are you seeing someone?”
He didn’t know how to answer that, as it wasn’t as though he could bring a monster home to meet his parents. “Maybe.”
He turned around and leaned against the kitchen counter. “Do you think it’s a good idea to go on a road trip with someone you barely know?”
Cole felt as though he knew Akai better than some of his human friends. He didn’t talk about superficial bullshit like sports and TV shows with Akai. “I’ve known him for seven years.”
The word him hung in the air.
Fuck. He wasn’t usually that careless, not around his father.
There’d been too many things said when he was growing up and playing football for him not to be careful.
In that respect, the accident had given him the freedom to explore who he really was.
Not that he’d done much about it until he was well down the rehab path.
His father seemed to glitch with his coffee in hand.
Cole silently dared him to say something homophobic or just fucking rude.
“So you are gay then?”
“Yeah.”
“Your mother thought you were. I thought you were smarter than that.”
“Jesus fucking Christ, Dad, it’s got nothing to do with being smart. It’s who I am, and who I’m attracted to.” He grabbed his cereal bowl and put it in the dishwasher. “Three weeks leave.”
“In the middle of summer, when we’re busy? No.” His father shook his head.
“In the middle of summer, when it’s good for camping and road trips.” Given that the party was for solstice, he couldn’t delay his leave.
“I can’t spare you.”
Cole lifted his chin and held his father’s gaze. “Can’t or won’t?”
“Both.” His father took a drink of his coffee and returned Cole’s stare.
Cole pressed his lips together. “You can’t stop me from leaving.”
“If you go, you won’t have a job to come back to. Finding a part-timer for the weekend work wasn’t too hard. But I can’t hold a full-time position open for three weeks.”
As much as he didn’t like the job, he needed the job.
And it wasn’t as though he hated it…it was more that he hated what it represented and the way it kept him trapped in town.
But he didn’t want to burn his bridges and be stranded with no job and no idea.
“So I’m supposed to never take leave, unless you want to take leave and don’t book any jobs?
Is that right? Everything revolves around you? ”
“Because it’s my business putting a roof over your head.”
“This roof was paid off long ago. I remember the celebration.”
“We’re a family, so we do what’s best for the family.”
“You wanted us to move in with your brother to help take care of his wife. You dumped the care burden on Mom. I was an unneeded extra. Why do you think I put so much effort into football? It wasn’t because I loved the game and the training and all of that; it was because it was a way out, so I could have a different life.
One of my own making, yet here I am.” He lifted his arms and exhaled.
“You know what, fuck it, make it four weeks. And if there’s no job when I come back, I’ll find something else. ”
“It’s a family business.”
Cole couldn’t count the number of times he’d heard that. “I know, but I was never meant to work in it. That was never the plan. It’s taken me seven years, but I’m getting back to the plan.”
“You don’t have a plan unless someone tells you what plays to make. Is your boyfriend calling the shots this time? You don’t think it’s weird that he’s trying to get you away from your family, or that you only meet him at the cabin?”
“No.” If you knew he was a monster, you wouldn’t think that was weird either. You’d understand. Maybe. “The location works for both of us.”
His father grunted.
“I’ll let you know my travel dates.”
“That’s it? No discussion? You don’t even care that you’re leaving me in the lurch during the busy time of year?”
“I do care, but at the same time, I won’t get this chance again.
So I’m going to take it. You used to tell me to take those risks.
To go after what I want.” They’d had a better relationship before Cole had started working for him.
Back when his father had cheered him on…
perhaps his father had been living vicariously through him.
Had he once dreamed of more than working in the family business?
“That was when you were a kid. Now you’re an adult with adult responsibilities. You have to grow up at some point.”
“And what does that mean, exactly? Working hard and never doing what I want?”
“It means that sometimes you need to sacrifice what you want for the good of everyone else. In this case, the business.”
Cole considered his father for several seconds. “You want to fire me because I want to take some of the annual leave that I’m entitled to? Because I want to go on a road trip and have some fun…before I grow up and get a mortgage?”
“I gave you the job because you had nothing else, and because I was worried about you sitting in your room and only talking to psychologists.”
“And I’m grateful. Maybe it was what I needed at the time, but I’ve known for a while that I want something else, even if I don’t know what that is. So I’m going to take this chance and see what happens.”
“And expect us to pick up the pieces. Again.”
“I don’t expect that, but that’s what family does, right?
Drop everything to help? That’s what you did for your brother.
” Even when he was in hospital, recovering after the accident, everyone had been worried about his aunt and uncle because they’d lost both their sons.
They figured he was okay because he was in hospital, being taken care of.
And while that was true, there have been times he’d wished he had died.
His father pressed his lips together and shook his head. “Just tell me when you’re planning on leaving.”