22. Mae
TWENTY-TWO
Mae
“What are these?” I ask as a young man I don’t recognize hands me flowers. The bouquet is a colorful mix of various shades of purple, from lavender to deep plum. The flowers range in size and shape, some with delicate petals and others with bold, wide blooms. They are tied together with a simple white ribbon. The sweet and intoxicating scent fills my nostrils, a blend of floral and earthy aromas that instantly brings a smile to my face during this long day in the office.
I thank the delivery guy, and he leaves. The note is simple. “Just because.” It doesn’t include a signature. No anything. But I know who they came from.
I sniff each and every flower from the lavender and lilacs to the hyacinths. The whole office will smell like this for days.
A few minutes later, the culprit himself walks through the door. “I thought we agreed not to make this a thing.” I wave my hands to the flowers, but I can’t help myself, and a smile forms on my lips.
“No. You agreed to not make it a thing. I decided no such thing. I kissed you last night. We can’t take that back, and I desperately want a repeat.”
My face flushes, and I glance around the room to make sure no one is hovering around the office doors. “We can’t talk about this. And it can’t happen again.”
He wiggles his eyebrows. “We’ll see.”
Seth sits at his desk and proceeds to ignore me. Or at least I think he does. A few minutes later, a message pops up on Facebook.
Seth: Can we still send dirty messages to each other?
Mae: We never did before.
Seth: We should start.
Mae: I don’t think that’s a good idea.
Seth: Tell you what. You let me kiss you again sometime today OR I’ll send you a very explicit message tonight explaining exactly what will happen to you if you show up at my cabin after midnight again.
Mae: Not sure which one of those things I’d rather have more.
Seth: That wasn’t the response I was expecting. I can give you both if you want. And then wait for you to show up after midnight so I can make good on my promise.
I don’t look up from my computer because my face is flaming, and I don’t want to see the look in his eyes. Because I’m tempted to message him back and tell him we can do those things after midnight if he wants.
But I don’t.
Because I need to have some self-control. Somehow I became the good one in this not-a-relationship. Which is not really what I expected.
If Seth loses everything because of me, I’ll never forgive myself.
I hear his chair move. I still don’t look away from the slew of messages I should be answering but can’t read because all my mind can think about is what he wants to do to me after midnight.
His hand comes to my elbow. “Stand up, Mae,” he commands.
I shake my head.
“I’ll sit on your lap if I have to.”
I sigh and stand, and instead of letting go of me, he slides his hand around my waist and pulls me tight against him. He uses his other hand to tip my chin up so I’m looking him in the eye.
“We can’t…” I start.
But his lips are already on mine, moving with an urgent and passionate energy. I can feel the heat of his body pressing against me, and I instinctively wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him closer. A gentle breeze caresses my face as we continue to kiss, stirring strands of my hair in its wake.
I push away. “Seth! We can’t do this. The door is wide open.” I wave to the door.
He shrugs. “I don’t care anymore.”
“Well, I do. No more kissing. No more dirty messages. From now on, we are just coworkers. Nothing else.”
He raises an eyebrow. “We’re more than just coworkers, Mae. We’re friends.”
“Friends respect boundaries. Or do I need to start calling you Bryan?”
He frowns. “I won’t apologize. I’ll respect your boundaries, but I’m not giving up.”
I nearly tell him I don’t want him to give up.
“I’m going to see if Abi has any more material for me.” I cannot be in the same room with him right now.
The sky above is a dusty blue, the sun casting long shadows as I walk toward the river. The leaves on the trees rustle in the gentle breeze, their vibrant greens swaying in unison. The river sparkles in the sunlight, its waters rushing past. But as I get closer, I notice that Abi and Mark are nowhere to be seen. He’s nearly always down here.
I find one of the lifeguards who’s been here nearly as long as I have. “Where’s Abi?”
He shrugs. “She and Mark said they had to talk about some stuff and asked me to hold down the fort. I think they might have gone back to his house.”
I take the trail through the cabins and then grab a golf cart. It’s too far to walk.
Six carts are sitting outside the house, which isn’t Mark’s but actually belongs to Levi.
This must be serious. Maybe my dad found out, and they’re doing damage control.
I knock, and Abi answers the door. “Are you alone?” she whispers.
I nod.
“Good. Get in here.”
She yanks me in by the arm and slams the door shut, locking it. She pulls me down the hall to the living room where all of Seth’s brothers sit on couches and chairs. Ethan stands up and offers me his spot, and Abi and I take it, cuddling close together.
“What’s going on?” I ask.
“Well. Levi is finally on board, so we thought we’d have a family meeting and make some decisions.”
“You’re missing a few key members.” Obviously, Seth, but so are his parents. Somehow little Ollie managed to make it here though.
“That’s the point,” Ethan says matter-of-factly.
“So what is Levi finally on board with?” I doubt it’s his Levi the Lumberjack persona.
“We all want Seth to stay in Whisper Springs. Permanently.”
“He’s leaving in January. He’s been adamant about that. We’ve talked about it, and I’ve even offered to go with him. India awaits.”
“But why does he have to leave? He doesn’t need more money. He can stay here and work with Dad and us.”
I shrug. We’ve talked about his issues, but if he hasn’t shared them with his family, I won’t be the one who does.
“She knows,” Abi says. “I can see it in her face.” She turns to me. “Why can’t you tell us?”
“Because it’s personal. Ask him yourself. He might tell you.” Everyone is staring at me. I don’t like this at all.
“We’ve all tried. He just uses lame excuses like he’s already committed to this company in India,” Noah says. “But I checked with one of his friends that he usually works with, and he said that Seth can totally get out of the contract without losing anything.”
Mark turns to him. “Since when do you talk to Seth’s friends?”
“Since I needed an attorney, and Seth recommended him.”
“What the hell do you need an attorney for?”
“None of your business.”
“I’m sorry. I’m not betraying his confidence,” I say firmly. It doesn’t seem like it’s that big of a deal, but Seth was so reluctant to tell me. I can’t tell his family.
Mark crosses his arms but doesn’t speak for a moment. “Fine. But we can work on him even if we don’t understand the problem. The kayak thing was good. But we need more ideas.”
“Wait. Y’all staged the kayak thing?”
Seth was so mad about that. And frustrated that Mark couldn’t handle it. I can’t believe they did it on purpose.
“Yeah. We want him to feel like we can’t live without him. That was just me and Ethan though. The others have all gotten involved the last few days.” Mark leans forward, looking serious.
“You guys are sneaky.” As much as I don’t like that they’re making life more difficult for Seth, I love that they want to keep him here. Because that’s exactly what I want as well.
“Yep. And we could use your help, actually. We were just talking about you before you showed up,” Noah says.
“I already told you I’m not saying anything.”
“You don’t need to tell us anything. But the guy’s in love with you, and from what Abi said, you’re in love with him. Convince him to stay here with you.” Levi stares at me. I didn’t expect him to be the one to push it.
I wring my hands in my lap. I can’t be responsible for what might happen. “My dad…”
“Your dad is just blowing smoke,” Mark says. “I highly doubt he’ll actually do something that would hurt our family and you.”
“We can’t risk it.”
I spend the next half hour trying to convince them that even though I desperately want the same thing they do, I won’t put Whisper Springs at risk. Eventually they all have to go back to work, so I’m off the hook for now. But I have a feeling this won’t be the last time they try to talk me into going after Seth.
After the family meeting, Abi and I spend the afternoon taking pictures and videos. I don’t go back to the office at all. I can’t help but think of what her brothers told me. They’re all convinced everything will be fine, but I can’t underestimate my dad.
* * *
The scent of pine and wood smoke lingers in the air, mixed with the aroma of freshly cut grass. Someone is grilling nearby, the savory scent of meat making my stomach growl even though we just ate. The sky above the bunkhouse is dark and dotted with clouds. I’m going out with Seth tonight, but at least Abi will be with me.
We enter the bunkhouse, and most of the girls are already in for the evening. A lot are playing on their phones.
A box sits on my bed, and Abi claps her hands. “Oooh. What’s this? More presents from Seth? He’s working hard, isn’t he?”
I shake my head and grab the box, settling on Abi’s bunk with her across from me. I slice open the tape with my key and open the box. I close it again so she can’t see, my face flushing.
“What is it?” she asks. “Oh, look at your face. It’s something naughty, isn’t it?” She grabs for the box, but I pull it away from her.
“Oh, come on.”
“No.”
She’s going to tease me so badly, and then all the others will join in.
“Mae.” She pouts and reaches for it again, but this time I’m not hanging on tight enough, and she grabs it, dumping the contents onto the bed.
Four books fall out. All by the same author. My favorite.
“Alien romance? Girl, you’ve been holding out on me.” She grabs one of the books and scans the back of the cover. Then she flips it over and opens it. “Oooh, it’s signed and made out to you and everything.”
“What?”
I grab another book. “For Mae, Keep your eyes on the sky.” With the author’s signature.
Abi shrugs. “I bet these are better than the unicorn romances. I know they are signed, but can I read them when you’re done?”
“Sure.”
She narrows her eyes at me. “Why is Seth sending you signed books that I’ve never even heard of?”
I think fast. “Because he asked me the name of my favorite author the other day, and I didn’t even think. She writes dragon romances as well. Remember her stuff? I bet he didn’t realize I liked the other ones.”
Abi nods, flipping open to the front page. “I think we’ve found our new genre. Look at that. Seth was being useful, and he didn’t even know it.”
Her phone buzzes, and she glances down. “Gotta run.”
“Wait. You’re coming with me.”
Seth’s been wanting to get some good night shots for a while. In particular, he wanted the starry sky over the river. Abi’s always too busy with her boys at night to bother. After the incident with Bryan, it seems like she’s out every night. And she won’t talk to me about it at all.
She pulls a sweatshirt over her tank top. “Look, it’s cloudy. No way the stars will be visible at all.”
She’s not wrong, but Seth made us promise to meet him tonight. He’ll be pissed that she’s bailing on us again.
I send him a quick text and glare at Abi again. “Who’s the lucky guy tonight?”
“Jonathan.”
My mouth drops. “The one I went on a date with?”
“Yep. He’s so sweet, and his kisses are toe-curling.”
I want to think that maybe I judged him too quickly, but then again, I got a toe-curling kiss myself from Seth, so I can’t complain.
“Seth’s not responding. At least come with me to tell him that you can’t get the shots. Jonathan will wait for you.”
“You’re a big girl. Besides, you’re always looking for an excuse to be alone with him.”
I climb up onto my bed. “I’ve actually been avoiding alone-time with him. My dad’s been more suspicious than normal lately. At least you’re coming with us to Vegas.”
“Girl, I’m abandoning you as soon as we get there. You two will get lots of lip-locking time.”
I throw a pillow at her, and she dodges it. The pillow hits Kristy, and she throws it back, nailing Abi in the head, which messes up her hair.
Abi growls and tosses the pillow onto the bed.
“Go and kiss him under the clouds. No one else will be around. The storm tonight is going to be epic. Everyone will be locked up tight in their cabins.”
“And you?”
“I’ll be at Jonathan’s.” She smirks and walks away.
It’s already dark, but the clouds do look ominous. I almost grab a golf cart, but there’s a shortcut through the woods that the golf cart wouldn’t make. I hurry down the path, hoping that I can manage to get there before the rain starts.
I reach the edge of the woods and see Seth standing on the cliff, looking out over the river. He’s dressed casually today. Well, as casually as he can. He still has on slacks and a dress shirt, but the sleeves are rolled up, and it doesn’t look like he has a tie on.
If he were mine, and we didn’t have to hide, I’d sneak up behind him and wrap both my arms and legs around him. I’d kiss the back of his neck. He’d laugh and piggyback me to his cabin, where we’d strip off our clothes and listen to the thunder roll as we made love, and we’d fall asleep in each other’s arms.
But that’s not my reality.
As long as my dad gets his way, it’ll never be our reality.
Still, I’m not sure I could be happy with anyone but him.
I shake my melodramatic thoughts out of my head so I don’t do something stupid, and I step out of the woods to stand beside him.
“Abi’s not coming, is she?”
“She said it’s too cloudy to get the stars, so why bother?”
Seth points at the sky, and lightning flashes in streaks.
“Yep, those would’ve been terrific shots.” I’m not good with the camera like Abi is.
We watch the lightning in silence for a minute. It’s far enough away that we don’t have to be worried, but the wind has picked up, and the rain is coming quickly.
Our fingers brush together, and instead of jerking away, Seth curls his pinky finger around mine. There’s so much I want to say. So much I want to do. But it’s all forbidden.
“Mae, I…” But his words are lost in a huge clap of thunder and a sudden torrential downpour. Lightning flashes, this time way too close, and Seth wraps his hand around mine. “My cabin is closer. Let’s get out of here.”
We run in the rain, hands gripped tightly together, and within minutes we are at his cabin, dripping water all over his entryway floor. We both looked like drenched cats, and we start laughing.
Deka lifts her head from the couch and looks at us like we’re crazy.
“The thunder doesn’t bother her?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “She’s a weirdo. Loud noises make no difference to her at all.”
“That’s good. And good thing she wasn’t outside with us, or she’d be soaked as well.”
“Speaking of, we should change.”
“I should go.” I point to the door.
He glances out the window behind me. “It’s pouring, thundering, and there’s lightning. Your dad might get upset if we hook up, but he’d kill me if I let you go out in this weather and something happened to you. Looks like you’re stuck here for a bit.”
“Darn.”
He grins. “At least try to sound a little bit disappointed.”
“Time spent with you is never disappointing.”
He sucks in a breath but doesn’t say anything. Instead, he grabs my hand and pulls me upstairs to his room. I stand by the door, dripping all over the place, and he pulls out a t-shirt and a pair of tie lounge pants. “They’ll be big, but you can cinch them up so they don’t fall down.”
He points to the bathroom off of his room, and I debate whether to be brave and change in front of him. In the end, I chicken out. But I leave the door half open and turn so my back is to him. I don’t want to see if he’s watching or not.
Everything is soaked, so I have to go commando, and now I’m regretting leaving the door open. It would be too obvious now if I turned around to shut it. I move quickly and then grab a couple of towels out of the cupboard. I dry my hair and leave my wet clothes hanging on his shower door.
I turn around and see him standing near his bed, fire in his eyes. I swallow and hold up the towel. “I’ll clean up the stairs and the floor. I’ll see you back downstairs.”
He just nods and slips past me. I manage to get the floor wiped and then curl up on the couch with Deka. The rain is still coursing down, and every few minutes, thunder rocks the cabin. Seth plops down next to me. “Looks like you might be staying here tonight.”
“Looks like it.”
His face is twisted, and I sense his confusion over what to do. I feel the same way. But there’s no way nothing is going to happen. It would take an act of God to quench the fire that burns between us.
We need to set some ground rules.
I spin around and crawl into his lap so I’m straddling him, and my face is a few inches from his.
I bring my lips close to his ear. “Did you watch?” I ask, my voice breathy. Maybe there will be no ground rules tonight after all.
His hands grip my hips and pull me closer to him. “I’m no saint, Mae.” His voice is low and sexy.
I nip at his ear. “Good.”
I pull back and see the intensity in his eyes as his hands reach for my face, his fingers gently grazing my skin before they slide into my hair. We just stare at each other, and then we’re kissing. As our lips move together in a passionate dance, I can taste the faint hint of rain on his lips, a reminder of the storm raging outside.
After several glorious moments, I lean back. “We can’t have sex.”
He frowns.
“Not that I don’t want to,” I continue. “It’s just that after this, we’ll have to go back to pretending we have no feelings for each other, and I don’t think I can do that if we have sex.”
He runs a hand along his face. “You’re probably right. This is torture.”
“You’re telling me. I think about you every second of every day.”
He chuckles. “Same.”
“I probably should go.”
He glances out the window behind me. “The rain isn’t letting up.” He hesitates and swallows. “Stay the night with me. I just want to hold you and wake up to your beautiful face.”
I should say no and walk home in the rain. But I can’t. Instead, I nod, and he leads me up to his room. Deka follows us this time and jumps into the bed. Seth takes off his shirt and then slides off his pants, revealing boxer briefs. I’m not shy in my staring.
He wiggles his finger at me and cocks an eyebrow, and I don’t hesitate. I jump onto the bed. He climbs in after me and gives me a sweet kiss. This is what our life would be like, and my heart aches at the thought that it might never happen.
He pulls my back into his chest, and Deka curls into my front. I thank God for this moment. Seth’s breath becomes steady and even.
And so does mine.